Attacked With A Cleaver

[kerryk]

For one and a half years we lived happily in Chiang Mai. Five months ago we moved to Pattaya and she changed from a nice housewife to a raging drunken Thai boyfriend keeping 37 year old Go Go dancer. She needed a 400% increase in money to keep her Thai boyfriend who is 15 years her junior.

She stops dancing and going short time with Farangs about 4 AM and goes to Thai night clubs where she gets drunk and dances till 8 AM.

She comes home and yells at me sometime between 8 AM and Noon.

Twice she has attacked me with a knife and a cleaver.

A couple of weeks ago she broke my toe in three places with a thrown bottle of Listerine.

I retained a lawyer and he told me it was better for me to do a runner than try and kick her out.

My lease expires at the end of this month and I was going to leave shortly before it expired.

I met an American doctor last night and while discussing my situation he freaked out when I told him I suspected she had me drugged and stole my passport which she later sold back to me for 5,000 baht and claimed she had found the thief and bought it back from her.

He told me that he suspected when she found out I was really leaving she would have a friend slap her face bruising it so it looked like I had beat her up.

He claimed this happened to him and he was arrested and kept in a Thai jail for 90 days without bail. He further stated that when the US embassy found out the charge was spousal abuse (even though he was not married to her) that they would not help him in the least.

I am 60 years old. My GF is as big as I am and 20 years younger. Would anyone really believe I could hit her even if I wanted to.

I have never hit anyone let alone a woman. I am a gentle man not inclined to violence in the least.

I am sure there are many here that are wiser than I. Is it really that easy to have me put in jail for 90 days which might be a death sentence for me?

[sbk]

Kerry, just leave now. Before she has an inkling that you are going. Disappear while she is out working. And go somewhere far away from Pattaya or CM. She would know where to find you in those places.

[jumnien]

Run, Kerry, Run!!!

[taxexile]

its definately time to go time , in fact you should have left yesterday!

perhaps its time to find and settle down with someone of your own age.

[dee123]

good luck kerryk.......unfortunately its time to make plans,have you any trusted friends in thai.....now is the time you need them......if not you might have to ride this storm......but please live and learn......and please note all others who are considering rushing in where angels fear to tread.......keep in touch....dee123

[Vespa]

For one and a half years we lived happily in Chiang Mai. Five months ago we moved to Pattaya and she changed from a nice housewife to a raging drunken Thai boyfriend keeping 37 year old Go Go dancer. She needed a 400% increase in money to keep her Thai boyfriend who is 15 years her junior.

She stops dancing and going short time with Farangs about 4 AM and goes to Thai night clubs where she gets drunk and dances till 8 AM.

She comes home and yells at me sometime between 8 AM and Noon.

Twice she has attacked me with a knife and a cleaver.

A couple of weeks ago she broke my toe in three places with a thrown bottle of Listerine.

I retained a lawyer and he told me it was better for me to do a runner than try and kick her out.

My lease expires at the end of this month and I was going to leave shortly before it expired.

I met an American doctor last night and while discussing my situation he freaked out when I told him I suspected she had me drugged and stole my passport which she later sold back to me for 5,000 baht and claimed she had found the thief and bought it back from her.

He told me that he suspected when she found out I was really leaving she would have a friend slap her face bruising it so it looked like I had beat her up.

He claimed this happened to him and he was arrested and kept in a Thai jail for 90 days without bail. He further stated that when the US embassy found out the charge was spousal abuse (even though he was not married to her) that they would not help him in the least.

I am 60 years old. My GF is as big as I am and 20 years younger. Would anyone really believe I could hit her even if I wanted to.

I have never hit anyone let alone a woman. I am a gentle man not inclined to violence in the least.

I am sure there are many here that are wiser than I. Is it really that easy to have me put in jail for 90 days which might be a death sentence for me?

If you did not have many posts to your credit , I'd think you were a troll

after reading the above.

[calibanjr.]

Don't know what your visa/residency status is, but out of Thailand altogether is probably something you might look at.

[Nawtilus]

Take a file to all the knives in the house tonight.

[khunandy]

I met an American doctor last night and while discussing my situation he freaked out when I told him I suspected she had me drugged and stole my passport which she later sold back to me for 5,000 baht and claimed she had found the thief and bought it back from her.

He told me that he suspected when she found out I was really leaving she would have a friend slap her face bruising it so it looked like I had beat her up.

Kerry,

Get out of this now mate, dont look behind and save yourself.

She can <deleted> you up in so many ways and if she suspects her cash cow is about to dry up ...watch out!!!!

Your lawyer friend is right I have witnessed this behavour first hand.

Andy

[Ulysses G.]

Please don't tell us what bar she works in. She sounds just like my type!

[Grover]

you are outgunned and outsmarted, just pack your bag and go.

[richardb]

Kerry ,

Read your post and take a breath. You need to make a paradigm shift in your behaviour. Good bye old Kerry hello new Kerry. You are the victim of abuse and have fallen into a pattern of abusive behaviour you would never have tolerated in the past. I note in a previous post you have military connections in Thailand going back 35 years. Are you e-service? Would you have tolerated one of your unit kicking you in the balls and flushing your head down the toilet. hel_l NO. I agree that as a general principle I do not hit women but if one goes at me with a cleaver?

Mate this is not normal. Find the old you then get out or kick out. hel_l it might even be payback time.

Richard

[Robski]

Don't make a scene, wait til she goes to work and then leave. In the meantime stay away from the balcony.

[Pattaya_Fox]

Kerry whatever you had with this woman has long gone. In her eyes you have now become the enemy who is trying to stop her from living her new found lifestyle.....you owe her nothing.

You now have to look after yourself and get yourself into a situation where you have peace of mind and you don`t have to be looking over your shoulder all the time.

The sooner you depart the better as she is now dangerous. Wait whilst she is out and gather your things and go. Be careful not to tell anyone where you are going or she may just turn up. Good luck!

[MisterFingers]

Here's what I would do, and I'm not saying this is necessarily good advice for you.

I would wait until she goes out tonight. Then I would go out myself and pick up a woman. I would make sure that woman was in bed with me when she got home.

This might jar some reality into her. You might even gain her respect this way. She knocks you around because she doesn't respect you because you let her knock you around.

If she sees you in bed with another woman, that cycle will break. And you also have a witness just in case she thinks of something bright.

And make sure the woman is much more beautiful than her.

And for Christ sake, put everything you have of value in a safety deposit box.

[gburns57au]

two choices....

Treat her like a thai would treat her....and yes I mean slap her around and show her you wont take 5hit....

If you cant do that then get the he11 out of there....

I dont usually condone violence against women....but this would seem to be an extreme case....Maybe this has happened because you have been too soft and she knows that she can take you for a ride. You need to take control....posting here shows that you are at the last resort stage.

Edited January 30, 2007 by gburns57au

[Pattaya_Fox]

Here's what I would do, and I'm not saying this is necessarily good advice for you.

I would wait until she goes out tonight. Then I would go out myself and pick up a woman. I would make sure that woman was in bed with me when she got home.

This might jar some reality into her. You might even gain her respect this way. She knocks you around because she doesn't respect you because you let her knock you around.

If she sees you in bed with another woman, that cycle will break. And you also have a witness just in case she thinks of something bright.

And make sure the woman is much more beautiful than her.

And for Christ sake, put everything you have of value in a safety deposit box.

She`s already attacked him with a knife and a cleaver........if she found him like this she`d probably chop off his todger

[richardb]

Here's what I would do, and I'm not saying this is necessarily good advice for you.

I would wait until she goes out tonight. Then I would go out myself and pick up a woman. I would make sure that woman was in bed with me when she got home.

Sir you have bigger conjoles than I do.

Have you ever tried this tactic

Richard

[britmaveric]

[midas]

Here's what I would do, and I'm not saying this is necessarily good advice for you.

I would wait until she goes out tonight. Then I would go out myself and pick up a woman. I would make sure that woman was in bed with me when she got home.

This might jar some reality into her. You might even gain her respect this way. She knocks you around because she doesn't respect you because you let her knock you around.

If she sees you in bed with another woman, that cycle will break. And you also have a witness just in case she thinks of something bright.

And make sure the woman is much more beautiful than her.

And for Christ sake, put everything you have of value in a safety deposit box.

bad advice !!!!!!!!!!!! she could freak out and do ANYTHING

[richardb]

I am sure there are many here that are wiser than I. Is it really that easy to have me put in jail for 90 days which might be a death sentence for me?

Sorry to post twice but Kerry jail is not the issue. You cannot be held to ransom blackmailed threatened and harmed by anyone. Sorry its all gone bad but do not get run out of Thailand cause of one psycho witch. Take your life back. If you can not confont her find someone who can. Can not one of the tourist police members help this guy.

Richard

[Mobi]

Keerry, most of the advice here is good, and I agree with Richard, it is not necessary to leave Thailand.

However, if you can leave the country for a while, it might be better.

The only thing I will add is that you've put up with it this long, so few more days won't hurt too much.

You have to go, but plan it properly. Decide where you are going to go, how you are going to get there, and make the necessary bookings - hotels, - whatever, if only just for the first few days.

Make a list of all the things to take with you. This will obviously include your valuables, but might also include all your personal papers, anything that might help her to find you, like addresses, phone numbers of friends or family. Also any papers related to your finances. Make sure you leave nothing behind that she can use to her advantage - in any way.

You might want to consider closing your bank accounts and opening new one(s) at a different bank.

I strongly recommend that you cancel your phone and buy a new sim card. If it is a contract account, just removce the sim, and buy a 'pay as you go' one.

It is vitally important to sever absolutely all contact, and leave her no opportunity to contact you either directly or through a mutual acquaintance. Believe you me, she will try - very very hard, and you must avoid all her efforts to speak to you. If you ever agree to speak - even to tell her f..ck off, she will see it as a sign of weakness and she will never give up. Silence and a disappearing act are by far the best way of closing this very unfortunate chapter in your life.

Take a day or two, and plan it all very carefully, devoid of emotion.

Good luck - it's never too late to start again

Mobi

Edited January 30, 2007 by Mobi D'Ark

[lannarebirth]

Here's what I would do, and I'm not saying this is necessarily good advice for you.

I would wait until she goes out tonight. Then I would go out myself and pick up a woman. I would make sure that woman was in bed with me when she got home.

This might jar some reality into her. You might even gain her respect this way. She knocks you around because she doesn't respect you because you let her knock you around.

If she sees you in bed with another woman, that cycle will break. And you also have a witness just in case she thinks of something bright.

And make sure the woman is much more beautiful than her.

And for Christ sake, put everything you have of value in a safety deposit box.

My friend, that is some poor advice to be giveng someone involved witha knife/cleaver wielder. Here's what you do Kerry. Visit Lao, starting tomorrow.

[pumpuiman]

I would write a letter detailing all your experiences and worries about being falsely accused of a crime.

Make several copies, date and sign them.

Secure a number of witnesses statements (in writing) that can attest to her state of health at the time of your departure.( I would suggest offering a policeman cash in return for his statement)

Present copies of your letter and witness statements to the tourist police, a lawyer, and any influential friends.

Cover your ass. Then get as far away as you can.

You will have written dated proof, and witnesses if she tries to make trouble.

Good luck.

[Tarqin]

Kerry my friend your life is in danger.

Do not trust any Thai as they will always chose her over you.

Tonight and I mean TONIGHT wait until she leaves for work and then do NOT pack a bag grab your passport and any credit cards debit cards bank books and any documentation related thereto saunter out of the house casually as if going for a beer get a baht bus to Second Road and then grab the first taxi meter you see and tell him Bangkok pronto.

Check in to an out of the way hotel in Bangkok and over the next few days close every bank account you have and cancel any plastic your have and take out new with different banks. She have may copies of cards and other documents and can and will walk in to any bank and extract your money by spinning them a line even if she has no signing rights to the accounts, yes this can happen.

Then leave Thailand if you can for at least a month. If not or you don't want to then go anywhere in Thailand except Chang Mai or Pattaya which you can never enter again.

I am not joking on any of this. If she gets wind your leaving you will likely die that night you may even be in similar danger if you do not.

Take this very very serious I do not want to see your body on Pattaya News.

[Humphrey Bear]

Firstly, clear out your bank account when you can.

Secondly, pack your bags when she goes to work and head for a B&B near Sukhumvit and Pattaya Klang.

Next morning be on the East side of Sukhumvit before six in the morning, catch a 72 (or is it 74?? - long time since I've done this) and go all the way South to Trat.

Catch the small bus there that takes you to the Cambodian border at Koh Kong.

Cross the border.

Go to one of the semi-decent hotels, such as Rasmi Makara (probably got the name wrong - I stayed in the really crappy places) and catch the fast boat to Sihanoukville (Snooky) next morning.

Put your baggage down in Snooky, take a deep breath, look around and smell the freedom.

Find some digs and a nice Khmer girl, settle down and live a good life.

Best of luck

Edited January 30, 2007 by Humphrey Bear

[besth]

I would write a letter detailing all your experiences and worries about being falsely accused of a crime.

Make several copies, date and sign them.

Secure a number of witnesses statements (in writing) that can attest to her state of health at the time of your departure.( I would suggest offering a policeman cash in return for his statement)

Present copies of your letter and witness statements to the tourist police, a lawyer, and any influential friends.

Cover your ass. Then get as far away as you can.

You will have written dated proof, and witnesses if she tries to make trouble.

Good luck.

I think this would be a very dangerous move.

It is a good idea, but more than likely it would take long enough for her to find out what you were planning and someone will leak the information to her if you start to do that.

As an alternative, less effective legally, but a lot safer for you, the day you are ready to leave, if you have a digital camera, take her picture. Digital cameras record the date and time (if you can get a newspaper of the day and a clock in the background, that would be even better, but do not try to force it, because she will suspect something).

Then ask people to take pics of you at different places in the following hours during your "run for your life". When she gets home and does not find you, she may decide to get someone to bit her up and go to the police, but you would have a strong proof of your inocence. This is Thailand and all that, but she is no angel and police's patience has a limit too.

If what you wrote is accurate, as Tarqin says, your life is in danger.

The sooner you get out of there, the better, but you hopefully can plan it carefully.

DO NOT leave the place where you stay with a suitcase, big bag or anything that clearly shows you are leaving.

DO NOT leave personal documents behind that can help her to trace you or your money.

If you need to take more things with you that would fit in a small back-pack or, preferably, a couple of supermarket bags, think if you have the time to rent a cheap room in some hotel/guest-house for a few days and move those things there, one or two supermarket bags at a time. If you do this, unless you have your own car, self-driven, or motorcycle, DO NOT go straight from your home to the place where you have the room, even if it is on a baht bus (the local motorcycle taxis are out of the question for more than obvious reasons).

If you think you have to carry with you enough things that will require some sort of suitcase, buy one somewhere as close as possible to wherever you get that room, the same day you are ready to leave. Then pack, get into the first Bangkok taxi you can find and, as someone suggested, ask him to drive you to a hotel there.

Best would be to go to a low-profile 3/4 stars one. Get in there, but DO NOT check in. Go to the cafeteria a restaurant... Spend at least 1 hour there. Then go out to the street and take a taxi (not one of the ones always waiting in front of hotels, they could be used to trace your steps). Go to another hotel of the same style somewhere else and take it from there.

Leaving Thailand for a while or not, up to you. I don't think you need to, but don't go back to Chiang Mai. Bangkok is big enough, but if you don't like it, try somewhere new where you haven't ever been with her before.

Assume that at some point, during the time you have been together, she has had access to your financial information, at least in Thailand (abroad there isn't much she can do to harm you, even if she has the information). Change bank accounts and cards here.

Whatever you do, as Moby says "It is vitally important to sever absolutely all contact, and leave her no opportunity to contact you either directly or through a mutual acquaintance. Believe you me, she will try - very very hard, and you must avoid all her efforts to speak to you. If you ever agree to speak - even to tell her f..ck off, she will see it as a sign of weakness and she will never give up. Silence and a disappearing act are by far the best way of closing this very unfortunate chapter in your life."

Stop using your mobile the second you leave. Buy two pay-as-you-go SIM cards. If you must tell someone that you have left and you are OK, try to do it by email. If you must speak to someone on the phone, use always the same SIM, but tell them they can't call you. Keep the other one always with you, "virgin" (unused), for the event of a very unlikely emergency.

I've read on the thread that you have a military background. Use your brain and be disciplined and you should be fine. Once you're gone, if you do it right, there isn't really anything she can do about it.

Let us know that you're gone and you're fine, when you have done it, but do not give us any details.

Good luck.

[Lucifer]

Firstly, clear out your bank account when you can.

Secondly, pack your bags when she goes to work and head for a B&B near Sukhumvit and Pattaya Klang.

Next morning be on the East side of Sukhumvit before six in the morning, catch a 72 (or is it 74?? - long time since I've done this) and go all the way South to Trat.

Catch the small bus there that takes you to the Cambodian border at Koh Kong.

Cross the border.

Go to one of the semi-decent hotels, such as Rasmi Makara (probably got the name wrong - I stayed in the really crappy places) and catch the fast boat to Sihanoukville (Snooky) next morning.

Put your baggage down in Snooky, take a deep breath, look around and smell the freedom.

Find some digs and a nice Khmer girl, settle down and live a good life.

Best of luck

Great advice for a lot of people who need a break.

kerry, you sealed your fate the minute you let her strick you.

Leg it mate, and don't look back.

The reply before this one is excellent. Take his advice.

[RoueLeJour]

Lots of good advice being given here, I would add two things:

Once you have got away from this woman for a couple of days your head will clear and it will be easier to do the stuff you need to do.

Don't be overly afraid of the police. When a woman set a tame policeman on me all he wanted to do was negociate a "divorce settlement". I hope it never comes to this, but just stay calm and remember nobody profits by you going to jail. Money number one.

I'm only a newbie here, but I can see you are among friends, remember that.

[Mobi]

kerry, There is alot of good advice here.

Only you can judge the situation, but whether you just leave with essentials, or pack a big suitcase, it will make no difference - she will know you have gone. As long as you are in a bus, or a taxi out of Pattaya by the time she comes home you should be OK.

I am guessing - again only you know - but I doesn't sound as though you are in imminient danger of being harmed, as long as you keep your distance and don't provoke her. Therefor take your time. As I say, only you can make a judgement on this - you know her behaviour.

I don't think it is a good idea to do all this witness stuff - it may all work against you. Don't trust anyone, and don't tell anyone you are leaving. Once you are far away, it's going to be difficult for her to make any charges stick. The only thing you could consider is to retain a lawyer at the place you end up in (assuming you are still in Thailand), and make a statement to him and get him to acknowledge the dates that you met with him).

Dates on camers can be maniplulated and re-set - I don't think it will prove anything.

I recommend that no-one else makes suggestions on where Kerry should go to hole out. The bitch might get access to TV and use it as a starting point to find him.

If possible, could the current suggestions of places to go be edited out? - or in due course maybe the whole thread should be deleted. These women are cunning and are not stupid- particularly if they have just lost their ATM.