Can you live independently?

[Mac Mickmanus]

53 minutes ago, georgegeorgia said:

im getting by this topic,there are a lot of "needy" type guys who cant live by themselves or more importantly ..be by themselves because they get lonely.

 

I saw "Sammyn " post above...86yo and still takes care of himself...but different generation where they had to look after themselves and learned to do that

 

unfortanetely with the latest Generation they have been conditioned to be "needy" and rely on others ,i even see this in workplaces where people cant be by themselves ,they want to be near you, stick their noses in your life,and get upset if they cant be in it, they get easily offended and even upset if you dont say good morning to them.

 

some of them they cant work in a workplace without some "reassurance" by boss/superviser   etc ,eg they get upset if the boss/superviser doesnt say hello/good morning etc ,they think somethings wrong, they need to converse with the superviser in private conversation before or after their work shift to get that reassurance that everything is ok,that they are liked 

 

with "unneedy " people (if thats a word) they dont give a flying F and just go to work and do their job then go home 

 

how many times you at the gym there are a lot of treadmills empty,someone chooses the one next to yours ,you on a bus or train,someone sits near you ,because they are needy people

I do think that some people NEED a Woman , they just have to be in a relationship and they cannot stand to be single .

   They then begin a relationship with the first person they can get , first single girl they meet and thats it *She's a keeper* .

   They are too impatient to wait for something decent to come along 

[thaibeachlovers]

2 hours ago, 473geo said:

I think your level of expectation may have been a bit off, compounded by lacking the means or ability to reset it.

 

I'm always amazed by other posters that think they "know" me.

 

Just in case you didn't get the hint you are 100% wrong.

[Kwasaki]

1 hour ago, Mac Mickmanus said:

I do think that some people NEED a Woman , they just have to be in a relationship and they cannot stand to be single .

   They then begin a relationship with the first person they can get , first single girl they meet and thats it *She's a keeper* .

   They are too impatient to wait for something decent to come along 

What kind of person would that be, are you a guru or what qualifies you to state that.? 

[473geo]

7 minutes ago, thaibeachlovers said:

I'm always amazed by other posters that think they "know" me.

 

Just in case you didn't get the hint you are 100% wrong.

I think I have read enough of your posts over the years to gain a little knowledge ???? You have mellowed a bit lately though.

The example of the relative using your home against your wishes springs to mind to support my comment. Thailand and Thai women can throw some curve balls not everyone has the ability to deal with them, your solution to the situation suited you which is fine. Not many people are prepared to admit somebody may have been able to handle things better. 

 

[473geo]

Struggling to fit 'sharing the untold pleasures of life with someone' into the 'being needy' slot.

[scubascuba3]

3 hours ago, georgegeorgia said:

im getting by this topic,there are a lot of "needy" type guys who cant live by themselves or more importantly ..be by themselves because they get lonely.

I

You're getting a bit hung up on the "needy" thing, some people are naturally friendly and talking to other people is normal and not needy. You get guys who think it's normal to not say hello, not be friendly or worse are hot and cold with the friendliness, i find that weird.

 

As for hospitals and someone to take care when sick, if I'm single which is likely, i will pay one of my female friends to look after me for the duration, so it's good keeping friendly with some

[scubascuba3]

2 hours ago, Mac Mickmanus said:

I do think that some people NEED a Woman , they just have to be in a relationship and they cannot stand to be single .

   They then begin a relationship with the first person they can get , first single girl they meet and thats it *She's a keeper* .

   They are too impatient to wait for something decent to come along 

The other thing that happens frequently is as well as committing too quickly they can't end it, its quite hard to shake them sometimes

[Kwasaki]

3 minutes ago, scubascuba3 said:

 You get guys who think it's normal to not say hello, not be friendly or worse are hot and cold.

What's wrong with that pray tell.

I can be whatever I want to be not not something you expect me to be. 

[473geo]

1 minute ago, Kwasaki said:

What's wrong with that pray tell.

I can be whatever I want to be not not something you expect me to be. 

Needy if you make conversation, rude if you don't

 

I guess just being you is the easiest most suitable option ????

[scubascuba3]

6 minutes ago, Kwasaki said:

What's wrong with that pray tell.

I can be whatever I want to be not not something you expect me to be. 

you not think that's weird? being unfriendly? or friendly one day, unfriendly the next? seems like personality swings to me

[Kwasaki]

1 minute ago, 473geo said:

Needy if you make conversation, rude if you don't

 

I guess just being you is the easiest most suitable option ????

Being independent and knowing yourself is very important or you might try to be like some of the the members on ANF. ????????????????????

[rott]

On 9/2/2021 at 6:06 PM, scubascuba3 said:

Don't worry about me, i have to fight them off

The simplest strategy for that battle is to stop paying them. 

[Kwasaki]

3 minutes ago, scubascuba3 said:

you not think that's weird? being unfriendly? or friendly one day, unfriendly the next? seems like personality swings to me

No. 

[scubascuba3]

16 minutes ago, rott said:

The simplest strategy for that battle is to stop paying them. 

I'm talking about free ones

[scubascuba3]

17 minutes ago, Kwasaki said:

No. 

I've noticed on this thread people trying to normalise weird behaviour

[georgegeorgia]

5 minutes ago, scubascuba3 said:

I've noticed on this thread people trying to normalise weird behaviour

Depends what it means "weird " to you.....i personally dislike "needy" /dependant " people who try to latch onto me .

it happens in my workplace where a few times where im usually working with a colleague who wants to talk about personal things .

For eg i met a new colleague last week and the first question he asked me was.."have you had the vaccine jab yet"?

 

immediately i looked at him and said ..."I dont answer personal questions !!

 

same with the ones on monday "how was your weekend?

i tell them the same,afterawhile they stop asking ,they get the message not to stick their nose in my business

 

 

Edited September 5, 2021 by georgegeorgia

[scubascuba3]

3 minutes ago, georgegeorgia said:

Depends what it means "weird " to you.....i personally dislike "needy" /dependant " people who try to latch onto me .

it happens in my workplace where a few times where im usually working with a colleague who wants to talk about personal things .

For eg i met a new colleague last week and the first question he asked me was.."have you had the vaccine jab yet"?

 

immediately i looked at him and said ..."I dont answer personal questions !!

 

same with the ones on monday "how was your weekend?

i tell them the same,afterawhile they stop asking ,they get the message not to stick their nose in my business

 

 

like i said, weird behaviour, but you think it's normal. Wow a colleague who enquires about personal things......

[rott]

13 minutes ago, georgegeorgia said:

Depends what it means "weird " to you.....i personally dislike "needy" /dependant " people who try to latch onto me .

it happens in my workplace where a few times where im usually working with a colleague who wants to talk about personal things .

For eg i met a new colleague last week and the first question he asked me was.."have you had the vaccine jab yet"?

 

immediately i looked at him and said ..."I dont answer personal questions !!

 

same with the ones on monday "how was your weekend?

i tell them the same,afterawhile they stop asking ,they get the message not to stick their nose in my business

 

 

Could it be that you are mistaking casual, light conversation and innocuous comments with nosiness and intrusive behaviour.?

Though obviously I cannot put their approaches into any context. 

Edited September 5, 2021 by rott
Punctuation.

[RJRS1301]

9 minutes ago, georgegeorgia said:

Depends what it means "weird " to you.....i personally dislike "needy" /dependant " people who try to latch onto me .

it happens in my workplace where a few times where im usually working with a colleague who wants to talk about personal things .

For eg i met a new colleague last week and the first question he asked me was.."have you had the vaccine jab yet"?

 

immediately i looked at him and said ..."I dont answer personal questions !!

 

same with the ones on monday "how was your weekend?

i tell them the same,afterawhile they stop asking ,they get the message not to stick their nose in my business

 

 

Curmudgeon ???? 

[473geo]

Wow judging by the recent self proclaimed unwillingness to share such minimal inconsequential information, I am thinking I must be very sociable indeed ???? Not that I 'need' to be sociable but polite I feel is good. ????

[zzaa09]

1 hour ago, RJRS1301 said:

Curmudgeon ???? 

Can only be a good thing. 

Add a kindling of misanthropy with it.

[rott]

2 hours ago, scubascuba3 said:

like i said, weird behaviour, but you think it's normal. Wow a colleague who enquires about personal things......

He starts off open and gregarious, then turns anti-social. 

[EricTh]

On 9/1/2021 at 12:35 PM, CharlieH said:

Well, I think everyone needs someone, more so as you age. The nature of the "need" is what varies by person and situation.

The fear I think as you age is "what happens if......." fill in the blank with a scenario, sickness accident  problems of some sort, etc.

 

After the years I have been here I would have no problem living alone but it wouldnt be my choice. I like having company and someone to share things with. I also like "my time" which is time away and alone occasionally. Its about finding a balance that works for you.

I think as expats, those who live alone in the same town should really help other , just in case 'something happens'.

 

 

 

 

 

[VocalNeal]

17 minutes ago, EricTh said:

I think as expats, those who live alone in the same town should really help other , just in case 'something happens'.

In my experience they usually do if said individuals travel in the same circles. But then they wouldn't be living independently, at least socially. 

[scubascuba3]

51 minutes ago, rott said:

He starts off open and gregarious, then turns anti-social. 

in the other thread he was cold and disparaging towards thai girls so it all kinda makes sense

[thaibeachlovers]

11 hours ago, EricTh said:

I think as expats, those who live alone in the same town should really help other , just in case 'something happens'.

 

 

 

 

 

LOL. Whenever I passed another expat, some would go out of their way to avoid having any contact whatsoever with me- not so much as a nod of the head.

Why would I or anyone try to help such antisocial people?

[RJRS1301]

11 hours ago, VocalNeal said:

In my experience they usually do if said individuals travel in the same circles. But then they wouldn't be living independently, at least socially. 

One can and does live independently, without being socially isolated 

[VocalNeal]

I'm dependent on

my bank not losing my money

Internet not being available for bank transfers

Etc..