The wrong reasons to retire to Thailand?

[Ireland32]

9 hours ago, Sujo said:

Why not, but if i were him i would do long visits to other countries also and then chose which country he suits better.

 

Thats what i did and chose malaysia, though not retired.

Malaysia, Nope, yuk

[Aliflair]

6 minutes ago, IAMHERE said:

Multiply the cost of a two week vacation by 26, then multiply that by how many years you have left. If you have that much money in the bank (wherever) then I say go for it. Otherwise you'll be old, lonely and poor before your time.

I get your point but respectfully suggest that it's not going to be possible for most people to repeat the intensity of a 2 week trip for a full year. For starters you'd probably have a condo vs a hotel, so money saved there, and you'd probably fit in more "rest days", if for no other reason than recovery. Having said that if he was the type to send money for sick buffalo then maybe it would be the same as a year of 2 week'ers ????

[DJ54]

Is he in a profession should the change go sideways so that he can find employment if needed..... 

[Max69xl]

9 hours ago, georgegeorgia said:

So i discussed with him,is life for a 50yo going to be much more exciting everyday for him than going to work everyday in Sydney Australia?

is somehow selling all his assets about 10 million going to give a better life eg for him stopping the loneliness or depression.

the answer i believe is NO

I feel empathy for him but that is a wrong reason to "retire" even at his relatively young age especially with only 10 million baht to last him a lifetime and no house or job to go back to if suddenly he gets....lonely in Thailand too.

It seems like you are the one who shouldn't retire in Thailand. Don't tell people what to do. 

[DaRoadrunner]

I would suggest he keeps his house back in Oz as somewhere to return to should he need later. While over here he could rent his house out to tenants, this would provide an income to live on while in Thailand.

[stephenterry]

2 hours ago, sidjameson said:

Very nice post.

What's the total cost per month for the live in carer? Sounds like a possibility for me.

Perhaps you could message me, and I'll send you full details. 

[DJ54]

He needs to consider his son is moving interstate not to another country. Surely if here in Thailand he’ll miss his son and who knows

what prices air tickets will be after Covid... most airlines are going

to be gutted..... 

[kingdong]

Money can,t buy you love,------the beatles all joking aside do you want a full on 24/7 relationship for the sake of a few minutes of sex?just have the edited highlights,holiday there,and pay as you go. Never burn your bridges.

[rocketdave]

Until I retired some three years ago I was a contract engineer in the aerospace/defense industry. I made the choice to base myself in Pattaya a bit over 35 years ago, a nice place to live and up to date communications. When my retirement came up where to go but back to my half life base. Seen no reason to question that choice yet.

[SiSePuede419]

There are 3 reasons it's wrong to retire in Thailand.

 

1. You think a relationship with an ex-bargirl will end well.

 

2. You think a relationship with an ex-bargirl will end well.

 

3. You think a relationship with an ex-bargirl will end well.

 

????????????

 

[EricTh]

If he can't make friends in a Australia, what are the chances of him making friends in a country like Thailand where most Thai can't speak good English?

[Tropposurfer]

about 500K AUD after he sells assets huh.

50 years old.

Pension kicks in at 65 (if he hasn't got a tonne of superannuation he'll get the full pension at 65) By that time if the pension remains indexed he'll get in excess of 2000 AUD a fortnight.

So, he's got 15 years of funding his life entirely, with (none stated) income from other sources if he ups sticks. 

Say he lives on 40K AUD a year which is simple basic-reasonable at todays exchange rates), then in 15 years there won't be much left.

That would leave a few hundred K AUD for the next, say, 25 years of increasing age and frailty (plus his pension).

From an economic angle I'd say this is a bridge too far, especially if he is undisciplined or prone to lapses in that fiscal control.

The suggestion of a time-out might work if he has lots of leave and sick-leave accrued. But to leave his job at age 50 and then re-enter the workforce might, might prove difficult, especially at the rates or pay he receives now should he resign (unless he has a job, and or relationship with employer or customers that is so equitable he can return to the same job or similar without too much trouble).

Maybe a pause/assessment of sorts with a good similar age counsellor (I'm biased as a retired psychotherapist about sitting with counsellors so please forgive me for tabling this idea) to look at his life and to find ways to bring more relationship into his life. I agree he sounds lonely, and hasn't been able to develop relationships and 'his own life'.

If this interpretation of what you have posted about your friend then this would not be unusual for many Aussie men (other races same same) around poor intimacy skills.

Coming to a place where he can't speak the lingo, has to wait maybe a year at the very least (if he gets a good language teacher) and works solidly at this learning to be able to speak fundamentally isn't a good thing for someone who is depressed and lonely. 

If he is a good judge of people and makes good decisions around making deeper friendships - not just cursory 'goodaye mate' ones (sounds like he avoids being in a space to even have to make such assessments) then coming to a place he doesn't really know and a culture vastly different to his own may prove difficult (not a challenge but a barrier).

To hope of finding a relationship with a Thai woman is also a risk if he is not a person who is in the direction of being somewhat whole (not perfect but reasonably formed within himself).

In the case of anyone who is on higher on the 'neediness scale' then this will override sense and good judgement, add to this the power of the dark eyed ladies and the risk of well-documented misadventure is increased.

He is vulnerable at his age to a few things that can become troubling for middle aged men whether he stays-put or travels here.

It is good he has someone such as you who takes interest in him and whom he has confided. By the sounds of it he doesn't have many of those people in his life.

Ex wives while nice to be friends with aren't much help in creating a life or expanding the life of an ex husband. I don't think it our children's job to do such things either. Love us yes but not to become our parents or counsellors.

Maybe some simple joining in in things he likes, might be curious about might be good for him e.g. join the surf life saving club, start local yoga classes, Toastmasters, volunteer for a charity some hours a week, go learn how to surf, join a running or cycling club. If he's not a physical person then encourage exercise and share maybe with him this and if he likes gardening, or chess, books there's lots of group things around this. The secret here, if there is one, is to make calculable forays into being with others (not family).

If he has no motivation and is disinterested, flat, unmotivated, negatively focused about outcomes and possibilities then this is ripe fruit for a good counsellor to explore with him. 

I think a professional is best to help explore what he wants and what he needs rather than friends, as we tend to be too close and promote what we think is best and suits another rather than support the person themselves finding out what's what for themselves.

Hope these thoughts and 30 years of experience are of help mate ????

[cardinalblue]

Thailand works best part time....

 

happiest guys I have noticed are the ones who return home or travel every year from Anywhere between one month to six months...

 

they have maintained a relationship usually with their home country and have kept a place to return to part time...

[talahtnut]

Steady on mate, do a couple of years here

on a couple of visas first, see how it goes.

Don't burn yer bridges yet.

I have an idea that the Ozzi pension ceases

after being away for a certain amount of time.

Worth checking that.

[Odysseus123]

10 hours ago, OneMoreFarang said:

It seems lots of people somehow think they must make a decision for the rest of their life. Why?

You are spot on.Flexibility is the key if you can possibly manage it.

 

Also avoid rigid dualistic thinking ie..Thailand good-homeland bad (or vice versa) and don't burn those bridges...you can just leave a plank across the stream if you like.

 

On a side issue but one that is still pertinent to this thread-i was visited by an Aussie friend who announced firmly that he wished to retire in Thailand so (having heard these stories many times before) I merely directed his attention to this forum (TvF) and said you can read all the good/bad and indifferent stuff you want at your own pace...

 

He has not looked at the forum to date and I doubt that he ever will..until things start to go wrong...

[CNXexpat]

With 10 million Baht only? He lived in a house in Australia, I guess he doesn´t want to live in a 35 sqm Condo in Thailand. Phuket is the most expensive place in Thailand. He needs a health insurance, perhaps he wants a car, I am sure he wants a good steak, a burger and some beers from time to time. For sure he wants to travel through the country. That´s not cheap. 

I relocated in the age of 55 with 20 million Baht and still had a 6 MB house (ok, on paper my wife), 2 cars and a scooter - and get yearly 1 million Baht in dividends. That makes me feel safe.

 

[daveAustin]

Some tripe on here mind. Folk like to talk-it-up, about their exploits and what you must have etc, much of which is parcelled off to love interests, kids, extended families and various superfluousness of course.... hmmm

 

Saw the other thread and commented that he'd be better off renting out his place then perhaps retiring on that. But I dunno.

 

C'mon guys, as a non-mongering singleton, one can easily live a comfy life in Muang Thai on a lot less than Oz certainly. You don't need millions upon millions. That 10mil could be good for 10-15 years. To a chap that is clearly not having the best of it, getting out and potentially living the dream than sit and languish (for what?) is quite logical. There is always money to be made online and that capital can be made to work.

 

At the end of the day, F the uncertainty! We're all dead anyway. When? 

[sidjameson]

What's better at 65 for this guy?

Having had 15 good years in Thailand and be broke but about to start to get his pension.

Having had 15 years of sadness and depression in Sydney but now having a pensipn, house and further savings?

[1FinickyOne]

26 minutes ago, sidjameson said:

Having had 15 good years in Thailand and be broke

Hey Sid... that is a big assumption - what if he blows it all in 5 years and they weren't very good either... sometimes miserable people find they are miserable wherever they are... 

[1FinickyOne]

37 minutes ago, daveAustin said:

We're all dead anyway. When? 

die soon sure. 

[BritManToo]

1 hour ago, daveAustin said:

C'mon guys, as a non-mongering singleton, one can easily live a comfy life in Muang Thai on a lot less than Oz certainly. You don't need millions upon millions. That 10mil could be good for 10-15 years. To a chap that is clearly not having the best of it, getting out and potentially living the dream than sit and languish (for what?) is quite logical. There is always money to be made online and that capital can be made to work.

 

At the end of the day, F the uncertainty! We're all dead anyway. When? 

I agree, I moved to Thailand after banging my first bar girl for a week or two.

So many posters living a life of fear, I'm surprised they ever manage to step outside their home.

I guess with COVID they probably won't any more.

Some spend so long planning and saving, they have no time left for living.

Never really worried that much about making money.

Edited May 19, 2020 by BritManToo

[pineapple01]

Heres a bit of controversy. If anyone here is financially effected by Covits. with the odd exeption you shouldn't have come here.

[OneMoreFarang]

7 hours ago, Odysseus123 said:

He has not looked at the forum to date and I doubt that he ever will..until things start to go wrong...

Long first Newbie post: I met this girl. She was different...……..

[HighPriority]

14 hours ago, BTB1977 said:

If he doesn't have a life back home , why would he have one here. Does he become more interesting once he gets off the plane? 

Maybe, but he will certainly become more hansum... ????

[kingdong]

9 hours ago, SiSePuede419 said:

There are 3 reasons it's wrong to retire in Thailand.

 

1. You think a relationship with an ex-bargirl will end well.

 

2. You think a relationship with an ex-bargirl will end well.

 

3. You think a relationship with an ex-bargirl will end well.

 

????????????

 

You might think you,'re having a relationship with a bargirl,to her it's just work.

[kingdong]

4 minutes ago, HighPriority said:

Maybe, but he will certainly become more hansum... ????

While he's money lasts,if he had any sense just have the edited highlights of a relationship,i.e the sex,not the full 15 rounds.

[OneMoreFarang]

4 minutes ago, kingdong said:

9 hours ago, SiSePuede419 said:

There are 3 reasons it's wrong to retire in Thailand.

 

1. You think a relationship with an ex-bargirl will end well.

 

2. You think a relationship with an ex-bargirl will end well.

 

3. You think a relationship with an ex-bargirl will end well.

 

????????????

 

You might think you,'re having a relationship with a bargirl,to her it's just work.

And then there are lots of people in this forum with happy relations with ex-bargirls.

Sure, there are also lots of unhappy relations - not only with bargirls.

[HighPriority]

12 hours ago, sidjameson said:

Very nice post.

What's the total cost per month for the live in carer? Sounds like a possibility for me.

My wife did it when she was younger and also for a short while after we married and were awaiting her visa to come to Oz. 
From memory it paid about 15-18k Baht. 24/7 sleeping/cooking/cleaning on demand ????

She did get about 3hrs a week where she could get out of the house...

Dunno how she did it !

[OneMoreFarang]

3 minutes ago, kingdong said:

While he's money lasts,if he had any sense just have the edited highlights of a relationship,i.e the sex,not the full 15 rounds.

It seems to me that most guys who fall in love with (bar)girls here fall in love because the girls are feminine and they are nice to the guys. They smile, bring you drinks, laugh about your jokes all day long. And then there is maybe 30 minutes sex a day. 

Many of us here had sex with lots of girls. Some good, some not so good, some great. And did we all stay with the girl with the great sex? Or one of the others with additional qualities. 

[kingdong]

4 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

It seems to me that most guys who fall in love with (bar)girls here fall in love because the girls are feminine and they are nice to the guys. They smile, bring you drinks, laugh about your jokes all day long. And then there is maybe 30 minutes sex a day. 

Many of us here had sex with lots of girls. Some good, some not so good, some great. And did we all stay with the girl with the great sex? Or one of the others with additional qualities. 

Dunno,either way you,'re falling in love and staying with a girl who's a prostitute,might be love to you it's a job to her.