Need suggested place in US to relocate family

[AgMech Cowboy]

On 4/27/2020 at 2:21 PM, Sheryl said:

Not another big city, obviously.

@Sheryl, how big is not big? My first thought was Bryan-College Station Texas or one of the small towns near-by. A plus for BCS is that there is a bus transit system and some excellent doctors and hospitals.  There are also a few of the Senior citizen apartment complexes (my Mother used one when she was alive and lived there 3-4 yrs), although, I do not know if they would lease on a 6 month basis. My oldest brother who lives in BCS handled all of that for her.

 

Then I thought about Arizona. Sadly, I know very little about the state except that there are many snow birds.  My ex lives there and is a PA. She might be willing to send me info.

[Sheryl]

Thanks all, lots of good suggestions. I have a call scheduled with my aunt tomorrow morning and will discuss with her.

[Mac98]

Solvang, CA. Gorgeous winter weather in small town, wine tasting, bakeries, they can even get around by horse and buggy like Central Park. 

[Mac98]

53 minutes ago, Mac98 said:

Solvang, CA. Gorgeous winter weather in small town, wine tasting, bakeries, they can even get around by horse and buggy like Central Park. 

Ashville, N.C., a scenic mountain town with mild winters, is a popular liberal enclave.

[Dan747]

Most New Yorkers left for Florida. There are lot's of small towns that would work for your family. Google map it and see for yourself.  "GOOD LUCK!!"  

[Iron Tongue]

I just moved my mom to Boulder, CO before covid-19 swept thru CA.  Great place if you can handle the winter, pricey though.

[daveAustin]

Hi Sheryl. Not from the US, but during my travels there was impressed with Florida's Gulf coastline, being generally more laid-back than the other side. Really liked Naples (albeit going back 20 years), and so many options up the coast, with all them satellite towns off Fort Myers and Tampa. Boulder is also great, San Luis Obispo etc, but further off and probably cheaper and easier to travel to and within Florida.

 

Off topic, but on my travels there (did 28 states including Hawaii), it seemed systematic that people would wonder why on earth you'd be heading to Florida! Strange. There's a new thread on here entitled the 'US sucks' or summat. Dunno what it's like nowadays, but that guy seems to be lacking imagination because you guys have so many options.

 

Though tourist-centric, always found Wikitravel (page on south Florida) gives an easy overview of places.

 

Hope you get them sorted out. You've done a lot for folks on here over the years so nice to see people giving you some attention. All the best.

 

[GinBoy2]

1 hour ago, Iron Tongue said:

I just moved my mom to Boulder, CO before covid-19 swept thru CA.  Great place if you can handle the winter, pricey though.

I love Boulder, but it's pricey.

 

The winters almost everywhere in the Rocky Mountain West are great compared to NYC. 

 

Powder snow, opposed to the heavy wet snow you get in the East, and in general you'll see blue sky almost everyday.

 

My thoughts on FL is the fact that so many New York snow birders move down there, probably makes it as dangerous as NYC 

Edited April 29, 2020 by GinBoy2

[sirineou]

On 4/27/2020 at 3:21 AM, Sheryl said:

My elderly (88 year old) aunt and uncle, who were like parents to me, live in New York City, COVID epicenter. I see very little chance there will not be another wave next winter (the current wave is still in the tripe digits for that matter, but on the decrease)  and I would like to get them out of NYC for say 6 months November - May (approx) and looking for suggested places where I could rent them a place. Not another big city, obviously.

 

They are independent living but do not drive and this is the big constraint. Most of the US, you need a car to get around.

 

Anyone have any suggestions of say a small town with supermarkets etc in walking distance?

 

I don:t think they could handle the heat in Thailand even if it were to prove possible to get them here and deal with the visa aspects.

Palm Coast Florida is a community 87,000 people so it is not a small town and will not be walking to the supermarkets , but. It has a lot to offer for an elderly couple. 

First I call Palm Coast  "New York lite" they will meet more people from NY than they did when they were in NY, it has world class hospitals , an infrastructure for elderly people, and public transportation system that for $2 they will pick you up at your house take you where you want to go, and then pick you up again layer and take you home. Elderly people use them for shopping  doctors appointments. public library etc. . 

http://www.flaglercounty.org/departments/transportation/index.php

The Bell tare swim and racket club has many programs for the elderly , to keep them active and in shape. and it is probably covered by their insurance. 

There are no state taxes and real estate is reasonable. 

Search the MLS for properties here: https://www.usamls.net/flagler/default.asp?content=search&menu_id=197602

If you need more info PM me. 

 

 

[olfu]

^{As you expect from Florida resident I recommend Florida.}

^{Florida is a big state and up north is cold in winter and in the south you have Thailand climate. And rent before you buy is a rule.}

^{You have to do your home work before you move and money is most important factor.}

 

 

[jimmybcool]

I live in a retirement golf community.  We are about a 15 minute ride from the nearest store/business.  But, grocers deliver and the clubhouse is fine for occasional dining (when it reopens).  Being in Arizona not sure NYers would want to be here in August but the months you describe are wonderful.  We have a nice community spirit although I'm not sure how many people they will meet at 88.  Kinda hard to socialize at that age.

 

Finding a small condo or house with a golf cart included would give them freedom inside the community.  I know other places here but it is high season so most will be expensive for 6 months of the high season.  If any of this is of interest PM me and I will look around to get ballpark costs.

 

 

 

 

[fredwiggy]

11 hours ago, Sheryl said:

 

Thanks, someone else mentioned it as well. Seems to be pretty large in size (>100 sq mi), is there a compact downtown area?

It's a small town, and there are apartments and homes to rent within shopping distance. Kerrville is nice also,but spread out. You would have to find a home or apartment close to one of the two HEB'S (grocery). I lived in Texas for 30 years until 2018

[Damrongsak]

13 hours ago, jcates29 said:

...I moved here from Chiang Rai with my wife.  My wife wouldn't dream of playing golf.  Now she gets after me to hurry up and make a tee time.  She also loves bowling and visiting neighbors and taking walks.  She is so glad we moved here.  ...

Off the web: "The racial makeup of The Villages CDP was 98.3% White, 0.3% African American, 0.1% Native American, 0.8% Asian, 0.0% Pacific Islander, and 0.3% from two or more races. Hispanics or Latinos of any race made up 1.8% of the population. ..."

 

So can you hop in a golf cart and score some som dam and guy yang down on the corner? ????

[scorecard]

On 4/27/2020 at 10:52 PM, taxout said:

How do they feel about leaving the apartment they've probably lived in for decades. And a neighborhood they know like the back of their hand. Not to mention friends, doctors, and others who know them.

 

Moving ageing relatives "for their own good" is one very tough assignment. And when you're not going to be living in the vicinity of their new place to provide a welcome and companionship, it may be far more difficult than just a very tough assignment.

 

As well, the obvious and convenient choice is some sort of retirement village. But that sort of semi-communal living with other older folks raises its own risks when it comes to the virus, whether in a big or small city.

But keep in mind that there are numerous configurations of retirement villages.

 

Some have common hallways etc., which is of course highly undesirable because it keeps people too close together in regard to the virus.

 

And there are other villages where everybody lives in a stand alone apartment or several apartment in a small block, but each apartment has it's own entrance separate from other apartments. More desirable. But such villages are usually far from cheap and often there is a not small 'entrance' fee, plus rental etc.

 

 

[srowndedbyh2o]

On 4/27/2020 at 8:18 PM, Sheryl said:

Any ideas about Hilo, Hawaii? Culturally I think they:d be fine there but I really don:t know much about the city (other than it is fairly small).

Hilo can be a very nice place to live if you like a very slow-paced, mellow lifestyle, but it’s definitely not everyones cup of tea.

I would not suggest you move them to Hilo for two very important reasons.

One is the lack of good public transportation, although there is a way around that. Sort of.

Two, don’t expect the same lever or availability of medical care that you may be used to.

If you are still considering Hilo and have any questions, you can pm me.

[checkered flag]

Although you say they want to go, it can be very traumatic to the elderly. They don't drive and need to figure out how to get things done. Anything on the coast or with mountain views can be very expensive, esp in California or Hawaii. Making new friends without a senior center etc will be an issue. At 88 they are best to stay put and visit you when they can.

If they are rich they have many choices, if moderate or low income very few. 

Your a nurse and may have taken care of order patients. They have special needs that only increase in time, Putting them in a new environment will probably make thing worse. 

[AgMech Cowboy]

12 hours ago, Mac98 said:

Solvang, CA. Gorgeous winter weather in small town, wine tasting, bakeries, they can even get around by horse and buggy like Central Park. 

Sounds like heaven, but CA is run by idiots. ????

[checkered flag]

Solvang like all SoCal coastal cities is very pricey. My daughter's two bedroom townhouse in San Luis Obispo is in the 1,000,000 dollar range. You can't walk to the store but there is bus service. I do like Solvang though.

[Sheryl]

2 hours ago, checkered flag said:

Although you say they want to go, it can be very traumatic to the elderly. They don't drive and need to figure out how to get things done. Anything on the coast or with mountain views can be very expensive, esp in California or Hawaii. Making new friends without a senior center etc will be an issue. At 88 they are best to stay put and visit you when they can.

If they are rich they have many choices, if moderate or low income very few. 

Your a nurse and may have taken care of order patients. They have special needs that only increase in time, Putting them in a new environment will probably make thing worse. 

 

You need you consider that I know them, their habits, likes, interests  and their situation you do not.

 

They have never set foot in a senior center in their life and never will.

 

They are well able to make their own decisions.

 

One of the big concerns is that I am their only close relative, have their health power of attorney etc etc and would really need to be there -- and they would desperately want me there -- if anything went wrong (not just COVID - any medical issue, which although they are presently healthy and fit, at their age can happen any time). Right now we face a situation where I cannot get there and they cannot reach a  functioning health system. Going through that again, for 3-6 months, next winter is a bad enough scenario that it is worth considering other measures.

[Sheryl]

29 minutes ago, AgMech Cowboy said:

Sounds like heaven, but CA is run by idiots. ????

 

Those "idiots" handled COVID pretty well.

 

And manage to have pretty good health services.

[californiabeachboy]

I would second the thought of coastal California. Nice winters, good social services, and a vibrant educational/intellectual community for the elders. Good public transportation in the smaller towns. So far relatively good for the coronavirus. It can be expensive for housing, but electricity bills are peanuts even in the winter, and you can go for a walk on the beach for free. I would look at Carlsbad in North San Diego County, or maybe Mendocino north of San Francisco. I am in my late 60's, hate driving, and this my spot. 

[cmarshall]

If they are typical New Yorkers like me, wouldn't they rather be dead in a ditch than living in red state?

[Sheryl]

6 minutes ago, cmarshall said:

If they are typical New Yorkers like me, wouldn't they rather be dead in a ditch than living in red state?

 

Unlikely to agree to a red state, yes, unless it is a blue enclave within one (which do exist)

 

They are currently mulling over a move to Woodstock (NY), have friends living there

[Dart12]

Columbus Ohio is a fantastic area to check out.  Even places close to downtown are going to be very cheap compared to where you are moving them from.

However, not sure if that would be a great move just for winters, seeing how it is also a city with Northern winters (although not nearly as brutal as NY or Cleveland or Buffalo or Chicago.

I mean, if I'm moving for 6 months I'd like to move somewhere warm.  Downtown Fort Myers might be an option then.  Cute area and a little main street area with restaurants.  Lots of fully furnished places.
Very elderly city (oddly so). Cheap flights to the north.

***NOT anywhere in fort Myers,  ONLY DOWNTOWN Ft Myers you want to search.  Reason is, FL in general is a TERRIBLE place for transit.  Everything is 30 minutes away minimum.

But if they are willing to move year round.  Definitely look into Columbus Ohio.

Edited April 30, 2020 by Dart12

[GinBoy2]

3 hours ago, Sheryl said:

 

You need you consider that I know them, their habits, likes, interests  and their situation you do not.

 

They have never set foot in a senior center in their life and never will.

 

They are well able to make their own decisions.

 

One of the big concerns is that I am their only close relative, have their health power of attorney etc etc and would really need to be there -- and they would desperately want me there -- if anything went wrong (not just COVID - any medical issue, which although they are presently healthy and fit, at their age can happen any time). Right now we face a situation where I cannot get there and they cannot reach a  functioning health system. Going through that again, for 3-6 months, next winter is a bad enough scenario that it is worth considering other measures.

That only living relative thing is hard. 

I'm an only child and especially when you are half a world away.

 

I remember vividly. I was waiting in LAX for my flight, tried to call my Dad and when I couldn't reach him, I knew the drill called the hospital, they told me he was there and doing OK. 

 

By the time I landed in BKK and turned on my phone I was getting a call to tell me he had died of sepsis. Went home, repacked my bags and got on a plane the next day straight back to LAX.

 

Problem is right now all that travel is impossible, and as an airline employee, not totally sure when a lot of it will return to normal. 

Edited April 30, 2020 by GinBoy2

[GinBoy2]

17 hours ago, checkered flag said:

Solvang like all SoCal coastal cities is very pricey. My daughter's two bedroom townhouse in San Luis Obispo is in the 1,000,000 dollar range. You can't walk to the store but there is bus service. I do like Solvang though.

I'm a Cali native, and as beautiful as almost all of the coastal towns and cities are, from North to South, it's awful expensive, even just to rent, so that would rule most of it out for a short term rental.

 

Inland Empire, Central Valley maybe, but once you've made that compromise there are much better choices in other States, especially if you are looking for somewhere to socially distance your family

Edited April 30, 2020 by GinBoy2

[lannarebirth]

On 4/28/2020 at 9:31 PM, Sheryl said:

Is Palm Springs walkble? I.e. can one live there without a car?

Not really. You might consider Berkeley. Lots of intellectual stimulation, good services and collegiate buzz. Rent's gonna be higher than hell though.

[GinBoy2]

9 hours ago, lannarebirth said:

Not really. You might consider Berkeley. Lots of intellectual stimulation, good services and collegiate buzz. Rent's gonna be higher than hell though.

I'm a UC Berkeley alum, and I love the place, but...

 

The cost of living there is through the roof nowadays. 

 

As San Francisco got so expensive it radiated out to the East Bay, even Oakland which used to be the 'red headed stepchild' of the Bay Area is now ridiculously expensive

[lannarebirth]

57 minutes ago, GinBoy2 said:

I'm a UC Berkeley alum, and I love the place, but...

 

The cost of living there is through the roof nowadays. 

 

As San Francisco got so expensive it radiated out to the East Bay, even Oakland which used to be the 'red headed stepchild' of the Bay Area is now ridiculously expensive

 

I was thinking anyone living on the Upper West Side of Manhatten might be able to swing the rent. But then again they could have been living in a rent controlled apartment for decades now.  Anyhow, as a San Francisco native I don't look down on Oakland so much. It's got the best climate in the entire Bay Area 

[srowndedbyh2o]

23 hours ago, GinBoy2 said:

I'm a Cali native,

I’ve never heard a native Californian use the word “Cali” before.