Chuck Norris is having a comeback of sorts. I just heard about the Chuck Norris fact-site and had to check it out. Here are some of my favorites:

Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris.

Most people have 23 pairs of chromosomes. Chuck Norris has 72... and they're all poisonous.

There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.

When Chuck Norris goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.

Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting.... CHUCK NORRIS GOES KILLING

The agent of Chuck Norris asked Chuck if he wanted to be in Brokeback Mountain. Chuck Norris' agent has been missing for almost 2 years now. Never ask Chuck Norris to be in a gay cowboy movie.

When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.

Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer, unfortunately Check Norris has never cried.

Link

The agent of Chuck Norris asked Chuck if he wanted to be in Brokeback Mountain. Chuck Norris' agent has been missing for almost 2 years now.

The agent of Chuck Norris asked Chuck if he wanted to be in Brokeback Mountain. Chuck Norris' agent has been missing for almost 2 years now. Never ask Chuck Norris to be in a gay cowboy movie.

Link

No straight man dresses the way Chuck does in those posters at the top. He looks like a back-up Village Person.

cv

The agent of Chuck Norris asked Chuck if he wanted to be in Brokeback Mountain. Chuck Norris' agent has been missing for almost 2 years now. Never ask Chuck Norris to be in a gay cowboy movie.

Link

No straight man dresses the way Chuck does in those posters at the top. He looks like a back-up Village Person.

cv

Actually, I agree with you, but don't tell Boon Mee!

Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting.... CHUCK NORRIS GOES KILLING

Sounds like Chuck and Cheney would get along, jest fine pardner ! (Unless Cheney "accidentally" shot Chuck, then there'd be a bloodbath as Chuck wiped out Cheney, his Secret Service contingent and the rest of his entourage).

Of course, Chuck was a former serviceman. He learned Karate while stationed in Okinawa.

In the late 60's/early 70's they used to compete in school gymnasiums (no soft mats for these guys). Chuck, Billy Blanks, Bill "Superfoot" Wallace, Joe Frazier (not the boxer). Chuck used to kick-ass in those tournaments.

Chuck Norris's early claim to fame was his fight scene with Bruce Lee in "Return of the Dragon", where he fought with Bruce in the old Roman Coliseum. Still considered one of the best movie fight scenes ever.

After that came a string of B movies like The Octagon and The Hitman. Not exactly top-shelf roles. Lone Wolf McQuade was arguably his best movie, and set the stage for the TV series Walker, Texas Ranger.

For what ever reason, Chuck never quite made it to the "A" list in Hollyweird (unlike Jean-Claude van Damme and Steven Seagal). Too bad as I think he's a better actor than either of those 2.

For what ever reason, Chuck never quite made it to the "A" list in Hollyweird

I think it's because he is as stiff as a dime-store wooden Indian.

The agent of Chuck Norris asked Chuck if he wanted to be in Brokeback Mountain. Chuck Norris' agent has been missing for almost 2 years now. Never ask Chuck Norris to be in a gay cowboy movie.

Link

No straight man dresses the way Chuck does in those posters at the top. He looks like a back-up Village Person.

cv

Actually, I agree with you, but don't tell Boon Mee!

Well, don't worry boys, I don't have a Chuck Norris poster on my bedroom wall!

I would have used Oliver North for the subject of this thread but like the title says...On The Lighter Side?

Or, would y'all prefer a Barbara Striesand take-down?

I would have used Oliver North for the subject of this thread but like the title says...On The Lighter Side?

No making light of genuine heroes!

I would have used Oliver North for the subject of this thread but like the title says...On The Lighter Side?

No making light of genuine heroes!

Heroic for being a talk show host, or for selling weapons to a country you claim in other threads is dangerous?

cv

I would have used Oliver North for the subject of this thread but like the title says...On The Lighter Side?

No making light of genuine heroes!

Heroic for being a talk show host, or for selling weapons to a country you claim in other threads is dangerous?

cv

Actually, I never paid much attention to Oliver North, just figured that little comment would generate some controversy, however, he was a Marine. That's impresive enough for me!

Actually, I never paid much attention to Oliver North, just figured that little comment would generate some controversy, however, he was a Marine. That's impresive enough for me!

So was Lee Harvey Oswald.

cv

Actually, I never paid much attention to Oliver North, just figured that little comment would generate some controversy, however, he was a Marine. That's impresive enough for me!

So was Lee Harvey Oswald.

cv

Hey !! No slagging Col North !

He holds a Congressional Record (for saying "I have no clear recollection of that sir" around 180+ times while being questioned during the Iran-Contra affair).

Y'all remember that don't you ? The US wanted to sell weapons to Iran to help them in their war with Iraq (and to try and get some hostages freed that Hezbollah was holding in Lebanon). This is after the US had imposed sanctions on Iran for their hostage-taking incident during the Iran revolution.

(note: "Hezbollah proceeded to take more hostages after they had released old ones, and failing to produce any meaningful results, the arms-for-hostages program was cancelled later that same year.")

"In January of 1986, the administration approved a plan proposed by Robert McFarlane employee Michael Ledeen, whereby an intermediary would sell arms to Iran in exchange for the release of the hostages, with proceeds made available to the Contras. At first, the Iranians had refused the weapons from Manucher Ghorbanifar, the Iranian intermediary, when both Oliver North and Ghorbanifar created a 370% markup."

The money generated by the sale was funneled to the rebel Contras in Nicaragua, who were fighting the socialist Sandinistas.

And who was in charge at the time ? Republican President RONALD REAGAN !

"Both the sale of weapons to Iran and the funding of the Contras violated stated administration policy and legislation passed by the Congress."

"The Reagan administration circumvented this ban by using the National Security Council, which was not explicitly covered by the law, to supervise covert support. The NSC proceeded to raise private and foreign funds for the Contras. In addition, proceeds from the arms sales to Iran were used to purchase arms for the Contras in an arrangement instituted by Colonel Oliver North, aide to National Security Advisor John Poindexter."

"The scandal was compounded when on November 21, Oliver North and his secretary Fawn Hall shredded pertinent documents."

"North, indicted on nine counts, was initially convicted of three minor counts, although the conviction was later vacated upon appeal on the grounds that North's Fifth Amendment rights may have been violated."

Secretary of Defense Caspar Weinberger was indicted for allegedly lying to the Independent Counsel, but was later pardoned by President George H.W. Bush."

I guess we know where GWB get's his political ethics from now eh ?

Actually, I never paid much attention to Oliver North, just figured that little comment would generate some controversy, however, he was a Marine. That's impresive enough for me!

So was Lee Harvey Oswald.

cv

I know.

In Boot Camp they used to tell us what a great Marine he was because he made such a difficult shot.

It was kind of a joke - I think?

Actually, I never paid much attention to Oliver North, just figured that little comment would generate some controversy, however, he was a Marine. That's impresive enough for me!

So was Lee Harvey Oswald.

cv

So was Audie Murphy...

Actually, I never paid much attention to Oliver North, just figured that little comment would generate some controversy, however, he was a Marine. That's impresive enough for me!

So was Lee Harvey Oswald.

cv

So was Audie Murphy...

Don't forget Chesty Puller!

a country you claim in other threads is dangerous?

That was then, this is now...

May I use that line when someone says "The French surrenders easily" or "We saved you in WW2"?

I'll credit you with the quote of course.

May I use that line when someone says "The French surrenders easily" or "We saved you in WW2"?

I'll credit you with the quote of course.

Butterfly's buddy, Mr. "Right-Wing".

Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting.... CHUCK NORRIS GOES KILLING

Sounds like Chuck and Cheney would get along, jest fine pardner ! (Unless Cheney "accidentally" shot Chuck, then there'd be a bloodbath as Chuck wiped out Cheney, ......................

For what ever reason, Chuck never quite made it to the "A" list in Hollyweird (unlike Jean-Claude van Damme and Steven Seagal). Too bad as I think he's a better actor than either of those 2.

Exqueeeeeeze.. JCVD and SS never have been A list... maybe the top of B list....

Ex movie producer Roger