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The Last Word

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I wait with bated breath - or is it baited - can't be sure.

Hey, this is my 1000th post - thats got to deserve The Last Word.

It was your 1,000 post, but not anymore !!

Sheesh, I've probably got close to 1,000 posts in this thread alone ! :D

It'll take a lot more than 1,000 posts to get the Last Word here ! :D

251 actually :o so are you coming out for food tonight with the boys or what? You can bring a "friend" as long as it isnt the one we saw the other night :D:D:D

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I had a pithy reply typed out and even got as far as clicking the "Add Reply" button. Nothing seemed to happen though, as the page blanked and then froze. Very annoying.

Fortunately, it was a short, pithy reply, unlike the post I did on the TV Pissup yesterday that got wiped out when my 'net connection went down. :o

Not that it matters, but I'm sure some of you will be upset at missing one of my wonderful posts ! :D

Maybe I'll add another at a later time ! :D

I wait with bated breath - or is it baited - can't be sure.

Hey, this is my 1000th post - thats got to deserve The Last Word.

It is 'bated'. However, well done on the 1000 posts even though it's old news now!

Hallelujah, lock and load.

This reminds me of Lenard Cohen (spelling???) Hallelujah. One of the best songs ever!

Hallelujah, lock and load.

This reminds me of Lenard Cohen (spelling???) Hallelujah. One of the best songs ever!

I don't know that one. I got this from a Chemical Romace song. "I keep a gun on the book you gave me, hallelujah, lock and load."

:D

Ahkmed came to the United States from the Middle East, and he was only here a few months when he became very ill. :D

He went to doctor after doctor, but none of them could help him. :D

Finally, he went to an Arab doctor who said: "Take dees bocket, go into de odder room, poop in de bocket, pee on de poop, and den put your head down over de bocket and breathe in de fumes for ten minutes." :o

Ahkmed took the bucket, went into the other room, pooped in the bucket, peed on the poop, bent over and breathed in the fumes for ten minutes. :D

Coming back to the doctor he said, "It worked. I feel terrific! What was wrong with me?" :D

The doctor said ... "You were homesick. :D

TLW © :D

:D

Ahkmed came to the United States from the Middle East, and he was only here a few months when he became very ill. :D

He went to doctor after doctor, but none of them could help him. :D

Finally, he went to an Arab doctor who said: "Take dees bocket, go into de odder room, poop in de bocket, pee on de poop, and den put your head down over de bocket and breathe in de fumes for ten minutes." :o

Ahkmed took the bucket, went into the other room, pooped in the bucket, peed on the poop, bent over and breathed in the fumes for ten minutes. :D

Coming back to the doctor he said, "It worked. I feel terrific! What was wrong with me?" :D

The doctor said ... "You were homesick. :D

TLW © :D

Erm, isn't there a thread for jokes?

How can you manage to be off topic in The Last Word? :D

  • Author
How can you manage to be off topic in The Last Word? :D

This seems to be one of the few topics where it's OK to go off topic, and most people do. In fact, most people have no idea what the original topic is (was) !

Which reminds me. Why are we here ? Why are you here ? Do you really think you have a chance at getting the Last Word ? :o

How can you manage to be off topic in The Last Word? :D

This seems to be one of the few topics where it's OK to go off topic, and most people do. In fact, most people have no idea what the original topic is (was) !

Which reminds me. Why are we here ? Why are you here ? Do you really think you have a chance at getting the Last Word ? :o

Who does have a chance?

Me?

No, me!

No, it's me!

Forever

.

.

.

.

.

If we want to end it then there would have to be pre-arranged rules like eg. Moderaters will choose a page number in advance and close when it reaches that number or something like that.

<snip>

How can you manage to be off topic in The Last Word? :o

by discussing soccer and weather conditions as done in this thread before. Ever wondered how it reached 114 pages already? Because of all the off topic drivel we had to suffer here.

  • Author

That's part of the suspense. You never know when this thread may be closed (if ever). Everyone wants to be "the one" who has the Last Word in one of the most popular threads ever (in Bedlam at least).

It could go on fore ever, or it could end...............NOW !

or.............NOW !!!!

Or not.

But if it had of ended.....................NOW..............I would have had the Last Word ! (suckers !) :o

This seems to be one of the few topics where it's OK to go off topic, and most people do.

Correction - that should read "off the wall." :o

  • Author

Most of the posters are "off the wall" and continuously post "off topic" responses that are usually "out to lunch" !

Sheesh, gotta turn off the news. Non-stop coverage of the same story on both channels (Faux and CNN).

Two different stations, but oddly enough, they seem to cover the exact same stories (not just breaking news articles), in very similar fashion, with the same "experts" and the same kind of "journalists" (for example, Greta van Susteren on Faux and Nancy Grace on CNN).

Keep watching these stations and soon I'll be thinking like Boon Mee :D , and finding Ann Coulter to be attractive :o !

That's part of the suspense. You never know when this thread may be closed (if ever). Everyone wants to be "the one" who has the Last Word in one of the most popular threads ever (in Bedlam at least).

It could go on fore ever, or it could end...............NOW !

or.............NOW !!!!

Or not.

But if it had of ended.....................NOW..............I would have had the Last Word ! (suckers !) :D

you really think they would do that? Are mods really that mean??? Was that discussing moderation issues??? :o

  • Author
you really think they would do that? Are mods really that mean??? Was that discussing moderation issues??? :D

Careful now !

Threads being closed can happen for a number of reasons. The originator can request the thread be closed. It could be closed for wandering too far off topic :o or for turning into a meaningless flame-fest.

The reasons for closing a thread can be numerous.

None of which have anything to do with this thread ! Funny how some people never seem to get bored with posting in this thread.

(For the record, I'm not bored. I'm upset that the rest of you are so bored and have nothing better to do).

you really think they would do that? Are mods really that mean??? Was that discussing moderation issues??? :D

Careful now !

Threads being closed can happen for a number of reasons. The originator can request the thread be closed. It could be closed for wandering too far off topic :o or for turning into a meaningless flame-fest.

The reasons for closing a thread can be numerous.

None of which have anything to do with this thread ! Funny how some people never seem to get bored with posting in this thread.

(For the record, I'm not bored. I'm upset that the rest of you are so bored and have nothing better to do).

yeah..just read that stuff about the warning levels...now I sitting sh1t scared in front of my comp...can we get bonus points for contributing to meaningful threads like this one? :D

I also will not insult anyone in TLW anymore...unless they post again after me....

  • Author
yeah..just read that stuff about the warning levels...now I sitting sh1t scared in front of my comp...can we get bonus points for contributing to meaningful threads like this one? :D

I also will not insult anyone in TLW anymore...unless they post again after me....

Actually, anyone that posts here earns demerit points. That is why you don't see many posts by mods. Too many demerits and they get demoted to riff-raff ! :D

As for the riff-raff, (meaning you !), you've all earned enough demerits that you will never gain access to the next level and the secret forums contained therein.

I'm immune though, for reasons I can't discuss here, or there, or anywhere else.......... :o

As for the riff-raff, (meaning you !), you've all earned enough demerits that you will never gain access to the next level and the secret forums contained therein.

im sure we'll get over it..... :D

in the meantime ill just have to loiter around in here i suppose :o

:D

The McCartneys

It's a very sad world we live in when Sir Paul McCartney and his wife are facing divorce and all anyone seems to want to do is make jokes about her false leg.

Personally, I think it's prosthetic.

News reports have confirmed that Paul McCartney has separated from his wife Heather Mills-McCartney.

Mrs Mills-McCartney is said to be distraught over the split. "He has been my crutch for so long"! She said in an earlier briefing, "I have no idea why this has happened, I'm stumped"

"She's running around in circles", according to a close friend, "she will need all the support she can get. It's not like its easy to walk out on a relationship like this"

It is not known whether a pre-nuptial agreement was signed prior to the marriage. Paul McCartney is one of the richest men in the world amassing a colossal wealth due to his participation with The Beatles and subsequent musical collaborations, if an agreement hasn't been signed it is believed that she won't have a leg to stand on.

Rumours abound over the split which have suggested that infidelity may have been the cause. "She's terrible" a source stated, "always trying to get her leg over".

Another source has suggested that her battle with alcoholism was the cause. "Macca couldn't handle it anymore" a friend said, "he would get home at night and find her legless"

Many have attributed this to a problem which started with the present that Paul bought her prior to the wedding. He gave her a new Prosthetic leg for Christmas but that was just a stocking-filler. The main gift was a plane but then he gave her a Lady-Shave for the other leg.

Apparently she wants to keep the plane he bought her for Christmas, she says she'll buy her own Immac for the other leg.

A poem by Sir Paul McCartney-

I lay upon a grassy bank

My hands were all a quiver

I slowly removed her suspender belt

and her leg fell in the river.

Q What had 3 legs and lived on a farm?

A The McCartneys

These jokes are funny but lets spare a thought for Paul please.

Now she has left him, he's going to struggle to find another lady that can fill Her shoe.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

:o

O.K. now all of you “Leg-Go” of this "Fred" and let me have

TLW © :D

P.S. if not then see you on Monday as my Week-end :D starts tomorrow afternoon. :D

GROAN!!!!!!!!!

Has anyone noticed how I´ve beenstaying away from this thred.

I´ll be back when the time comes to put in a word or two...

GROAN!!!!!!!!! :DSobering Tinking K.O.

Has anyone noticed how I´ve been staying away from this thred :D . NO WE HAVE NOT. :D

I´ll be back when the time comes to put in a word or two... :D

One Kan post Worse-sa-ra jokes than that, butt, willy you cume back for more :o

Kho Chai ....................................... :D ( a very understanding Is-land BTW)

TLW ©

P.S. Lots more in the ...........Seafood "Fred"...(most of the Seafood in Bread and Born in the "Bedloom")................ :D just to keep you at bay. :D

as you know... I don´t like sea food.. I wil lnot eat it sam I am, I will not eat it on a plane, I will not eat it on a train, i will not------

  • Author
as you know... I don´t like sea food.. I wil lnot eat it sam I am, I will not eat it on a plane, I will not eat it on a train, i will not------

Aren't you supposed to be on the wagon and back to work ? :o

If so, then what the hel_l are you doing posting crap like that in this fine thread ? :D

Sheesh, I post better than that, and I've been drinking to the wee hours every night for a week or so now ! :D

(just what day is it now ?) :D

25 days. this beer I´m drinking tastes pretty good.

i´m on the "control your destiny" wagon.

I´m still allowed a drink or three. I´m not allowed to get drunk, or do other naughty things.

Now as I drift through the psychoanalogitical sequencing of the here-digested phrasings and insinuations, I must be forced to conclude that i am, in fact, being slurred by KerryD.

For this, the obvious solution would be to go home and bawl my eyes out, or go to my bar and get absolutely sloshed. Any bar for that manner.

I shall do neither, and instead, dear sir, I shall hereby challenge you to a deul. A dUEl, good sir, from which only ONE of us may vanquish the other. I challenge you, to the LAST WORD.

PS. how was the golf yesterday? :o

DUEL, Kayo... spelt 'duel'! :D:o

Read it agian, then.-.... :D:D

DUEL, Kayo... spelt 'duel'! :D:o

Read it agian, then.-.... :D:D

:D of course......... :D

Oops... Forgot to edit one of the two times I used the word... MOd´s Give us back editing powers!!!!!!!!!!! >:o

Oops... Forgot to edit one of the two times I used the word... MOd´s Give us back editing powers!!!!!!!!!!! >:o

haaaa.....I see your warning level going up....soon we'll have one poster less if you don't stop calling on the MODS for your petty nity-gritties! :D

  • Author
haaaa.....I see your warning level going up....soon we'll have one poster less if you don't stop calling on the MODS for your petty nity-gritties! :D

Good ! One less poster may not make a lot of difference, but it's a start.

Kind of like the joke:

What do you call 1,000 politicians at the bottom of the ocean ?

A good start !! :D

Unfortunately, I can not engage in a DUEL with Kayo, as it is against my code to fight unarmed opponents ! :o

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