Single "farang" ladies...

[2unique]

and THIS Western woman, (i.e., yours truly),
is ONLY interested in a THAI boyfriend!!!
i really don't have many other farang friends here, male OR female-
nor do i want any-
unless they actually speak Thai and understand the culture;
otherwise, they're just modern-day colonists  

wOw... you're like my role model ..

I admire the way you keep it real, very different to those men that only want a Thai girlfriend and are rightfully looked down on.

Hope the OP feels nothing but shame and enrolls in some sort of overcompensating class tomorrow. Unless of course there is some sort of cultural thing happening that would delay that.

[smotherb]

1 hour ago, jenifer d said:

i let my Thai friends in the house CONSTANTLY; only thrice (out of hundreds of times)

did anybody attempt to steal from me; once,  a Thai friend called to alert me (she was actually one of the other 2 who had stolen from me -lol) the 2 other times, i caught them

-and nobody has even pretended to steal from me since i gained respect from the locals

in the last 5 years...

You may need to be more aware of who you invite to your house. I have lived overseas most of my life and, yes, I have been stolen from; however, not from those I call friends and invite home.

 

[SiSePuede419]

"Learn the local language. Living anywhere and not speaking the language is going to make it hard to meet locals"

 

It just amazes me how many Farang on TVF just parachute into BKK to "work" (how did they obtain a work permit???) and don't realize the local language is Thai not English.

 

That being said, you'll have exactly the same experience in LA, NYC or any city in the world.

 

Why should locals go to the trouble and effort to make friends with someone who will be gone sooner than later?

 

(This is the attitude of locals in any "high-turnover" city, not mine).

 

That's why I live in a small town (5000 pop.) where it's easier to meet people.  And don't have to deal with the ego-centric attitude ("I live in the biggest, most cut-throat city in <insert country here> therefore I must be THE BEST").

 

NOPE.  SORRY.  WRONG.  5555.

Edited April 13, 2017 by SiSePuede419

[BigKahuna]

1 hour ago, jenifer d said:

i have NO empathy for those who come to LIVE in a foreign country

yet don't bother to even attempt to learn the language-

come on, be as rude as you like!!! 

(PS: obviously, YOU can't HANDLE the TRUTH!!!)

how about a private message flamewar???

i KNOW you don't have a leg to stand on- so go ahead 

I like you. You want to fit in. A lot of foreigners have no intention of fitting in to anything other than a farang situation.

[CharlieH]

Off topic temoved.

 

This not about buddhism, nor discussing other members.

[nuakmuaynina]

Meetups are good, there are loads in BKK for various activities.

 

I would also suggest the activity route.

 

I am 35 and a farang lady, I spend most of my time training in Muay Thai and have met many friends that way, also never short of offers from the men too. Its a total Myth there is no interest in farang ladies in my experience...

[Minnie the Minx]

Single white females in Thailand and the OP has a teenager plenty of things to do and mix in, to me sounds like she wants some friends and male companionship. This also depends on how long you plan to stay in Thailand as to any 'relationship'. 

 

Learning the language definitely so you can get around and communicate. I had plenty of male friends, just treat them as friends and brother types always worked for me then again I've never come across as a needy, desperate femme. Above all have fun, focus on work and connections. Try some embassy dos if you haven't already and expat clubs which some have mentioned.

 

 

[BigKahuna]

Race has nothing to do with it. Depends on looks and attitude.

[Minnie the Minx]

3 hours ago, jenifer d said:

as many Thais will tell you

(and Lord Buddha has affirmed to me personally),

in Buddhism, you are presented w/many options

as to how to find "nirvana" (i.e., enlightenment)

Buddha tells us to explore and adopt the ones that work for us...

and discard those that do not work...

nowhere is it said in actual Buddhist lore to worship him...

....

 

There's a Buddhist forum here somewhere. Cheers.

[Katia]

3 hours ago, jenifer d said:

i have NO empathy for those who come to LIVE in a foreign country

yet don't bother to even attempt to learn the language-

come on, be as rude as you like!!! 

(PS: obviously, YOU can't HANDLE the TRUTH!!!)

how about a private message flamewar???

i KNOW you don't have a leg to stand on- so go ahead 

I'm still trying to find the part of the OP's post where she says she doesn't intend to learn/isn't already learning the language...

[BigKahuna]

2 minutes ago, Katia said:

I'm still trying to find the part of the OP's post where she says she doesn't intend to learn/isn't already learning the language...

She has been there 1 year already and struggling to meet people. Enrolling in a language course should be one of the first things to do. Going to meet other students right away for starters.

[Katia]

She could also be taking private lessons one-on-one with a teacher, learning via Skype, learning on her own at home, etc.  Or perhaps she is taking a class and hasn't hit it off with fellow students.

 

Going off on a huge rant based on a pretty big jump to an assumption that was developed only on the fact that the OP has said she has trouble meeting people??

[BigKahuna]

Just now, Katia said:

She could also be taking private lessons one-on-one with a teacher, learning via Skype, learning on her own at home, etc.  Or perhaps she is taking a class and hasn't hit it off with fellow students.

 

Going off on a huge rant based on a pretty big jump to an assumption that was developed only on the fact that the OP has said she has trouble meeting people??

Who is ranting?

[Katia]

Just now, BigKahuna said:

Who is ranting?

Go back and read my first post, and the post that is quoted in it.

[CharlieH]

Troll post removed.

 

9) You will not post inflammatory messages on the forum, or attempt to disrupt discussions to upset its participants, or trolling. Trolling can be defined as the act of purposefully antagonizing other people on the internet by posting controversial, inflammatory, irrelevant or off-topic messages with the primary intent of provoking other users into an emotional response or to generally disrupt normal on-topic discussion.
 

[BigKahuna]

Other people are entitled to opinions and she was talking about foreigners in general.

[Stevemercer]

'they do NOT want COLONIAL OPRESSORS who are fine with making tons of MONEY here but don't bother to learn the language't

 

Implicit in the above quote is that if you speak Thai, it is OK to make tons of money, scam people or just be a jerk - at least you are not a colonial oppressor?

 

I think the OP is on track. Sure, you need to get out and about for opportunities to socialise and meet new people. It's just a matter of finding a few connections (and some are suggested in posts) and time.

[Minnie the Minx]

If anybody else has a teenager I'm sure the lady in question is run off her feet. 

 

The main thing here is to socialize in the context of having a teen, make friends who have same age kids, enjoy the life and don't put so much pressure on yourself. 

 

Anyway the lady hasn't been back and there are many very good suggestions here.

[Khon Kaen Dave]

6 hours ago, jenifer d said:

maybe Phuket, Samui, Hua Hin- 

or areas of Bkk w/large expat populations

(since she did not state that she wanted to meet Thai locals;

a big red flag to me, since it it'ss obvious she is too lazy/arrogant/colonial-minded to bother to learn the local language and culture and customs)

 

and yes, maybe i AM saying to ALL of you who do NOT bother to learn Thai

(let alone the culture & customs):

YOU who think that the Thais do NOT want us here?

they do NOT want COLONIAL OPRESSORS who are fine with making tons of MONEY here but don't bother to learn the language

Ohhh,its easy then. Just learn a bit of Thai, and you'll be loved and invited to all the Thai parites

Thais tolerate us here, and the sooner you understand that,the more easier you will see it.They don't even understand the meaning if colonial oppressors, they are too busy being oppressed by their own people.

[StreetCowboy]

Have you tried the "Ladies in Thailand" sub-forum?

I'm slightly surprised this thread has not been moved there - I would expect much more helpful and constructive replies from other ladies who may have gone through the same issues

 

https://www.thaivisa.com/forum/forum/15-ladies-in-thailand/

 

SC

[abab]

And I guess that the problem is others ? Certainly !

 

 

[geisha]

Any Hash House Harriers  in Bangkok ? Used to be great on Phuket !!!!

 

[kalidescopemind]

If you like to meet Thai people, you can visit your favorite WATS!  My favorite was Wat Yananwa, by the river.   Your local nice one is best.  They love it when farangs visit, and the English speaking Thais will come to you and offer you books on Buddha.  You can go to retreats where they are masters of teaching meditation.  A lot of farang men think it is phony, but it most certainly isn't.  You can nitpick any religion, but there are many devout Thai women and they take it very seriously.  It is where THEY socialize.   You will be accepted into Thailand this way, and they will love to teach you proper ceremony AND the Thai language.   If you hang out in bars, they will think you an alcoholic farang.  :)   I did both, so I they put tp with me.  My wife is very devout, and it helped me get along in Thailand tremendously, and its helped her acclimate to Sacramento CA, where she has found lots of friends.

[Suradit69]

On 4/11/2017 at 11:50 PM, eldragon said:

I suggest cooking.

... or maybe sewing or churning butter.

 

On 4/11/2017 at 11:50 PM, eldragon said:

In case you haven't noticed, many of us enjoy the local women.

The jury is out on whether or not the enjoyment is unilateral or mutual.

I expect the O/P is bearing up after learning that "us" aren't available.

 

15 hours ago, 12DrinkMore said:

"just get back in the kitchen and clear off"???

Apparently some still think that "barefoot and pregnant" is part of Nature's plan.

[eldragon]

6 hours ago, Suradit69 said:

... or maybe sewing or churning butter.

 

The jury is out on whether or not the enjoyment is unilateral or mutual.

I expect the O/P is bearing up after learning that "us" aren't available.

 

Apparently some still think that "barefoot and pregnant" is part of Nature's plan.

 

Geeze, people can't even enjoy cooking their own food anymore without being called a sexist bigot. What a great world we live in now.

[KenKadz]

On 4/13/2017 at 1:34 PM, dick dasterdly said:

Unable to find a 'roll eyes' emoticon, I'll settle for .

I'm glad you were impressed.

[2unique]

Getting a better understanding of why the OP doesn't make friends.. .

[FruitPudding]

On Thursday, April 13, 2017 at 9:10 AM, 12DrinkMore said:

In summary,

 

"just get back in the kitchen and clear off"???

Lol. 

 

It did sound like he said that.

 

To be honest, as much as I find the "local women" attractive, the longer I stay here I more I appreciate my western ex-GFs.

[12DrinkMore]

15 hours ago, FruitPudding said:

Lol. 

 

It did sound like he said that.

 

To be honest, as much as I find the "local women" attractive, the longer I stay here I more I appreciate my western ex-GFs.

 

That is the "absence makes the heart grow fonder" fallacy.

 

You only remember the best bits and expand those. The harsh reality would come back with a vengeance if you made the mistake of going back to them.

 

Especially if they had aged say ten years in the meantime.........

[dick dasterdly]

8 minutes ago, 12DrinkMore said:

 

That is the "absence makes the heart grow fonder" fallacy.

 

You only remember the best bits and expand those. The harsh reality would come back with a vengeance if you made the mistake of going back to them.

 

Especially if they had aged say ten years in the meantime.........

True to a certain extent.  (Don't forget that you too would have aged ten years in the meantime and possibly  realise that you are also far less attractive.)

 

My (limited) experience is that some Western men miss intelligent conversation with a Western woman and try to continue as 'friends' after moving onto a local woman and/or are happy to meet other Western women with whom they can become friends.

 

But this is WAY off topic from the original OP.