The ol: "I wait you darling"...but how long to keep it up?

[thaibeachlovers]

On 8/30/2020 at 7:23 AM, bermondburi said:

I wouldn't say trolling. I send my wife around 90k a month give or take a bit. 

 

Got 2 kids and a house to take care of, bills to pay etc. After all outgoings are paid there's probably only 65k left for food, going out etc. 

 

Just like the guy you mocked, it's my family, and I want them to live well. 

 

And just for the record, I met my wife when I had nothing, but as time has gone on we've been lucky in many respects, 15 years later and our lifestyle has changed accordingly. 

Ordinary Thai if married and both working has 2 kids and house etc, but lives on less than your family pays on going out.

 

65K for food and going out etc- pull the other one.

[bermondburi]

3 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Ordinary Thai if married and both working has 2 kids and house etc, but lives on less than your family pays on going out.

 

65K for food and going out etc- pull the other one. 

I don't get what you don't believe. That I'm sending that money or they're spending that money. 

 

If it's the latter it's really not that hard. You mentioned ordinary Thais, well the family probably doesn't live an ordinary lifestyle compared to many. 

 

They live very well. It's easy enough to spend 5-10k a week at the supermarket, so that's half gone already. 2 dogs to feed as well. Kids are teenagers. They need things like clothes etc. Then there is actual going out for meals or drinks etc, plus travel to somewhere for a weekend. It all ends up. 

 

Sorry our lifestyle doesn't conform to your spending standards. ????

[pookondee]

8 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

The P4P scene is WHY they are still married. If they didn't have that they'd have dumped their loveless and sexless marriage long ago, IMO.

I presume you are referring to the western wife/marriages here?

 

Please dont be tellin me Thai wives end up that way also??

555

[pookondee]

On 8/30/2020 at 5:23 AM, bermondburi said:

I wouldn't say trolling. I send my wife around 90k a month give or take a bit. 

 

Got 2 kids and a house to take care of, bills to pay etc. After all outgoings are paid there's probably only 65k left for food, going out etc. 

 

Just like the guy you mocked, it's my family, and I want them to live well. 

 

And just for the record, I met my wife when I had nothing, but as time has gone on we've been lucky in many respects, 15 years later and our lifestyle has changed accordingly. 

I dont think i really mocked anyone.

Its good luck for you guys if y'all on big enough $ to sustain that sort of budget indefinately.

 

As time progresses, i suppose expenses change, kids schooling is finished, and then they are gone, less expenses, and so on.

It depends on your age and earning ability.

 

From my calculations, you are actually giving away the equivalent of a months salary for a high end English teacher in Thailand ( maybe even university lecturer)

so you would have to be earning at least double that in whatever you are doing.

 

So when retiring, on those figures, you'd need to have aside

200k per month x 20-30 years to see you out in that sort of lifestyle scenario.

 

Again, good luck to you if that's the plan.

 

Im not mocking, but the major problem id be thinking about is having a Thai partner getting used to that lifestyle and those spending habits.

 

From what I've heard and seen, they just

don't handle it very well, if accustomed to a certain lifestyle, then told they have to throttle it down later on.

 

The old guys used to give their wives 80% of their salary and tell em that was everything. (20% cunning kit)

So It was then understood that that was ALL they had, and they had to make the budget themselves on that amount.

 

I always thought that might be the way id go if in that situation in Thailand.

 

But good luck to you Sir, however you go. 

 

 

[bermondburi]

6 hours ago, pookondee said:

I dont think i really mocked anyone.

Its good luck for you guys if y'all on big enough $ to sustain that sort of budget indefinately.

 

As time progresses, i suppose expenses change, kids schooling is finished, and then they are gone, less expenses, and so on.

It depends on your age and earning ability.

 

From my calculations, you are actually giving away the equivalent of a months salary for a high end English teacher in Thailand ( maybe even university lecturer)

so you would have to be earning at least double that in whatever you are doing.

 

So when retiring, on those figures, you'd need to have aside

200k per month x 20-30 years to see you out in that sort of lifestyle scenario.

 

Again, good luck to you if that's the plan.

 

Im not mocking, but the major problem id be thinking about is having a Thai partner getting used to that lifestyle and those spending habits.

 

From what I've heard and seen, they just

don't handle it very well, if accustomed to a certain lifestyle, then told they have to throttle it down later on.

 

The old guys used to give their wives 80% of their salary and tell em that was everything. (20% cunning kit)

So It was then understood that that was ALL they had, and they had to make the budget themselves on that amount.

 

I always thought that might be the way id go if in that situation in Thailand.

 

But good luck to you Sir, however you go. 

 

 

Well I don't know about indefinitely because circumstances change, but we wouldn't be on skid row if they did. 

 

Absolutely things change over time. And school fees are a major expense. And that's over 30k a month that I didn't include previously. Should be moving the family to the UK in a couple of years though and then that expense will be gone. 

 

Without going into too much detail, but yeah, I earn over 200k a month, and I probably save about 100k after sending money to the family, and my own expenses which are minimal. 

 

It's difficult to say exactly how much is enough in retirement, but if it was just me and my wife right now I'd have thought 60-80k a month would be enough. I'm not looking to retire anytime soon though. I'm early 40s now so not for at least another 15 years. 

 

The good thing about my wife and I is that we both know where we come from, and we've both been poor. Both separately before we knew each other and together, especially when the children were born. There were some really tough times back then, having to borrow 1000 baht from my wife's sister to get us through etc. I know we can live a simple life again if needed. The kids though!! 555 That might be a different story. LOL. 

 

 

 

 

[thaibeachlovers]

21 hours ago, bermondburi said:

I don't get what you don't believe. That I'm sending that money or they're spending that money. 

 

If it's the latter it's really not that hard. You mentioned ordinary Thais, well the family probably doesn't live an ordinary lifestyle compared to many. 

 

They live very well. It's easy enough to spend 5-10k a week at the supermarket, so that's half gone already. 2 dogs to feed as well. Kids are teenagers. They need things like clothes etc. Then there is actual going out for meals or drinks etc, plus travel to somewhere for a weekend. It all ends up. 

 

Sorry our lifestyle doesn't conform to your spending standards. ????

Looks like they won the lottery with you. Does she get down on her knees at the foot of your bed every night to thank the Buddha for sending you, like bargirls back in the day did for a good farang ATM ( sadly a custom that is no longer done )?

 

I wonder if your wife has a job to contribute to the family finances. Mine did, and she worked hard for her money too.

[thaibeachlovers]

On 8/30/2020 at 7:23 AM, bermondburi said:

Got 2 kids and a house to take care of, bills to pay etc. After all outgoings are paid there's probably only 65k left for food, going out etc. 

If I seemed a bit hard on you it was because of ONLY as in there's probably only 65k left for food, going out etc. as though that was being hard done by.

That's more than the average Thai family has to live on for everything- used to be 9,000 a month, but probably a bit more now, though hardly approaching 65,000.

At least once the kids grow up they can get a job and move out, can't they?

[BritManToo]

10 hours ago, bermondburi said:

Absolutely things change over time. And school fees are a major expense. And that's over 30k a month that I didn't include previously. Should be moving the family to the UK in a couple of years though and then that expense will be gone. 

School isn't all that much in Thailand,

6kbht/term (1k/month) for my 8 year old in Junior school.

12kbht/term (2k/month) for my 23 year old at university.

 

Let's hope all that money isn't supporting a Thai husband.

I've known a few doing exactly that.

Edited September 1, 2020 by BritManToo

[kingofthemountain]

7 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Let's hope all that money isn't supporting a Thai husband.

I've known a few doing exactly that.

Or a bad addiction like play cards with ''friends''

it seems a lot of the foreigners Thai wifes and gf

lose tons of money at this game.

[BritManToo]

17 hours ago, pookondee said:

The old guys used to give their wives 80% of their salary and tell em that was everything. (20% cunning kit)

So It was then understood that that was ALL they had, and they had to make the budget themselves on that amount.

 

I always thought that might be the way id go if in that situation in Thailand.

Old guy here ........

I pay a Thai woman 10k/month to pretend she loves me.

I always thought that was enough, it wasn't as if there was ever a shortage of applicants for the job at that price.

Edited September 1, 2020 by BritManToo

[pookondee]

6 hours ago, BritManToo said:

Old guy here ........

I pay a Thai woman 10k/month to pretend she loves me.

I always thought that was enough, it wasn't as if there was ever a shortage of applicants for the job at that price.

I hear you.

I fear that Inflation might catch up to us soon though.

[BritManToo]

5 minutes ago, pookondee said:

I hear you.

I fear that Inflation might catch up to us soon though.

Quite frankly, her body is losing value faster than inflation increases her worth to me.

I'd be happy enough if she called it quits.

[pookondee]

24 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Quite frankly, her body is losing value faster than inflation increases her worth to me.

I'd be happy enough if she called it quits.

 

There's could be automobile referance in there.

It must work out better to get a new model, than replace all the parts.

555

 

[bermondburi]

10 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

If I seemed a bit hard on you it was because of ONLY as in there's probably only 65k left for food, going out etc. as though that was being hard done by.

That's more than the average Thai family has to live on for everything- used to be 9,000 a month, but probably a bit more now, though hardly approaching 65,000.

At least once the kids grow up they can get a job and move out, can't they?

Yeah, I see your point about the ONLY. I didn't mean it like that though. More just to show that a big chunk of the original 90k went quick. 

 

Absolutely re the kids. After uni we're done. My job is over. And both my wife and I are on the same page here. They can support themselves. I want to relax a bit. 

[bermondburi]

8 hours ago, BritManToo said:

School isn't all that much in Thailand,

6kbht/term (1k/month) for my 8 year old in Junior school.

12kbht/term (2k/month) for my 23 year old at university.

 

Let's hope all that money isn't supporting a Thai husband.

I've known a few doing exactly that.

Different types of schools, different types of prices. We all know there's a whole range of options out there. If my children had better written thai I might consider different options, but they lived outside Thailand for 6 years with me in the Gulf. It is what it is. You make the best choices with the funds available. 

 

I have zero worries about another man BTW. 

[bermondburi]

8 hours ago, kingofthemountain said:

Or a bad addiction like play cards with ''friends''

it seems a lot of the foreigners Thai wifes and gf

lose tons of money at this game.

Ditto zero worries about that. 

 

Worse trait for a Thai women to have imo gambling. Worse then alcohol or drugs. 

[kingofthemountain]

6 minutes ago, bermondburi said:

Ditto zero worries about that. 

 

Worse trait for a Thai women to have imo gambling. Worse then alcohol or drugs. 

True

the problem with the gambling is you can never know

or be sure about your partner, because there is no any 

outside sign with the behavior or physic transformation

like you have with the alcohol or drug,

Then when you discover the reality it's often too late

and the accumulation of debts are usually huge.

I hope for you she is not into it, because she has the ''perfect'' profil

(You are not all the time with her, she has a lot of free time and a lot

of ''easy'' money to spend, and she is probably boring during the long hours

when the kids are at school)

[bermondburi]

3 minutes ago, kingofthemountain said:

True

the problem with the gambling is you can never know

or be sure about your partner, because there is no any 

outside sign with the behavior or physic transformation

like you have with the alcohol or drug,

Then when you discover the reality it's often too late

and the accumulation of debts are usually huge.

I hope for you she is not into it, because she has the ''perfect'' profil

(You are not all the time with her, she has a lot of free time and a lot

of ''easy'' money to spend, and she is probably boring during the long hours

when the kids are at school)

And she's also not stupid, so we can put that one to bed. 

[kingofthemountain]

2 minutes ago, bermondburi said:

And she's also not stupid, so we can put that one to bed. 

If you think that only stupid people can fall in the gambling trap

you are deluding yourself. 

 

[bermondburi]

36 minutes ago, kingofthemountain said:

If you think that only stupid people can fall in the gambling trap

you are deluding yourself. 

 

Wasn't referring to her IQ, but anyways.... 

 

I do know her quite well. Better then random people off t'internet. ????????????

[473geo]

 

Oh boy how to explain to some here that those of us who take good care of our wife, are fully aware of the possible traits in women that could spell disaster. We are in the fortunate position of having a wife that does not possess these particular traits, hence we take good care of these exceptional women, who in turn take good care of us.

 

Although myself I do like to put the occasional bet on football or the lottery, so not quite perfect ???? one of the perks of working outside Thailand

[thaibeachlovers]

5 hours ago, 473geo said:

 

Oh boy how to explain to some here that those of us who take good care of our wife, are fully aware of the possible traits in women that could spell disaster. We are in the fortunate position of having a wife that does not possess these particular traits, hence we take good care of these exceptional women, who in turn take good care of us.

 

Although myself I do like to put the occasional bet on football or the lottery, so not quite perfect ???? one of the perks of working outside Thailand

My wife was perfect for the year we lived together. After we got married it was all downhill to divorce. We never really know another person, no matter how we fool ourselves that we do.

[BritManToo]

6 hours ago, 473geo said:

Oh boy how to explain to some here that those of us who take good care of our wife, are fully aware of the possible traits in women that could spell disaster. We are in the fortunate position of having a wife that does not possess these particular traits, hence we take good care of these exceptional women, who in turn take good care of us.

All women are driven by the same instincts.

Expecting one to behave differently is almost certainly a losing bet ........ in the end.

[kingofthemountain]

10 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

We never really know another person, no matter how we fool ourselves that we do.

Yes, that ^^^

[thaibeachlovers]

On 9/2/2020 at 11:27 AM, BritManToo said:

All women are driven by the same instincts.

Expecting one to behave differently is almost certainly a losing bet ........ in the end.

All men wanting to get married should watch the Julia Roberts movie Eat, Pray, Love in which her character walks out on her husband just because she wanted to "find herself". She destroyed another person just because she was selfish and bored.

I know real life women that divorced their husband because they were bored, despite promising in church to stay married till death...........................

[bermondburi]

On 9/2/2020 at 1:17 AM, thaibeachlovers said:

My wife was perfect for the year we lived together. After we got married it was all downhill to divorce. I never really knew my wife, no matter how I fooled myself that I did.

FTFY. ????

 

Judging half the global population based on your own experience.... ????

[bermondburi]

On 9/2/2020 at 2:27 AM, BritManToo said:

All women are driven by the same instincts.

Expecting one to behave differently is almost certainly a losing bet ........ in the end.

All women?? In the whole world?? 

Where do you come up with this stuff. 

 

I'm 99.9% sure that you and me are not driven by the same things. Why should it be any different for women. You're giving more insights into your own narrowmindedness then anything about women really. 

[BritManToo]

3 minutes ago, bermondburi said:

All women?? In the whole world?? 

Where do you come up with this stuff. 

 

I'm 99.9% sure that you and me are not driven by the same things. Why should it be any different for women. You're giving more insights into your own narrowmindedness then anything about women really. 

Men are more biologically diverse than women with their choices of breeding strategy.

Because we don't have to carry the baby for 9 months and then feed it, we have options.

 

You can go from the soft guy that has one baby with a woman and supports it, or Genghis Khan (my personal hero) that inseminates every woman he meets and just leaves them. Sorry you don't basic understand mammal biology, I can't really explain it for you.

Edited September 3, 2020 by BritManToo

[bermondburi]

1 hour ago, BritManToo said:

Men are more biologically diverse than women with their choices of breeding strategy.

Because we don't have to carry the baby for 9 months and then feed it, we have options.

 

You can go from the soft guy that has one baby with a woman and supports it, or Genghis Khan (my personal hero) that inseminates every woman he meets and just leaves them. Sorry you don't basic understand mammal biology, I can't really explain it for you.

????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Any other insights into the human psyche you want to share? 

 

Wow. 

[thaibeachlovers]

21 hours ago, bermondburi said:

All women?? In the whole world?? 

Where do you come up with this stuff. 

 

I'm 99.9% sure that you and me are not driven by the same things. Why should it be any different for women. You're giving more insights into your own narrowmindedness then anything about women really. 

Everything we do is driven by genetic imperatives. Genetic imperatives are the same for every animal, and we are animals with a bigger brain, but still driven to reproduce. Choosing not to reproduce is only possible because we have free will to go against genetic conditioning.

Mating, making a nest ( buying/ renting a house ), raising the children are all genetic imperatives and everything we do stems from them, IMO. My genetic imperative only went as far as mating and nest building, because I chose not to reproduce.