What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb?

You can unscrew a lightbulb!

I wish someone had told me that 9 months ago

That one is as old as "Why did the chicken cross the road." Hmm, maybe older.

.... the Cirque du Soleil and the Folies Bergere?

One has a lot of cunning stunts, and .........

Tee Hee...

. . . a Northern fairy tale and a Southern fairy tale?

A Northern fairy tale begins, "Once upon a time..."

A Southern fairytale begins, "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit..."

. . . between a Harley and a Hoover?

The position of the dirt bag

. . . a Northern fairy tale and a Southern fairy tale?

A Northern fairy tale begins, "Once upon a time..."

A Southern fairytale begins, "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit..."

That's a good one! I don't know how many non-yanks will appreciate it, though.

Boonie will like it.

. . . a Northern fairy tale and a Southern fairy tale?

A Northern fairy tale begins, "Once upon a time..."

A Southern fairytale begins, "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit..."

That's a good one! I don't know how many non-yanks will appreciate it, though.

Assuming of course that non yanks (normal people) are interested..

totster

. . . a Northern fairy tale and a Southern fairy tale?

A Northern fairy tale begins, "Once upon a time..."

A Southern fairytale begins, "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit..."

That's a good one! I don't know how many non-yanks will appreciate it, though.

Assuming of course that non yanks (normal people) are interested..

totster

That one was below the belt . . .

No, Yanks belts are just hung low because of those big belly`s

(Tot`s, we`ll say your belly is all muscle for the sake of this fred, alright...??!)

Boonie will like it.

Y'all takin' the piss again?

Boonie will like it.

Y'all takin' the piss again?

Why, you Johnny Reb, Bonnie?

They're constantly taking the piss, on the piss, or having a piss.

Pissheads

Jim Carry Pissin'!!!

Q: What's the difference between a blonde and The Titanic?

A: They know how many men went down on The Titanic.

Q: What's the difference between a Mosquito and a blonde?

A: On slapping a Mosquito, it will stop sucking.

. . . a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.

. . . a Northern fairy tale and a Southern fairy tale?

A Northern fairy tale begins, "Once upon a time..."

A Southern fairytale begins, "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit..."

That's a good one! I don't know how many non-yanks will appreciate it, though.

All non-yanks will appreciate it - it's universal!

. . . a Northern fairy tale and a Southern fairy tale?

A Northern fairy tale begins, "Once upon a time..."

A Southern fairytale begins, "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit..."

That's a good one! I don't know how many non-yanks will appreciate it, though.

All non-yanks will appreciate it - it's universal!

Alright, I gotta hear this, why?

. . . a Northern fairy tale and a Southern fairy tale?

A Northern fairy tale begins, "Once upon a time..."

A Southern fairytale begins, "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit..."

That's a good one! I don't know how many non-yanks will appreciate it, though.

All non-yanks will appreciate it - it's universal!

Alright, I gotta hear this, why?

Television and the media ensure that we (non-yanks) know the difference between the various parts of the USA but particularly north and south. You can go back as far as 'Gone with the wind' to prove that!

. . . a Northern fairy tale and a Southern fairy tale?

A Northern fairy tale begins, "Once upon a time..."

A Southern fairytale begins, "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit..."

That's a good one! I don't know how many non-yanks will appreciate it, though.

All non-yanks will appreciate it - it's universal!

Alright, I gotta hear this, why?

Television and the media ensure that we (non-yanks) know the difference between the various parts of the USA but particularly north and south. You can go back as far as 'Gone with the wind' to prove that!

who said Hollywood has no educational value?

. . . a Northern fairy tale and a Southern fairy tale?

A Northern fairy tale begins, "Once upon a time..."

A Southern fairytale begins, "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit..."

That's a good one! I don't know how many non-yanks will appreciate it, though.

All non-yanks will appreciate it - it's universal!

Alright, I gotta hear this, why?

Television and the media ensure that we (non-yanks) know the difference between the various parts of the USA but particularly north and south. You can go back as far as 'Gone with the wind' to prove that!

Really? I didn't there would be much interest outside the states.

They're constantly taking the piss, on the piss, or having a piss.

Pissheads

English culture in a short sentance...

totster

What's the difference between and egg and a good wank?

You can beat an egg.....

What's the difference between a counterfeit dollar and a skinny blonde?

One's a phoney buck.

What's the difference between a counterfeit dollar and a skinny blonde?

One's a phoney buck.

totster

. . . between a Harley and a Hoover?

The position of the dirt bag

I liked this one.

. . . a bagpipe and an onion?

No one cries when you chop up a bagpipe.

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. . . the Great Highland and Northumbrian bagpipes?

The GHB burns longer [but the Northumbrian burns hotter]

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