WorriedNoodle Posted October 20, 2020 Share Posted October 20, 2020 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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Popular Post ballpoint Posted October 20, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted October 20, 2020 I bought my friend an elephant for his room. He said, "Thanks". I said, "Don't mention it". 2 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post ballpoint Posted October 20, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted October 20, 2020 When marijuana is legalised in Scotland: 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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ballpoint Posted October 20, 2020 Share Posted October 20, 2020 How do you save a bagpiper from drowning? Take your foot off his head. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patman30 Posted October 20, 2020 Share Posted October 20, 2020 "it will only be for 30 days...." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post fasteddie Posted October 20, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted October 20, 2020 A man walked into the produce section of his local ALDI supermarket and asked to buy half a head of lettuce. The boy working in that department told him that they only sold whole heads of lettuce. The man was insistent that the boy ask the manager about the matter. Walking into the back room, the boy said to the manager, "Some old <deleted> outside wants to buy half a head of lettuce." As he finished his sentence, he turned around to find that the man had followed and was standing right behind him, so the boy quickly added, "and this gentleman kindly offered to buy the other half." The manager approved the deal and the man went on his... way. Later, the manager said to the boy........... "I was impressed with the way you got yourself out of that situation earlier, we like people who can think on their feet here, where are you from son?" "New Zealand, sir," the boy replied. "Why did you leave New Zealand ?" the manager asked. The boy said, "Sir, there's nothing but prostitutes and rugby players there." "Is that right?" replied the manager, "My wife is from New Zealand!" "Really?" replied the boy, "Who did she play for?" 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roo860 Posted October 20, 2020 Share Posted October 20, 2020 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WorriedNoodle Posted October 21, 2020 Share Posted October 21, 2020 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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fangless Posted October 21, 2020 Share Posted October 21, 2020 7 hours ago, WorriedNoodle said: Don't get me Gogh(ing) again! 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fangless Posted October 21, 2020 Share Posted October 21, 2020 7 hours ago, WorriedNoodle said: Red sky at night, shepherd’s delight. Blue sky at night, day Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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fangless Posted October 21, 2020 Share Posted October 21, 2020 (edited) Heaven sent-Two priests were playing golf... Father Bob hit his ball into the woods on his first swing, "Damn it! That totally missed!" he cursed. "You shouldn't curse Father Bob!" said Father Michael "Or god might punish you!" Father Bob apologized and they went on playing. On his next swing, Father Bob hit his ball into the sand pit. "Damn it! That totally missed!" he cursed again. Again, Father Michael warned, "Do not utter such words Father Bob, lest god punishes you for it!" Father Bob apologized again and they continued playing. On his third swing, Father Bob hit his ball into the pond. "Damn it! That totally missed!" cursed Father Bob once again. Before Father Michael could say anything, a ominous dark cloud suddenly gathered out of the blue sky and a vicious lightning came down and stroke Father Michael, killing him instantly. Father Bob was completely stunned, before he could understand what was happening in front of him, he heard a thunderous deep voice coming from the sky - "Damn it! That totally missed!" Edited October 21, 2020 by fangless 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silencer Posted October 21, 2020 Share Posted October 21, 2020 Heard January 31st, 2019 at 2400 hours...... "Happy New Year". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fangless Posted October 21, 2020 Share Posted October 21, 2020 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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