A lady goes to the bar on a cruise ship and orders a Scotch with

two drops of water. The bartender gives her the drink, and she

says, "I'm on this cruise to celebrate my 80th birthday and it's

today." The bartender says, "Well, since it's your birthday,

this one is on me."

As the woman finishes her drink, the woman to her right says, "I

would like to buy you a drink, too." The woman says, "Thank you,

how sweet of you. OK then, Bartender, I want a Scotch with two

drops of water."

"Coming up," says the bartender. As she finishes that drink, the

man to her left says, "I would like to buy you a drink too." The

woman says, "Thank you very much my dear. Bartender, I'll have

another Scotch with two drops of water."

"Coming right up," the bartender says. As he gives her the drink

this time, he says, "Ma'am, I'm dying of curiosity. Why the

Scotch with only two drops of water?"

The old woman giggles and replies, "Sonny, when you're my age,

you've learned how to hold your liquor. Water, however, is a

whole other issue!"

Nice!