Not again..........last night a mossie got me, so I did what I usually do and applied a liberal amount of Tiger Balm to the affected area. Unfortunately I went straight back to sleep, without washing my hands. Later that night I re-arranged the Crown Jewels. And about 2 minutes later somebody applied a blow torch to my nuts. AAAAAAAGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

It must have looked quite comical seeing me with my <deleted> floating in a bowl of water.

Your quite comical anyway mate, even without your <deleted> floating in water

I must admit i have had a not too dissimilar thing happen to me, with deep heat. When i was playing rugby in the winter, i would rub any exposed parts of flesh with deep heat before the game started just to keep me warm. I did this one saturday morning, and while stood waitng for our kicker to take a penalty kick i put my hands down my shorts to keep them warm...........you can guess what happened next, needless to say i never lived that down and to this day i still have te piss taken out of me and it still brings a to my eye when i think about it

I wonder if you could take the sting out of it with some of that "cooling" talcum powder?

I wonder if you could take the sting out of it with some of that "cooling" talcum powder?

I doubt it very much I find cooling talcum powder doesnt actually cool though, it just has a very strange sensation, almost like burning. Like anything with deet, that stuff makes me burn as soon as it touches my skin

Later that night I re-arranged the Crown Jewels.

masturbation is a filthy sin , for which you were duly punished.

It must have looked quite comical seeing me with my <deleted> floating in a bowl of water.

like a bowl of soup with a couple of luuk chin plaa bobbing about.

If your vlady truely loved you she would have sucked them better

If your vlady truely loved you she would have sucked them better

Yeah with the vacuum cleaner

I wonder if you could take the sting out of it with some of that "cooling" talcum powder?

I doubt it............St Lukes Prickly Heat powder has the same as Tiger Balm in it.

Oops!...I did it again

I flamed up my balls, with a touch of the balm

Oh baby, baby

Oops!...I see them floating

2 balls in a bowl of water

I'm not eating any noodle now!

(excuse my rhyms )

Explorer

Reminds me of the "Double Super Safe Contraception Method".

Before sex, put on condom.

Smear liberally with tiger balm.

Put on another condom.

If she screams, the outer one has broken.

If you scream, the inner one has broken.

masturbation is a filthy sin , for which you were duly punished.

Hold on there Pal.........I'm a happily married man. How else am I going to get SEX

masturbation is a filthy sin , for which you were duly punished.

Hold on there Pal.........I'm a happily married man. How else am I going to get SEX

Ah, those one-in-a-bed sex romps. No-one can do it to you like you can do it to yourself.

lampard10

And that after you drew 0 – 0 ( = Crown Jewels) on Saturday and now Monday …………wohhhhhhh…. You posted your disposition. Did it really hurt you that HARD.

Me, wood have put it on after the match, must have hurt you and the boys BTW.

Yours truly,

Kan Win

Wash your hands before wanking, Lampard!

Wash your hands before wanking, Lampard!

After , is probally a good idea also .

Wash your hands before wanking, Lampard!

After , is probally a good idea also .

Before you make a cheese sandwich for your customer (Yorky?)

Oops!...I did it again

I flamed up my balls, with a touch of the balm

Oh baby, baby

Oops!...I see them floating

2 balls in a bowl of water

I'm not eating any noodle now!

(excuse my rhyms )

Explorer

I'm sure we could get a good lymeric out of this....

The once was a bar owner in Surin,

(please continue)

Oops!...I did it again

I flamed up my balls, with a touch of the balm

Oh baby, baby

Oops!...I see them floating

2 balls in a bowl of water

I'm not eating any noodle now!

(excuse my rhyms )

Explorer

I'm sure we could get a good lymeric out of this....

The once was a bar owner in Surin,

(please continue)

Who liked balls on his chin ..................

in surin a man called lampwick

was giving the bishop some stick

he just couldnt resist

one off the wrist

but forgot he had smeared it with vick *

he did his very best

the great pain to arrest

so he rubbed it with ice

ahhh jesus that feels nice

now i'll just dry it off on yorkies vest

(* vick , the uk version of tiger balm)

Now please get this right, you mob,

I didn't even have a lob,

Not to be fickle,

Thought I'd just have a tickle,

Tut.......................me and my gob.

its the majority belief

you were chasing relief

when you grabbed your thingy

and it became very stingy

but let us not dwell

on your crotchular hel_l

good barman ! a cold one please bringy

its the majority belief

you were chasing relief

when you grabbed your thingy

and it became very stingy

but let us not dwell

on your crotchular hel_l

good barman ! a cold one please bringy

I'm not a barman, you fool,

No longer pints do I pull,

I'm now the big boss,

And I don't give a toss,

If your beer is boiling....................... or cool.

But I'll tell you one thing, my son,

When this episode's over and done,

Make your way down,

To our lovely Town,

Then we'll see about having some fun.

its the majority belief

you were chasing relief

when you grabbed your thingy

and it became very stingy

but let us not dwell

on your crotchular hel_l

good barman ! a cold one please bringy

I'm not a barman, you fool,

No longer pints do I pull,

I'm now the big boss,

And I don't give a toss,

If your beer is boiling....................... or cool.

But I'll tell you one thing, my son,

When this episode's over and done,

Make your way down,

To our lovely Town,

Then we'll see about having some fun.

I do believe Mr Limpy has just propositioned Mr taxi........hmmmm, strange people in Surin methinks

with words i can be a scoffer

but with beer i'm not a quaffer

but when next in surin

i will probably pop in

and take you up on your offer.

I do believe Mr Limpy has just propositioned Mr taxi........

i doubt very much

if either of us are so butch

as to bowl from the pavilion end

kurgens aside

was nasty and snide

its merely web board banter that we send.

I do believe Mr Limpy has just propositioned Mr taxi........

i doubt very much

if either of us are so butch

as to bowl from the pavilion end

kurgens aside

was nasty and snide

its merely web board banter that we send.

The fun I did mention was BEER

Heavens above! I'm not queer,

It is not my will,

To push shit uphill,

Just wait and see, when you get here.

But if Kuegen is that way inclined,

His visit can be perfectly timed,

With a bus load of Katoeys,

Some are very nice boys,

And love it to death from behind.

i dont ever drink beer

and i'll make it quite clear,

i've no wish to pack fudge,

and from those views i wont budge ,

so if i leave hua hin

and pay a visit to surin

i'll be glad i dont to have to watch my rear.

Fair 'nough

This could well be the best TV thread ever....