Thai Jokes

[Neeranam]

I heard one today which was pretty bad, it went something like -

"pom seu yaa meuwan, paeng maak 40,000 baht."

to which I replied,

"wow, yaa arai?"

and got the punchline

yaa maha

any better ones?

[Abandon]

I don't get it

Only one I know of is 'which fish has 2 faces - tuna fish'

Oh, and the other one - which rodent is not clever (nu arai mai chalaat)

when you ask 'dunno which one' they reply 'nu mai ru ....' hehe it's actually quite funny that one.

[Totster]

I don't get it

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

it's pretty basic humour really... not that funny, but groan worthy.

totster

[Abandon]

I still don't get it - "I bought some medicine yesterday, it was very expensive - 40 000 baht"

"what medicine?"

Yaa maha

what is yaa maha ??

[Neeranam]

what is yaa maha ??

A brand of motorbike.

Come on someone must know a funny Thai joke?

[DJ Moore]

I heard one today which was pretty bad, it went something like -

"pom seu yaa meuwan, paeng maak 40,000 baht."

to which I replied,

"wow, yaa arai?"

and got the punchline

yaa maha

any better ones?

Thai politeness:

Four Thai's were standing out in a torrential monsoon rain without an umbrella, when all of a sudden they spotted an umbrella laying on the ground next to them....... Guess what happened next.........

Nothing they all stood there and continued getting wet.

[DJ Moore]

I heard one today which was pretty bad, it went something like -

Opppppps sorry I just notice Thai language................. DJM

[RamdomChances]

What horse is red.......................A tomato

I'll let you translate yourselfs. I actually think its funier in English which does'nt say a lot

[~G~]

Pandit, sorry I don't undestand the "nu mai ru" punchline. care to explain?

(EDIT: OK, straightforward enough, got it...)

A funny one:

Arab glooa a-rai? glooa laan pook!

Another one which makes many thais laugh but I fail to understand the humor:

Gai song kah mee gee dtua? mee took dtua!

Edited August 29, 2005 by ~G~

[meadish_sweetball]

Apart from meaning 'rat, mouse' - 'nuu' is also a personal pronoun - used both in the first and the third person. So when you answer 'mai ruu' to the question, they say 'nuu mai ruu' which can mean three different things

'the rhodent who doesn't know' (could be the answer to the question)

'I dont know' (using 'nuu' as a first person pronoun)

'You don't know' (using 'nuu' as a third person pronoun).

[~G~]

Apart from meaning 'rat, mouse'  - 'nuu' is also a personal pronoun - used both in the first and the third person. So when you answer 'mai ruu' to the question, they say 'nuu mai ruu' which can mean three different things

'the rhodent who doesn't know' (could be the answer to the question)

'I dont know' (using 'nuu' as a first person pronoun)

'You don't know' (using 'nuu' as a third person pronoun).

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Makes more sense now. What about the chicken one? I understand it has something to do with several meanings of "dtua".

[The_Moog]

A Singaporean and an Thai man took a creativity test and they were sent into separate rooms to take the test.

Inside each room there were two tools. The men were asked to make something useful with whatever they could find in the room, using the tools. One hour passed. The Singaporean man stepped out of the room, showed the jury a state of the art, albeit blatant copy of an American gadget he had created.

Two hours passed. The Thai man walked out of the room and told the jury that he lost one tool and broken the other.

[steveromagnino]

I have noted who said what, and Moog and DJ Moore are ready for a slap upside the head for idiotic racist jokes so far ya clowns....Y do you even bother to live here?!

so here is mine...

USA decided to commission a new roadshow to promote manufacturing USA brands in CHina for the SE ASian market. They decided to get pitches for the production of the road show from 3 countries: Thailand, Singapore and China.

The Singaporean guy was first, and said $1m USD, based on an extensive logistics study that revealed ways to produce the roadshow out of MDF, using the latest in laser inkjet printing and sourcing local talent. The Americans were well impressed.

The Chinese guy was next, and said he could do it for $500k USD, based on cheap labour, loss leading and no margin. He said he wanted the work, to develop a relationship and expertise with the roadshow type of work. The Americans then turned to the Thai contractor...

The Thai bidder said "2.5m USD"

When asked why are you so much more than the other two bidders, the answer came as follows:

"1m for you, 1m for me, and we get the Chinese guy to do it"

Or a Thai joke/school boy howler

Pee arai kuen rot mair mai dai

Mai roo.....

Pee sahm baht

Dtuek arai yoo nai nam

Dtuek bplar mairt

Kuat arai yoo kahng tanon

Kuat dumroi

Phoochai chorp hart arai mahk tee soot nai bprataet Thai

Hart sa-ee

etc etc

[Abandon]

[BambinA]

Dtuek arai yoo nai nam

Dtuek bplar mairt

Kuat arai yoo kahng tanon

Kuat dumroi

Phoochai chorp hart arai mahk tee soot nai bprataet Thai

Hart sa-ee

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

LAMOK

[Totster]

what is yaa maha ??

A brand of motorbike.

Come on someone must know a funny Thai joke?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Jokes all over the place...

Pandit - Maha = Large

totster

[BambinA]

Q -Phee arai thee Pooh Ying Klau mak?? ( Spoonerism)

ผีอะไร ที่ผู้หญิงกลัวมาก

Ans

-Phee KraChak Hua ผีกระชากหัว

-Phee Tee Hua ผีตีหัว

-Phee Pao Hua ผีเผาหัว

-Phee Tae Hua ผีเตะหัว

Q-What is the difference between a girl in a church and a girl in a a bathtub?

A-A girl in a church has a soul in her hope, but a girl in a bathtub has a soap in her hole

Edited August 29, 2005 by BambinA

[loong]

2 Girls in the bath

1 says "Where's the Soap"

The other says "It sure does!"

Oops! Not a Thai Joke

Sorry

[BambinA]

what'd girl do in winter with cold weather ?? ( Spoonerism)

A ) Hun Tood Hai Daad หันตูดให้แดด

B ) Hun Tood Hai Done Daad หันตูดให้โดนแดด

C ) Hai Daad Lia Tood ให้แดดเลียตูด

D ) Correct all

answer (D) ..coz all make body is in HEAT

Edited August 29, 2005 by BambinA

[Neeranam]

A ) Hun Tood Hai Daad หันตูดให้แดด

B ) Hun Tood Hai Done Daad หันตูดให้โดนแดด

C ) Hai Daad Lia Tood ให้แดดเลียตูด

D ) Correct all

answer (D) ..coz all make body is in HEAT

That's more like it!

[withnail]

Can someone write the following in Thai, I'm not sure if I'm missing something or if they're just not that funny?

Or a Thai joke/school boy howler

Pee arai kuen rot mair mai dai

Mai roo.....

Pee sahm baht

Dtuek arai yoo nai nam

Dtuek bplar mairt

Kuat arai yoo kahng tanon

Kuat dumroi

Phoochai chorp hart arai mahk tee soot nai bprataet Thai

Hart sa-ee

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

[Totster]

I heard one today which was pretty bad, it went something like -

"pom seu yaa meuwan, paeng maak 40,000 baht."

to which I replied,

"wow, yaa arai?"

and got the punchline

yaa maha   

any better ones?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Just told this one to the missus... she burst out laughing and said it was very good, she hadn't heard it before..

totster

[BambinA]

Pee arai kuen rot mair mai dai ผีอะไร ขึ้นรถเมล์ไม่ได้

Mai roo.....ไม่รู้

Pee sahm baht ผีสามบาท

Dtuek arai yoo nai nam ตึกอะไรอยู่ในน้ำ

Dtuek bplar mairt ตึกปลาแหมด

Kuat arai yoo kahng tanon ขวดอะไรอยู่กลางถนน

Kuat dumroi ขวดตำรวย

Phoochai chorp hart arai mahk tee soot nai bprataet Thai ผู้ชายชอบหาดอะไรมากที่สุดในประเทศไทย

Hart sa-ee หาดสะอี๋

[Totster]

สะอี๋

what does it mean..?

totster

[BambinA]

สะอี๋

what does it mean..?

totster 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

after convert this Hart sa-ee หาดสะอี๋ ( Spoonerism)

i dont dare to tell

but it mean something under the navel in female is really clean !!

bambi (emmmm really claen!)

Edited August 29, 2005 by BambinA

[Totster]

สะอี๋

what does it mean..?

totster 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

after convert this Hart sa-ee หาดสะอี๋ ( Spoonerism)

i dont dare to tell

but it mean something under the navel in female is really clean !!

bambi (emmmm really claen!)

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Oh... hee hee hee...

totster

[BambinA]

Oh... hee hee hee...   

totster 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

heee heeee heeeeeeeeeee really clean

[withnail]

Pee sahm baht ผีสามบาท

Does this have a double meaning that I'm missing?

Or is it just a crap joke?

[Neeranam]

QUOTE

Pee sahm baht ผีสามบาท

Does this have a double meaning that I'm missing?

Or is it just a crap joke?

Pee sahm baht is a famous Thai ghost movie, pretty good too.

[steveromagnino]

I think it is a pretty bad joke, but we seem to be in a cycle of school boy howlers, so I felt a need to keep the ride going :-)

Phooying ahyoo noi gup phooying mee ahyoo laew. walah chee gor dtaek dtung yung rai

mai roo

phooying ahyoo noi chip chee chip chee

phooying mee ahyoo laew chee chip chee chip

ok... and just for Withnaul, I will try for Thai, how do you make the font size bigger than microscopic?

[SIZE=14]

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