Dowry / sinsod - how do I legally bring the money to Thailand?

[Swiss1960]

Transfer it to your fiancée's Thai account and then withdraw it after you arrive.

Thanks, that's an excellent idea. I also have her mom's account number. The problem is that when I talked to my bank they told me that Siam Commercial Bank has 3 different SWIFT numbers and I have to know the right one. I can't seem to communicate that to my gf because of language differences. But I will work on that approach. I would also rather hand over the money at the wedding, not before for practical and symbolic reasons.

Paying for your wife is one thing... and your problem... so won't comment on that stupid idea...

but for the money, you can bring the 15K US$ in cash, you declare it when leaving the US and show the pay-out slip / letter from your US bank and then declare it at Thai immigration... and that is all, no isses with bringing that money... as long as you don't publicly waive it and make yourself the victim of a robbery...

[NickJ]

Paid posters??

[NickJ]

Sin sod in most cases that involve Issan women who have either been hitched before, have children are or have been prostitutes.....Is used to fully establish that the farang is a complete idiot and has little or no understanding of anything going on in Thailand....and that he will be very easy to dupe out of money in the future. He will be known from now on as simply Atm

[hhgz]

"I can't seem to communicate that to my gf because of language differences."

Yet you're going to give her mom 500K THB, and marry her. Is the universe of women who will "date" you so small that you need to have a relationship with someone with whom you cannot communicate? You don't need "luck", you need "common sense".

[otherstuff1957]

As any sinsot thread soon turns into a free-for-all, I thought that I would throw in my two cents: Beware of Wells Fargo. If they can see a way to legally steal your money, they will do so. BofA raped me for a couple of thousand and WF is no better.

Having said that, compare the exchange rates of Wells Fargo and the local bank. It might be worthwhile to convert the money to Baht before wire transferring over.

As for paying sinsot, I got lucky... My wife's parents and grandparents all died before we met.

[Rajhulmaheesh]

I can see MIL loving a cashiers cheque

Try bearer bonds.

Is the girl a bar kind of girl? If she is no need to worry about pilfering. IT will happen....................lol.

[Rajhulmaheesh]

What's best?

What's best is to keep that kind of money in the United States.

Failing that, maybe the inlaws have a PayPal account?

thanks - I hadn't thought of that. However, the family are rural farmers and do not own a computer or have internet access.

$15,000? Why not buy a couple of pigs and a chicken. You dont want to show wealth to rural people.

This could get funny!

[Rajhulmaheesh]

What's best?

What's best is to keep that kind of money in the United States.

Failing that, maybe the inlaws have a PayPal account?

thanks - I hadn't thought of that. However, the family are rural farmers and do not own a computer or have internet access.

$15,000? Why not buy a couple of pigs and a chicken. You dont want to show wealth to rural people.

This could get funny!

[Rajhulmaheesh]

"Suggestions?"

RUN!

Family rural farmers, newbie signed up today dropping 500k on woman, etc. I smell a troll.

However, at the slim chance you ain't and for the benefit of others... if you do go down that road, make sure you get most of it back, which IS the Thai way. Cashier's cheque wouldn't work as the whole point is to show off to everyone what their daughter is 'worth'. Also ask yourself, would a Thai man put up that kind of money for this lady.

Thanks for that. And I do worry. However, they did not ask for the money and neither my gf nor her family have ever asked for money. It came up at meeting with all of her village and they asked what I would pay. I made the offer, based on the fact I had paid $10k to my first wife's family 12 years ago. They built a new home and never asked for more. I think you are probably right about the check - although they could waive it around at everybody to see lol.

I keep reminding myself that $15k in the US will only get you a used pickup truck - maybe the same in Thailand. And she is worth so much more to me than a truck (well, depending on the model - just kidding,)

Anyway - my concern is about safety and not having trouble with the bank or immigration people.

HUH? A village said you must pay and future family doesnt decide? Only thing I can say is you deserve all the crazy things that will happen to you in this bought and paid for marriage.

But on a serious note, you can bring 19,999 US dollars into Thailand without declaring it.

I really hope this is a troll post.

Doesnt matter. Guy s do what this guy is doing everyday. What is the appeal???????????????????????????????????????????????

[landrews33]

So ... for those who are interested in the final outcome of this post:

I brought US 13,000 cash no problem. Went to declare it at Customs at Suvanabhumi and they told me any amount under 20,000 USD did not need to be declared. SCB Bank had no questions converting to TB at 31/ dollar.

Was I conned? Time will tell but I don't think so. The parents did a no-expense-spared wedding for 200 people at their own cost - including great food, a live band with 3 story stage, 12 coyote dancers who have mastered twerking as an art form - 2 lady boys and a singer. And we are pretty darn happy.

Thanks and best wishes to all.

[neeray]

Bravo and congratulations to the groom.

We never knew all the details (how you met her, the courtship ....) but you went with your heart and all has turned out well so far.

You did not listen to the smearing and broad-brush painting of Thai girls that some sour-pusses attempted to lay on you.

Some advice to you was good, some not.

You handled the transfer of your cash successfully. One tried to tell me that it is only 10k you can bring in from the USA, not 20k as I suggested (I just ignored that one).

Like me, I'm sure many still believe in the possibility of a farang/Thai girl romance.

I wish you all the best in your marriage. I think you are off to a great start.

I hope to hear from you in a year.

[The Fat Controller]

Congratulations to you and your wife, hope you have a long and happy marriage.

I too went down the sinsod route. much to the disgust of the cynics on this forum.

We have been happily married for a year now, sinsod was returned in full as agreed and there have been no requests for anything from immediate or extended family.

As neeray said above, Thai/Foreigner relationships can and do work.

[EyesWideOpen]

Guess the sin sod chestnut will periodically appear on TV forever I guess.

If your wife is a virgin, university educated, and has powerful family members,

I guess you could be at one with Thainess, and pay it. If she is a farm girl,

has two kids from the farm boy down the lane, and has had five previous

farang boyfriends / sponsors, she is used goods, and if you paid sinsod

you have been had. If she actually loves you, she will tell the greedy parents

to shut up and marry you anyway....It actually is a good test !! :-)

[Time Traveller]

So ... for those who are interested in the final outcome of this post:

I brought US 13,000 cash no problem. Went to declare it at Customs at Suvanabhumi and they told me any amount under 20,000 USD did not need to be declared. SCB Bank had no questions converting to TB at 31/ dollar.

Was I conned?

You sure were. THB/USD is around 32.52.....source:http://www.superrich1965.com/

[Robby nz]

I do hope it works out for you because it certainly can and you can have a great life here. But there are so many times when it does not.

However I cant help being a bit cynical, if I have this right.

You have been married to a Thai girl before who you paid US$10k for, that was used to build a house for the parents. That means it didn't work out in some way.

You have now married another Thai girl who you have trouble communicating with, which would mean you cant speak Thai and she either has limited English or cant speak it, that would mean you certainly cant communicate with her parents. You didn't learn Thai when you were with your first wife.

You paid 500kb for her sin sod for this one and her parents put on a great wedding do which they paid for. With your 500kb.

I was wondering if her parents gave her a piece of land as a wedding present to build a nice big house on for you both to live in......or for them when you move out.

[neeray]

Lots of unhappy people expressed their "sour grapes" attitude to this topic.

Broad-brush painting is alive and well !

[worgeordie]

If you are going to pay THB 500,000, you do realize this is only the

first payment of many you will have to pay,marry a nice Indian girl

and the family will pay you.

regards Worgeordie

[RT555]

Another delusional caring handing over excessive amounts of cash....WAY TOO MUCH.

[angiolo]

I have not paid anything for my wife/gf. IT ia all bullshine to pay for a daughter. The Thais get one for nothing , so why you. Dont be a mug, it will end in tears. the greed gets worse as time goes by. Find another girl and then I wont laugh at you.

[EyesWideOpen]

Lots of unhappy people expressed their "sour grapes" attitude to this topic.

Broad-brush painting is alive and well !

Reality is alive and well also.... :-)

[timberpond]

I was once offered the following terms and conditions...

800k and preferably 1 million. 50k to the parents and 50k to grandparents.

Balance 700k will be returned to 'us' and safe keep in the joined saving accounts or my account but she holds the bank book.

This money has conditions. It cannot leave thailand. It cannot use for any purposes other than building family. Be it opening a small provision shop or a coffee stall. Simply use it for house building is also fine. I just cannot use the money without her agreement. I'm a bike freak and no, I cannot use this money for my bike hobby.

During wedding, she will pay for everything from tentage to food and decorations. I will have to pay for the alcohol and sodas.

My questions

1) Does the thais pay that much? - no, average is 200k - 300k in my village.

2) Then why must I pay that much? - Be honest, because you are a foreigner. You can just walk out of the relationship and vanish into thin air and I could not seek justice even to the in-laws family. Secondly, I will be questioned by many relatives for your abilities to take care of me. You cannot work in thailand. You do not owns any business or lands in thailand. This 'show' money is just to shut them up. It will be returned to you after the wedding but the conditions still apply. The 50k to parents are standard pricing for thais. We are an average family living 30 mins away from the city and not some deep mountain village. With some well to do relatives, I do have my part to answer. I'm not a divorcee and I'm a graduate in hotel management from a reputable university. In short, I have a clean and good background.

I think it has a lot to do with who you are marrying and her/family background.

[Dogmatix]

There is no problem getting this money to Thailand but getting it out again will be difficult.

[Dogmatix]

"Suggestions?"

RUN!

Family rural farmers, newbie signed up today dropping 500k on woman, etc. I smell a troll.

However, at the slim chance you ain't and for the benefit of others... if you do go down that road, make sure you get most of it back, which IS the Thai way. Cashier's cheque wouldn't work as the whole point is to show off to everyone what their daughter is 'worth'. Also ask yourself, would a Thai man put up that kind of money for this lady.

Thanks for that. And I do worry. However, they did not ask for the money and neither my gf nor her family have ever asked for money. It came up at meeting with all of her village and they asked what I would pay. I made the offer, based on the fact I had paid $10k to my first wife's family 12 years ago. They built a new home and never asked for more. I think you are probably right about the check - although they could waive it around at everybody to see lol.

I keep reminding myself that $15k in the US will only get you a used pickup truck - maybe the same in Thailand. And she is worth so much more to me than a truck (well, depending on the model - just kidding,)

Anyway - my concern is about safety and not having trouble with the bank or immigration people.

If they are just rural farmers, you are certainly paying top dollar for their daughter. My maid's daughter got married at 18 to a boy from their village for only B30k. The marriage lasted only a year when they moved to Bangkok together to work and the girl found she could find much better men in the city and dumped her husband. Now she is marrying again and has secured a deal of B150k plus 4 baht of gold. Her mother is over the moon with joy at being able to sell off her daughter twice and at getting a much better price the second time around in the city. I guess the groom and his family are unaware of the first marriage, as Thais don't pay sin sot for second hand brides. You should check out this point too.

Edited May 13, 2015 by Dogmatix

[Dogmatix]

"Suggestions?"

RUN!

Family rural farmers, newbie signed up today dropping 500k on woman, etc. I smell a troll.

However, at the slim chance you ain't and for the benefit of others... if you do go down that road, make sure you get most of it back, which IS the Thai way. Cashier's cheque wouldn't work as the whole point is to show off to everyone what their daughter is 'worth'. Also ask yourself, would a Thai man put up that kind of money for this lady.

Thanks for that. And I do worry. However, they did not ask for the money and neither my gf nor her family have ever asked for money. It came up at meeting with all of her village and they asked what I would pay. I made the offer, based on the fact I had paid $10k to my first wife's family 12 years ago. They built a new home and never asked for more. I think you are probably right about the check - although they could waive it around at everybody to see lol.

I keep reminding myself that $15k in the US will only get you a used pickup truck - maybe the same in Thailand. And she is worth so much more to me than a truck (well, depending on the model - just kidding,)

Anyway - my concern is about safety and not having trouble with the bank or immigration people.

Sinsot has nothing to do with the village or anyone else except the girls family. You do not offer, they say what they think is right and then you negotiate. If she has been previously married, has children or ever worked in a bar you should not pay a dime anyway, that;s the Thai way. 500k is ONLY appropriate for a virgin with a degree. Anything else and i'm afraid you are being taken for a ride.

You are about right. The girl's family usually name their price and you bargain. This is often done through an intermediary who is acceptable to both parties but certainly not the whole village. 500k is indeed way above the range for most farm girls. 30-100k would be more normal but bear in mind that some gold is also required in addition to the cash. A dowry of 500k would normally be accompanied by 10-20 baht weight of gold. Be prepared for a supplementary demand for the gold. I sometimes hear of dowries of a million plus being paid in villages but bear in mind that a lot of dowry numbers are actually fake. Sometimes the money is really there and shown around to the villagers but a large portion is taken back immediately after that and returned to whomever it was borrowed from. Other times they quote the number of, say, 1 million at the ceremony but what is actually on show is only 500k or so. It's all about face. The sad part of village girl dowries is that the groom's family frequently borrow the money from loan sharks and then force the girl to work hard to pay off their debt. They may even force her to borrow money back from her parents which they don't repay and get the sin sot back that way. So it is not all that you see.

BTW how does someone living overseas meet rural farm girls unless they are working in bars, massage parlours etc? If you go to rural areas by yourself, you will certainly not meet any of them, specially if you are not fluent in Thai.

[mogandave]

I would just bring cash