Romancing a Thai woman

[Thailimpan]

I have been dating this Thai woman for some time, less than a year. She is a professional, well educated and she speaks perfect English. We can run a good conversation and a good banter but I realize from time to time that she is an egg - white on the outside, yellow on the inside. 

 

One of the the way it shows is when I think I am romancing her, just to realize whatever I am doing is going over her head - champagne, bubble bath, fine dining and miscellaneous gifts. So, the question is what makes a Thai woman tick on the romance level? Would prefer for the Thai ladies in this forum to respond....

[daveAustin]

Same as Western, though Asian women can have a hard time displaying emotion even though they may feel good. Genuinely making them laugh, smelling and looking good, and finding that sweet-spot help. You, of course, might not be entirely compatible, or perhaps she's just dull. 

[FritsSikkink]

why don't you just ask her what she likes if you can run a good conversation

[Shot]

She would probably be happier with a big bowl of noodles and other assorted street food.

[Henryford]

Just show her your bank book - works with ALL women.

[chrisinth]

20 minutes ago, FritsSikkink said:

why don't you just ask her what she likes if you can run a good conversation

 

As Frits said, just ask her. It is a male/female relationship, treat it as one and don't try to complicate it because one of the relationship members is Thai and the other one isn't.

 

If you start doing that, and unless you are an expert on Thai culture, you will be doomed to failure in short order.......................

Edited October 13, 2016 by chrisinth

[villagefarang]

Instead of trying to impress her, why not put your ego on the back burner and really get to know her.  Listening is a good place to start.  It also helps if you have an interesting life which she might want to be a part of.

[kannot]

shes a  woman ..............who knows???????????

[pgrahmm]

One year? - Good conversation?

 

YOU - Haven't figured it out in 365 days, let's say 200+ times together?

 

Try listening to her....You have to know what she likes by now.....Go places & experience things....

 

Doesn't have to be expensive or extravagant.....Most like the little shared moments....

 

Like most (good) women....

 

Most enjoy living quietly in the moment....Instead of trying/looking at/analyzing from the outside show how much you appreciate her and the little things she does & things about her....Sometimes seems trite to us but can mean a lot to her.....When was the last time you've seen her happy?

 

Sounds like she's been pretty patient with you.....She's still around so somethings working....

[YeahSiam]

1 hour ago, Henryford said:

Just show her your bank book - works with ALL women.

 

And how did that work out for you back home?

[pgrahmm]

This is what so many men do here - in so many ways..... Without even thinking about it - or what they are doing.... Probably the leading cause of splitting up....

 

The women here are gentle, soft, easy going, & want to please.....

 

BUT - they are strong......

[sturdyd]

In my admittedly sparse experience with a variety of Thai women I've gotten the impression that romance is/was something that they either didn't understand or didn't care about. Same thing for seductiveness. It's just not on their radar. One example, where are the lingerie shops? My attempts at romance (candlelit baths and the like) that were so well-received by Western women were embarrassments with my Thai partners.

My now wife of 16 years used to come to bed wearing more clothes than she had on during the day! Okay, a little hyperbole, but not far from the truth. And even now, gifts (other than money or gold) are met with bemusement at best.

But let me add my standard disclaimer: I'm often full of sh*t and this may be one of those times.

[JingerBen]

2 hours ago, Henryford said:

Just show her your bank book - works with ALL women.

 

37 minutes ago, YeahSiam said:

 

And how did that work out for you back home?

Probably not very well.

Like so many other things, it works better here.

[pgt99]

Gold, cash, car, house, holidays, diamonds, perfume, etc. You cannot go wrong.

[4evermaat]

Maybe the "ladies in thailand" subforum might be more appropriate. The general forum....you are just begging for trolls.

That said, generally western thoughts on romance are a bit different than here. As long as she is having fun, doesnt matter how you pull it off.

[Berkshire]

"What makes a Thai woman tick on the romance level?"  I'd say mostly wit and charm.  But it would help if this was in the Thai language.  

[dbrenn]

2 hours ago, Henryford said:

Just show her your bank book - works with ALL women.

 

That works with all gold diggers and bar girls.

 

There are a lot of decent Thai women though who view a man's ability to support her as just a factor in choosing her partner. He also needs to be an interesting person, charming, fun to be with, decent and kind.

[Kwasaki]

Without a consultation    sounds to me your trying too hard. 

Good conversation you say, maybe for you, what do you see in her. ?

Lay your cards on the table and ask the right direct questions if the answers are not what you expect then you could just remain friends until you meet somebody else.   

 

 

 

Edited October 13, 2016 by Kwasaki

[piersbeckett]

The answer's Thainess and you ain't got it so you're left with the game of  'compromise solution'.

[KarenBravo]

Never met a romantic Thai woman in the 35 years I've lived here.

They are far too practical to be romantic.

[rak sa_ngop]

Get the T-shirt instead:

 

"First comes the engagement ring.

 

Then comes the wedding ring.

 

Finally comes the suffer-ring"

 

 

[nottocus]

Splash the cash and she'll be keen.

[keeniau96]

Sturdyd post is pretty much the same as my 14 year experience with a wonderful Thai woman. Loving, attentive, very attractive, careful and even frugal with money. Just about perfect in every way. But not romantic at all. 

 

Overall I would guess that the OP has a good deal going, just don't push and pay attention to her.

[RawboneFunksta]

<deleted> guys are sometimes their own worst enemy.

Basic psychology, people want the unattainable or at least that which is difficult to attain or achieve.

Be that thing.

Recently a friend told me he had met a Thai girl online and had a skype conversation with her in which he told her everything about himself and his plan to live 6 months in Thailand and six months back in Holland. In the fist long conversation he had with this girl.

 

She then ignored him for 3 weeks.

When you stop chasing them you will become more desirable. Women play this game endlessely. It's their nature.

You must be the unattainable 'thing'

Keep your counsel, play the game.

 

[geronimo]

Generally speaking, Thai women are more practical than their western counterparts, and they might not be comfortable with public demonstration of affection.

[cyberfarang]

If the lady in question shows no gratitude for the OPs gifts and gentlemanly manner, then it means she`s not the OP`s love of his life and therefore will not appreciate his offerings very much because they hold no sentiment to her.

 

Best thing the OP can do is change his strategy towards her.  Maybe she is expecting some animal passions and the brute manly approach, because many woman like those kind of guys or in other words, woe her with passion rather than gifts and don`t come a cross as too keen for her company, let her want you first.

[JAFO]

6 hours ago, villagefarang said:

Instead of trying to impress her, why not put your ego on the back burner and really get to know her.  Listening is a good place to start.  It also helps if you have an interesting life which she might want to be a part of.

 

So true VF.  Majority of women in any country look for humour, being polite, smile alot and of course dress appropriately. Thai women are no different.  And to your point having  had an interesting life that you can engage her with is a huge plus.  She will likely in return share that with you.  Of course as we all know it really boils down to the woman you met and how.

 

To the OPs question. What makes Thai women tick.....the answer is the same as all women,  just really need to know the gal you are with. All women are different. Age. Maturity. Worldly experiences. Education. Life experiences all have a bearing on it.

[YeahSiam]

4 hours ago, dbrenn said:

 

That works with all gold diggers and bar girls.

 

There are a lot of decent Thai women though who view a man's ability to support her as just a factor in choosing her partner. He also needs to be an interesting person, charming, fun to be with, decent and kind.

 

Whoosh!! (Hears the majority of the Thaivisa forum membership)

 

4 hours ago, KarenBravo said:

Never met a romantic Thai woman in the 35 years I've lived here.

They are far too practical to be romantic.

 

Maybe it's just you.

[licka]

7 hours ago, Henryford said:

Just show her your bank book - works with ALL women.

Only if they have access to its contents

[elgordo38]

5 hours ago, pgt99 said:

Gold, cash, car, house, holidays, diamonds, perfume, etc. You cannot go wrong.

The long and the short of it money and some proof that like a river it will continue to flow and like the rivers around Bangkok overflow.