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Fair or unfair?

Featured Replies

4 hours ago, kingofthemountain said:

i am always surprised by the love leading most of the farang\thais couples

I'm a pragmatist, Thai women want support. Why else would they hook up with a farang 20, 30, or 40 years older than them?

Having said that, my GF looks after me very well, does everything for me. Cooks, cleans, does my laundry, never has a headache. I'd be pushing the proverbial uphill to get that back in Australia.

There are four attributes women are attracted to in men. Physique/handsome, intelligence, power, and money. The last is probably the most effective.

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  • Christ man, you are a stingy one for sure/. they bring some meat and your wife cooks it and you bemoan the cost of gas, oil, spices, etc.  Maybe their lively hood has been affected by the cv19 crisis

  • The family unit is everything to Thais. If you don't understand that after 15 years here, you are a slow learner. No doubt you expect your wife and son to look after you when you are no longer ab

  • If it's such a problem to you, cut off the money or supply of goods. A gas cylinder can always be empty when they come calling. I'd advise talking to your wife first, though. My GF has loyalty to

12 hours ago, Formaleins said:

Good philosophy, the God of Thailand is MONEY!

Could it be your God also?  Reads like it is.

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Are you of Scottish decent?

If you like em, let em. If you don't like em, tell em you prefer to be on your own.

14 hours ago, Formaleins said:

Been here for over 15 years, I have a 19 year old boy

Over 15 years = 20?

If they are showing up every night the food must be real good. Maybe if you have some other friends you could go to their house for supper for about a week so they might get the message and not come anymore. Failing that, some sand in their food might work. Who knows? Have you tried locking your doors and windows?

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I guess there is a plus to every story................They have not moved into your house......... yet.........

Just offer them a cake laced with strong laxatives 

The message should sink in  ????

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7 hours ago, Lacessit said:

I'm a pragmatist, Thai women want support. Why else would they hook up with a farang 20, 30, or 40 years older than them?

Having said that, my GF looks after me very well, does everything for me. Cooks, cleans, does my laundry, never has a headache. I'd be pushing the proverbial uphill to get that back in Australia.

There are four attributes women are attracted to in men. Physique/handsome, intelligence, power, and money. The last is probably the most effective.

My wife fell for me as I am a velly hansum man  ????

I think she has an urgent need to visit spec savers  :cheesy:

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2 minutes ago, Grumpy one said:

My wife fell for me as I am a velly hansum man  ????

I think she has an urgent need to visit spec savers  :cheesy:

I guess if you don't love yourself, nobody else will.

Most Thai women can pick the difference in baht bill denominations from 50 metres away.

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2 minutes ago, Lacessit said:

I guess if you don't love yourself, nobody else will.

Most Thai women can pick the difference in baht bill denominations from 50 metres away.

Mine can smell when money is transferred to my account  

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14 hours ago, AlexRich said:

It doesn’t sound like something you should get too worked up about. If they are decent people and you get on well with them then let it go. Unless of course it is a major drain on your resources, but I’m not sure it is? Your priority quite correctly is your own son. 

The OP mentioned they only recently started coming every evening and from the other details seems that they have been in the close area for many years but never bothered the OP for cash or anything else.

 

My guess is that the Covid 19 situation has now strongly depleted their resources. Letting them 'borrow' enough gas to cook a meal, some spices etc., is just family sharing IMHO.

 

Be thankful them don't ask for a lot more.  

15 hours ago, Formaleins said:

You have to be kidding, the only thing a Thai would do is pay for the funeral and keep the proceeds! They have no loyalty to anyone other than money.

OMG! Where have you dropped anchor?

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Irrespective of the small amount of personal cost to the OP, he should be more concerned about breaking this habitual ritual. Otherwise, there is no end in sight, and this couple are likely to become permanent fixtures in his home.

 

It is already preying on his mind quite significantly. Imagine what his mental anguish will be like in a year or two if this continues.

 

No question, he needs to urgently discuss the seriousness of the matter with the wife, and get her to do the dirty work with her kith and kin, restoring harmony to the home.

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my two cents here... i don’t *really* think it’s about the money, the food etc... it’s really about something else...

 

So, IF that’s the case, then i think you really need to get on with it, bring it up (or decide that it’s not worth it abs accept it without carrying that “baggage” around) and get to a solution you both find acceptable.

 

Maybe it’s something like you’ve not been asked of it’s ok that they come over... maybe it’s the frequency that really is the trigger for you... could be lots of things... but honestly, i don’t think it’s truly about the hard costs - the fuel use etc... that is guess is just the manifestation of the underlying problem.

 

 

Another reason I won’t live in Moobaan

My concern would not be over the expense for every night dinner but whether this was a prelude to them staying with you. But then you don't state their or your, living accommodation so what I have just written may be assuming too much. Do the visitors have accommodation which is good or is yours bigger and better? No one knows your situation better than you but if it were me I might try joining, and my family too, which possibly might turn out to be enjoyable or perhaps the visitors might find their own reasons for not coming so often.

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16 hours ago, Formaleins said:

The food is the usual Northern Thai slop, the slight amount of meat is bought by them, however, all of the gas, electric, spices, oils etc. is at my expense....What would be the best way to tell them to pay up or <deleted> Off? 

Lock the door and turn-off the lights.

18 minutes ago, hotchilli said:

Lock the door and turn-off the lights.

The party seems like it was over a long time ago.

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16 hours ago, Formaleins said:

I Think you must be my wife!

 

(It is not the fact  of them using resources, but they cook everything  and eat it themselves, there is nothing left for my son or anyone else, and they takeaway whatever is left! They live with my wifes mother for free,  sponge off her (she is 80+ and they like the smell of the 2 million Baht she got from a land sale....no, these people are leeches!

That's not what you told in your first story maybe you should have . In the first part it just looked like they came over for dinner used some of your spices and gas and ate with you and your familie . Next time you should write the whole story before calling someone your wife because he just stated the obvious . 

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15 hours ago, 2long said:

15 years

Must be 60+

Troll alert, says I

Nope Formaleins is not a troll..he might be one very angry gnome tho!

 

I love this "let's go to Thailand and hand over the money/goods to the spongers-it's their culture!

 

It is so rib ticklingly humorous-rather like being a cargo cult worshipper and having the can of spam land on your head from on high.

 

The OP certainly needs to draw a line but it is best to so in a calm way and without the flintlock musket loaded and cocked by his side.

 

Most Thai I meet in OZ are total tightwads who would never-repeat never-hand over gratuitous money/goods/food to Australians or their families.Buuuuut...they certainly expected me to do so in Thailand.Glad that's gone...

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It seems to me by reading your qoutes you have everything sorted out already so i don't understand why you are asking other people if it's FAIR OR UNFAIR . Seems to me you've got it all figured out by yourself . Don't ask other peoples opinions if you can't handle their answers . 

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Slop? This is what my GF cooks for me - omelet, kaow pat goong, pad pat ruam with fish, mussuman curry.

Perhaps a spot of training is in order, or don't you know how to cook for yourself?

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IMG20200612191834.jpg

IMG20200522193533.jpg

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17 hours ago, Formaleins said:

Recently, they seem to think it is a good idea to come to our home every night at 8 or 9 pm and have dinner.

Nutritionally and Digestively, no one should eat a meal at least 4 hours before bed.  Just tell them you dont cook after 6 and dont eat after 7pm.  Problem solved

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17 hours ago, Formaleins said:

 

 

, but they cook everything  and eat it themselves,

 

16 hours ago, Formaleins said:

 expect your mother to cook for a 40 year old couple at your expense? 

 

Well we didn't even get off the first page before the story changed....

 

Complaint smells like troll excrement.

 

Protip.... you gunna make a troll thread don't forget what lies you post.

17 hours ago, Formaleins said:

What would you do?

Been here for over 15 years, I have a 19 year old boy that needs a bit of support, he has a job and in general takes care of himself, needs a motorbike for work, I keep him fed as Thai wages are not fantastic, don't ask for board and lodging, after all he is my responsibility.

 

However, and here comes the reason for the post - My Thai wife for whatever reason (has a <deleted> son from previous sex) who is now 40 or older, he is married / living with a Thai lady of similar age, 40+

 

Recently, they seem to think it is a good idea to come to our home every night at 8 or 9 pm and have dinner.

 

The food is the usual Northern Thai slop, the slight amount of meat is bought by them, however, all of the gas, electric, spices, oils etc. is at my expense....What would be the best way to tell them to pay up or <deleted> Off? 

 

I am getting old, long in the tooth, limited income, I support my Son, Wife and myself, but there is no way I am feeding two other 40 year old spoiled brats that cannot feed themselves. best way forward, least confrontation, I don't really want to shoot them.....but you never know!

Ask them to come a little earlier and bring more meat so you can join them ..or cook something for them !! Roast beef and Yorkshire puds ... it maybe the Thai thing but also nice to have company perhaps they also have an issue at the moment in these hard times ... ..  don't shoot them or your food quality will be even worse in jail.

5 hours ago, cucme said:

Are you of Scottish decent?

If you like em, let em. If you don't like em, tell em you prefer to be on your own.

If he is Scottish, he could wear a Scottish skirt (kilt) and his horrible hairy legs would put them of their food. ????????????????????????????

3 hours ago, ravip said:

OMG! Where have you dropped anchor?

 

I think it was dropped on his own head!

 

This type of person is going to have a miserable life in Thailand, and even worse, his death is going to either be of a sudden heart attack, or some other type of attack.

 

He needs to go back home now.

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25 minutes ago, CanadaSam said:

 

I think it was dropped on his own head!

 

This type of person is going to have a miserable life in Thailand, and even worse, his death is going to either be of a sudden heart attack, or some other type of attack.

 

He needs to go back home now.

read his posts in this thread, he is trolling.

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2 hours ago, Lacessit said:

Slop? This is what my GF cooks for me - omelet, kaow pat goong, pad pat ruam with fish, mussuman curry.

Perhaps a spot of training is in order, or don't you know how to cook for yourself?

IMG20200613090431.jpg

IMG20200612191834.jpg

IMG20200522193533.jpg

IMG20200530123422.jpg

tails on the prawns....divorce material right there.

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I don’t buy into this family unit bs .. my MIL and SIL along with her distant cousin have started down this rocky path before. Yeah, we are a family, one unit, whatever is mine is yours and while we are on it, can we all have a whip around? We would like to build a house - if you all put in say 250k, my parents have given us a million as a wedding gift,  I will stump up the rest. Suddenly it’s all “Mai mee thang” - it’s a one way door.

 

However, I feel the OP is being petty taking into consideration the gas, the spices, etc .. if it were me, I would think that it was an invasion of privacy. At 40, they should appear in a Sunday and take you out for lunch, not being dependent upon your wife to cook for them.

 

I have had this feeling in the past, where you feel uncomfortable and unsettled in your own home, it’s not nice - like you say, you are at an age where you don’t need this aggravation. I don’t know how you can solve your problem.

 

 

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