Dying Girlfriend?

[richardb]

I retain great affection for an ex girlfriend. Lately she has been saying she has been unwell and I understood she was having some tests at Banglamung hospital.

Today I recieved a phone call from two girls on my exs phone ( barely understandable English ) That she is in Banglamung hospital and very sick and may die. I ask when will she get better they seem to think she will not. I tell them to get her to go to a bar I know so I can speak to a mutual English friend and find out whats occuring. They say she cannt leave hospital. They say she is too sick evenn to go out to use the ATM ( I just checked her account on line no transactions for a week ) Can I speak to her Ans no too sick. So what do they want me to do Ans nothing theyt are just telling me she is very ill . I say i will sort it on my next holiday in November they say she aint going to live that long. I dont know who the girls are and they did not ask me for money for the hospital or anything .

I am very worried

If I pm her full name can someone please call the Banglamung hospital to find out if she is there and whats wrong.

Thanks

[richardb]

Banglamung Hospital - 038 429 244

ps I would phone myself but I dont speak Thai

Thanks all

[Pattaya_Fox]

Banglamung Hospital - 038 429 244

ps I would phone myself but I dont speak Thai

Thanks all

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Well if I were you I`d ring the hospital myself I am sure there are people there who speak English.

Have you tried?

[richardb]

Banglamung Hospital - 038 429 244

ps I would phone myself but I dont speak Thai

Thanks all

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Well if I were you I`d ring the hospital myself I am sure there are people there who speak English.

Have you tried?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

If you were me you would engage brain before posting. If you have nothing helpful to say shut the f*** up.

Banglamung hospital seems to have at first instance an automated switchboard.... for accident and emergency press one etc . I say seems to have as I cant understand the automated Thai message I get when I phone.

I can understand that 99 % of readers will have no interest in assisting a perfect stranger with an enquiry of this nature and so be it. If you cannt help ignore this post. If you can please pm me and I will get straight back to you.

Richard

[britmaveric]

I'm quite sure one of our native thai members will contact the hospital on your behalf. PM the number and goodluck. (awfulsituation not knowing whats going on)

[Pattaya_Fox]

Banglamung Hospital - 038 429 244

ps I would phone myself but I dont speak Thai

Thanks all

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Well if I were you I`d ring the hospital myself I am sure there are people there who speak English.

Have you tried?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

If you were me you would engage brain before posting. If you have nothing helpful to say shut the f*** up.

Banglamung hospital seems to have at first instance an automated switchboard.... for accident and emergency press one etc . I say seems to have as I cant understand the automated Thai message I get when I phone.

I can understand that 99 % of readers will have no interest in assisting a perfect stranger with an enquiry of this nature and so be it. If you cannt help ignore this post. If you can please pm me and I will get straight back to you.

Richard

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Amazing how clear it becomes when you explain things properly.

[Kringle]

PM me with her name and if you have her room number, and I can get my wife to check into the situation and get back to you. Send you email addy also and it'll get done.

Best I can offer,

Kringle

[richardb]

Thank you for your kind and speedy offers.

I do not want to abuse the trust of members by getting loads of members to make enquiries when one will do. So if you were going to offer Thanks a million but its taken care of.

I have pmd the relevant details.

I dont know if this is all for real infact I sincerely hope its all rubish and she is right as rain but I have a funny feeling.

Thanks again all

Richard

[Nam Kao]

Has anyone asked for $$?, could be a precursor to a buffalo story

[richardb]

No requests for money. I did send her 3000 baht for tests about a week ago she had said she was not well and wanted to go to the hospital but that money remains untouched in her account. Her friends ( their engligh was very bad ) seemed to be implying I should get myself over there pronto.

Time will reveal all.

Richard

ps I am sorry if I was a tad tetchy pattayafox I do/did like the girl and am somewhat anxious

Edited September 6, 2005 by richardb

[britmaveric]

Almost wish it were dosh involved - report back when you have more details.

[richardb]

Thanks to all who responded. I managed to get hold of an English guy who knows the girl and whom I trust implicitly. He tracked her down to the Banglamung hospital. He reckons the place is a bit of a ###### hole. Girly is not at all well and has been in for four days with pneumonia she is skinny as a rake and expected to be in for another few days at least. How she has pneumonia I have no idea. I did ask him if the nurse mentioned HIV but apparently not so thats something to be pleased about at least. So the little Ling will I hope live to give me grief on my next trip in November.

Do any of you remember the line " dont it always seen to go that yoiu dont know what youve got till its gone" We are not getting back together but I would hate for her to dissapear.

So crisis almost over and I say almost cause she is still pretty sick and I do want to find out how she got ill.

Cheers all

Richard

[gharknes]

Sad indeed Richard, I can almost understand how you feel, my girlfriend rang me one day to say she was sick and not eating, very rare for her, then next thing her sister rang me and said she was in hospital, being so far away (UK) you really feel so helpless, she is fine now but i can understand to a point what you are going through, please let us know the details once u find out, now that you have posted on here

good luck hope it's not too serious.

[Digger]

Hospitals will rarely divulge HIV status unless very specifically asked. Pneumonia is a symptom of advance stage HIV infection but otherwise quite rare in Thailand. Having said that if she has a weak immune system for other reasons, and then got soaked in a downpour - could well be pneumonia. Either way Banglamung hospital is pretty dire - cant you make arrangements to get her transfered to BKK Pattaya and have them charge your credit card if you are that concerned. They can send an ambulance and pick her up as well for about 1000 baht. BKK Pattaya is the only hospital in Pattaya with HIV specialists as well. If it is HIV related, thats the best place for her short of BKK hospitals.

[richardb]

Hospitals will rarely divulge HIV status unless very specifically asked.  Pneumonia is a symptom of advance stage HIV infection but otherwise quite rare in Thailand.  Having said that if she has a weak immune system for other reasons, and then got soaked in a downpour - could well be pneumonia.    Either way Banglamung hospital is pretty dire - cant you make arrangements to get her transfered to BKK Pattaya and have them charge your credit card if you are that concerned.  They can send an ambulance and pick her up as well for about 1000 baht.  BKK Pattaya is the only hospital in Pattaya with HIV specialists as well.  If it is HIV related, thats the best place for her short of BKK hospitals.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I have taken your sugestion and am running with it i just googled bangkok pattaya and they have a website and I have emailed them. She does have a week immune system she gets shingles. The HIV issue is of course in my mind I cant frankly even begin to contemplate what I would do if it is. Short of getting on a plane ( and I have thought about it ) I have to a degree rely on others having taken it upon myself to help.

Richard

[Boo]

whatever is wrong with her I hope she makes a full recovery & if it is HIV, with the right meds & care she can live a normal & healthy life. Thankfully she has someone looking out for her as decent treatment for the average thai is quite poor.

[wcr]

Firstly Richardb I hope things are settle a little now with your special friend? I am sorry to make a political point out of your problem, but due to the stupid comments made on another thread following the robbery of a possible gay man I want to make the following obsevations.

I was wondering what the reaction would be if this request was posted by a man enquiring about an old boyfriend. Would other people jump in to help out? Secondly following this story closely, he later posted saying the illness could be HIV/AIDS. What sort of comments would be posted here?

Just wondering

[Nickerelastic]

wcr out of order......normally it's me behaving like that.

richardb is concerned about a friend

[Digger]

Firstly Richardb I hope things are settle a little now with your special friend? I am sorry to make a political point out of your problem, but due to the stupid comments made on another thread following the robbery of a possible gay man I want to make the following obsevations.

I was wondering what the reaction would be if this request was posted by a man enquiring about an old boyfriend. Would other people jump in to help out? Secondly following this story closely, he later posted saying the illness could be HIV/AIDS. What sort of comments would be posted here?

Just wondering 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Having read through the thread, I would expect that the end result would have been the same - that is that the concerned friend, took it upon himself to explore different ideas to get the result he wanted - as it is he found out her situation without any assistance from other members of Thai Visa.com, so as not to waste other peoples time.

For example, my reply would have been the same, just insert he for she - perhaps its different when you have experienced a friend with this condition as I have. Cant speak for other posters and no doubt your right that the liklihood would have been comments along the lines of "well serves him right" etc. But that is just human behaviour and often a desire to try and find someone to blame.

Strangely enough, the purpose of my post was to try and offer words of encouragement, IF and its a big IF, the condition is HIV related, getting proper healthcare is critical to the situation. I can easily imagine the reaction in Banglamung hospital, similar to when my friend was diagnosed. They told her to go home and live a good remainder of her life, nothing really can be done. Well blow me down, she is now living a normal life, working and in great shape healthwise after getting some specialist medical care.

Unfortunately WCR you are not going to change people's inbuilt predujices all by yourself. In fact, my biggest concern for the girl who's treatment I pay for is that I worry if she will be sacked by her employer if and when they find out she has HIV, despite her just working in a convenience store - nothing to do with Bars, food or anything where she could risk passing on her condition to someone else. That one we will have to handle as and when it happens.

[the scouser]

Please don't use this thread to rubbish Richard and his intentions. I'm sure he's worldly-wise enough to spot a scam.

I've already deleted one post made by a particularly poisonous t*at.

Scouse.

[cdnvic]

and I'm right behind you with another

If you have political, personal opinions about hiv, or whatever, take it somewhere other than this thread.

A little decency goes a long way.

cv

[rocky]

Please don't use this thread to rubbish Richard and his intentions. I'm sure he's worldly-wise enough to spot a scam.

I've already deleted one post made by a particularly poisonous t*at.

Scouse.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

**as you've been told in private, take it elsewhere** (content deleted)

Edited September 8, 2005 by cdnvic

[Boo]

whether right or wrong this isn't the place to discuss it

[rocky]

whether right or wrong this isn't the place to discuss it

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

So let me get this right, we are not to discuss matter about aids in a forum with a thread called

Replying to Dying Girlfriend?

So can you tell me where to discuss this ?

[chuchok]

whether right or wrong this isn't the place to discuss it

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

So let me get this right, we are not to discuss matter about aids in a forum with a thread called

Replying to Dying Girlfriend?

So can you tell me where to discuss this ?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Holiday for Rocky comming up I think.

[Boo]

no one has said that the gf has aids just that she is sick in hospital. If you want to discuss the aids virus I suggest you go to the heath section & start a thread there.

[the scouser]

Rocky,

And if it's to be a discussion on hiv/aids, perhaps we could have informed comments, not your witless, ill-informed, pre-conceived ideas.

Scouse.

[richardb]

I retain great affection for an ex girlfriend.............Today I recieved a phone call from two girls on my exs phone ( barely understandable English ) That she is in Banglamung hospital and very sick and may die............

I am very worried

If I pm her full name can someone please call the Banglamung hospital to find out if she is there and whats wrong.

Thanks

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Two days ago alarmed and concerned that an exgirlfriend was ill I asked a bunch of strangers and not just strangers but strangers in a web forum where I am not even known through my posts and words for a simple favour.

A number of people volunteered to help me and more would have to I think if I had not posted to say I had offers of help. To everyone who offered their help I can only express my gratitude. The following day a member of this site was able to call in the hospital confirm she was in hospital and this was not a " buffalo " story and give me an idea of her condition.

How cool is that. Stop and think about it for a minute. For no reason apart from pure altruism a number of people went out of their way to help. I am sure that girly seeing falangs arriving can only have felt heartened. And I personally felt better that vicariously I had made contact and could begin to sort out the situation.

Every day you read bad news floods famine killing. So "upset and concerned man asks for help and gets it" will not make the front page of the Pattaya mail. Or maybe it will under the bizzare stories sectionafter all we all know that only bad nasty fallangs live in Pattaya!!!!! Rollox there are a lot of decent and good blokes in the city as my experience proves.

Other matters:

I have made contact with two blokes I know who live in Pattaya who I think will help.

Update on girls condition

This afterneoon one of the blokes got a call from Banglamung to say pick her up she is ok. He went and she in his words looks like she has been in a concentration camp. lots of food and water right as rain they say. However she can hardly walk. 7500 Baht for five days. He is not convinced she is ok and tomorow I think she goes to Bangkok Pattaya Hospital. I think its wise.

HIV

I cannt discount the possibility and am not foolish enough to ignore it due to her symptoms. I shall in due course get myself checked as a precaution as some years ago we were intimate ( though there were always three of us in the relatonship me her and Mr codom ) but the bottom line is that as UK national I am unlikely to die I will recieve the best treatment. She on the other hand has no access to treatment and given her present condition will be entirely reliant on me for some time and possibly in a worse case senario for ever and for ever is a long time. Anything else I say or wish to know about HIV in thailand I will say or ask in a thread appropriate to that subject.

My motives and actions and general sanity.

It is intimated that I am a fool to offer my help to a Thai ex girlfriend. Its true that a fool and his money are easily parted and this episode is likely to cost me plenty. I will though one day look back on my life and say , if I was a fool I was a happy fool. I wont ask more than that.

My life and circumstances could be regarded by some as tragedy, comedy or even farce. I beg to differ . I value insight opinion and observation if thats what it is and do read carefully what people say.

Of course I wish she never got ill its a drain emotionally and will likely be one finacially also.I have weighed matter up the cost of helping and not helping and the thing is I have now made my decision I want the girl better and have started to take steps to make that happen.

As they say in Thailand.

Up to me

Thanks again to all the top people who have pmd me and helped me.

Richard

[britmaveric]

Cheers for the update. I know if I was in a similar situation I'd be banging me head against the wall. Anyways I dare say not one of us here wouldn't help if the situation was verifiable and in your shoes. Good on you. Head up and get yourself checked out.

[Rumpole]

A nice post, Richard, and a difficult decision. Good for you.