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How much do you give to your Thai girlfriend/wife? What % of your income?


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Posted

Why should I be paying a woman in Thailand to be with me?

Because you're old, fat and bald, and she's young and slim?

(that's why we have to pay ours)

Post a photo of yourself, I'm sure it will reveal many reasons for you to pay her.

Or because you are young dumb and uneducated and ugly. And she is bright, beautiful and educated.

  • Like 2
Posted
For love? Or is it only about money for you?
This post must be some sort of reverse sarcasm
Not at all. I don't know why someone would only consider having a relationship with someone with their own income. Maybe I'm just a romantic.

It was a fair statement. Do most young women in Thailand marry old white man because of love or because of monthly stipend? I am sure there is love on guy's side. Thai women love their family first.

True, which is why my wife earns her own money to give to them, because I won't give them anything.

  • Like 1
Posted

I give my wife 16,000 baht per month. It is probably what a standard job in Thailand pays. So I think it's adequate to provide for food, etc.

If I had a farang wife I don't know what they'd expect in terms of finances. Do they expect money every month too? I have never had a "farang" wife so I don't know.

No farang woman I know expects to be supported by her husband- they all work.

The term for one that expects to be taken care of by a man is, IMO, a gold digger or just plain lazy. Not referring to women that stay home to raise kids.

Posted

20000 baht in Issan! That's even too much for Bangkok buddy. Your supporting your girlfriend and child which is fair and right...but paying for child no 1 and the mother in law too!?. 10,000 is more than enough to live comfortably in Issan...Is your wife paying rent?.if shes not and she wants 20k she's taking you for a ride!

This issue has been discussed multiple times since TVF started.

It is sufficient if you wish the child to live a subsistence life style like the other poor people who live that way. The child can wear low quality rags, and go without.

Yes, one can live in a nice little hovel, with an outhouse, and a sewage ditch in the front or a garbage pile on the side for around 5,000 baht per month. A basic liveable house in some of the "urban" areas starts at 10,000. Electricity and water is at least 1,000-2000 baht a month with minimal AC use. Food, and general living expenses will add 5,000 baht minimum. Then there are the school fees, the uniforms, the pocket money, the medical expenses etc.

If you think 20,000 baht is being taken for a ride then you are one cheap miserly person. I would never condemn my child to a life of poverty. If I had a kid, that child would be properly taken care of. That's what a good parent does. A young family cannot live comfortably on 10,000 baht a month. It might be sufficient for a farang pensioner living hand to mouth, or the typical impoverished Thai who dies at an early age because of the effect of poverty, but it is inadequate for anyone who wants to give his kid a fair chance at success.

  • Like 1
Posted

I give my wife 16,000 baht per month. It is probably what a standard job in Thailand pays. So I think it's adequate to provide for food, etc.

If I had a farang wife I don't know what they'd expect in terms of finances. Do they expect money every month too? I have never had a "farang" wife so I don't know.

No farang woman I know expects to be supported by her husband- they all work.

The term for one that expects to be taken care of by a man is, IMO, a gold digger or just plain lazy. Not referring to women that stay home to raise kids.

There is a child involved. Take the woman out of the picture.

Poof, she's gone.

Now, what would proper child care cost? That's 24/7. Health, housing, food, schooling etc. If you would be content to hire some country bumpkin to care for your child, then don't be surprised if the child ends up poisoned, sick or abused, and uneducated.It is the duty of the father to care for his family and his children.

Every time I read these threads, I cringe. I obviously come from a different culture and social strata than so many people in TVF. The people I grew up with, must have been aliens too. It seems to me that so many people on TVF grew up in domestic units that did not demonstrate the concept of "family", and where fathers did not take care of their families. Sad.

Posted

No woman should sit on her butt and do nothing. How much to give really depends on the situation and everyone's is different. If a guy does not want his woman working then he should give her something that would provide for her needs but not to make her rich. If she is working then give nothing. If she is a full time student then provide her enough to pay her way through school and to live on until she can work. I told my gf that I will give her everything she needs but not everything she wants. I pay all the house, food and car bills and pick up the check when going out. She is currently working and going to school full time so I give her little or no money each month. She makes good money and what she earns goes to Mom, makeup, cloths, going out with friends and savings. She may however take a year off work as her education is getting very demanding on her time. I will help her for this year, maybe 10k a month, but will push her to go back to work after she has finished her BS degree. Kids add another dimension in the relationship and the costs will increase.

I don't believe age difference should be a factor if you both truly care about each other and if it is a factor then you are not in a relationship but in a pay as you go hooker situation.

I also despise gold diggers, personal hookers who play games, users, etc etc .... Guys paying bar girls to stop working is in my opinion a huge mistake. Any relationship starting out about paying money is only setting the stage for a future of demands and problems.

When married and have children then the rules all start to change again. Basically, both people should be equally responsible for supporting the family, with money, their time spent on household chores, etc and no one should get a free ride. If you feel you are being taken advantage of you probably are.

My opinion for what it's worth.

  • Like 2
Posted

There is a child involved. Take the woman out of the picture.

Poof, she's gone.

Now, what would proper child care cost? That's 24/7. Health, housing, food, schooling etc. If you would be content to hire some country bumpkin to care for your child, then don't be surprised if the child ends up poisoned, sick or abused, and uneducated.It is the duty of the father to care for his family and his children.

Every time I read these threads, I cringe. I obviously come from a different culture and social strata than so many people in TVF. The people I grew up with, must have been aliens too. It seems to me that so many people on TVF grew up in domestic units that did not demonstrate the concept of "family", and where fathers did not take care of their families. Sad.

Health care is free, Thai government hospitals near me (CM) are really good.

Housing is free, the kid can live with me.

Schooling is free, at least from age 4 to age 11, free meals in the day too.

I don't work, child can be brought up by me, high school teacher with 10 years experience in the UK.

Mum, former country bumpkin, is now studying for a BA in Political Science at CM university.

So food?

Not all that expensive in Thailand.

Your post is fairly weird, are you helpless? do you need to hire someone to do everything in your household?

Or do you think all fathers are useless? And your wife, educated?

I don't think so, what degree does she have?

  • Like 1
Posted

I give my wife 16,000 baht per month. It is probably what a standard job in Thailand pays. So I think it's adequate to provide for food, etc.

If I had a farang wife I don't know what they'd expect in terms of finances. Do they expect money every month too? I have never had a "farang" wife so I don't know.

No farang woman I know expects to be supported by her husband- they all work.

The term for one that expects to be taken care of by a man is, IMO, a gold digger or just plain lazy. Not referring to women that stay home to raise kids.

There is a child involved. Take the woman out of the picture.

Poof, she's gone.

Now, what would proper child care cost? That's 24/7. Health, housing, food, schooling etc. If you would be content to hire some country bumpkin to care for your child, then don't be surprised if the child ends up poisoned, sick or abused, and uneducated.It is the duty of the father to care for his family and his children.

Every time I read these threads, I cringe. I obviously come from a different culture and social strata than so many people in TVF. The people I grew up with, must have been aliens too. It seems to me that so many people on TVF grew up in domestic units that did not demonstrate the concept of "family", and where fathers did not take care of their families. Sad.

Take the woman out of the picture and according to Thai culture give the child to the grandmother to raise.

Plenty of western children that are not raised by their father- I was one. With the divorce rate high as it is, even more in the future will be raised only by their mother.

Posted

There is a child involved. Take the woman out of the picture.

Poof, she's gone.

Now, what would proper child care cost? That's 24/7. Health, housing, food, schooling etc. If you would be content to hire some country bumpkin to care for your child, then don't be surprised if the child ends up poisoned, sick or abused, and uneducated.It is the duty of the father to care for his family and his children.

Every time I read these threads, I cringe. I obviously come from a different culture and social strata than so many people in TVF. The people I grew up with, must have been aliens too. It seems to me that so many people on TVF grew up in domestic units that did not demonstrate the concept of "family", and where fathers did not take care of their families. Sad.

Health care is free, Thai government hospitals near me (CM) are really good.

Housing is free, the kid can live with me.

Schooling is free, at least from age 4 to age 11, free meals in the day too.

I don't work, child can be brought up by me, high school teacher with 10 years experience in the UK.

Mum, former country bumpkin, is now studying for a BA in Political Science at CM university.

So food?

Not all that expensive in Thailand.

Your post is fairly weird, are you helpless? do you need to hire someone to do everything in your household?

Or do you think all fathers are useless? And your wife, educated?

I don't think so, what degree does she have?

Ahh, so the mother is a "former" bumpkin. She's so stupid, she allowed you to inseminate her. Were you going to save her from her Thai life, or just use her as your plaything and were shocked when you discovered that she would not submit to your capricious ways?

Some people will "shop around to find a view that validates their personal decisions and choices in life. I don't doubt that you found my post "weird". We obviously occupy a different position in the socio economic strata of life. You are content living a subsistence lifestyle. Fine. That is your choice and obviously, the best that you can do.

I am so helpless that I am financially secure, well educated and gainfully employed. I am fortunate, because my parents were the same, and so were their parents,. As each generation of my family progressed, it became more financially secure and more successful, because they mastered the golden rule of advancement: Invest in the next generation. One of the reasons why many of the Chinese immigrants to Thailand did so well was that the parents would sacrifice themselves to give their children a better chance at a good life. Hard work and responsibility were taught by example. Cultures and individuals who understand this concept tend to be successful.

People who cut corners do not help their children and instead doom them to a life of missed opportunity. It costs nothing to inspire others, but one does not inspire by trash talking a child's mother. Unless the woman is an unfit mother, the best place for a child under the age of 14 ( +/- 3) years is usually with the mother. The mother is the most important person in a child's life during that stage of development. You would have had instruction on that subject if you had formal training in early childhood education. Why would anyone want to take a young child away from the mother, especially in a maternal driven culture, solely for financial reasons, unless one was motivated solely by money or anger?

  • Like 1
Posted

Some people will "shop around to find a view that validates their personal decisions and choices in life. I don't doubt that you found my post "weird". We obviously occupy a different position in the socio economic strata of life. You are content living a subsistence lifestyle. Fine. That is your choice and obviously, the best that you can do.

Are you claiming your wife isn't an Issan farm girl who left school age 12?

(I think I've met her, but am getting a bit old and it's possible I confused your wife with another wife)

Posted

Some people will "shop around to find a view that validates their personal decisions and choices in life. I don't doubt that you found my post "weird". We obviously occupy a different position in the socio economic strata of life. You are content living a subsistence lifestyle. Fine. That is your choice and obviously, the best that you can do.

Are you claiming your wife isn't an Issan farm girl who left school age 12?

(I think I've met her, but am getting a bit old and it's possible I confused your wife with another wife)

Based on what is retained from the famous education system in Issan; she may have stayed two years too long.

;)

Posted

A loser pays. If you pay, then I don't see trust, mutual respect, and genuine feeling.

If you pay and don't have unequivocal trust in your relationship, then it's not a real relationship and you are a loser.

Posted

20000 baht in Issan! That's even too much for Bangkok buddy. Your supporting your girlfriend and child which is fair and right...but paying for child no 1 and the mother in law too!?. 10,000 is more than enough to live comfortably in Issan...Is your wife paying rent?.if shes not and she wants 20k she's taking you for a ride!

Not paying any rent, last month she said she needed 4,000 extra to pay for 2 tutors for number 1 child, this month says she has to pay for taking number 1 to hospital as he has had some behavioral problems. Last month she had to pay for our child for hospital treatment.

This month she says she has got through 9,000 in 1 week! I asked how she said 1,600 on hospital for number 1 and then has to give 3,000 towards a notebook for number 1 (says her sister will put 10,000 towards this).

I think the last few months she has got greedy, I should also add I was last in LOS in April when I gave her a one off 50,000 she was suppose to get the floor tiled in her mums house where she stays. Says this would be good for my son to stop insects etc.., coming in in rainy season.

Instead she spent it on her mothers 'farm' says this was a one off investment and her mum will put the land in her name.

The 15,000 baht is plenty to live on. the problem is the extras. When she cannot say no to her children wanting new phones,tablets,laptops. All the new things kids want. Thai mothers are ruled by their kids wants. Mothers will spend the household money are their kids and then cry they are poor and cannot take care of them,well the kid plays with his 20,000 baht laptop and talks on his 15000 baht cellphone with his 15,000 baht tablet on beside him. when he eating with his friends at KFC.

I know my stepdaughter and stepson run my wifes life. She gets 30,000 baht a month and most of it goes to the son. Our household costs are little but the kids take everything they can get. And the mother lets them.

Stand your ground 15,000 to her and tell her make it work.

  • Like 2
Posted

It was a fair statement. Do most young women in Thailand marry old white man because of love or because of monthly stipend? I am sure there is love on guy's side. Thai women love their family first.

My Thai misses is different, she only loves herself.

But wait, my former Thai gf only loved herself, and my former English wife of 30 years only loved herself.

None of them cared for their children, or their families, or for me.

Just when I was thinking mine were different, I discover they were all the same. DOH!

You can love them, but you're a fool if you trust them.

Don't you find it quite odd you are the common denominator in all these failed relationships? When was the last time you heard of a Thai girl getting rid of a really decent and caring man who was fulfilling her needs both financially and emotionally? The answer to that is probably never. Common denominator is you.

Posted

I give her 200%. We are now 792,000 baht in debt.

loan sharks at my door!!!

I have 11 jobs. Her son hasn't ever had a job. he's 28 and lives with us.

This post just cost me 12,000 baht in interest!!!!

  • Like 1
Posted

96tehtarp poster I think gave the best summary. There is no amount that will satisfy her. If you go back to your home country, you will be pressured to send money back to LOS for her mum and others. They will pressure her, to pressure you. The cost of child raising has only just begun. If as you said, she is not working, you can't think of this as just what you would give her as an allowance for odds and ends. I see people saying 20,000 baht a month is too much. but hold on, if you are supporting her, her mother and two children, that is not enough. Gosh, Thai immigration expects Falangs to need 65,000 baht a month (I quote the retirement requirements). So a family of 4 on 20,000 baht really doesn't go far for anything except poorest of poor village life

Posted

I do not give any money to my wife, just small gift sometimes. She have a part time job and I have a small business. She pays 40% of our total monthly budget, that's includes the house old mortgage and utilities, the car payment, the car insurance, the credit card payments, and a savings account for extras, travel, and unexpected expenses. No kids or family members to take care. That was our kind of "prenuptial agreement" and it is keeping money problems out the picture.

Last year an ice storm damaged the roof. No cheap to repair, and we have to get help from a small loan. This year was close to happens again.

Sometimes she works in my business for free...and that is not include in the 40%. That is priceless! I do not speak Thai. I cook..and that is not include in my 60%...That is priceless too. I am a good cook, and she loves mi chicken parmigiana.

I am American and the business is 100% mine. Anyway..it is more a hobby than a real business, but is helping few Thai people too with a good job.

The fact of living in a small town helps a lot to keep our expenses low.

  • Like 1
Posted

I don't give my GF anything per month; she has a job. I give small gifts now and then (like a dress, or a pair of shoes) and pretty nice gifts for her birthday and new year's. She pays for her own apartment. She makes the car payments 100%. I pay part of the insurance, because she drives me around a lot. Pretty much exactly the arrangement I had with Western GFs in the past.

I don't get people who pay their GF. Seems weird to me.

Posted

I don't give my GF anything per month; she has a job. I give small gifts now and then (like a dress, or a pair of shoes) and pretty nice gifts for her birthday and new year's. She pays for her own apartment. She makes the car payments 100%. I pay part of the insurance, because she drives me around a lot. Pretty much exactly the arrangement I had with Western GFs in the past.

I don't get people who pay their GF. Seems weird to me.

Did your father pay for your home, health and education? My father was like you and he skipped out and didn't pay for anything.biggrin.png

Posted

The relationship I have with my Thai wife is ideal for her (& me). After 11 years (a record), she takes what she needs & wants.

She knows what I have eg no pension.

We never fight about $$$ as she knows that if she spends to excess, we both suffer.

Fortunately, she is an only child so no requests for assistance. When we met, she had B200 & no m/c.

It is working so I ain't gonna fix it. I do know couples who are at war re $$$ 24/7 - no thanks.

Posted

so much BS on this ... ' I don't give her anything ' ... what lie's are spoken on TV ... gigglem.gif

So any farang who gives nothing expects to be looked after, taken care of ...fed, waited on, sex sometimes ! but you don't provide no financial support whatsoever ?

Absolute BS ... ain't that the truth ... whistling.gif

Posted

so much BS on this ... ' I don't give her anything ' ... what lie's are spoken on TV ... gigglem.gif

So any farang who gives nothing expects to be looked after, taken care of ...fed, waited on, sex sometimes ! but you don't provide no financial support whatsoever ?

Absolute BS ... ain't that the truth ... whistling.gif

My dad never gave my mom anything and I've never spoken to the man and never will. thumbsup.gif

  • Like 2
Posted

I think 15,000 baht is a fair amount (although 20,000 baht is now what I have been giving)

I have hard working male staff, who take care of family rent room and earns 9000 Baht in Bangkok. With 20K you live like a King in Isaan.

All these dollar amounts are OK if you don't want your family to have much of a life.

It seems like everyone's goal in life is to be as frugal as possible. Sure it's possible to live on small $$ amounts but why would you.

Everyone here on this site can't be Dutch.

Washing machine goes out, stove breaks, maintanance for car, new clothes, school supplies, eat out, gas for car and motorbikes, take the kids to the pool, take a holiday, medical expenses, good food, have a little drink sometimes and the list goes on. 10,000 baht a month is a joke.

Stop for a moment and imagine that, like most of the millions of Thai families, a daughter didn't marry a farang ATM, and ask yourself why that having married the ATM, the ATM is obliged to support all the people he didn't marry. Would the ATM support the beloved's family back home?

My wife had a child before me and we together have another child. Me the man works and makes good money. I was raised to be a man and take care of his family. I don't send my kid to a gov. school, use gov. medical services, my kid is taken to school each day in our newer truck. I'm not worried what other people do.

Posted

The man should sacrifice his life so his family has money. No matter what. Don't be weak!!! Cowboy Up!! Do the right thing!! Work all day if you have to....have you no sense of duty!!! work and work....have you no skills. Make money you lazy azz!!!! This is not your life anymore!!!!!!!

Note: i am a trust fund baby

Posted

so much BS on this ... ' I don't give her anything ' ... what lie's are spoken on TV ... gigglem.gif

So any farang who gives nothing expects to be looked after, taken care of ...fed, waited on, sex sometimes ! but you don't provide no financial support whatsoever ?

Absolute BS ... ain't that the truth ... whistling.gif

Are you talking about farangs with servants? Sounds like it.

My wife is my partner. She works, I do the housework, we take care of each other, I usually make my own meals- I don't cook for her because what she eats would make me sick, and smells revolting to me.

I didn't pay my ex back home to stay with me either, and I left her ( not for financial reasons ).

  • Like 2
  • 2 weeks later...
Posted

i'm too accustomed to the western way of life to send any income to a Thai girl. i'd only go with one for a serious relationship if they had a means of supporting themselves and were educated. i guess i'm too paranoid about being betrayed.

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