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A guy sees a sign in front of a house "Talking Dog for

Sale." He

rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the back yard.

The

guy goes into the back yard and sees a mutt sitting there.

"You talk?" he asks.

"Yep," the mutt replies.

"So, what's your story?"

The mutt looks up and says, "Well, I discovered this gift pretty

young

and I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA about my gift,

and in no time they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in

rooms with spies and world leaders, 'cause no one figured a dog would

be

eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable spies eight years

running.

"The jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't

getting any

younger and I wanted to settle down. So I signed up for a job at the

airport to do some undercover security work, mostly wandering near

suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible

dope dealings there, thwarted a couple of hijackings and was

responsible

for the arrest of several terrorists. If only I hadn't been out in

California and instead had been at the right airport on 9-11...

Anyway, I was promoted to GS-13 and awarded a batch of medals. Had a

wife, a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired." The guy is

amazed.

He goes

back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog. The owner says

"Ten dollars." The guy says he'll buy him but asks the

owner, "This dog

is amazing. Why on earth are you selling him?" The owner

replies, "I'm

sick of his lies."

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