Do you fall in love with women?

[BritManToo]

2 minutes ago, thaibeachlovers said:

I'm sorry that you never had sex with someone you loved deeply then. I only had it with one person in my life, and it only lasted a year, but while it lasted it was wonderful.

No, I've had sex with women I loved, it just wasn't very good compared to sex with the professionals.

[Lucky Bones]

7 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Maybe he's a violent thug/drug dealer/murderer ................. women seem to like them.

Oh Ho. Smokin' hootchie witchie.

"White Punks on Dope."

 

[Will B Good]

I'm far from convinced men are capable of 'true' love.

 

Men are, by and large, far too immature and selfish......they suffer from varying degrees of lust, which they confuse for love.

[Lucky Bones]

On 10/17/2022 at 3:03 PM, BritManToo said:

Have you tried turning the lights off before undressing?

35 years ago that was not a option.

Now....???

[Kwasaki]

38 minutes ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Might be that she doesn't like men that think money is everything, and that they are special, or perhaps size really does matter and the bus driver is a really big guy.

Everyone to their own thing. 

 

[Lucky Bones]

On 10/17/2022 at 4:40 PM, Mac Mickmanus said:

Is that for the whole night and another go in the morning ?

Is that long time with a old lady?

[spidermike007]

2 hours ago, BritManToo said:

You've missed the thread where SM admits to 'investing' his(?) money in 'her land' and 4,000 mango trees.

 

Yes, after dating for two years, and living together for another 7 years, I felt I had invested enough time into getting to know her and her family. We were married after being together for 9 years. Enough time? And I would do it all over again. She is a wonderful woman, and is more than my equal, on so many levels. She deserves whatever she gets, or is given. It is all about worthiness. And that takes alot of time to determine. 

[spidermike007]

3 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

In the post I replied to you didn't come across as an equal person. IMO you came across as an "I'm the boss" sort of person where women are concerned.

You are of course within your rights to be like that with a female, if you have one that accepts it. After my experience of female partners I'm not a fan of long term relationships anyway, and wish I'd never been so stupid as to think a relationship was a good idea.

However, when I was with them I did treat them as equals.

This is easily misunderstood by alot of Western men. A ship needs a captain. Most relationships needs an alpha. Whether it is the man or the woman. In the West, most are captained by the woman, and the man takes a submissive role. Here, women prefer men to act like men, and take charge. If you don't, she will, but most women here would prefer not to.

 

I do not boss her around. But, she loves when I am strong, and decisive. It is very healthy role playing, and she is able to be a real woman, and I am able to act like a man. We both love it. Alot of very healthy relationships are played out like this. Some men just cannot wrap their minds around a woman manifesting the incredibly gorgeous dignity within femininity, and enabling their man to behave like a strong and healthy man. 

[spidermike007]

3 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

You must have the "it" factor to be able to have a sexual relationship with so many women. Despite working with thousands of females over my decades as a nurse, I never found anything like that number that would have been interested in having a long term relationship with me. So few in fact that I can still remember each one. Certainly I never was able to get to a live in stage with more than a few.

Perhaps because I was a nurse and didn't earn the big bucks to be attractive enough.

Well, we all seem to have a very different definition of what girlfriend is, or is not. I hear some men or women talk about being in love with someone after knowing them two weeks. All that is, is anxiety, impatience, and the intense desire to be in love. Some are more in love with the idea of being in love, than with the person they are with. I think for most of us who are emotionally healthy, the idea of taking one's time to really get to know someone, is alot more informative and desirable, than just losing oneself in the moment. 

 

I have seen countless men lose their fortunes, or at least their financial stability here, by moving too fast, assuming she is someone she definitely is not, and projecting too much onto someone they have not bothered to really get to know, and allowing the woman to push the agenda. Always push back against a timeline. Always. It is far better to lose the woman, than to unnecessarily lose your money and feel like a fool. 

[Sparktrader]

6 minutes ago, spidermike007 said:

Well, we all seem to have a very different definition of what girlfriend is, or is not. I hear some men or women talk about being in love with someone after knowing them two weeks. All that is, is anxiety, impatience, and the intense desire to be in love. Some are more in love with the idea of being in love, than with the person they are with. I think for most of us who are emotionally healthy, the idea of taking one's time to really get to know someone, is alot more informative and desirable, than just losing oneself in the moment. 

 

I have seen countless men lose their fortunes, or at least their financial stability here, by moving too fast, assuming she is someone she definitely is not, and projecting too much onto someone they have not bothered to really get to know, and allowing the woman to push the agenda. Always push back against a timeline. Always. 

Live and let be. Always another pretty 35yo around if one has a bad heart.

[spidermike007]

19 minutes ago, Sparktrader said:

Live and let be. Always another pretty 35yo around if one has a bad heart.

That is exactly my point. There is alot to work with here, so why act like a desperado, and move too quickly, allow yourself to succumb to her pressure, her timetable, and her demands, before really getting to know her, and before determining her degree of worthiness of your devotion? 

 

The problem is, to do this effectively a man needs to have alot of self esteem, patience, and willingness to walk away, if the pressure is more than one wants to deal with. Women here almost always push the timeline and it is up to us to push back. No, I do not think so. 

[Sparktrader]

2 minutes ago, spidermike007 said:

That is exactly my point. There is alot to work with here, so why act like a desperado, and move too quickly, allow yourself to succumb to her pressure, her timetable, and her demands, before really getting to know her, and before determining her degree of worthiness of your devotion? 

 

The problem is, to do this effectively a man needs to have alot of self esteem, patience, and willingness to walk away, if the pressure is more than one wants to deal with. Women here almost always push the timeline and it is up to us to push back. No, I do not think so. 

Reading books helps, drinking doesnt.

[spidermike007]

Just now, Sparktrader said:

Reading books helps, drinking doesnt.

Vert true. Fortunately before moving here I read 5 or 6 of the "things to watch out for with Thai women" books. They were full of tales of woe, good tips, and invaluable insights. I recommend that to any single guy planning on moving here. Most come very unprepared, and very vulnerable emotionally, and many women here are well coached, and know exactly what to say. Especially if it is a bar or massage gal. 

 

My gal used to sent me these silly romantic poems when I was back in the US. She copied them from a book. I could see that right away, and told her to stop being ridiculous. She stopped the nonsense. 

[Sparktrader]

Dad sick

Car crash

Need money for kid uni fees

[Photoguy21]

I guess I do as my wife is a woman. Seems a rather bizarre question to ask though. I wont ask your preference as I may be shocked.

[Sparktrader]

4 minutes ago, Photoguy21 said:

I guess I do as my wife is a woman. Seems a rather bizarre question to ask though. I wont ask your preference as I may be shocked.

Lots of guys just use women,no love. 

 

How is it bizarre? Seems from the responses 80% dont care about women.

 

My pref is good looking women under 36yo.

 

Whats your pref?

[Photoguy21]

Just now, Sparktrader said:

Lots of guys just use women,no love. 

 

How is it bizarre? Seems from the responses 80% dont care about women.

 

My pref is good looking women under 36yo.

 

Whats your pref?

Because it is a definite question no ambiguity.

[Sparktrader]

1 minute ago, Photoguy21 said:

Because it is a definite question no ambiguity.

Do you think guys in Phuket or Samui or Pattaya are all there for love? 555

[seedy]

Love - the other 4 letter word.

Respect - Compassion - Brotherhood - Friendship - those I get.

But life is not baseball - no 3 strike rule. One strike allowed.

Love is a made up Fairy Tale

[thaibeachlovers]

18 hours ago, Will B Good said:

I'm far from convinced men are capable of 'true' love.

 

Men are, by and large, far too immature and selfish......they suffer from varying degrees of lust, which they confuse for love.

Indeed. Something that western ( and Thai ) women have used to their advantage. Hook the guy, bleed him dry and then take even more when they divorce the sucker.

[thaibeachlovers]

15 hours ago, Sparktrader said:

Lots of guys just use women,no love. 

 

How is it bizarre? Seems from the responses 80% dont care about women.

 

My pref is good looking women under 36yo.

 

Whats your pref?

I never looked to use women, but ended up getting used myself.

If I could wake up a 20 year old man ( knowing what I know now ) I'd be out there using them with the rest.

[thaibeachlovers]

13 hours ago, seedy said:

Love - the other 4 letter word.

Respect - Compassion - Brotherhood - Friendship - those I get.

But life is not baseball - no 3 strike rule. One strike allowed.

Love is a made up Fairy Tale

A very profitable fairy tale- diamonds, weddings etc.

[thaibeachlovers]

16 hours ago, spidermike007 said:

This is easily misunderstood by alot of Western men. A ship needs a captain. Most relationships needs an alpha. Whether it is the man or the woman. In the West, most are captained by the woman, and the man takes a submissive role. Here, women prefer men to act like men, and take charge. If you don't, she will, but most women here would prefer not to.

 

I do not boss her around. But, she loves when I am strong, and decisive. It is very healthy role playing, and she is able to be a real woman, and I am able to act like a man. We both love it. Alot of very healthy relationships are played out like this. Some men just cannot wrap their minds around a woman manifesting the incredibly gorgeous dignity within femininity, and enabling their man to behave like a strong and healthy man. 

A relationship is not a ship, and women loving a "strong" man is just female BS IMO.

It's all about making the man happy so they get what they want.

 

I'm happy that you seem to have found true love, but it's a rarity, not the norm, IMO.

 

I only knew one couple that had true love, and he died in his forties before it could go bad.

The couples I know that survive do so because they choose to live together for companionship ( or because they wouldn't do better apart ), not love.

[thaibeachlovers]

15 hours ago, Sparktrader said:

Do you think guys in Phuket or Samui or Pattaya are all there for love? 555

We are all looking for looove. It's a genetic impulse, but men are programmed to look for loooove with many women, and women are programmed  to look for a nest builder while they bring up the offspring.

[talahtnut]

I pushed my wifes head down the pan and flushed it

then I threw a dozen eggs at her, after that she chased

me up the soi wielding a sword.

Married bliss, on the lively side.

[Sparktrader]

2 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

I never looked to use women, but ended up getting used myself.

If I could wake up a 20 year old man ( knowing what I know now ) I'd be out there using them with the rest.

Id just buy amazon and bitcoin

[spidermike007]

7 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

A relationship is not a ship, and women loving a "strong" man is just female BS IMO.

It's all about making the man happy so they get what they want.

 

I'm happy that you seem to have found true love, but it's a rarity, not the norm, IMO.

 

I only knew one couple that had true love, and he died in his forties before it could go bad.

The couples I know that survive do so because they choose to live together for companionship ( or because they wouldn't do better apart ), not love.

Perhaps it is the definition of love that we seem to be a gulf apart on. Someone having your back all the time. Alot of affection, kindness, humor, joking, playing and warm, loving mannerisms. Trust, emotional consistency and devotion too. Perhaps many are not fortunate enoigh to find all that, but I would most certainly define it as true love. Granted, it is the only relationship, where I have experienced this. And most couples that I see, that have been together for many years, do seem to either co-exist, or are simply companions. Some do not even seem to like each other.

[BritManToo]

7 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

I'm happy that you seem to have found true love, but it's a rarity, not the norm, IMO.

More likely delusion than love.

So many guys imagining their one is different.

If she's got great boobs and a slim body, that's good enough for me.

IMHO no need for any silly pretense in the relationship.

[Photoguy21]

23 hours ago, Sparktrader said:

Do you think guys in Phuket or Samui or Pattaya are all there for love? 555

Most are just losers in the real world so they enjoy living in their made up fantasy world. 555

[Hummin]

So much negativity when it comes to relationships and women here, and men who live in the past. 
 

Nuture negative feelings instead of positive. No wonder it doesnt work. 
 

Love needs to be nutured from both parts. Give and take and not so complicated at once you have an partner who understand the same as you and get each others back. 
 

The first thing I told my gf, now wife, it is you and me against the world, not against each other. At once we manage and understand that, we will make it if we want. And so far it have stuck with us, and every time we start nagging and being childish we reminding each other what we agreed up on.
 

However it works for us. Just sad to see so many lost souls pouring out negativity day after day.