2 minutes ago, ballpoint said:

An open door toilet?

"Start! Ya b*stard!"

 

What is 6.9?
A good thing ruined by a period.

Little Johnny comes down to breakfast.
Because they live on a farm, his mother inquires if he has completed his tasks.
“Not yet,” Little Johnny said.
His mother forbids him from eating breakfast until he completes his responsibilities.
He’s a little irritated, so he goes to feed the chickens and kicks one of them.
He goes to feed the cows and kicks one of them.
He goes to feed the pigs and kicks one of them.
He returns to the kitchen for breakfast, and his mother serves him a bowl of dry cereal.
“What happened to the eggs and bacon? Why is there no milk in my cereal?” he inquires.
“Well, I saw you kick a chicken, so you don’t get any eggs for a week,” his mother replies. “I saw you kick the pig, therefore you’re out of bacon for a week as well. I also saw you kick the cow, so you won’t be getting milk for a week.”
His father arrives for breakfast and kicks the cat halfway across the kitchen.
Little Johnny looks up at his mother with a smile, and says: “Are you going to tell him, or should I?”

Very slimming dress madam.

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The Average American wedding