why can't people stay alone ?

[havair]

Its a sad man my friend who's living in his own skin and can't stand the company .   

[ravip]

Why can't people stay alone?

Just my 2¢, for whatever it is worth!

Going back through history, humans have always lived in communities. It is obviouse that humans cannot live a 'normal' life in isolation. Many a time, we have read in the news how people in isolation had done seirial killings, child abuse etc.

Solitary confinement is considered to be a form of psychological torture with measurable long-term physiological effects when the period of confinement is longer than a few weeks or is continued indefinitely.

Today, we see how the young generation walks about with their faces glued to their electronic devices, totally oblivious of their surroundings and the enviorenment, which itself is a very good indication that the lack of social interaction damages the human mind. Yes, I have seen in many social gatherings, people are still staring at their screens!

Definitely not, socialising people are not empty, devoid of any inside strength, or lack of any kind of spirituality, or empty vessels who have to meet up with others to have superficial conversations to confirm that they matter - No! they are perfectly normal human beings.

It is the habitual loner, or the anti-social being, who one should be careful of. He/she amy be suffering from some psychological problem.

Of course, sometimes everyone needs to get inside their 'cave' for awhile which is normal.

More reading

[RJRS1301]

10 minutes ago, worgeordie said:

You won the prize ,It's not anything he's done,its the Ghost of his

wife who died quite a few years now.

regards worgeordie

He was not good to her?? 

[stouricks]

1 hour ago, SAINT THOMAS said:

While I am back in America in solitude, my wife is in Thailand in solitude.

 

The Truth is No One is Ever Alone, most just don't understand, you can look at photos of Spirit Orbs and this is what comes out of the body a few minutes after death.

 

I know this from my Dogs spirit passing through me a few minutes after she died in my arms as an Orb some 20 years ago, at that time before seeing photos of spirit orbs online, I used to explain it to family and friends that it was no bigger then a softball and no smaller then a baseball, very calming, peaceful and cool in temperature as it passed through me. 

 

In the Bible its explained as what keeps the flesh alive, the spirit in the blood, the heart the center of the orb.

 

In the Gospel of Thomas this is what Jesus is talking about.

 

Jesus said, "If those who lead you say to you, 'See, the kingdom is in the sky,' then the birds of the sky will precede you. If they say to you, 'It is in the sea,' then the fish will precede you.

 

Rather, the kingdom is inside of you, and it is outside of you.

 

When you come to know yourselves, then you will become known, and you will realize that it is you who are the sons of the living father. But if you will not know yourselves, you dwell in poverty and it is you who are that poverty."

 

Its also what Rumi is talking about.

 

“I searched for God and found only myself. I searched for myself and found only God.”

 

God is the LORD of Hosts or God is the LORD of Spirits. 

 

The music video by Katy Perry is speaking about the very same thing but you don't see it because you relate it to the Material World instead of the Unseen World.

 

 

 

 

And what if I am a Muslim, Buddhist, Hindu, Rastafarian, Athehist?

[soalbundy]

3 hours ago, Lacessit said:

I'm an introvert, being alone is no problem at all to me. However, I can also understand this current situation must be very difficult for the Thais, being one of the most socially cohesive people on the planet.

Nuts to spirituality, it's whether you are comfortable in your own skin.

Perhaps you just feel uncomfortable with the word itself. Becoming aware of the self is spirituality. With no outside distraction you can fall into contemplation. Can the perceiver be perceived, if mind is just thoughts what is perceiving these thoughts, what is the space between two thoughts, If 'I' is the primary thought what came before 'I', without 'I' there is no 'me' 'you', 'yours', 'mine'. There was a condition prior to consciousness before 'I' was formed by the mind, the original state without concepts, only 'it is as it is'. Very small children use, like the Thais, the third person reference, "Peter is hungry", "Peter has pain,"there is something called Peter that has pain awareness, only later does the 'I' thought appear, it comes with concepts, difference, separateness. For those without any spiritual awareness 'I' means loneliness, fear, the need for confirmation.

Edited March 29, 2020 by soalbundy

[Isaanbiker]

2 hours ago, NCC1701A said:

I have always been good alone. Of course most of the issue is psychological. Many people wishing they could do something they were not doing before anyway. Just like taking toys away from children. 

 

my cats are worried  because when i leave i usually bring some type of food back to the house.

 

The pattern of me arriving home with bags of stuff that they have learned eventually leads to cat food and the remains of BBQ chicken carcasses or other goodies has been broken. So perhaps they are suffering in their cat brains.

 

If by the time this is over if you don't have every possible thing organized like all your photos, music, all media, taxes, paper files, tools sorted, motorcycle washed, shirts sorted by color in the closet, you have wasted a great opportunity. 

 

I am making a spread sheet for my next next trip to some where in Thailand. Everything but the departure dates.

 

on another note, many expats I have talked to via LINE are not following the orders to stay home and are walking on the beach, riding bikes, walking and shopping for nonessential items for home improvement. But I guess they are making good use of the time.  

 

Hanging out on the internet reading about a "state of emergency" and then going outside and expecting to see the apocalypse and seeing that nothing has changed here in Hua Hin except for reduced traffic and a few closed bars shows you the power of news media to influence your thinking.

 

Be honest how many of you now are jumping out of bed like Christmas morning to see what new catastrophic virus event is being announced today?   

 

by the way, this happen to me before.

 

 

It's difficult to be a space cadet, isn't it? 

 

2 hours ago, Nyezhov said:

My favourite! Especially when the media screams about something that is a reverse from their position yesterday.

 

As to being alone, the times I spent talking to myself in my 25 years in Alaska prepared me. 

Try to build an igloo and you'll always be busy.........

[thaibeachlovers]

3 hours ago, soalbundy said:

A common theme seems to be people having trouble with isolation, even those in isolation with a partner. What is wrong with them? are they so empty, devoid of any inside strength, a lack of any kind of spirituality, empty vessels who have to meet up with others to have superficial conversations to confirm that they matter.

Just because one can be alone, does not mean that everyone should be able to. I saw the young tourists in LOS that have to phone mummy every day because they can't be "alone". Just accept that not everyone is the same.

 

[canthai55]

Face it - most people are sheep.

They have never had to endure any hardship more pressing than a broken nail or a flat tire.

Never lived on the edge, done time, slept in their car, wondered where the next meal is coming from.

To them it was all about graduate from school, get that job with a pension and a gold watch at the end, get married and have 2.5 kids and a house with a white picket fence. Citizens.

Those that have learned what it takes to survive, what mindset is required, what tools you need, know that you gotta be tough.

Most are marshmallows, no substance, backbones like spaghetti.

P and M about the trivial, run away from the serious.

 

[richard_smith237]

8 minutes ago, canthai55 said:

Face it - most people are sheep.

They have never had to endure any hardship more pressing than a broken nail or a flat tire.

Never lived on the edge, done time, slept in their car, wondered where the next meal is coming from.

To them it was all about graduate from school, get that job with a pension and a gold watch at the end, get married and have 2.5 kids and a house with a white picket fence. Citizens.

Those that have learned what it takes to survive, what mindset is required, what tools you need, know that you gotta be tough.

Most are marshmallows, no substance, backbones like spaghetti.

P and M about the trivial, run away from the serious.

 

Indeed, including seeking approval in forums such as this.... we are all sheep in some form or other. 

 

I agree, many have no substance or backbone, but when hands are forced peoples character will shine through. 

Most people are stronger than they know, we’ve just had it easy for too long and there’s nothing wrong with that, its what quality of life is all about. 

 

I’m stuck overseas at work in another country, no relief, no chance to see my family for the forceable future - it is what it is, I’ve a good wife who can handle that. Some guys in the military are isolated from their families all the time and get paid less while getting shot at... all we are asked to do is sit inside and watch a bit of TV or write <deleted> on ThaiVisa !!! its not that hard is it? 

 

But, we [humans] are social animals, so it will naturally stress some. 

 

 

[cyril sneer]

Being alone in isolation, and spending time in isolation with a partner or family are 2 completely separate issues

 

I only suffer from the latter

[CraigInBangkok]

Been happy to be on my own and do my own thing for a long time, stopped following the crowd sometime shortly after I left school(30+ years ago) ... just wish at this time i was in a country with a nice selection of legal pot 

[ravip]

1 hour ago, canthai55 said:

Face it - most people are sheep.

They have never had to endure any hardship more pressing than a broken nail or a flat tire.

Never lived on the edge, done time, slept in their car, wondered where the next meal is coming from.

To them it was all about graduate from school, get that job with a pension and a gold watch at the end, get married and have 2.5 kids and a house with a white picket fence. Citizens.

Those that have learned what it takes to survive, what mindset is required, what tools you need, know that you gotta be tough.

Most are marshmallows, no substance, backbones like spaghetti.

P and M about the trivial, run away from the serious.

 

Most people did not join the SAS

(also they don't want to pretend that they are ex SAS)

[canthai55]

SAS - what u talking about ?

Wrong side of the tracks for me

[drbeach]

6 hours ago, Curt1591 said:

Used to love hopping in my 4x4, heading across the desert, and not encountering people, or even pavement, for days at a time. 

Me too. Love solitude and wide open spaces so much I'm contemplating moving to live on a farm in Texas to escape all the crowds in Thailand. Definitely love the relatively sparsely populated USA.

[ravip]

14 minutes ago, canthai55 said:

SAS - what u talking about ?

Wrong side of the tracks for me

Sorry, I meant Special Air Service, SEAL etc. 

Those guys are not marshmallows, no substance, backbones like spaghetti.

But the normal human being is a 'marshmallow' in your standards.

Hope I fell on the correct side of the track.

[sirineou]

Members of this forum spend their time in this forum because they prefer being alone   

[Assurancetourix]

8 hours ago, soalbundy said:

A common theme seems to be people having trouble with isolation,

 

I do not know what is your sense of isolation because what I see around me looks like it however very well

If it is not isolation, what is it?

 

Edited March 29, 2020 by Assurancetourix

[ben2talk]

I'm okay - I've got more books to read than I can manage in my lifetime, punctuated with some great TV, Youtube, online Radio and podcasts... not a problem for me as long as I can get to Makro every month or so to top up, and get fresh herbs n stuff in the soi once a week.

[amykat]

7 hours ago, soalbundy said:

Perhaps you just feel uncomfortable with the word itself. Becoming aware of the self is spirituality. With no outside distraction you can fall into contemplation. Can the perceiver be perceived, if mind is just thoughts what is perceiving these thoughts, what is the space between two thoughts, If 'I' is the primary thought what came before 'I', without 'I' there is no 'me' 'you', 'yours', 'mine'. There was a condition prior to consciousness before 'I' was formed by the mind, the original state without concepts, only 'it is as it is'. Very small children use, like the Thais, the third person reference, "Peter is hungry", "Peter has pain,"there is something called Peter that has pain awareness, only later does the 'I' thought appear, it comes with concepts, difference, separateness. For those without any spiritual awareness 'I' means loneliness, fear, the need for confirmation.

I prescribe a large dose of Richard Dawkins to you!!  Get over this sickness!!

[ivor bigun]

Ive always thought i am the most interesting person i know ,so being alone never worried me ,however its never happened ,i have never ever been alone ,except for a few days now and again.

????

[DrTuner]

There are people who's life is completely defined by what they have outside themselves. They are usually easy to spot: need to be the center of attention, trying to praise the benefits of overtly active social life to anybody within hearing distance, have all possible social media accounts active 24/7 and so on. Borderline mental, avoid at all costs ( corona or not ).

[fhickson]

watching tv, internet and your cell phone does not count as being alone. its the same as being in a crowd.

[rabas]

9 hours ago, ravip said:

Why can't people stay alone?

Just my 2¢, for whatever it is worth!

Going back through history, humans have always lived in communities. It is obviouse that humans cannot live a 'normal' life in isolation. Many a time, we have read in the news how people in isolation had done seirial killings, child abuse etc.

Solitary confinement is considered to be a form of psychological torture with measurable long-term physiological effects when the period of confinement is longer than a few weeks or is continued indefinitely.

Today, we see how the young generation walks about with their faces glued to their electronic devices, totally oblivious of their surroundings and the enviorenment, which itself is a very good indication that the lack of social interaction damages the human mind. Yes, I have seen in many social gatherings, people are still staring at their screens!

Definitely not, socialising people are not empty, devoid of any inside strength, or lack of any kind of spirituality, or empty vessels who have to meet up with others to have superficial conversations to confirm that they matter - No! they are perfectly normal human beings.

It is the habitual loner, or the anti-social being, who one should be careful of. He/she amy be suffering from some psychological problem.

Of course, sometimes everyone needs to get inside their 'cave' for awhile which is normal.

More reading

You completely confuse being alone and being with yourself. Black and white.  Although I do have friends, I have no better friend than myself and I am never alone. Myself would never dream of being a serial killer and I would never let him. 

 

The people you are thinking of are alone even in the presence of others.

 

[Nyezhov]

5 minutes ago, rabas said:

Myself would never dream of being a serial killer and I would never let him. 

well Im glad you got yours under control, mine does stupid stuff like farting in the elevator or telling random babes that they got bodacious tatas. What a jerk myself is.

[EVENKEEL]

18 hours ago, Zikomat said:

That beach thing is pathetic... What is it actually good for? 

If you have to ask the question, you would never understand the answer.

[mrfill]

20 hours ago, MartinL said:

I love being alone. Spent 20 years in UK, post-divorce, living alone (apart from a cat) and it was wonderful. Met a Thai woman who changed that and I came to Thailand with her. Pretty soon I found that nothing had really changed and that, apart from her (and the stepchildren/grandchildren now), I still preferred solitude to seeking company. 

 

Walking alone for miles in the countryside, listening to birds and relative silence, watching the animals, looking at plants, was always my idea of heaven - don't do that here.

 

Motorcycling is something I've always enjoyed. On the bike, you can go places alone even when with a group of friends. On a long run, you might stop for fuel together but apart from that - solitude ..... and everybody understands completely if you say you don't want to (do some activity) because you'd rather be out on the bike.

 

@ AussieBob 18 - funny you should mention Asperger's; often thought of myself as on that plane, quite happy to be so and don't care.

 

I live alone in the UK and the isolation is no big deal. What is a problem is not being able to go out. I too ride bikes (have 9 of them...) but we are not allowed to use them at the moment as it is deemed 'unnecessary'. We can go out for a short exercise or to shop. The real <deleted> is that round here (North Suffolk) is very rural and very pretty. I could probably sneak out and go round some country lanes, but I have to consider that if I have an accident, would I want to go to hospital or even a doctor? That's a big no-no - so the bikes stay in the garage. I do want to survive to be able to ride them again one day, especially at 68. Roll on July....

 

(Kwak ZX6, ER6F, GPZ500, Yamaha FZ6s2, 3x Honda cubs, 1x Honda Wave, Velocette LE is the list)

[canthai55]

15 hours ago, ravip said:

Those guys are not marshmallows, no substance, backbones like spaghetti.

Guess you missed word #3 in my post

[car720]

21 hours ago, AussieBob18 said:

It used to be clinically called 'psychologically dependent' - but that term is now used to describe the mental processes in recovering from addictions.  The modern term is :  Dependent Personality Disorder (DPD) - used for those with a severe form of the mental condition.  However, as we all know, people are all crazy and there is a belief among some psycologists that we all have one of two mental conditions - most very mildly - some both.  Those two conditions are 'Dependent' and 'Aspergers'.  People with severe Aspergers are Autistic - those with a severe need to be with/near others are DPD.  Males are more likely to be Aspergers and very independent, and females are more likely to be DPD and very 'social'.  All very emerging stuff - no one really knows. But it makes sense in the context of why some people need others, and some people do not. Some people can have it mildly and then something triggers it and it becomes severe - older people are prone to becoming 'dependent'.

 

I would also surmise that those people who have moved to a foreign country to live, are very much likely to be 'independent' type people.  And those that stay living near where they grew up and would never even move to another City/town are very likely to be 'dependent'.

I have 2 other interpretations, though your comments are spot on as well.  Firstly, the Chinese call them Shao Huangdi, 'little emperor/ess.  Spoiled from birth so simply know no better.  Secondly, I believe it has a lot to do with the current trend of women making their living off child support and getting rid of their husband to do it.  Man the hunter, woman the gatherer and now millenials the super gatherers.

[1FinickyOne]

20 hours ago, robblok said:

On parties i talk too much,

usually a symptom of loneliness... or too much to drink.. or both

[nobodysfriend]

20 hours ago, JHolmesJr said:

 

All the people who went through life being mocked for having no friends and zero social life 

are now laughing. (or maybe managing a wry smile)

Not much has changed for me ... I live on an island that has very few people .

I always preferred the company of my wife and our now 11 dogs ( I can't let them die of hunger , can I ? ) to the always same boring conversations when you meet  'new' people ...

I live in the middle of nature but close to the beach . Every morning I take some dogs for a long walk to the beach or somewhere else ...

I still do all that now . The only thing that has changed for me is that I am wearing a mask now when I get close to other people .

 

I knew for a long time that something to reduce the population was going to happen . First I thought millions would die because of the effects of global warming and the related extremes in weather ... ( Harvests wrecked , huge bushfires , droughts , inondations , landslides ,

toxic air , deforestations , warming of the oceans , polluted water, all this destabilising and de-equilibrating the ecosystems ) .

But now I think that this little virus who does this job much better without causing any damage to the ecosystems . It only targets people .

People are at the origin of most of the trouble and now people are taught a lesson ...If people will learn something from this lesson ?

I doubt it ...

 

Anyway , enjoy your day ...

if you don't , you are simply wasting your time .

And a bit of ( limited )  time is all you have in life . Everything you ' own ' is only borrowed ... after you die , somebody else will own it ...