Before You Go - The quintessential Thailand experiences bucket list

[Genmai]

It is with indescribable joy and anticipation that I am now making preparations to leave Thailand. In fact if it hadn't been for the WuFlu I would already have been enjoying greener pastures in March. However, this thread is not meant to be made in the spirit of "see ya suckers, enjoy your cesspit". There have been enough threads of that kind already.

 

Instead I would like to ask for advice from some of the more experienced members of this forum.

 

Regrettably it has come to my attention that I may not have used my few years in Thailand fully to experience all that this country has to offer. This is a thought that occurs frequently when my friends ask me all the expected questions about ladyboys, ping pong shows and elephants. Unfortunately I have to admit to them and myself that I've never been with a handsome big-titted well-endowed Jeffrey, or paid to see chicks shooting pingpong balls out of their orifices, or even ridden on top of an elephant. I've never availed myself of the services of a lady-of-the-night or any other such pay-for-play merriment. I came here already having a Thai girlfriend with the purpose of building a business together, which is what I have focused on during my brief stay here. 

 

As such I would like to use the last bit of my remaining time here in the kingdom to experience some things which are unique to it. Some of the stuff I'm thinking of doing is:

• Cooking class
• Multi-day jungle horse riding
• Trekking with overnight stays at hill-tribe villages

Can't think of any more right now. I would love if members could add to this list.

 

What would you consider to be some of the quintessential Thailand experiences that are a MUST? Are there sights or activities which defined your stay/time here? I'm open to trying pretty much everything (even the pay-for-play stuff if it's really that good - although I must admit I'm a skeptic and my gf services me very well in that regard already).

[swissie]

How much time do you have left in Thailand? Instead of chasing after "hidden jewels" recommended by the TAT or your neighborhood travel agency, head "upcountry". Somewhere, throw a dart at the Thai-Map. Any small Thai-Village will do. Rent a room from the wealthiest Thai-Family in the village. (200 Bht/Day). Stay at least 1 month. Will give you the best insight of what you may have missed (or can do without) in Thailand, instead of hopping all over Thailand, frantically looking for things that "you may have missed".
My recommendation. Be careful, you may not want to leave.

- Pointless if you don't speak basic Thai. Assuming that your GF can serve as a translator would make it possible. If not, forget all the above and go with the recommendations of your travel-agent.

[StreetCowboy]

A public holiday trip on the 40 Baht trains (I don't know if they still run)

 

Get blootered in a local karaoke place

 

Write your home address on a piece of card

 

Do those last two in the opposite order

 

SC

[daveAustin]

Get up to CM, rent a dirt bike and do the Mae Hong Son loop (via Samoeng back route to Pai). Not best time of though due to rain. For me, Thailand is at its best when off the beaten path alone (no wives, g/fs, kids, friends etc in tow) and getting into the country proper.

 

Hill tribe treks ok, though all a bit contrived plus dunno if they'd be running at this time. If you must do the paid girl thing, do it properly at one of the top soapies in Bangkok and have girl choose her friend for a menage a trois.   

 

Sadly, most visitors and long-termers don't actually get to bond with locals and do the 'real' Thailand, thus ending up with a jaded view and missing out on so much.

 

All the best.

[richard_smith237]

Having lived in Thailand for 20 years the Covid-19 crisis, the block on entry of foreigners to Thailand and consequent separation from my Family has given cause for a change in plans. Moving to the UK, the international nature of my work means I will never again be sure if I will be locked out of Thailand due to the latest 'virus', second wave of covid etc... That issue can be debated, but that's just my thoughts and in combination with a handful of other factors the UK is the better place to be.

 

Over the 20 years in Thailand there have been some standout memories... and very few regrets with regards to 'what I've done' in Thailand.

 

... the motorcycle trips and loops is one thing I'd like to do. But then I'd like to tour much of asia by motorcycle (difficult with a 6 year old and I dont want to be away from home for that long as I'm already away so much).

... A family trip then, a road trip throughout Thailand, its not quite the place for a Campervan (as per NZ), its often easier to fly direct to an area, hire a car and tour the area - we've done a lot of that.

... I've never visited Pai, perhaps thats one area which I should have visited sooner but still, I have no regrets in not going.

 

Some people may suggest 'get into remote areas' to see the real Thailand - I never understood that, the real Thailand is Thailand, all over, getting into the remote areas just shows to rural Thailand, remote Thailand, its pleasant, its simple and its relaxing, its part of Thailand.

 

Gogo bars, do your best to leave the moral compass at home and you'll have a better time.

 

Wherever you go, whatever you chose, remember to smile.

 

 

 

 

 

[AlexRich]

A few ideas:

 

A walk on the wild side ... might be a bit painful.

 

Cave exploring with the Mai Sai football team.

 

An evening on yaba.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Grusa]

If you are still here in November, and if it is allowed to defy Covid, the Elephant Round-up in Surin is a very badly publicised "must see". 

[pineapple01]

Swim with the Turds  of Patts Beach.

[sanuk711]

On 6/9/2020 at 3:40 AM, swissie said:

How much time do you have left in Thailand? Instead of chasing after "hidden jewels" recommended by the TAT or your neighborhood travel agency, head "upcountry". Somewhere, throw a dart at the Thai-Map. Any small Thai-Village will do. Rent a room from the wealthiest Thai-Family in the village. (200 Bht/Day). Stay at least 1 month. Will give you the best insight of what you may have missed (or can do without) in Thailand, instead of hopping all over Thailand, frantically looking for things that "you may have missed".
My recommendation. Be careful, you may not want to leave.

Swissiee .....I done with my wife once after bar hopping around, I thought I would get the hell out of Pattaya for a while...big Thai map on the wall , just throw it hon and we will head there next week......... So we spent the next 10 days behind the fridge..........

[Guderian]

Surely, SOMEBODY must dream of owning a bar beer in Pattaya before they exit left, lol?

[Genmai]

On 6/9/2020 at 3:40 AM, swissie said:

How much time do you have left in Thailand? Instead of chasing after "hidden jewels" recommended by the TAT or your neighborhood travel agency, head "upcountry". Somewhere, throw a dart at the Thai-Map. Any small Thai-Village will do. Rent a room from the wealthiest Thai-Family in the village. (200 Bht/Day). Stay at least 1 month. Will give you the best insight of what you may have missed (or can do without) in Thailand, instead of hopping all over Thailand, frantically looking for things that "you may have missed".
My recommendation. Be careful, you may not want to leave.

- Pointless if you don't speak basic Thai. Assuming that your GF can serve as a translator would make it possible. If not, forget all the above and go with the recommendations of your travel-agent.

 

A lot of people have suggested something like this in the past, the "real Thailand". Can somebody explain this to me? I live outside CM so I'm already well acquainted with aggressive stray dogs, mosquitoes, bad driving, alcoholics, poor infrastructure/service, garbage burning and boom boom parties until late. Always assumed "upcountry" would just mean more of the same? 

[Elkski]

sisters! better  yet twins!!

Edited June 11, 2020 by Elkski

[thaibeachlovers]

On 6/10/2020 at 6:49 AM, daveAustin said:

Get up to CM, rent a dirt bike and do the Mae Hong Son loop (via Samoeng back route to Pai). Not best time of though due to rain. For me, Thailand is at its best when off the beaten path alone (no wives, g/fs, kids, friends etc in tow) and getting into the country proper.

 

Hill tribe treks ok, though all a bit contrived plus dunno if they'd be running at this time. If you must do the paid girl thing, do it properly at one of the top soapies in Bangkok and have girl choose her friend for a menage a trois.   

 

Sadly, most visitors and long-termers don't actually get to bond with locals and do the 'real' Thailand, thus ending up with a jaded view and missing out on so much.

 

All the best.

I've done the MHS loop and the real deal "through the middle" short cut that most never see, but I'd never in a million years do it on a bike.

If the flowers are out they are supposed to be wonderful. Sadly I got divorced before I could do that.

 

If doing the threesome thing never pick both girls. If they don't like each other it's just disappointing. One must pick her friend.

 

If never been to a beach go somewhere like Haad Khom. Avoid Samui, Tao, big Koh Chang, Phuket like the plague.

 

IMO "bonding" with locals is vastly overrated, but LOS is best enjoyed with an attractive rented "translator".

[thaibeachlovers]

1 hour ago, Genmai said:

 

A lot of people have suggested something like this in the past, the "real Thailand". Can somebody explain this to me? I live outside CM so I'm already well acquainted with aggressive stray dogs, mosquitoes, bad driving, alcoholics, poor infrastructure/service, garbage burning and boom boom parties until late. Always assumed "upcountry" would just mean more of the same? 

You have no idea of what the real Thailand is like. You won't find it in cities or anywhere that everyone speaks English.

Try Chang Dao cave area, or Cave Lodge for a weekend.

[thaibeachlovers]

On 6/10/2020 at 7:53 AM, richard_smith237 said:

I've never visited Pai, perhaps thats one area which I should have visited sooner but still, I have no regrets in not going.

 

Some people may suggest 'get into remote areas' to see the real Thailand - I never understood that, the real Thailand is Thailand, all over, getting into the remote areas just shows to rural Thailand, remote Thailand, its pleasant, its simple and its relaxing, its part of Thailand.

 

Gogo bars, do your best to leave the moral compass at home and you'll have a better time.

 

Wherever you go, whatever you chose, remember to smile.

Pai is a bagpacker <deleted><deleted>. The good bits can be enjoyed while passing through to Cave Lodge or MHS.

 

The "real Thailand" is where not many farangs go, but you knew that. If they all speak English you ain't found it.

 

Since Puritanical Purachai gogos have been dead boring with horrid too loud noise instead of music and fat girls.

 

Why should we smile when they don't? However it does help to smile at the cops when stopped at one of the thousands of road blocks around the country. It also helps to have a Thai with you in case of accidents.

[thaibeachlovers]

43 minutes ago, Elkski said:

sisters! better  yet twins!!

Bet you've never done that. It's always better in imagination than reality.

[thaibeachlovers]

On 6/8/2020 at 9:44 PM, Genmai said:

paid to see chicks shooting pingpong balls out of their orifices,

They don't. That's an invention of western movie makers. TVF rules mean I can't be more specific.

[thaibeachlovers]

On 6/8/2020 at 9:44 PM, Genmai said:

As such I would like to use the last bit of my remaining time here in the kingdom to experience some things which are unique to it. Some of the stuff I'm thinking of doing is:

• Cooking class
• Multi-day jungle horse riding
• Trekking with overnight stays at hill-tribe villages

Can't think of any more right now. I would love if members could add to this list.

Thai cooking classes can be done probably any western country or off the internet. Don't bother wasting valuable time.

 

I've heard of all sorts of tours, but of jungle horse riding I have heard naught. A quick google search provides many results ( over 2 million ), but blurb like Explore the untouched jungle and mountain area around Chiang Mai on the back of a himalayan mountain horse. A 1-day horse trekking tour is the perfect way to experience the jungle in an unspoiled, authentic and.................... sets alarm bells off in my head. I've been on too many terrible Thai tours to believe anything they say without a lot of research.

 

Hill tribe trekking is a bagpacker fantasy that promises untouched by outsider hill tribe stays which is an obvious lie. You can do it of course, but don't expect anything amazing. A company called Track of the Tiger located north of Chiang Mai used to have well organised hill trekking and rafting, so well worth checking out to see if still operating.

 

In my opinion ( and what I used to do with my wife ) the way to see farang devoid Thailand is to drive north and look for the back roads. The hill roads between Phayao and the Mekong are delightful and there are many small guesthouses to stay at. Not a good idea to drive a normal car though. Pickup better and 4 wheel drive best.

 

 

[Odysseus123]

3 hours ago, Grusa said:

If you are still here in November, and if it is allowed to defy Covid, the Elephant Round-up in Surin is a very badly publicised "must see". 

Very good,