April 7, 2025Apr 7 56 minutes ago, Cameroni said: A lot. No. I source them from all over Thailand and ask them to come fly to me in Chiang Mai. I send them a ticket and they come to me. Sometimes I fly to Bangkok to meet them. Dating Apps? I guess that could work... And what do you want in a girl? And what do you feel you have to offer? 11 minutes ago, Phil1964 said: all Thai women are basically incapable of being faithful and are manipulative, destructive liars ... Mine certainly was as well as being violent and sexually abusive Wow, you can run for office on that in the USA
April 7, 2025Apr 7 8 hours ago, save the frogs said: age is not a minor issue. OP mentioned he is interested in 20 year olds. I remember in college I was into this girl. And she ended up marrying this beefy tough guy. He turned out to be an ahole. They got divorced a few years later. She met me many years later and only then was interested in me ... after learning the hard way marrying an ahole. Now she appreciates someone like me. 20 year olds lack maturity, are more likely to sleep around, many more guys are chasing them, maybe they need to go through a few bad relationships or a bad marriage before they grow up. Yes, going through "a few bad relationships or a bad marriage" before they came to Thailand has worked so well for a few forum members, including some contributors to this thread, so indeed, why not?
April 7, 2025Apr 7 Author 52 minutes ago, 1FinickyOne said: Dating Apps? I guess that could work... And what do you want in a girl? And what do you feel you have to offer? it does work well. Almost unbelievably well. I can't believe how girls just take a flight to stay at the house of a total stranger. It's literally incomprehensible to me. But they do it. I want a sweet innocent girl, 18 to 26, body count no higher than 9, honest, loyal, full of joy, kind, hard working and funny. In return I can offer an attractive appearance, a four bed house with fastest internet, laptop, an active sex life, care and understanding, all bills paid, loyalty, a lot of things.
April 7, 2025Apr 7 13 hours ago, Cameroni said: A lot. No. I source them from all over Thailand and ask them to come fly to me in Chiang Mai. I send them a ticket and they come to me. Sometimes I fly to Bangkok to meet them. So how many have you met? And they are all failing your tests? How long do they stay with you? It takes quite a while being around them to get to know them. Isn't it better to stay local?
April 7, 2025Apr 7 Author 3 minutes ago, save the frogs said: So how many have you met? And they are all failing your tests? How long do they stay with you? It takes quite a while being around them to get to know them. Isn't it better to stay local? Some stay 5 days, some 2 weeks. If I think they have potential I ask them to come again of course, to get to know them better. This is how I got the girl who stayed with me for one year, but turned out to be, well, a liar. Most do fail. You'd be surprised how quickly a fun looking good candidate turns into a crumbling "I can't pay my rent, I work selling mobile phone covers, can you help with my rent". Immediate fail. One girl was a virgin but did not want to have sex. One went through my papers. One had skin issues, a real crown of scab around her buttocks. Another just wanted to move in to clean and earn money. Another did not like the date location I chose. Another rocked up with 2 other girlfriends. I honestly lost count how many I met, but not a huge number, not Keith Richards territory. But no matter how good they look on paper, you'd be shocked how quickly they out themselves as unsuitable. In a way you're right, this is not an optimal set up, to get them in the house right away. That is why I now also source girls on Bumble locally. So far no luck. One good one got away, but that was my fault.
April 7, 2025Apr 7 11 hours ago, Cameroni said: In a way you're right, this is not an optimal set up, to get them in the house right away. I remember reading a Buddhist text once. He recommended never sleeping with a girl right away, to wait at least one lunar month. That stuck with me and I take that advice. But could work, I guess.
April 7, 2025Apr 7 Author 16 minutes ago, save the frogs said: I remember reading a Buddhist text once. He recommended never sleeping with a girl right away, to wait at least one lunar month. That stuck with me and I take that advice. But could work, I guess. I've heard that said before, that if you sleep with them on the first date it will be bad for the relationship. It does not make sense to me, if you create fun and pleasant experiences it can only help the relationship surely. But it is notable how often a girl will drag out having sex, 3 or 4 days, even when she stays in the house and wants you to do something for her. It's a big thing for a girl to have sex with a guy.
April 7, 2025Apr 7 54 minutes ago, Cameroni said: One good one got away, but that was my fault. Did you call her sister for a background check? Or do you have a private detective for that? 1 hour ago, Cameroni said: In return I can offer an attractive appearance, a four bed house with fastest internet, laptop, an active sex life, care and understanding, all bills paid, loyalty, a lot of things. how many years have you been in Thailand and how much do you know about the culture and what they value? Do you know what is important to them? Do you care? I also never hear you mention love? If the actuality of what you are doing is short time relationships, why would you even care if they lie? I was told of an enormous work compiled, maybe 2 volumes, of what constituted a lie, or an acceptable lie, in different cultures. For Thailand, if a lady lies to benefit her family, that is acceptable. there are acceptable daily lies in our culture too...
April 7, 2025Apr 7 Author 21 minutes ago, 1FinickyOne said: Did you call her sister for a background check? Or do you have a private detective for that? No, it never got that far. I dropped the ball on the first date. I arrived late. Then I noticed I had not transferred money to my Thai bank account. Very embarrassing when the bill came. It was very regrettable because she was a very attractive woman, personality wise too. 22 minutes ago, 1FinickyOne said: how many years have you been in Thailand and how much do you know about the culture and what they value? Do you know what is important to them? Do you care? I also never hear you mention love? If the actuality of what you are doing is short time relationships, why would you even care if they lie? I don't want a short term relationship, I want a long term one. But unfortunately most of the girls are not qualified for that. There's a lot of broken people out there. What they value varies from girl to girl I think you'll find. You can't really draw with a broad brush. These girls are quite different. Of course I care what they like. I never mention love. Even with the girl I was with for one year, I was careful not to say the three words, even when my feelings were sky high. I want them to say it first.
April 7, 2025Apr 7 Popular Post 1 hour ago, Cameroni said: I want them to say it first. And that never happens, does it? Neither my wife and I have ever said the words either. 24 years. I know what she would have said if I ever asked about it. Words like that come cheap and are meaningless. If you have love, you show it, not talk about it. Deeds take effort. And through the years, there are opportunities to "show" it through actions and responses in times of family crisis and medical emergencies. Talking about my part and 'sacrifices' would have been considered bragging or seeking a compliment. The entire family knows that I can be relied on in times of need, be it financially or otherwise. And that is part of why I said most people would not want a relationship such as I have. I have no problem contributing to the family financially. My wife and I raised a niece from the time that she was 1 year old and had been in a medical emergency. She was in a coma for 4 days and I sat with her in the hospital along with other family members. We cried together. there were at least 2 family members sitting with her 24/7 watching her and watching the respirator. When she came to, my wife and I raised her as a daughter and have put in the time and money for good schools, to raise her well. I am sure this is widely respected through the large family and entire village and actually, anyone we meet. And if there is a reward for this, it is that she is a great kid. But, the point I was making is that you seem to have all these requirements, for her, not so much for yourself and what you might have to offer and love is never mentioned. Of course, love can be fleeting and hard to define also. There is also a transactional element to seeking a mate here. Being a good provider is prized more so than having all your hair or being 'handsome man' - easy going, good disposition, not getting easily angered or drinking which is often accompanied by hitting. This is what they want in a mate. And I think that is common throughout the world - people want spouses who will take care of them if the need would arise
April 8, 2025Apr 8 Author 9 hours ago, 1FinickyOne said: And that never happens, does it? Neither my wife and I have ever said the words either. 24 years. I know what she would have said if I ever asked about it. Words like that come cheap and are meaningless. If you have love, you show it, not talk about it. Deeds take effort. And through the years, there are opportunities to "show" it through actions and responses in times of family crisis and medical emergencies. Talking about my part and 'sacrifices' would have been considered bragging or seeking a compliment. The entire family knows that I can be relied on in times of need, be it financially or otherwise. And that is part of why I said most people would not want a relationship such as I have. I have no problem contributing to the family financially. My wife and I raised a niece from the time that she was 1 year old and had been in a medical emergency. She was in a coma for 4 days and I sat with her in the hospital along with other family members. We cried together. there were at least 2 family members sitting with her 24/7 watching her and watching the respirator. When she came to, my wife and I raised her as a daughter and have put in the time and money for good schools, to raise her well. I am sure this is widely respected through the large family and entire village and actually, anyone we meet. And if there is a reward for this, it is that she is a great kid. But, the point I was making is that you seem to have all these requirements, for her, not so much for yourself and what you might have to offer and love is never mentioned. Of course, love can be fleeting and hard to define also. There is also a transactional element to seeking a mate here. Being a good provider is prized more so than having all your hair or being 'handsome man' - easy going, good disposition, not getting easily angered or drinking which is often accompanied by hitting. This is what they want in a mate. And I think that is common throughout the world - people want spouses who will take care of them if the need would arise She said I love you, the one who stayed for 1 year. Even while she was in Phuket having sex with another guy in a 5 star restort. So what good was it? Indeed it has to be congruent with actions. And one of the key actions is loyalty. You can do all those things that you have done, and she can still cheat on you. I paid 2ooo dollars for the operation of a sister, for the burial of a father, paid sister's school fees and so on, and she still cheated, this was the Filipina of 6 years. With the Thai girl I went to meet the family, attended intimate family gatherings, paid the mother's rent, none of this helped. I give generously in relationships when it is really required. But the difference is your female is 50 plus years, mine are 25, so this scourge of infidelity is more of a problem. Easy gonig good disposition, not easily angered, yes, true enough, this is part of what they want, I quite agree. But we must also not lose sight of what we really want. It is a two way street. It can't just you be financing her family and she then not being loyal, not doing housework, hiding things, lying. What we want is also important.
April 8, 2025Apr 8 11 hours ago, Cameroni said: I paid 2ooo dollars for the operation of a sister maybe adjust your strategy then. don't pay for that sort of stuff or wait a lot longer, like after 2 or 3 years only.
April 8, 2025Apr 8 Author 36 minutes ago, save the frogs said: maybe adjust your strategy then. don't pay for that sort of stuff or wait a lot longer, like after 2 or 3 years only. Of course I have. i learnt very bitter leasons with that Filipina. No way would i pay 2000 USD again for any family issue now. In fact I went so far in the other direction, I gave the Thai girl so little money that I think one of the reasons she cheated was that she thought she is not getting enough out of the relationship.
April 8, 2025Apr 8 11 hours ago, Cameroni said: I gave the Thai girl so little money that I think one of the reasons she cheated was that she thought she is not getting enough out of the relationship. it sounds crass, but you practically have to ask directly "how much do you want?" just like you would for a short-time ... well, otherwise you're forced to guess how much she expects out of you ...
April 8, 2025Apr 8 Author 21 minutes ago, save the frogs said: it sounds crass, but you practically have to ask directly "how much do you want?" just like you would for a short-time ... well, otherwise you're forced to guess how much she expects out of you ... That's not a good idea. Whilst the reality of every male-female relationship is transactional, both in the west and Asia, it always has to be unspoken. Just like in a job interview the employer would not ask "for how little will you do the work". Just like the employer always has to pretend he's acting generously and in the best interest of the employee, the employee has to pretend they love the work for the work itself, not because of the paycheck. The same relationships. You can't crassly bring out the actual, true transactional nature of the relationship. She has to believe she's there for love, and so do you.
April 8, 2025Apr 8 Author What do Steve McQueen, Elvis Presley, Cary Grant, Johnny Depp, and Tom Brady have in common? They were all left or cheated on by their girlfriend or wife. Take Steve McQueen, a bad boy Alpha Male. Every man wanted to be him, every woman wanted to sleep with him, every child wanted to grow up to be him. Did Ali McGraw stay loyal to him? No. She cheated on him. Steve McQueen did not vet properly. Had he investigarted he would have realised that Ali McGraw was with a much richer, powerful and influential man before him, indeed married. So she cheated on her husband when she slept with Steve McQueen. She already had a child with her previous husband. None of this raised red flags for Steve McQueen, he still wifed her up. And was cheated on by Ali McGraw. https://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/2023/07/ali-macgraw-memoir-robert-evans-steve-mcqueen?srsltid=AfmBOoocGnJQ7y0ZqBmoVgFzoC9tcn9SpZ1r72MkgO_v8J3e6MrIlItH
April 8, 2025Apr 8 15 hours ago, Cameroni said: But it is notable how often a girl will drag out having sex, 3 or 4 days ha ha... I met my wife through an introduction - a friend from the USA knew her family and had spent time with them in the village. He didn't tell me how pretty she was, but only that her family was terrific. I am very easy going and we had a 2 month chaperoned courtship. There was always a friend or more with her on our dates. There was no touching. Things were much cheaper then and I didn't mind meeting her friends, some from the village... That was her way of vetting. Very traditional. We went out to music and dinners and had a lot of fun. After 2 months, she moved in with me. Of course, this was in Bkk and if I was in the mood, I could always find companionship after the date ended. I was 52 at the time. The 'scene' was quite different then.
April 8, 2025Apr 8 Author 34 minutes ago, 1FinickyOne said: ha ha... I met my wife through an introduction - a friend from the USA knew her family and had spent time with them in the village. He didn't tell me how pretty she was, but only that her family was terrific. I am very easy going and we had a 2 month chaperoned courtship. There was always a friend or more with her on our dates. There was no touching. Things were much cheaper then and I didn't mind meeting her friends, some from the village... That was her way of vetting. Very traditional. We went out to music and dinners and had a lot of fun. After 2 months, she moved in with me. Of course, this was in Bkk and if I was in the mood, I could always find companionship after the date ended. I was 52 at the time. The 'scene' was quite different then. A lovely window to a time gone by. She was 40 then? Meeting through friends is by far the best way to meet a girl, you're very lucky. Yes, times have changed quite dramatically. Now all these girls are on dating apps hooking up with Ukrainians, Israelis, Australians, Danes, Americans, Russians, it's brutal now.
April 8, 2025Apr 8 13 minutes ago, Cameroni said: A lovely window to a time gone by. She was 40 then? Meeting through friends is by far the best way to meet a girl, you're very lucky. Yes, times have changed quite dramatically. Now all these girls are on dating apps hooking up with Ukrainians, Israelis, Australians, Danes, Americans, Russians, it's brutal now. I don't know much about online dating... I have met a couple of people who got off the plane with Gf's waiting to meet them [first visit] and seem to be well chosen. my wife was 30, I was 50 when we met [now 25 years ago] ... I sort of feel like I had an arranged marriage as my friend was much better at choosing a lady for me then I would have if choosing on my own. I know I am not out and around that much but it seems to me that I could meet nice females near anywhere...
April 8, 2025Apr 8 Author 11 minutes ago, 1FinickyOne said: I don't know much about online dating... I have met a couple of people who got off the plane with Gf's waiting to meet them [first visit] and seem to be well chosen. my wife was 30, I was 50 when we met [now 25 years ago] ... I sort of feel like I had an arranged marriage as my friend was much better at choosing a lady for me then I would have if choosing on my own. I know I am not out and around that much but it seems to me that I could meet nice females near anywhere... Perfect timing then 30 and 50. I think at 30 many women are ready to settle down. They've already ridden the carousel and were disapopinted and are then keenly aware of their biological clock ticking, they want to settle down and are ready to compromise. And I believe you at 30, she was most likely still good looking. You can choose well on dating sites. You learn a few important things. For instance, girls that like to show with pics in front of the Eiffel Tower, Kremlin or such are of no interest. They already had a deep relationship with a foreigner and were spoiled. I look ideally for a Thai girl that is from a poorer province, no photos abroad. If she omits the city where she is, she most likely has a boyfriend and does not want to be found, also dq. Words like "looking for support", also dq. Pics in nightclubs, dq. And on it goes, so you can already vet on the dating site, but of course it's only rudimentary. Indeed there are beautiful girls everywhere.
April 8, 2025Apr 8 36 minutes ago, Cameroni said: I think at 30 many women are ready to settle down My wife had a very different history than most. As the oldest child she had to go work as a maid in Bkk to send money home for her parents and younger sisters. They were the poorest family in the village. She is a worker. And she takes responsibility for the entire family. She worked for a strict Chinese family in Bkk and when she was 18 they brought her into the family business. They closed the business when she was 30 and she went to work in a bank. Not any easy life. I did understand when we met that taking care of her family was going to be a priority for her and I respected that. I lived for near 20 years with the family in the village. A great way to learn language and culture...
April 8, 2025Apr 8 Author 2 minutes ago, 1FinickyOne said: My wife had a very different history than most. As the oldest child she had to go work as a maid in Bkk to send money home for her parents and younger sisters. They were the poorest family in the village. She is a worker. And she takes responsibility for the entire family. She worked for a strict Chinese family in Bkk and when she was 18 they brought her into the family business. They closed the business when she was 30 and she went to work in a bank. Not any easy life. I did understand when we met that taking care of her family was going to be a priority for her and I respected that. I lived for near 20 years with the family in the village. A great way to learn language and culture... Yes it must be. The women here have extremely hard lives. After I threw out my Thai girl she went to live with her mother. She wanted to start a children's dress business because she is good as a seamstress. She can make 700 to 2000 Baht in one day selling those dresses. But the mother demands of her that she pays her 8000 Baht rent. So she can't invest the money she makes into fabric to make more dresses. She works 10 hour days making dresses, helps the mother in the food stall, helps the aunt packing her clothes orders. She is deeply embedded in this family eco system that is just using her. Then in 5 days her sister comes, who wants to divorce her husband, so she'll be going out with her. Sometimes the famiily can work badly against you.
April 8, 2025Apr 8 5 minutes ago, Cameroni said: Yes it must be. The women here have extremely hard lives. After I threw out my Thai girl she went to live with her mother. She wanted to start a children's dress business because she is good as a seamstress. She can make 700 to 2000 Baht in one day selling those dresses. But the mother demands of her that she pays her 8000 Baht rent. So she can't invest the money she makes into fabric to make more dresses. She works 10 hour days making dresses, helps the mother in the food stall, helps the aunt packing her clothes orders. She is deeply embedded in this family eco system that is just using her. Then in 5 days her sister comes, who wants to divorce her husband, so she'll be going out with her. Sometimes the famiily can work badly against you. Yes some families are messed up.
April 8, 2025Apr 8 Author 1 hour ago, Harrisfan said: Yes some families are messed up. The worst these girls let themselves be used in this way, helping their demanding, beer drinking promiscuous mother is their highest imperative. I told her repeatedly, they are using you. How will you grow your business if you cannot reinvest your profits but have to pay your mother's rent with the money you make? She just shrugs and says, you have to help family. Meanwhile her life gets ruined and she's just exploited as cheap labour.
April 8, 2025Apr 8 1 minute ago, Cameroni said: The worst these girls let themselves be used in this way, helping their demanding, beer drinking promiscuous mother is their highest imperative. I told her repeatedly, they are using you. How will you grow your business if you cannot reinvest your profits but have to pay your mother's rent with the money you make? She just shrugs and says, you have to help family. Meanwhile her life gets ruined and she's just exploited as cheap labour. Some humans just use people their whole life. Women are experts at it.
April 9, 2025Apr 9 this guy's been around and can spot a red flag a mile away. he says he's been on dates and when his farang friend goes to the bathroom, their woman hits on him.
April 9, 2025Apr 9 Author 22 minutes ago, save the frogs said: this guy's been around and can spot a red flag a mile away. he says he's been on dates and when his farang friend goes to the bathroom, their woman hits on him. Yes,. some solid points. I think he takes it too far though. Whilst I agree that tattoos are a red flag, if a girl has coloured nails that is not an issue. That's taking it a bit too far. Sure, for some super trad Isaan women coloured nails are unthinkable, but a lot of girls that grow up in the city and follow fashion will colour their nails. That means nothing generally. Only if in conjunction with bright coloured hair and tattoos maybe. One red flag he mentions, if the girl is really good looking and she dates a foreigner that's supposedly a red flag because 98% of thai girls prefer a thai man, strikes me as nonsense. Whilst the majority of Thai girls do prefer a Thai man, a lot of Thai girls strongly prefer a foreigner, and if they were born good looking that's just the way it is. That's not a red flag I think.
April 11, 2025Apr 11 Author Next level vettting: Uncover her attachment style, is she an avoidant, an axious or a securely attached? Suppose you are an anxious attached, if she is an avoidant this could cause a large number of issues for you. If she's anxious and you're an avoidant, again problems. Knowing her attachment style also will help you navigate the rel generally.
April 12, 2025Apr 12 On 4/5/2025 at 11:18 AM, Stiddle Mump said: IMO, the best way to truly understand a Thai woman - any woman for that matter - is to investigate her secret biorhythm. I tried that line on many a Thai woman ....... they rarely understood why they had to take their clothes off for me to "investigate" .
April 12, 2025Apr 12 1 hour ago, rumak said: I tried that line on many a Thai woman ....... they rarely understood why they had to take their clothes off for me to "investigate" . You don't have to get her naked to investigate a woman's biorhythm. Just a hand, foot, or an ear will do it.
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