Why do TVF Expats so dislike other expats?

[jesimps]

I agree with the OP, especially the last para. All you have to do is wait for the anti-farang replies from the usual suspects. Their names crop up repeatedly, especially in threads concerning the new immigration rules, slagging off their fellow foreigners and praising the Thais to high heaven. I could post several culprits on here, but I won't because it's so obvious who they are. I don't pretend to know what's wrong with these people, but they definitely have a personality disorder and are bucking the natural way of things.

[Kieran00001]

16 hours ago, sanemax said:

They usually have two identical bottles side by side , one with alcohol and the other with water , the "jerk" was probably right about getting ripped off

 

In the UK if you buy the barmaid a drink they often say they'll have it later and just pocket the money, no one considers themselves ripped off as their intention was to tip the barmaid not ply her with alcohol.

[BritManToo]

1 minute ago, Kieran00001 said:

In the UK if you buy the barmaid a drink they often say they'll have it later and just pocket the money, no one considers themselves ripped off as their intention was to tip the barmaid not ply her with alcohol.

Here, you just buy the barmaid and have her later.

[quandow]

16 hours ago, Essex Reject said:

It's because 99% of TV 'members' are houllier than thou.

That's spelled "holier" and I just helped make your point.

????

[Kadilo]

9 hours ago, bwpage3 said:

Asset to the kingdom? Really?

 

If expats were assets to the Kingdom it would be pretty easy to get a long term VISA with no 90 day reporting.

 

Too many expats think they are an asset, when it actuality they are not.

 

Wishful thinking.

Still missing the place then

[kingstonkid]

oP it is not expats that are despised it is the faring tourist that wakes up and has a  beer for breakfast and thinks hat he is better than the Thai 

[Sealbash]

The only thing that got my farang wife off was the removal of any limits on her charge card.

My wife doesn’t realize it is a credit card limit. She thinks it is a target.


Sent from my iPad using Thailand Forum - Thaivisa mobile app

[Kieran00001]

1 hour ago, Spidey said:

Close but no cigar. Pretty much equal numbers actually. 2 million indigenous Moslems + 2 million immigrant Moslems.

 

Are you sure?  From I can see from the figures the population has grown ten times faster than net migration  increase, the Muslim population growth alone is faster than net migration levels, by the official figures it doesn't appear to be possible that the doubling of the Muslim population over the past two decades could be due to immigration.

[newnative]

   I think the great majority of the ex-pats are much as the OP described himself--I know I am and all of my friends would more or less fit his description, as well.  Most of us are partnered in long-term relationships.  We are living ordinary, normal lives, much the same as we would be living in our home countries--just with better weather and at a lower cost.  I wasn't a party-all-night, drunk in the gutter guy in the US and I didn't suddenly become one when I moved here.  

    Any place will have its share of undesirables.  Unfortunately, these are the types that often get the news coverage, followed by lots of commentary.  Meanwhile, the rest of us quietly go about our lives, appearing in the news maybe at our birth and our passing.

     

[elgenon]

18 hours ago, marcusarelus said:

I was sitting in a bar having a beer.  An expat that I'd seen before bought the bartender a drink.  She took out a bottle and poured herself a shot and drank it and added 150 baht to the guys bill.  He went on for 30 minutes that the liquid in the bottle was not booze and he'd been ripped off. 

 

I'd had a drink from the same bottle an hour before and it was Thai whiskey.  I knew the bartender for 5 years and she was a nice lady and never ripped off anyone.  I'd only slept with her once so it wasn't an emotional attachment. 

 

The guy was a jerk who thought he knew something about Thai women but he had not a clue. 

 

I find for the most part expats are jerks and I walk to the other side of the street to avoid them. 

I have kind of a problem with a BG ordering an expensive tequila shot and gets a glass that holds a couple drops. I know to her it is the money I pay that's important to her. But I feel I should at least get a BG who is feeling good. No it doesn't make me crazy and I understand all that booze and still cola is not good for the cuties. A girl I like a lot orders a bit of beer. I offered to buy her a real beer on the way home but she said she has to return to dance so it's not a good idea. Again, I understand but...

I guess it really shouldn't matter to the guy whether it's water or whisky because it is the money she gets that counts to her (mostly, maybe) but I understand.

[wwest5829]

I remember upon first retiring to Chiang Mai, I was told that many expat males were either, "Mercenaries, Missionaries or Misfits". I suppose I could describe myself as a member of the latter but only because those who would come to live in a country, not their own, are a minority. I have been fortunate in having, and desiring only a few farang expat acquaintances. My interaction is satisfied by association with the Chiang Mai Expats who I find, for the most part, good people.

[BritManToo]

27 minutes ago, newnative said:

Most of us are partnered in long-term relationships.  We are living ordinary, normal lives, much the same as we would be living in our home countries

I also live a normal life with my rented girlfriend.

But in my home country, the payment for her company wasn't quite so obvious, and the girl wasn't quite so young.

Edited March 11, 2019 by BritManToo

[OzMan]

Suppressed self-loathing. Grouch Marx once said: Please accept my resignation. I don’t care to belong to any club that will have me as a member.

[jvs]

13 hours ago, marcusarelus said:

Wife works at a factory

I am speechless.

[elgenon]

Anyone who assumes expats are jerks probably puts themselves in situations where that is true. At least they know they are not jerks.

 

Maybe an expat who, for instance, joins a group which is involved with a temple's activities would meet a different sort. Just musing mind you. My personal experience in gyms is that the real gym rats are, on the whole, nice guys to talk to and are respectful and helpful and mind the social norms of being in a gym. That's just me. Your mileage may vary.

[metempsychotic]

Thaivisa has nothing to do with my real life, and there is very little chance I will actually meet any of the regular posters here while I am living that life. 

 

Retirement communities are often fraught with bitterness. Why should this one be any different?

 

Get out amongst other people living and working or doing business in thailand, especially in bangkok, do physical activities like, golf, kitsurf, wakeboard, dive. 

 

Go to the bars with your friends, rather than to make friends, and you would be amazed at how different life here can be. 

[sharktooth]

If you lived in Chiang Mai you wouldn’t want to go out to the bars here as basically they are <deleted>. I think a lot of the hatred / banter / arguements here are due to sad old git’s stuck in a situation they refuse to admit to. Personally, I come on here for a laugh. There are one or two good guys on here who don’t take themselves too seriously and can laugh at themselves. Unfortunately, there also a lot of knobs.

[robblok]

18 hours ago, Essex Reject said:

It's because 99% of TV 'members' are houllier than thou. No-one drinks, smokes, take drugs etc, they visit temples and night markets and roadside eateries for their 'social lifes'. They read, write and eat noodles everyday, usually with chopsticks. All their visa's are intact and their wife's are trainee lawyers. They are way ott with their politeness towards Thai's (we're just guest here remember) and they wai up to a hundred times a day.

 

The average 'member' on here is so straight and dull, I thank my lucky stars they never frequent bars in their white socks, speedo shorts, bum bags and 10 year old sandles.

 

You know who you are.

Oh yes people who don't drink are akin to the devil. Cant be trusted and if you also don't use ladies of the night then your sure not to be trusted.

 

I don't visit bars I don't see the attraction (not anymore i did when i first came here). 

 

I don't have a problem with other expats, just with idiots and annoying (not normal) drunks. Other expats not a problem at all. But I only make friends with those who like similar stuff. Just like back home you look for people who match you.

[robblok]

13 minutes ago, elgenon said:

Anyone who assumes expats are jerks probably puts themselves in situations where that is true. At least they know they are not jerks.

 

Maybe an expat who, for instance, joins a group which is involved with a temple's activities would meet a different sort. Just musing mind you. My personal experience in gyms is that the real gym rats are, on the whole, nice guys to talk to and are respectful and helpful and mind the social norms of being in a gym. That's just me. Your mileage may vary.

I think its just normal that you like gym rats, you like working out they do too so you connect. I know I am helpful in the gym and like it when there are like minded people.

 

I have the same experience when I go fishing with Thais and foreigners, but its often so that like minded people help each-other. I am not much of a bar person so I would not make my friends there as that is just not my way to enjoy myself. Does not mean I look down on people who love drinking.

[Pete1980]

18 hours ago, BritManToo said:

As my gf always says, buying a woman a drink in a bar is the start of negotiations for buying the woman for the night. In this case she charged 150bht, that's lady drink price for a hooker.

How did you meet your girlfriend?

 

I don't agree with your assessment. I usually buy 10 to 30 ladydrinks per night out for different "ladies", but don't buy them for the night.

I think of it as a tip for them entertaining me dancing naked or topless. It is a good deal. I don't care if they drink orange juice or tequila, whatever they like, up to them.

[Jonnapat]

19 hours ago, Essex Reject said:

It's because 99% of TV 'members' are houllier than thou. No-one drinks, smokes, take drugs etc, they visit temples and night markets and roadside eateries for their 'social lifes'. They read, write and eat noodles everyday, usually with chopsticks. All their visa's are intact and their wife's are trainee lawyers. They are way ott with their politeness towards Thai's (we're just guest here remember) and they wai up to a hundred times a day.

 

The average 'member' on here is so straight and dull, I thank my lucky stars they never frequent bars in their white socks, speedo shorts, bum bags and 10 year old sandles.

 

You know who you are.

And not one of them dare admit to being gay, as a good number of us are and in my case not afraid of admitting it.

[scorecard]

6 hours ago, Enki said:

I'm not hostile to expats. But I wonder why people want to live in Pattaya or similar areas on Phuket (and then complain about prices).

 

What I don't like is expats approaching me in chopping malls or super markets insisting to be greeted as they (or I) was something special. I don't greet random strangers based on their skin colour.

 

What despises me on TV is very simple: utterly disrespect for Thai, Thai culture, Thai people, especially Thai women.

 

I loath people who write comments like this: "That's a good point, at age 50 I would have been horrified at the idea of paying a bar girl for sex, 13 years on and it's the normal thing to do after a few beers when out with my brothers-in-law, and because I'm the oldest they usually let me go first."

 

Or like this: "I know I'm undesirable, my former Brit wife told me 10 years back when she divorced me.

Told me I was so undesirable that now she was leaving I would never have sex with a woman in the room again.

I don't think she had considered the power of the pound.

I've done about 50 since then, and they were nearly all half her age and weight (or less)."

 

Somehow surprising that people measure the quality of sex by the amount of women they had ... no wonder your wife divorced you. You must be a miserable lover.

I share many of your points about Thai folks / Thai bar girls.

 

But I also keep in mind that other folks have a right (within legal & moral limits) to express their thoughts.

 

In fact reading their posts is a way to keep broadly informed about the attitudes of other people, but I'm not saying I agree with their thoughts, morals, and actions. 

 

 

Edited March 11, 2019 by scorecard

[TKDfella]

Grrrrr, moan, grunt, snarl, hiss I just think the OP is trying to break the TV page record.???? yuck. (ha!)

[ianezy0]

At this stage of the thread, I feel like I have walked into an old western style saloon after a gunfight, all the tables have overturned and blood is mixed with the sawdust on the floor.

Settle down and have a watered down whiskey on me!

[Odysseus123]

2 hours ago, jesimps said:

I agree with the OP, especially the last para. All you have to do is wait for the anti-farang replies from the usual suspects. Their names crop up repeatedly, especially in threads concerning the new immigration rules, slagging off their fellow foreigners and praising the Thais to high heaven. I could post several culprits on here, but I won't because it's so obvious who they are. I don't pretend to know what's wrong with these people, but they definitely have a personality disorder and are bucking the natural way of things.

I don't think that the majority are "fellow foreigners."

 

In actual fact I use them as a litmus test indicating what the Thai Amart (with or without the Military) is actually thinking.

 

Of course,that discounts a few of the duds with untreatable Stockholm Syndrome...as well as desperate real estate agents from Chiang Mai and environs.

That includes the desparado's trying to flog a product in Thailand.

They are merely mercenaries..

 

 

Edited March 11, 2019 by Odysseus123

[Kerryd]

I've met a lot of expats here (in Pattaya). Some are pretty good, decent people.
Others I will acknowledge in passing and that's it.

However, most of the expats I've met, I don't want to know or associate with.
I don't want to drink with them.
Or sit for hours listening to them go on and on about how this girl and that girl and some other girl ripped them off (after they've already gone on for hours about the 2-3+ ex-wives they had back "home").
Or listen to them bitch about almost everything in Thailand.
Or have (a lot of) them hit me up for a "small loan" to get them through until the pension cheque hits the bank (knowing they have no intention of ever paying you back).

Or have (some of) them try to get you to "invest" in a "sure fire" business (where you put up all the money and they take all the profit of course).

And if you have a wife/girlfriend and meet another expat, too often the first thing he does is start sizing her up and estimating his chances of bagging her because he assumes you just bar-fined her minutes ago. Even if you are shopping for diapers at Big C at 10 in the morning.

I've met some great expats, including some from this forum. We used to have "TV Piss-ups" once in awhile years ago when George was still running things. (Parties for TV members sponsored by ThaiVisa.) Met some good people there.

 

I've also met some lowlife scum (in other places) that I wouldn't give the time of day to. 

A lot of people are under the mistaken impression that "all us expats are like brothers" or some such nonsense. They have this weird notion that we should all "stick together" and "have each other's back" and so on. You see it almost every time an incident involving a foreigner makes the news. Almost everyone automatically assumes the expat/foreigner must be innocent simply because he/she is from the same country (or is the same "colour"). Even when it turns out that the (expat/foreigner) is guilty they decide it's all a cover-up.

 

But the reality is that - a very large number of the expats here can barely afford to live here (despite all their bragging to the contrary). Many of them are looking for ways to extend their stay and your money would look much better in their pocket.

Many expats are piss-pots with poor social skills (hence the number of ex's "back home" and lack of money here). 
Some are here because they can't go home - and many of them are doing the same things here that caused them to leave home in the first place.
Some are just plain "shady". The kind that you really don't want to even be in the same room with if you can help it. 
And more than a few of them are just plain racist ****s that think they are superior to everyone else on the planet.

It doesn't take long, or many meetings with other expats, to start developing a jaded view of most of them. If they haven't given you a sob story, or hit you up for money, or asked which bar your (girlfriend/wife) works in, or made some derogatory remark about Thais within the first 10 minutes of meeting them, then maybe they aren't like the rest.
Or they are just a little slower than the others.

But, as mentioned in other posts, a lot depends on where you meet those other expats. If it's in a venue where there's a shared interest (like a gym or at work or some kind of hobby/club) then you will probably meet a different "class" of expat than you would if your normal day consists of spending 12+ hours keeping a barstool warm. 

However, that doesn't mean that all the expats you meet (outside of a bar) are "jolly good chaps" either.

I have a jaded view of most expats because they've earned it. They say it only takes one bad apple to spoil the bunch but in Thailand it seems the bad apples far out number the good ones.

[scorecard]

9 minutes ago, Odysseus123 said:

I don't think that the majority are "fellow foreigners."

 

In actual fact I use them as a litmus test indicating what the Thai Amart (with or without the Military) is actually thinking.

 

Of course,that discounts a few of the duds with untreatable Stockholm Syndrome...as well as desperate real estate agents from Chiang Mai and environs.

 

They are merely mercenaries..

 

 

"

  2 hours ago, jesimps said:

I agree with the OP, especially the last para. All you have to do is wait for the anti-farang replies from the usual suspects. Their names crop up repeatedly, especially in threads concerning the new immigration rules, slagging off their fellow foreigners and praising the Thais to high heaven. I could post several culprits on here, but I won't because it's so obvious who they are. I don't pretend to know what's wrong with these people, but they definitely have a personality disorder and are bucking the natural way of things."

 

You expect folks to see your point, others also have a right to give their thoughts and to hope their point is read, but not to expect that others agree.

 

 

[Odysseus123]

8 minutes ago, Kerryd said:

I've met a lot of expats here (in Pattaya). Some are pretty good, decent people.
Others I will acknowledge in passing and that's it.

However, most of the expats I've met, I don't want to know or associate with.
I don't want to drink with them.
Or sit for hours listening to them go on and on about how this girl and that girl and some other girl ripped them off (after they've already gone on for hours about the 2-3+ ex-wives they had back "home").
Or listen to them bitch about almost everything in Thailand.
Or have (a lot of) them hit me up for a "small loan" to get them through until the pension cheque hits the bank (knowing they have no intention of ever paying you back).

Or have (some of) them try to get you to "invest" in a "sure fire" business (where you put up all the money and they take all the profit of course).

And if you have a wife/girlfriend and meet another expat, too often the first thing he does is start sizing her up and estimating his chances of bagging her because he assumes you just bar-fined her minutes ago. Even if you are shopping for diapers at Big C at 10 in the morning.

I've met some great expats, including some from this forum. We used to have "TV Piss-ups" once in awhile years ago when George was still running things. (Parties for TV members sponsored by ThaiVisa.) Met some good people there.

 

I've also met some lowlife scum (in other places) that I wouldn't give the time of day to. 

A lot of people are under the mistaken impression that "all us expats are like brothers" or some such nonsense. They have this weird notion that we should all "stick together" and "have each other's back" and so on. You see it almost every time an incident involving a foreigner makes the news. Almost everyone automatically assumes the expat/foreigner must be innocent simply because he/she is from the same country (or is the same "colour"). Even when it turns out that the (expat/foreigner) is guilty they decide it's all a cover-up.

 

But the reality is that - a very large number of the expats here can barely afford to live here (despite all their bragging to the contrary). Many of them are looking for ways to extend their stay and your money would look much better in their pocket.

Many expats are piss-pots with poor social skills (hence the number of ex's "back home" and lack of money here). 
Some are here because they can't go home - and many of them are doing the same things here that caused them to leave home in the first place.
Some are just plain "shady". The kind that you really don't want to even be in the same room with if you can help it. 
And more than a few of them are just plain racist ****s that think they are superior to everyone else on the planet.

It doesn't take long, or many meetings with other expats, to start developing a jaded view of most of them. If they haven't given you a sob story, or hit you up for money, or asked which bar your (girlfriend/wife) works in, or made some derogatory remark about Thais within the first 10 minutes of meeting them, then maybe they aren't like the rest.
Or they are just a little slower than the others.

But, as mentioned in other posts, a lot depends on where you meet those other expats. If it's in a venue where there's a shared interest (like a gym or at work or some kind of hobby/club) then you will probably meet a different "class" of expat than you would if your normal day consists of spending 12+ hours keeping a barstool warm. 

However, that doesn't mean that all the expats you meet (outside of a bar) are "jolly good chaps" either.

I have a jaded view of most expats because they've earned it. They say it only takes one bad apple to spoil the bunch but in Thailand it seems the bad apples far out number the good ones.

Agree...

 

An American that I knew used to kept "open house" with the booze flowing (he died of chronic alcholism) and went to meet his maker..

 

Do you know how many of his foreign fellow boozers went to his funeral?

 

None.

 

Only my wife and I attended and that was to acknowledge the passing of an American veteran of the wars...

 

Only the U.S Embassy,and some Thai's attended (plus me-and I am an Aussie)

Edited March 11, 2019 by Odysseus123

[Lacessit]

1 minute ago, Odysseus123 said:

Agree...

 

An American that I knew used to kept "open house" with the booze flowing (he died of chronic alcholism) and went to meet his maker..

 

Do you know how many of his foreign fellow boozers went to his funeral?

 

None.

 

Only my wife and I attended and that was to acknowledge the passing of an Americann veteran of the wars...

 

Only the U.S Embassy,and some Thai's attended (plus me-and I am an Aussie)

Being boozers, they probably forgot which day his funeral was. Too much alcohol destroys brain cells.

[watcharacters]

;

Edited March 11, 2019 by watcharacters