Do village girls need to be more selective?

[smotherb]

17 minutes ago, SiamBeast said:

@smotherb In your case, your mother is a widow - the father died. As I stated in my post, widows are the exception, because it's not their fault (unless they killed their husband). Therefore, your mother has the right to experiment love like anyone.

 

My post is primarly addressed to women who decide to pop a kid at a young age without being in a stable relatiomship, or who decide to separate from the father.

 

Well, now you are adding more stipulations to what you said. Still, I maintain that a single woman with children, widowed or not, does not have to be promiscuous. Now, if the woman has several children each with a different father each, or if she does not even know who the fathers are; she may be promiuscuous, 

[Steiner]

It's funny how many guys with happy relationships and Thai wives/girlfriends who don't have a child, have a niece or nephew that their wife/girlfriend does pay particular attention to...
Remember with Thai girls children and dogs are shipped of to mum with alarming regularity, parenting skills are hardly world class here.
 

[473geo]

3 minutes ago, smotherb said:

Yes, a standard, it is very common in the countries I mentioned for single women to have children.

 

Perhaps it is your own naive inability to understand.

You didn't answer the question

 

"I believe all women have children for one reason; do I need to explain that to you? "

[smotherb]

Just now, 473geo said:

You didn't answer the question

 

"I believe all women have children for one reason; do I need to explain that to you? "

Oh, now you want me to answer the question I asked you. That's alright if you do not know, find a stork to explain it to you.

[473geo]

2 minutes ago, smotherb said:

Oh, now you want me to answer the question I asked you. That's alright if you do not know, find a stork to explain it to you.

Asian women have children because there is no welfare, the children are their 'insurance' to be looked after in their old age.

Given this scenario it really is not that important if the father sticks around, he is probably just another mouth to feed. Besides as stated above many of the children will spend their formative years being raised by their grand parents while the mother works. So if Papa contributes fine, if not life goes on.

 

Not really anything to do with birdlife!!

 

 

[notmyself]

5 hours ago, CharlieH said:

For many I think the selection/choice goes to "farang" and almost any farang will do as its better than the Thai option in many places, or so I am told.

"You have friend for me?" is a common question asked when I am with the wife, they dont care who or what or where, if its a farang they must have money, (assumption) possible International travel options, usually a pension, better than "butterfly somchai" thats usually on offer in the village.

 

 

So low is the quality and so often have I seen it that I will not go even on a blind date with someone who has less than a PhD. I live alone and would rather live alone when the option is a dullard.

[Steiner]

What is surprising here is the OP's feeling of inferiority, why does he feel that lowering himself to eat bugs and an unhealthy diet, and to 'like' some old woman that sees him as an ATM, is beneficial?
If it was a middle class Thai family they would not be happy if their daughter showed up with him, if it was a supposed hi so family, they would simply have him whacked.

 

I will never understand the Thai apologists who appear to think Thai's have some kind of reverence or are in some way an ideal to be looked up to.

I eat what I want, I don't eat to placate anyone.

 

People being attacked on this post for generalising, is simply stupid, on an online forum one has to generalise when talking about peoples or a region,  there might be a handful of guys feeling aggrieved because their Thai wife is all that, to them, but they are a very small minority,  most up country Thai people are quite similar in their outlook and perception of what is right and wrong.

[Dumbastheycome]

This  is one I am definitely  going to confer with  my wife about. lol 

But so  far the  offense, the  defense, and the  quick  passes have showed  the  start of  a  great  game ! 

[Ooladolla]

In most western countries the divorce rate is 33%. I can't say the % here but it seems very very high with so many women taking care of their children alone, which is pretty sad. Why ?

[BernieOnTour]

On 3/3/2017 at 1:05 PM, Gecko123 said:

I've been living up-country for some years now.

 

Put bluntly, some of these foreign guys the local girls hook up with and bring back to the village fall into the 'look what the cat dragged in' category.

 

Ladies, you know what I'm talking about.  Maybe not the heavy set girl in the back row with the lazy eye , but in my opinion, the rest of you need to set your sights higher. You can do better than this. A little more self-confidence, a little more patience, the payoffs will be enormous.

 

Novel idea: hold out for a guy that you actually like. Who likes Thai food. Who wants to get to know your mother. And your father. Who's hard working. Who doesn't want to sit around drinking beer and smoking all day long. Who you're proud to go to immigration with.

 

The village will forever thank you for your shrewd choices.

 

Am I lyin'? Do you want to kill me for this post?

Well, as we are anyway doing a generalization, we can also turn that by 180 degrees:

 

Why do you foreign guys let village ladies hook you?

In the larger Thai cities there are so many ladies with a good education and a good job, coming from a decent family - you can do better than this.

 

Hold out for a lady, that can be a real partner, value-wise and education-wise. Who is open for new experiences and prepared adapt to your western ways, as you are prepared to adapt to her Thai ways.

 

;-)

Edited March 4, 2017 by BernieOnTour

[473geo]

Guys some of us have gained both experience of city living, and country life,....we prefer the country life....there will be no Hi-so Bangkok ladies hiking through the paddy fields in their wellies  We enjoy the quiet, spending time with our families, Not frequent visitors to bars and restaurants. Home cooking.

I have seen many farang partners come to the countryside/Village and clearly it is not for them, they spend their time drinking to excess and socialising with other like minded Farangs, this approach does not appear to work, cheap living cheap beer. Their wives not surprisingly appear to tire quickly of this lifestyle. Usually these guys will return to the city with or without the wife.

Guys who originate from rural backgrounds in my opinion stand a much better chance of success in Isaan

Should the Isaan ladies be more selective - sure don't select a city boy.

[swissie]

4 hours ago, bazza73 said:

Hardly rocket science. Up country, the average Thai girl is lucky to be making 2000 - 3000 baht a month in the rice fields. That's before being raped or impregnated by the local jai choo. A falang comes along who gives them 8000 - 12000 baht a month for living expenses. They would not care if said falang had two heads and is as hairy as an orang-utang.

Amazing. Above post (consisting merely of 5 sentences)says it all in a nutshell.

All the books, all the university studies concerning "the problematic aspects of Farang/Thai relationships" have become "unnecessary readings".
Cheers.

[Ulic]

I think you misunderstand the woman's main objective. A good provider that

will not trade her in for an upgrade in a year or two. Both sides play the "game".

Women and Farang. Neither side is entirely guilty or innocent. Some women

are looking to milk men for as much as they can and as many men as they can.

Some men are looking for semi relationships, trading in the women every few

years. I had an interesting conversation with my mother (born in Vietnam in

the 30's when it was a French colony) She said back in the day it was fully

understood without anything being said. The old ex-pat would enjoy the girls youth

and care from mid-age (50's) until death. In return he would leave her fully set

up for life when he died with a house, cash, and a pension. A win, win, for both

parties. She saw nothing wrong with this.

[473geo]

11 minutes ago, swissie said:

Amazing. Above post (consisting merely of 5 sentences)says it all in a nutshell.

All the books, all the university studies concerning "the problematic aspects of Farang/Thai relationships" have become "unnecessary readings".
Cheers.

No does not, it gives an example why the initial connection is made.......because there can be no doubt there may well come a time, if the relationship is not handled well, when monthly stipend doesn't cut it anymore!

[eldragon]

4 hours ago, Stevemercer said:

Novel idea: hold out for a guy that you actually like. Who likes Thai food. Who wants to get to know your mother. And your father. Who's hard working. Who doesn't want to sit around drinking beer and smoking all day long. Who you're proud to go to immigration with.

 

I'm not sure there are many single and available 'good' farang hanging about in villages in rural Thailand? Besides, there's nowhere near enough 'bad' farang to satisfy the demand. 

 

Hold out? Have you met these girls? Go down to Nana, Patong, or Walking Street sometime and tell me how many of those girls seem like keepers to you.

[notmyself]

6 minutes ago, 473geo said:

No does not, it gives an example why the initial connection is made.......because there can be no doubt there may well come a time, if the relationship is not handled well, when monthly stipend doesn't cut it anymore!

 

lol. I must say that you come across as the type who considers work an occupational hazard.

[473geo]

2 minutes ago, notmyself said:

 

lol. I must say that you come across as the type who considers work an occupational hazard.

It is , like many things in this world, a means to an end

[williamgeorgeallen]

7 hours ago, giddyup said:

What you have probably seen is some 2 week holiday falang holding hands with a bar girl half his age. I know many expats who have been living here happily with their long time wives or girlfriends, so maybe we mix in different circles.

i owned and ran a family watersports business for 10 years called the blue lagoon. i saw a good cross section of people in my time. i am still a bit surprised how few thai western relationships work long term.

 

Edited March 4, 2017 by williamgeorgeallen

[ericthai]

32 minutes ago, williamgeorgeallen said:

i owned and ran a family watersports business for 10 years called the blue lagoon. i saw a good cross section of people in my time. i am still a bit surprised how few thai western relationships work long term.

 

I've seen the opposite. Sure I have seen a few breaks ups, but most of my friends have been with their wives for 10+ years. However the marriages that worked out are mostly all my old time friends from back in the 90's I think things were different back then, seemed the girls were all looking for an expat husband and they were on good behavior. Sure you had some hard core girls out to just make money and then go home, but others had the dream to find a guy. I think the girls in the bar scene nowadays are more hard core just looking for money. They might start out looking for a boyfriend / husband but after some holiday guys lie to them a few times and break their heart they get hard core and play the money game.  

[atyclb]

6 hours ago, smotherb said:

I think you will find some of the girls actually want a pitiful example of the farang so that the villagers take pity on them and forgive their actions.

 

 

ouch

[atyclb]

8 hours ago, williamgeorgeallen said:

i just finished 10 years in thailand.  my post was based on what i have seen. 'almost'  

 

 

you see you dont realize (missed) the abundance of expats with thai-chinese attorney-physician  gf's and wives.  living in thailand i also almost missed that had i not been reminded by tv posters.

 

interesting how posts such as the one by OP make some very defensive, needing to proclaim the virtue of their own relationship(s)

Edited March 4, 2017 by atyclb

[eldragon]

I gotta take back some of the things I wrote earlier. I'm remembering a handful of times I've met younger village girls with older foreigners. I recall thinking the girl was absolutely stunning. Totally my type with a fun personality. And that I would've been a much better fit for her. I guess I've always wondered where guys meet girls like that. One dude told me he went up north (I'm sure he meant northeast) and approached a girl's parents. Told em he wanted to marry her, take care of her, etc. That's too creepy for me though. If I lived in one of the provinces and had an opportunity to get to know a girl naturally, then maybe.  But the reality for them is there's just not a lot of single farangs up there under 40 or even 50. And anyone who's not desperate for a young piece of ass is gonna realize most of those girls are not as single as they say they are.

[giddyup]

3 hours ago, williamgeorgeallen said:

i owned and ran a family watersports business for 10 years called the blue lagoon. i saw a good cross section of people in my time. i am still a bit surprised how few thai western relationships work long term.

 

Only 50% of western/western relationships work long term. In fact, after a little research, it seems there's quite a few countries where the divorce rate is 60% or higher. So unless you have figures showing it's even higher for Thai/western relationships....?

Edited March 4, 2017 by giddyup

[williamgeorgeallen]

3 hours ago, giddyup said:

Only 50% of western/western relationships work long term. In fact, after a little research, it seems there's quite a few countries where the divorce rate is 60% or higher. So unless you have figures showing it's even higher for Thai/western relationships....?

only what i have seen and from that i  would say the failure rate is far greater than 60%. i can only think of a few thai western couples who have been together over the 10 years i stayed in thailand.

[smotherb]

10 hours ago, 473geo said:

Asian women have children because there is no welfare, the children are their 'insurance' to be looked after in their old age.

Given this scenario it really is not that important if the father sticks around, he is probably just another mouth to feed. Besides as stated above many of the children will spend their formative years being raised by their grand parents while the mother works. So if Papa contributes fine, if not life goes on.

 

Not really anything to do with birdlife!!

 

 

Women have children because of sex; anything else is secondary.

[bbbbooboo]

hmmm.....selective in the Isaan? what planet do you live on?

[williamgeorgeallen]

5 hours ago, atyclb said:

 

 

you see you dont realize (missed) the abundance of expats with thai-chinese attorney-physician  gf's and wives.  living in thailand i also almost missed that had i not been reminded by tv posters.

 

interesting how posts such as the one by OP make some very defensive, needing to proclaim the virtue of their own relationship(s)

maybe couples like that exist but i have never seen them no one i know in thailand has seen them. really i doubt any high end thai girl would want to be seen walking around with a western man.

Edited March 5, 2017 by williamgeorgeallen

[bazza73]

8 hours ago, 473geo said:

No does not, it gives an example why the initial connection is made.......because there can be no doubt there may well come a time, if the relationship is not handled well, when monthly stipend doesn't cut it anymore!

If the falang decides he can do better elsewhere, the fireworks really begin, because the Thai girl/woman is getting dumped back into the rice fields. That's why they can be insanely jealous.

[giddyup]

50 minutes ago, williamgeorgeallen said:

only what i have seen and from that i  would say the failure rate is far greater than 60%. i can only think of a few thai western couples who have been together over the 10 years i stayed in thailand.

So, just a guess, no hard evidence? What about all the Thai ladies that marry a falang and go to live in their country, have any more guesses re success and failures? Like a lot of posters on this forum, all conjecture.

Edited March 5, 2017 by giddyup

[elgenon]

When I read the title I thought the OP was talking about the village girls who get pregnant by their Thai BF when they are very young. The Thai goes on the next girl and then village girl needs to support the baby and later the baby, the parents, the brother. Now how can an uneducated young girl make enough money to do all that?