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Worst Joke Ever 2026

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3 hours ago, fangless said:

The Lone Ranger and Tonto were traveling through a canyon when they encountered fifty Indian warriors up ahead.

They turned around and there were a hundred more coming from the rear.

They looked up, and on either side of the canyon walls were hordes of <deleted> off Indians.

The Lone Ranger said to Tonto, "Well old friend, I guess there's not much we can do."

 

Tonto said, "What do you mean WE; white boy?" 

That is older than when Pontius was a trainee pilot.

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2 hours ago, WorriedNoodle said:

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What a terrifying sight to see when you open the door.

2 minutes ago, billd766 said:

What a terrifying sight to see when you open the door.

How dare you!

Letters to 'Worst joke ever'

 

As exercise causes you to use more oxygen, produce more carbon dioxide and heat from your body stop going to fitness classes and do your bit to reduce global warming.

Signed

Armchair Stan.

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55 minutes ago, billd766 said:

That is older than when Pontius was a trainee pilot.

The original dates from when Centurion was a rank and not a tank.

2 hours ago, billd766 said:

That is older than when Pontius was a trainee pilot.

Since i take it you wrote down his dictation of it can you confirm it is accurate!

2 hours ago, billd766 said:

What a terrifying sight to see when you open the door.

it certainly wouldn't even warm your heart!

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DIARY ON A CRUISE SHIP 

 

DEAR DIARY : DAY 1.
All packed for the cruise ship -- all my sexiest dresses and make-up. Really excited.

 

DEAR DIARY : DAY 2.
Entire day at sea, beautiful and saw whales and dolphins.
Met the Captain today ~ seems like a very nice man.

 

DEAR DIARY : DAY 3.
At the pool today. Also some shuffle boarding and hit golf balls off the deck.
Captain invited me to join him at his table for dinner.
Felt honoured and had a wonderful time. He is very attractive and attentive.

 

DEAR DIARY : DAY 4.
Won $800 in the ship's casino. 
Captain asked me to have dinner with him in his own cabin. 
Had a luxurious meal complete with caviar and champagne.
He asked me to stay the night but I declined. Told him I could not be unfaithful to my husband.

 

DEAR DIARY : DAY 5.
Pool again today, got sun burnt, and went inside to drink at piano bar for rest of day.
Captain saw me, bought me several large drinks. He really is charming. 


Again asked me to visit his cabin for the night. Again I declined. 
 He told me if I did not let him have his way with me he would sink the ship. 
I was shocked.


DEAR DIARY : DAY 6.
Today I saved 1600 lives.
TWICE !!! 

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24 minutes ago, ravip said:

DEAR DIARY : DAY 6.

DEAR DIARY : DAY 7

Berthed in Liverpool docks, discovered I have been on board the Mersey ferry all week!

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6 hours ago, ballpoint said:

How dare you!

That is more scary than any Halloween trick or treater.

3 hours ago, fangless said:

Since i take it you wrote down his dictation of it can you confirm it is accurate!

Even I am not that old and it was in Latin which fortunately was not a subject at my school.

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