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The secret art of vetting a Thai woman's character

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  • Author
2 minutes ago, rumak said:

 

Thailand is FULL of disgruntled guys that thought they had found a gold nugget .

Year after year the shine starts to wear off ,  and much of the worth has been transferred to the "nuggets"  side of the ledger.

 

I think relationships everywhere are a real roll of the dice.   vetting does sort out some,

but only time determines what people are really like .... not to mention whether lasting love even exists .   well, for some maybe 

 

remember, if you are a man with a healthy libido ......... being "faithful"  means repressing a lot .    Many things in life are trade offs

 

True words of golden wisdom.

 

The nuggets we DO find will lose their value over time. No doubt about it. So you best hope that nugget has other qualities apart from looks, hence the vetting. But you are right, only over many years will the true character come out. In adversity.

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  • spidermike007
    spidermike007

    I have so many friends, who come here, and from the very start, make the same mistakes they made back in the West. Except here, they do not need to make those mistakes. The environment does not dictat

  • OP's got a pretty low opinion of women, if those are the only two types one expects to meet.  Your own projection of that opinion, reflects more about yourself, which a good woman would easily pick up

  • The OP has never met a "real" or "normal" Thai woman. Its that simple. They dont go on dating sites looking for guys like him. He simply does not have a clue and never has since he has started his dat

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  • Author

In the US 56% of women under 30 have been diagnosed with some kind of mental disorder. 

 

https://www.afterbabel.com/p/mental-health-liberal-girls

 

That is the West, which is rich. I suspect in Thailand, where families routinely face far greater financial challenges this percentage is considerably higher. Maybe as high as 66% or 75%.

 

If you are in a relationship with a Thai girl under 30, your chances that she is mentally ill may not be just 1 out 2, it maybe as high as 2 out of 3.

 

Have you ever found that everything seems to be going fine, but then out of the blue they create problems and do not act right? It is possible it is just mental illness and they do not have the skills for a relationship. 

14 minutes ago, Cameroni said:

In the US 56% of women under 30 have been diagnosed with some kind of mental disorder. 

 

https://www.afterbabel.com/p/mental-health-liberal-girls

 

That is the West, which is rich. I suspect in Thailand, where families routinely face far greater financial challenges this percentage is considerably higher. Maybe as high as 66% or 75%.

 

If you are in a relationship with a Thai girl under 30, your chances that she is mentall ill may not be just 1 out 2, it maybe as high as 2 out of 3.

 

Have you ever found that everything seems to be going fine, but then out of the blue they create problems and do not act right? It is possible it is just mental illness and they do not have the skills for a relationship. 

Bang on the money there Sir.

 

I read a report recently that 60% of American men had an IQ of below 70. The % for the ladies, on the same tests, was just 10. But!! Someone pointed out, that an IQ of less than 70 meant you couldn't be considered for the military.

 

So reading between the lines; could we really say that US women are smarter than US men?

 

As for the Thai girls. I've met one or two that were clever. But could they herd buffaloes? Climb a tree? Or set a trap to catch cat-fish?

 

Bring back the old days I say. When women had long hair, and men had clubs.

  • Author
4 minutes ago, Stiddle Mump said:

As for the Thai girls. I've met one or two that were clever.

 

Thai girls are very clever. Just because a person is not educated or has had to face poverty in life, it does not mean they are not clever.

 

In fact, if she is attractive, the odds are she will have had FAR more experience dating than the average male, so she will be playing her cards far better than most men.

 

Even people with a mental disorder can be inordinately intelligent.

24 minutes ago, Cameroni said:

Thai girls are very clever. Just because a person is not educated or has had to face poverty in life, it does not mean they are not clever.

 

In fact, if she is attractive, the odds are she will have had FAR more experience dating than the average male, so she will be playing her cards far better than most men.

False. Totally false. Again these are the women on dating apps that you are talking about. Again you have never really met a real Thai woman from a good family. Most live at home with their families until marriage. 

On 3/31/2025 at 11:45 PM, spidermike007 said:

I have so many friends, who come here, and from the very start, make the same mistakes they made back in the West. Except here, they do not need to make those mistakes. The environment does not dictate that they behave like lambs. Many do not know, or realize that, or they succumb to "force of habit". Every ship needs a captain. If the man is not willing to be the captain of the ship, the woman will take over, here in Thailand. Most women here seem to want a strong man. But, if they end up with a wimp, they will take over. They have to. Someone needs to be the captain!

 

Many Thai women are very clever at making it appear that they really care for "their guy". And on many occasions, that is true, especially in long term relationships. But, for short time gals, it is just a game, and they play it well. Many Western men who come here are emotionally vulnerable, or an emotional wreck, having endured years of near torture by uber-feminists. 

 

My advice would be to take your time, okay you've already invested an extraordinary amount of time into chatting with somebody online, which is something I would never do, but all that is said and done. So once you get here take your time. Don't move fast, don't move in with her, don't live with her, date her for 6 months to a year and see how you like her.

 

When you meet a girl in person that you have met online, there is a possibility that you won't even like what you see, and that there will be zero chemistry. So, keep your expectations low, and come here and really really take your time getting to know her. What this means is consistent pushback from you, because she's going to want to step up the timetable, she's going to want it to move fast, she's going to want everything to happen right away, and you're going to have to be man enough to say sorry but I need a lot of time to determine whether or not you're the right woman for me, and I need a lot of time to get to know you.

 

Always remember if it's good it's only going to get better, and if there are problems they're going to manifest themselves over time. So the worst thing you can do is rush headlong into this thing. Man up and do your gender justice. Make us proud. 

 

The best chance any man has is to really be patient and really take his time. The woman is usually going to push to move things forward because she has an agenda, and the man always has to push back. If you're not willing to be patient, if you're not willing to abide by my timeline then I'm just going to walk. Time is your ally, if it's good it's only going to get better if there are problems they're going to manifest themselves over time. Always be willing to walk, plenty more fish in the sea, especially here. 

 

 

Great post Mike. You should do more like this. 

  • Author
19 minutes ago, blaze master said:

 

Great post Mike. You should do more like this. 

 

It really was a good post.

 

Stephen here, did not vet. His story shows what can happen in Asia. He paid the ultimate price. A very sad story.

 

 

  • Author
2 minutes ago, UserC923 said:

How do you identify who is Thai?

 

Generally if they order Som Tum Lao instead of Som Tom Thai, you can be sure it's a Thai.

4 นาทีที่แล้ว Cameroni กล่าวว่า:

 

นักร้องที่เขาสั่งส้มตำลาวแทนส้มตำไทยยังคงเป็นสมุนไพร

Nonsense, this is the dumbest thing this year.

  • Author
11 minutes ago, UserC923 said:

How do you identify who is Thai?

 

Also, if its' a prostitute, probably Thai.

1 hour ago, Cameroni said:

 

แล้วถ้าเป็นโสเภณีก็คงเป็นคนไทย

I don't know either. But what can probably confirm that it's not just Thais is the data from the IOM in 2019.

12 hours ago, UserC923 said:

How do you identify who is Thai?

If they eat unbelievably stinky food that has been buried for a thousand years, fermented to the point beyond recognition, or a multitude of insects prepared in a vast manner of fashions, they are Thai! 

11 hours ago, Cameroni said:

 

Also, if its' a prostitute, probably Thai.

Well I know an awful lot of American women that I could classify as prostitutes, but they would never admit it, and they would never name a price. It's just that you have to reach that threshold of gifts and prizes before you can get the ultimate prize.

 

What would you call that? The big difference is that here they're bold enough and honest enough to state what they need up front. Back there they just play this ridiculous game and many very unfortunate souls play along with it. It's called being a SIMP. 

  • Author
5 minutes ago, spidermike007 said:

Well I know an awful lot of American women that I could classify as prostitutes, but they would never admit it, and they would never name a price. It's just that you have to reach that threshold of gifts and prizes before you can get the ultimate prize.

 

What would you call that? The big difference is that here they're bold enough and honest enough to state what they need up front. Back there they just play this ridiculous game and many very unfortunate souls play along with it. It's called being a SIMP. 

 

That's absolutely true. You pay for every woman. The only question is how much and how openly. No matter where you are. 

 

They're certainly bold and open enough here to state it up front. On Thaifriendly, when you see in the actual profile "Seeking Sugar Daddy", "Hope to meet someone for support" "Like gentleman not stingy" "I like money" (all real profile headings I have personally seen), you don't even bat an eyelid anymore. Some are more shy, they don't put it in the  profile heading, but how many times have you engaged and they wrote back "I'm freelance"? I would say a good 60% of TF profiles are prostitutes.

 

 

I found a good thai wife, but even then marriage still sucks. I do not think it would be better with a western woman, or another thai woman. No interest in hookers, and if i were to do it over i wouldnt get too serious with anyone, or get their hopes up because relationships seem to be very transactional

  • Author
1 minute ago, hotsun said:

I found a good thai wife, but even then marriage still sucks. I do not think it would be better with a western woman, or another thai woman. No interest in hookers, and if i were to do it over i wouldnt get too serious with anyone, or get their hopes up because relationships seem to be very transactional

 

Yes, absolutely relationships ARE transactional. The reason is that inequality is the very basis of relationships. Both parties only enter into one if they want something from the other which they do not have. Whilst with women it is almost always money that they want, it can also be status, security, kind manners, good looks, it can be many things. But basically they want something they do not have.

 

If neither party want anything, if they are both equal in every way, then there would be no need to enter into a relationship, it would not come to pass. So at their very core relationships are transactional.

 

May I ask how old the Thai wife was when you first met her?

1 minute ago, Cameroni said:

 

Yes, absolutely relationships ARE transactional. The reason is that inequality is the very basis of relationships. Both parties only enter into one if they want something from the other which they do not have. Whilst with women it is almost always money that they want, it can also be status, security, kind manners, good looks, it can be many things. But basically they want something they do not have.

 

If neither party want anything, if they are both equal in every way, then there would be no need to enter into a relationship, it would not come to pass. So at their very core relationships are transactional.

 

May I ask how old the Thai wife was when you first met her?

21.

 

it was great at the beginning. She bought me an expensive backpack for my birthday, something an american girl would have never done. We had kids and things changed. I dont like any women anymore

  • Author
24 minutes ago, hotsun said:

She bought me an expensive backpack for my birthday,

 

So she was very giving by nature? That's very lucky, it's extremely rare in a woman, who are mostly about Me, Me, Me, Me.

 

And she has been completely loyal throughout? No strange behaviour? How long has it been in total?

26 minutes ago, hotsun said:

We had kids and things changed.

 

This is something they don't tell fathers. That the woman's character will change dramatically. My ex wife as well, after she had children her character was like transformed, a 180 degree turn, and not for the better. I didn't like her after the kids anymore either. Even less now.

 

Kids really are life-changing. How did it manifest in your case?

5 minutes ago, Cameroni said:

 

So she was very giving by nature? That's very lucky, it's extremely rare in a woman, who are mostly about Me, Me, Me, Me.

 

And she has been completely loyal throughout? No strange behaviour? How long has it been in total?

 

This is something they don't tell fathers. That the woman's character will change dramatically. My ex wife as well, after she had children her character was like transformed, a 180 degree turn, and not for the better. I didn't like her after the kids anymore either. Even less now.

 

Kids really are life-changing. How did it manifest in your case?

Well i love my kids, i still think about my times in Asia alot and how things would be different had i just stayed on the same path, but sleeping around was getting boring too. I think its just as bad for guys to have alot of partners, it makes settling down alot harder

 

 

i met my wife online. The truth is that i got lucky. It could be alot worse. But marriage isnt natural. Weve been together 9 years. 

19 hours ago, Cameroni said:

Even people with a mental disorder can be inordinately intelligent.

Of course you are right.

 

Madeleine Albright springs to mind.

  • Author
1 minute ago, hotsun said:

Well i love my kids, i still think about my times in Asia alot and how things would be different had i just stayed on the same path, but sleeping around was getting boring too. I think its just as bad for guys to have alot of partners, it makes settling down alot harder

 

Oh so you are no longer married? How long were you together?

 

I do agree, it's not good for a man to fall in love in a serial way, it degrades the whole experience.  If you fall in love with a large number of women it just becomes ridiculous.  So, our path is clear, to put our logic before our emotions. Not easy at all times.

1 minute ago, Cameroni said:

 

Oh so you are no longer married? How long were you together?

 

I do agree, it's not good for a man to fall in love in a serial way, it degrades the whole experience.  If you fall in love with a large number of women it just becomes ridiculous.  So, our path is clear, to put our logic before our emotions. Not easy at all times.

Still married, 9 years. If she wants to seperate id be fine with it. Now i know that id prefer not to live with anyone

  • Author
3 minutes ago, hotsun said:

Still married, 9 years. If she wants to seperate id be fine with it. Now i know that id prefer not to live with anyone

 

This is mostly because her character changed after the kids arrived?

1 minute ago, Cameroni said:

 

This is mostly because her character changed after the kids arrived?

Maybe the issue is myself. Id try harder to keep her if she were the only one i met but with my experiences i am jaded with humans as a whole. Mostly has nothing to do with her

Be a wolf, don’t be a meek little lamb—which doesn’t mean hitting women, that is also being weak—always wear the trousers, and keep your head screwed on regards the lovey dovey stuff. Generalising here, but Thai women do seem to be a bit colder emotionally, yet easily feign it. Don’t dive in and just walk when summat ain’t quite right. We have intuition but rarely heed it. 

  • Author
8 minutes ago, hotsun said:

Maybe the issue is myself. Id try harder to keep her if she were the only one i met but with my experiences i am jaded with humans as a whole. Mostly has nothing to do with her

 

So she is loyal, generous and a good woman, but you just don't feel attracted to her anymore?

 

 

  • Author
3 minutes ago, daveAustin said:

Be a wolf, don’t be a meek little lamb—which doesn’t mean hitting women, that is also being weak—always wear the trousers, and keep your head screwed on regards the lovey dovey stuff. Generalising here, but Thai women do seem to be a bit colder emotionally, yet easily feign it. Don’t dive in and just walk when summat ain’t quite right. We have intuition but rarely heed it. 

 

Excellent advice.

 

Women generally are cold. Ruthless even. They would think nothing of your emotions. There is nothing colder, or more ruthless than a woman. Which makes sense because there is also nothing warmer and hotter than a woman, if they can do one, they can do the other. 

Just now, Cameroni said:

 

So she is loyal, generous and a good woman, but you just don't feel attracted to her anymore?

 

 

She is also quite attractive still and only 30. I am only staying with her for the kids, i think the feeling is mutual.

  • Author
1 minute ago, hotsun said:

She is also quite attractive still and only 30. I am only staying with her for the kids, i think the feeling is mutual.

 

Okay, she's attractive, but you're clearly not attracted to her anymore. Why is that?

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