What does it take to make a person react to aggressive and rude behaviour

[n210mp]

Had to read the open twice to make sure he wasn't talking about Houston, LA, or Chicago. I'd rather drive in Thailand, than those three cities. Want to talk about rude? Go to New York City.

Maybe you should have read the post a third or even fourth time and Why talk about the OP in the third tense, that's rude and further how do you know his or her gender?

For your information I have driven in New York and although its wild, fast and frenetic especially in the jams, there is an order about it which I also find similar to Bangkok.

If you had omitted the phrase "I'd rather drive in Thailand" then your post would have some relevancy to the thread but To be honest the thread was not about driving but about something else that you may have missed the point of.

Regards from "he" ............................."he" ....... that's me of course N210Mp but it should be He with a capitol H just to confirm Showbags verdict on me having "tickets on myself!

Third tense? Also, I never said anything about driving in NYC. The pronoun " he" in the absence of a qualifier is acceptable, as would "she." I had hoped your comprehension level was higher.

And, since I was stating comparable differences, as implied by your thread,in an open forum, I was not being rude. Merely stating my opinion.

OK my error apology accepted!

Read the small print

Any offence taken by those or them whilst the writer is in a state of High jinks or whilst experiencing the effects of the low of a previous high do so at their own risk and the writer acknowledges no liability whatsoever for anything other than a strange sense of humor not necessarily shared by others but largely accepted as eccentric behavior by those more charitable and in the know!

[n210mp]

Gee -- and here I thought was responding to rude and aggressive behavior (Maybe you should have read the post a third or even fourth time) in a manner of great civility

Touche owd pal

[transam]

By my own perception and experience of more than 3 years here.......If you do not speak a good Thai, and do not understand Thai customs and way of life, always you will be at risk in get "bad" responses and attitude. Thai people may agree or accept your attitude just in appearance, but not sincerely, sometimes just because cannot even understand what you say. In response, they just will do and act without any consideration to you.......and sometimes very hard...if your attitude was offensive for them in some ways.

And that, may happens in any culture, even between western cultures. Ask a North American it's opinion about South Americans.. or a German its opinions about Italians...

I cannot speak Thai, have tried but my ol' gray cells do not compute with any language, just me. I have many Thai friends from all walks of life and they now understand my "problem".

But guess what, I get asked to many functions by these Thai folk, why, cos they can "read" me, I am accepted as their friend even though I do not understand their lingo. Thankfully many understand my English so never really any problems. Plus I know how to conduct my self and be respectful, especially with folk older than myself.

In fact I get a hug from many ladies at these events that really is unheard of, Mrs.Trans tells me folk can read your heart, your face, your eyes, plus you sing very good........

[metisdead]

Off topic posts have been removed.

[1BADDAT]

if you think NYC people are aggressive and rude to strangers,

then you know nothing about NY or its people,

New York people are considered some of the friendliest in the world

You can't be serious?

[transam]

Had to read the open twice to make sure he wasn't talking about Houston, LA, or Chicago. I'd rather drive in Thailand, than those three cities. Want to talk about rude? Go to New York City.

Maybe you should have read the post a third or even fourth time and Why talk about the OP in the third tense, that's rude and further how do you know his or her gender?

For your information I have driven in New York and although its wild, fast and frenetic especially in the jams, there is an order about it which I also find similar to Bangkok.

If you had omitted the phrase "I'd rather drive in Thailand" then your post would have some relevancy to the thread but To be honest the thread was not about driving but about something else that you may have missed the point of.

Regards from "he" ............................."he" ....... that's me of course N210Mp but it should be He with a capitol H just to confirm Showbags verdict on me having "tickets on myself!

Third tense? Also, I never said anything about driving in NYC. The pronoun " he" in the absence of a qualifier is acceptable, as would "she." I had hoped your comprehension level was higher.

And, since I was stating comparable differences, as implied by your thread,in an open forum, I was not being rude. Merely stating my opinion.

if you think NYC people are aggressive and rude to strangers,

then you know nothing about NY or its people,

New York people are considered some of the friendliest in the world

Thought they had special teams walking subway cars to protect passengers in NYC. Red berets I think, perhaps that has finished now, I don't know.

[Scarpolo]

if you think NYC people are aggressive and rude to strangers,

then you know nothing about NY or its people,

New York people are considered some of the friendliest in the world

You can't be serious?

Yeah, dead serious,

but I refer to people born and raised there,

not just anyone who flocks there

[thailiketoo]

if you think NYC people are aggressive and rude to strangers,

then you know nothing about NY or its people,

New York people are considered some of the friendliest in the world

You can't be serious?

Yeah, dead serious,

but I refer to people born and raised there,

not just anyone who flocks there

You mean like people who were born and raised in Thailand don't have a problem with rude people in Thailand?

Edited April 21, 2014 by thailiketoo

[Scarpolo]

I remember those guys, Russel something was the leader?

I can see his face now but not his name

that was during the 1980's when the CIA introduced crack to kids

[jacko45k]

This morning a Thai lady invited me to move ahead of her in the supermarket queue " cos you only have little bit "

And when I pay I am going to take ages to find my purse and then pay with small coins.....

Edited April 21, 2014 by jacko45k

[thaibeachlovers]

Go ahead and ram them or pop them in the schnozz if it would make you feel better.

Thanks for a succinct, well balanced and thoughtful reply.

Now read the thread title again and this time answer the question asked!

Not a question without a question mark.

Btw, I understand the pushing in bit. KFC for sure especially when they open a new queue. Lifts drive me crazy. Doors open and it's on, people pushing in while others try and push their way out.

Just ignore and it makes it easier on yourself.

I enjoy lifts and the skytrain in Bkk when people try to push in before I get out. Being rather larger than the average Thai I just stand there and they can't get past.

For a much, much worse place for the locals queue jumping, saudi would be hard to beat.

[transam]

One of the most difficult things for me to do is to be tolerant of fools. However, being a little guy with no heart for a fight I have had to learn how to live my short life as best I can, being surrounded by fools of every age, gender, race and credo. The strong and aggressive will always bully the meek and mild. I choose the life of a pacifist through necessity and I am grateful that I am not big and strong because I would have murdered a million by now.

Just an observation.

Your right, if you are big or small your strength is avoiding stuff. There is more inner strength achieving that folk will ever know. If it comes to the crunch, well, you do your stuff...........

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=3mEWrh-91Gc...............

[brit1984]

most thai people have always been really nice to me

i feel as a farang i get a lot of special treatment

especially AFTER my wife ran away and left me broke

sorry for others who have had a different experience

[Frank James]

From Barry Sandal's excellent book, "Foreign Relations":

'Always remember:

Who You Are

Where You Are From

Where You Are Now.'

If some guy cuts jumps your queue at KFC, they might be doing you a favor, causing you to think for a moment...did I move here from halfway around the world so that I could stand in line for this "food" that I hardly ever ate back there?

Seriously, if you have been here for a s long as you indicate, you must know the folly of getting into a beef with a local over some rinky-dink BS? No matter what, you are going to come out down one. Relax!

[NoshowJones]

Go ahead and ram them or pop them in the schnozz if it would make you feel better.

To the OP, "occasionally" backward country??????

[Johnnie99]

I just push back in front of them ... works flawlessly.

[thailiketoo]

From Barry Sandal's excellent book, "Foreign Relations":

'Always remember:

Who You Are

Where You Are From

Where You Are Now.'

If some guy cuts jumps your queue at KFC, they might be doing you a favor, causing you to think for a moment...did I move here from halfway around the world so that I could stand in line for this "food" that I hardly ever ate back there?

Seriously, if you have been here for a s long as you indicate, you must know the folly of getting into a beef with a local over some rinky-dink BS? No matter what, you are going to come out down one. Relax!

Boy are you right. A long time ago I was a newby here and almost got killed for 10 baht. I finally outran the guy with the machete and collapsed in the back of a bar by a dumpster. Breathing hard, hiding my head and clutching my 2 inch pocket knife that had contested a two foot Crocodile Dundee sticker I really felt foolish.

[In Search of Space]

I have learnt a new technique for tailgaters while driving...if anyone interest to know this new and very successful technique, just ask.

A bag of nails ?

[NoshowJones]

I have learnt a new technique for tailgaters while driving...if anyone interest to know this new and very successful technique, just ask.

I wonder if it would be "put on your hazzard lights and slow down gradually"

[chiang mai]

That works for me, even if it means stopping.

[thejcb]

In Thai language, Tell them that you are 'P', you are a senior citizen, Ask them if they would talk to a Thai man of similar age in that fashion. Keep asking until you get an answer. Tell them that they are disrespecting you and its just not good enough, who do they think they are ! I do this quite a bit but I am also a bit aggressive with it too. Not physically but intimidating all the same. I hate it when they think they can say anything to me because I am a foreigner. I let them know they can't.

[bigehitewarrior]

Possibly some jealousy coupled with a misunderstanding of why Farang comes to thailand ... just a thought ...

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[In Search of Space]

Come to the MIddle East, much worse queue barging. Here I just tell them to get to the back, either physically, verbally or both, or just step in front and tell the shop assistant that I was first. If a person in Thailand steps in front, I either ignore it or if possible, just step in front again, depending upon the situation.

[Neilcnx]

I might say something like (and I have) "I was here first but if you're in a hurry - please go ahead." Never had a taker.

[chrissables]

I just push back in front of them ... works flawlessly.

I usually tell the staff at the shop i was first, then they have the problem! Works most of the time and deflects any issues!

[ggt]

I lived in the Kingdom for about 3 or 4 years and when the stupid behaviour, saving face BS, general stupidity got on my nerves I left. Now I am only back in Thailand for about 6 or 7 months every year and also a little more patient, the things that used to bother me don't seem to do the same anymore. A huge part is the switch in my mind, I just turn it off and walk away if I think something is going to annoy me, not a pride thing but my way of coping. We also have to remember also that Thai's generally don't grow up and therefore a smile is sufficient for them. I don't want to impress my values or beliefs on them, why should I? My love for the Kingdom allows me to forget the bad things. On the other hand I'm sure we've encountered the boorish know-all farang who has the colonial mindset and if only we could go back to our old ways.For the relatively small hassle we go through, it's better in Thailand than anywhere else on earth.

I also meet the farangs who are just angry all the time due to money, girls etc etc. I never want to be in that club.

it's better in Thailand than anywhere else on earth.

Really? That is why you have to spend half or your time in another country...so you can cope with... as you describe...stupid behavior...Saving face BS...and general stupidity...

In what way is Thailand...better than anywhere else on earth? And if it is so wonderful...why don't you live here 12 months of the year...?

[Travel Dude]

Just say nicely and in perfect Thai: kratod na krap... With a big smile and regain your place.

And when they speak not nice tell them in a soft, polite tone, and in Thai, that it is not very nice what they say...

They will feel ashamed and step back and... learned a gentle lesson.

[Carl64]

I find that if I am getting angry dealing with the Thais ..... I just go home and start again tomorrow when I am in a better frame of mind. Thailand is great for getting in return what you put out. If I am happy and smiley that's what I get back. Angry and I get it back 10 fold.

[Runamile]

In another thread, I tired of apologists for a version of Thai culture that THEY have dubbed "Thai Culture".

As I remember it, Thai culture was one where guests were treated with great respect. I also remember when, perhaps more important, Thais treated each other with respect.

I have only once "called" a Thai, predictably a taxi driver, a gentleman who believed he knew way better than me what was in my mind - over and over. Finally, as he began to accept that I know me better than he knew me, he told the assembled multitude that I, clearly, needed a mental hospital; and maybe he should take me there. He shrank away when I pointed that one more word and he'd need the hospital, albeit for physical issues. What happened to the polite wai in response to my polite "No thank you?"

I suspect that good manners are of such recent vintage that most, actually, remember them. Certainly, in China, when I've "called" behaviour, I've either received straightforward apologies or a very embarrassed look. BTW, I'm a sufficiently old hand that I can detect the difference between embarrassment in the eyes and aversion of gaze as a confrontation avoidance mechanism.

Many here have complained about colonial behaviours by farangs. It's a real problem. Equally, though, it's a similar act of pretension and superiority to rote out excuses for bad behaviour. It has the tone of "you can't expect more from them", even you "can't expect more from their culture" - a culture that has, until recently, been one of the utmost grace; and one that many Thais would prefer was restored. Undoubtedly, it would be better if those Thai people spoke out than farangs speaking out. Maybe, a cultural issue, and one for all time is that Thailand is a little too live and let live?????? Thereagain, for many farangs, that's the very attraction of Thailand.

[Wordworx]

You get the same thing all over SE Asia, more to lesser degrees.

Other than the increasingly absurd and oblivious-driver conditions on the roads, don't encounter much of what you described. A few times, not much.

Try China, if you wanna test your patience. Travel some of the cities, especially in the north. Last time in (after 4 years earlier stint) before I got back out I was body-slamming some of the dudes. All I can figure, "LIttle Emperors" now grown up -- physically, not mentally, completely unaware of any other person's situation or objective. Airline on the way out, one F-ker would NOT get out of the aisle...The women, too, but not so bad. Just the middle-aged old school broads thinking they can butt in front of a laowai. Usually can take care of that with raised voice, same here a couple of times (also middle aged women).

But compared to the Mainland Chinese, the Thai are gracious in the extreme -- even if 90% of the time they are faking it. And they are.