Desperately Needing Your Advice

[Andrew Hicks]

This is my scenario.

"I came to Thailand on holiday for the first time and fell hopelessly in love with a fabulously beautiful girl in Pattaya. I know she loved me too and she wasn't a bar girl of course.

Anyway I had to go back to England as I had a good job as a call centre supervisor and I kept sending her money until my next visit. After a year I gave in my notice and came out to live with her.

I found her a bit strange and when we went to stay in her village there was this guy, her cousin living in the house who seemed to resent me being there. It was okay if I shelled out the money all the time so that's what I did.

Anyway I built her a house and after a bit I told her I couldn't keep spending as I'd almost run out of money. Then one day she's gone and the cousin tells me she's back in Pattaya. I say she can't be and we have a fist fight and he tells me to go and never come back. I don't think I can go back as I'm dead scared of him now.

Anyway I went to Pattaya to find her, though some of my mates say it's a dangerous place. They were right too as when I was going into his condominium to visit a bloke I'd met in a bar there was a scream and I was hit by something and smashed to the ground. It was him falling from his balcony on the tenth floor. He wasn't badly hurt as he had a soft landing but I've got multiple fractures and a possible injury to my brain.

I was rushed to a hospital in Bangkok and am an inpatient there. It's dead expensive and I'm down to my last few baht. It's a real crisis and I'm absolutely desperate."

So that's my scenario... the scenario for my next novel.

As I've finished my last book, I'm sitting here in my house in the rice fields with nothing to do and I desperately need to start a new one. Will this scenario work do you think?

Based on Thai Visa posts I think it's realistic but maybe it's not desperate enough.

And how do you think it should end?

Thoughts and suggestions will be much appreciated.

Andrew

[mrtoad]

And how do you think it should end?

Thoughts and suggestions will be much appreciated.

Andrew

He falls in love with a Ladyboy nurse, who takes him out of the hospital and they live happily ever after.

[tuky]

Perhaps you do find her in PTY, she suggests you got back to the room to chat in private instead of at the bar and you agree.

When you get back to the room the 'cousin' is waiting in the room, due to your head injuries you have no recollection of the event but somehow you ended up the one going out the window.

That is more believable than him going out the window and landing on you.

[Carib]

Come on, not this cheap everyday as usual pattaya scenario, if we want to read something like this, all we have to do is read a local newspaper, or wait for Libya to post...

[teacup]

And that was infact a mental hospital where he ended up seeing his whole high school graduation class.

[vegas]

Make the cousin a zombie, the girlfriend a vampire and you a werewolf, and I think you have a winner.

[AFKAFSinLOS]

Any credibility you might think you had as an author has just took a nosedive if you're looking for inspiration like this. This type of storyline is best left to places like Thai Visa and internet blogs...

That said, if your aim is to sell books, you wouldn't be the first to make money from a product that has no artistic merit whatsoever...

On the other hand if you're looking for artistic recognition, I'd have to say... what utter drivel...

[JOHN2]

This is my scenario.

"I came to Thailand on holiday for the first time and fell hopelessly in love with a fabulously beautiful girl in Pattaya. I know she loved me too and she wasn't a bar girl of course.

Anyway I had to go back to England as I had a good job as a call centre supervisor and I kept sending her money until my next visit. After a year I gave in my notice and came out to live with her.

I found her a bit strange and when we went to stay in her village there was this guy, her cousin living in the house who seemed to resent me being there. It was okay if I shelled out the money all the time so that's what I did.

Anyway I built her a house and after a bit I told her I couldn't keep spending as I'd almost run out of money. Then one day she's gone and the cousin tells me she's back in Pattaya. I say she can't be and we have a fist fight and he tells me to go and never come back. I don't think I can go back as I'm dead scared of him now.

Anyway I went to Pattaya to find her, though some of my mates say it's a dangerous place. They were right too as when I was going into his condominium to visit a bloke I'd met in a bar there was a scream and I was hit by something and smashed to the ground. It was him falling from his balcony on the tenth floor. He wasn't badly hurt as he had a soft landing but I've got multiple fractures and a possible injury to my brain.

I was rushed to a hospital in Bangkok and am an inpatient there. It's dead expensive and I'm down to my last few baht. It's a real crisis and I'm absolutely desperate."

So that's my scenario... the scenario for my next novel.

As I've finished my last book, I'm sitting here in my house in the rice fields with nothing to do and I desperately need to start a new one. Will this scenario work do you think?

Based on Thai Visa posts I think it's realistic but maybe it's not desperate enough.

And how do you think it should end?

Thoughts and suggestions will be much appreciated.

Andrew

YAWN these types of stories have been done so many times now,i wouldn't buy the book that's for sure.

Is the girls name Noi?

Edited July 29, 2008 by JOHN2

[onzestan]

At what floor is the hospital room, and does it have a terrace????

drive safely

onzestan

[Andrew Hicks]

Any credibility you might think you had as an author has just took a nosedive if you're looking for inspiration like this. This type of storyline is best left to places like Thai Visa and internet blogs...

That said, if your aim is to sell books, you wouldn't be the first to make money from a product that has no artistic merit whatsoever...

On the other hand if you're looking for artistic recognition, I'd have to say... what utter drivel...

Falling expats!!

Didn't cross your mind this might be spoof? That it's just a bit of fun?

So Thaivisa IS the right place for it then!

[bendix]

I seriously hope it is a spoof Andrew. Jeez . . . those kind of novels are ten a penny.

Side question. Have you read Rattawat Lapcharoensap's collected "Sightseeing". Wonderful wonderful stuff.

[dhind1]

I am no author, though I do read more than most, however the plot seems just a bit tired - done before. The twist with your friend falling on you and you ending up in the hospital is interesting though.

I would really like to see a book about the unsung heroes in Thailand. The white knights if you will. We hear all of the bad stories similar to the initial plot you outline, but we never hear about the good stuff.

The girl who was saved and set up for life by ..... (farang). The waitress who was stiffed for a bill in the bar and the farang who paid the bill out of kindness - no strings attached.

There have to be almost as many of these stories as there are stories about rip-offs.

Time for a book about the White Knights!

[astral]

Some research on the real life of Charles Sobhraj may give you food for thought...........

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charles_Sobhraj

[JOHN2]

Any credibility you might think you had as an author has just took a nosedive if you're looking for inspiration like this. This type of storyline is best left to places like Thai Visa and internet blogs...

That said, if your aim is to sell books, you wouldn't be the first to make money from a product that has no artistic merit whatsoever...

On the other hand if you're looking for artistic recognition, I'd have to say... what utter drivel...

Falling expats!!

Didn't cross your mind this might be spoof? That it's just a bit of fun?

So Thaivisa IS the right place for it then!

Now you're talking in riddles.

You should quit while you're still ahead.

[Jai Dee]

Didn't cross your mind this might be spoof? That it's just a bit of fun?

So Thaivisa IS the right place for it then!

Topic moved to Pub Forum.

/Moved.

[PeaceBlondie]

Yes, Andrew, it was so incredibly stupid for a plot, I hoped it was a spoof. We were just joking and moaning at the Writer's Group last week, how many Thailand fiction plots have to have eyeball-eating cobras, stupid farang gives everything to hooker, ends up on heroin, etc. My novel may never sell, but it ain't that formulaic.

My plot is so different I cannot explain it on ThaiVisa. Censored.

[zzdocxx]

My goodness.

[funfun]

Make the cousin a zombie, the girlfriend a vampire and you a werewolf, and I think you have a winner.

especially if written in thai, with some cartoon pictures of course, and no more than 20 pages!!!

[Sir Burr]

Yet another 'novel' warning of the dangers of Thai girls for innocent Westerners?

It's been done and over-done.

Private Dancer is the definitive book for this kinda crap.

[lardy]

I think it would be better made into one of the Thai soaps there seems plenty of scope for a ghost to come into play and numerous distraught looks and overacting..........apart from that its crap.

Talking of crap I went to the Honda Jazz website as we are thinking of buying one and the "jazz" video is hilarious!! Schoolgirls skipping in silly skirts and of course no real info on the car at all, ended up downloading a pdf brochure from Indonesia. I like the fact they dont show fuel consumption figures anywhere in Thailand.

[Chaimai]

I was rushed to a hospital in Bangkok and am an inpatient there. It's dead expensive and I'm down to my last few baht. It's a real crisis and I'm absolutely desperate."

Andrew

Haven't had time to read your full post but I was so touched by the time that I reached this point that I had to pause to wipe a tear from my eye.

Poor bloke - I really feel for you, and your story almost mirrors mine except that I have not yet run out of money and I am still financing the family (including that "cousin").

Anyway, because I have more money than you I would like to send you 200,000 Baht towards your hospital bills and recovery. I am also thinking of arranging a charity golf day to create a trust fund for you in case you suffer a repeat of this tragic incident. Hopefully, we can raise a further 300,000 Baht.

I just need you to send me your full bank account details together with your credit card numbers - don't forget to let me have those 3 numbers on the back of the card otherwise I cannot reclaim tax relief on the donation to you.

[farang555]

write real stories not fiction!

real always more interesting espc. with photo of farang and his lovely little brown creature. and house built by fanag. and photo of cousin of course!

[Andrew Hicks]

Yes, Andrew, it was so incredibly stupid for a plot, I hoped it was a spoof. We were just joking and moaning at the Writer's Group last week, how many Thailand fiction plots have to have eyeball-eating cobras, stupid farang gives everything to hooker, ends up on heroin, etc. My novel may never sell, but it ain't that formulaic.

My plot is so different I cannot explain it on ThaiVisa. Censored.

Of course it was a spoof. I've read so many vaguely similar pleas on Thaivisa, though none of the complainants have been hit by falling expats.

I was hoping for some funny replies so keep them coming.

On the serious issue of plot in Thai-based stories I entirely agree with you. Being eaten by sharks and gunned down by drug runners in "Tha Beach" and being killed in a Mercedes full of snakes (Bangkok 8) is just a load of cobras.

My own novel is almost plot free. Boy comes to Thailand, falls hopelessly in love and is refused, eventually winning the girl's heart if not her body before he gets back on the plane and reverts to type.

Romeo and Juliet without the coffins and nobody hit by falling expats.

Reality doesn't have to be murky.

[Chaimai]

My own novel is almost plot free. Boy comes to Thailand, falls hopelessly in love and is refused, eventually winning the girl's heart if not her body before he gets back on the plane and reverts to type.

Romeo and Juliet without the coffins and nobody hit by falling expats.

Reality doesn't have to be murky.

I, for one, preferred the original story line - much closer to the truth and far more plausible

[farang555]

TRUE LIFW WITH THE VILLAGE PEEPLE is a movie waiting to be made

[dougieboy]

And how do you think it should end?

Thoughts and suggestions will be much appreciated.

Andrew

He falls in love with a Ladyboy nurse, who takes him out of the hospital and they live happily ever after.

lol

[AFKAFSinLOS]

Any credibility you might think you had as an author has just took a nosedive if you're looking for inspiration like this. This type of storyline is best left to places like Thai Visa and internet blogs...

That said, if your aim is to sell books, you wouldn't be the first to make money from a product that has no artistic merit whatsoever...

On the other hand if you're looking for artistic recognition, I'd have to say... what utter drivel...

Falling expats!!

Didn't cross your mind this might be spoof? That it's just a bit of fun?

So Thaivisa IS the right place for it then!

No didn't cross my mind for a minute... Sounds just like your particular "genre"...

[PeaceBlondie]

Let's see...Bill Gates decides to chuck it all, leaves his wife all the money, and escapes to Outer Isaan and becomes a rice farmer....falls in love with his housekeeper's grandmother, who is the village shaman. She converts him to a frog and they hop happily into a klong...

[Chaimai]

Let's see...Bill Gates decides to chuck it all, leaves his wife all the money, and escapes to Outer Isaan and becomes a rice farmer....falls in love with his housekeeper's grandmother, who is the village shaman. She converts him to a frog and they hop happily into a klong...

I think somebody has not been taking their tablets - chai mai ?

[roygsd]

This is my scenario.

"I came to Thailand on holiday for the first time and fell hopelessly in love with a fabulously beautiful girl in Pattaya. I know she loved me too and she wasn't a bar girl of course.

Anyway I had to go back to England as I had a good job as a call centre supervisor and I kept sending her money until my next visit. After a year I gave in my notice and came out to live with her.

I found her a bit strange and when we went to stay in her village there was this guy, her cousin living in the house who seemed to resent me being there. It was okay if I shelled out the money all the time so that's what I did.

Anyway I built her a house and after a bit I told her I couldn't keep spending as I'd almost run out of money. Then one day she's gone and the cousin tells me she's back in Pattaya. I say she can't be and we have a fist fight and he tells me to go and never come back. I don't think I can go back as I'm dead scared of him now.

Anyway I went to Pattaya to find her, though some of my mates say it's a dangerous place. They were right too as when I was going into his condominium to visit a bloke I'd met in a bar there was a scream and I was hit by something and smashed to the ground. It was him falling from his balcony on the tenth floor. He wasn't badly hurt as he had a soft landing but I've got multiple fractures and a possible injury to my brain.

I was rushed to a hospital in Bangkok and am an inpatient there. It's dead expensive and I'm down to my last few baht. It's a real crisis and I'm absolutely desperate."

So that's my scenario... the scenario for my next novel.

As I've finished my last book, I'm sitting here in my house in the rice fields with nothing to do and I desperately need to start a new one. Will this scenario work do you think?

Based on Thai Visa posts I think it's realistic but maybe it's not desperate enough.

And how do you think it should end?

Thoughts and suggestions will be much appreciated.

Andrew

The moral of the story must be " dont become an inpatient type of guy"

roy gsd