Relationships and age differences, a personal case study

[GoDucks]

58 minutes ago, GoDucks said:

You are talking about vocational COLLEGES, not universities.  techniq (technical college) or asheewa (vocational college) in Thai 

This is a whittialai, a degree granting institution.  Its even called a UNIVERSITY.  its not called a colllege.

Man, its really better to know something about what you are talking about... Its not your fault that you do not know and probably not important to you, but if you are going to post, you should know what you are talking about.

 

 

[Kadilo]

1 hour ago, GoDucks said:

  

She cried when I finally bought her a 495 baht dress from H&M

So would you if you wanted 1 baht of gold. :)

[luk AJ]

361 posts I had to go through, luckily it is Sunday and my GF went off to some “hystorical” dressing event in Bangkok.

Boy, what a story.. anyway my GF and I are 17y together, she started in the night life business to pay of a debt. So quite a different story from the OP. From the many questionable stories from the OP the one with the bikini pics is telling me a lot. Although my GF knows the bar trade she would never ever post such pictures on social media.

The OP and his GF are also not living together so what kind of relationship is this. His GF never wants money or presents?! Is he living in a parallel world?

My GF would never refuse a gift, 555 that would be the day! Even if she would not like the present she would take it and give to her sister or friends. I pay for everything and that’s how I like it, she or me can step out any time. She can keep everything I ever gave her and I wouldn’t loose anything. I invested in this relationship with “cold money” so if things come to an end, it was worth every baht. The OP’s relation is strange in many ways, but whatever it is he believes it is, I see no hurting so best of luck! I guess it is one of the so many variants typical for these modern times.

 

 

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[473geo]

8 minutes ago, luk AJ said:

Although my GF knows the bar trade she would never ever post such pictures on social media

Maybe she would not, but there is a current trend for young Thai ladies to be thin and show off their slim hourglass figure (Which they work hard to achieve) the Bikini shots are not at all unusual, and often a few such photographs appear as the advertisement 'target' for girls promoting or selling slimming aids - followed by a comparison photograph of the young lady or young ladies chasing the 'target' more especially if they have made progress and are looking good - see this frequently on facebook as one of my neices (Normal working factory girl) has lost a lot of weight and is rightfully proud of her new look.

 

 

 

 

[seancbk]

5 hours ago, GoDucks said:

I get you.  But she really does not look like a ladyboy (other than tall a nd big hands and feet).  I mean, sure, its sometimes hard to tell, even for us long termers. but I doubt many people confuse her tor a transgender.

If she had big boobs, maybe hahahaha

 

Your girl has lovely slim legs, probably as a result of being tall.   I see quite a few Thai girls who have nice faces but have thighs like farm labourers and that is a huge turn off.

[luk AJ]

Maybe she would not, but there is a current trend for young Thai ladies to be thin and show off their slim hourglass figure (Which they work hard to achieve) the Bikini shots are not at all unusual, and often a few such photographs appear as the advertisement 'target' for girls promoting or selling slimming aids - followed by a comparison photograph of the young lady or young ladies chasing the 'target' more especially if they have made progress and are looking good - see this frequently on facebook as one of my neices (Normal working factory girl) has lost a lot of weight and is rightfully proud of her new look.
 
 
 
 

Thanks for the update, I didn’t know this is a trend.
As long as it does not become a form of anorexia it’s for once a good trend as too many Thai become obese.


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[473geo]

59 minutes ago, luk AJ said:

Thanks for the update, I didn’t know this is a trend.
As long as it does not become a form of anorexia it’s for once a good trend as too many Thai become obese.


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We won't derail the thread but I do let my daughter know, too thin is not good, I think she listens...maybe time will tell.

[GoDucks]

2 hours ago, luk AJ said:

Thanks for the update, I didn’t know this is a trend.
As long as it does not become a form of anorexia it’s for once a good trend as too many Thai become obese.


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Its something I worry about with my girl.  She is often OBSESSED with her weight and figure.

[NonthaburiBear]

1 hour ago, 473geo said:

We won't derail the thread but I do let my daughter know, too thin is not good, I think she listens...maybe time will tell.

really  , got the picture sir ?

[473geo]

12 minutes ago, NonthaburiBear said:

really  , got the picture sir ?

I'm very proud of my wife and family, no way I would share photos of them on a forum, very photogenic though they are

[GoDucks]

3 hours ago, luk AJ said:

361 posts I had to go through, luckily it is Sunday and my GF went off to some “hystorical” dressing event in Bangkok.

Boy, what a story.. anyway my GF and I are 17y together, she started in the night life business to pay of a debt. So quite a different story from the OP. From the many questionable stories from the OP the one with the bikini pics is telling me a lot. Although my GF knows the bar trade she would never ever post such pictures on social media.

The OP and his GF are also not living together so what kind of relationship is this. His GF never wants money or presents?! Is he living in a parallel world?

My GF would never refuse a gift, 555 that would be the day! Even if she would not like the present she would take it and give to her sister or friends. I pay for everything and that’s how I like it, she or me can step out any time. She can keep everything I ever gave her and I wouldn’t loose anything. I invested in this relationship with “cold money” so if things come to an end, it was worth every baht. The OP’s relation is strange in many ways, but whatever it is he believes it is, I see no hurting so best of luck! I guess it is one of the so many variants typical for these modern times.

 

 

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Your girl is not in her 30's if not her 40's.  Its a big difference in this generation--even from the past 3 to 5 years.

[GoDucks]

1 hour ago, 473geo said:

We won't derail the thread but I do let my daughter know, too thin is not good, I think she listens...maybe time will tell.

My daughter, who is a bit younger than my girl (they have met and get along fine) just spent 6 months in the US where everyone told her how she was too thin.  Coming back to Thailand, everyone tells her how fat she is.

[BobbyL]

I think it's time we're due another photo 

[GoDucks]

5 minutes ago, BobbyL said:

I think it's time we're due another photo 

No no I am afraid everyone will be put off by those disgusting mitts.

[BobbyL]

7 minutes ago, GoDucks said:

No no I am afraid everyone will be put off by those disgusting mitts.

Not me mate.

 

My wife is short, and I have in general preferred shorter women, but there's something very aesthetically pleasing about a tall slim Asian female. They're a rare treat. 

[theguyfromanotherforum]

Quickly before I post a pic of my flat ass

[thaibeachlovers]

On ‎3‎/‎8‎/‎2018 at 12:48 PM, GoDucks said:

Surprisingly we like a lot of the same music, enjoy the same movies, enjoy the same kind of activities, and as one of those girls who has liked Western culture for most of her life its weird how many things she is aware of--like Scoobi doo as an odd example.  I almost think her age is an advangage as she grew up being exposed to internet and all things Western.

As an example a few months back a Green Day song came up and she was singing along... A bit surprised I asked "You like Green Day?"  She said yes they were one of her favorites...

 

Few points that I consider relevant to this discussion

 

 

On ‎3‎/‎7‎/‎2018 at 10:39 PM, GoDucks said:

And she just turned 20.  When I met her she was 18

The young never know what they really want, and eventually, IMO, like Puff, the magic dragon's friend, they find new interests

 

"Painted wings and giant rings make way for other toys
One grey night it happened, Jackie Paper came no more"

 

On ‎3‎/‎7‎/‎2018 at 10:39 PM, GoDucks said:

Her skin is not white.

Never stopped Thais hitting on my wife

 

On ‎3‎/‎7‎/‎2018 at 10:39 PM, GoDucks said:

she has the body of a VS model

and that is the reason that, IMO, in the long run she'll say farewell.

IMO, she'll be constantly hit on by other guys, and in the end, either she'll follow the money, or you will get tired of the competition.

 

IMO, just enjoy it while it lasts, but keep the big boy pants handy for the day it ends.

 

Good luck.

[thaibeachlovers]

On ‎3‎/‎8‎/‎2018 at 1:12 PM, MaeJoMTB said:

Just checking ........

One poster on this forum managed to  get engaged to a bloke and didn't notice for 6 months.

 

Looks at photo ........ big hands .........

She has female hips and top of inner thighs. I can always be wrong, but IMO she's the real deal, which means the OP has to put up with horny guys hitting on her every time they go out together, and he'll always be thinking about it when she is out without him.

That's the reason I never had a DDG Thai GF. Even so, my wife was hit on all the time.

[Pilotman]

As you have posted your story, it clearly concerns you, but it shouldn't .  There is no standard relationship profile, there are no age rules, you don't need the good opinion of others.  They dont' know you  or your lady so they cannot have an opinion that counts.  The only thing that does count is how you both feel about each other  now.  Live in the moment, let the future take care of itself.  It's not written yet and stop worrying about it. 

[thaibeachlovers]

On ‎3‎/‎8‎/‎2018 at 3:18 PM, GoDucks said:

No, neither of us want kids.  I already have some, she never wants them (at least for now)

If one day she says she wants some, that would be a huge red flag, IMO.

If not using protection or had vasectomy, an "unexpected" pregnancy would be a guaranteed ATM card.

[MaeJoMTB]

8 minutes ago, thaibeachlovers said:

She has female hips and top of inner thighs. I can always be wrong, but IMO she's the real deal, which means the OP has to put up with horny guys hitting on her every time they go out together, and he'll always be thinking about it when she is out without him.

That's the reason I never had a DDG Thai GF. Even so, my wife was hit on all the time.

Skin is too dark for Thai guys to hit on her.

I had a really beautiful Thai gf (by western standards) when I first arrived, dark skin and taller than normal, almost invisible to most Thai guys, but hit on by white guys all the time. Then I met and married my wife (not all that attractive in comparison IMHO), and Thai guys followed her round everywhere we went. I couldn't believe it.

Edited March 13, 2018 by MaeJoMTB

[MaeJoMTB]

2 minutes ago, thaibeachlovers said:

If one day she says she wants some, that would be a huge red flag, IMO.

If not using protection or had vasectomy, an "unexpected" pregnancy would be a guaranteed ATM card.

Ladyboys can't have kids, so it may not be a problem.

[thaibeachlovers]

Just now, MaeJoMTB said:

Skin is too dark for Thai guys to hit on her.

I had a really beautiful Thai gf (by western standards) when I first arrived, dark skin, almost invisible to most Thai guys, but hit on by white guys all the time. Then I met and married my wife (not all that attractive in comparison IMHO), and Thai guys followed her round everywhere we went. I couldn't believe it.

As I mentioned, my wife was hit on all the time by Thai guys, and she is as dark as it gets.

[NonthaburiBear]

52 minutes ago, MaeJoMTB said:

Skin is too dark for Thai guys to hit on her.

I had a really beautiful Thai gf (by western standards) when I first arrived, dark skin and taller than normal, almost invisible to most Thai guys, but hit on by white guys all the time. Then I met and married my wife (not all that attractive in comparison IMHO), and Thai guys followed her round everywhere we went. I couldn't believe it.

How we can believe it if you don't share some photos here

seeing is believeing

[Kimber]

2 hours ago, MaeJoMTB said:

Ladyboys can't have kids, so it may not be a problem.

 

I know a middle ranking retired Brit Army officer who fell in love with a BKK Ladyboy. 

He paid for the removal of "her" tackle and transformation, then married and took her back to the UK. 

 

To this day they socialise in the upper crust circles and reportedly everyone is totally charmed by her; no-one would know where it all began.  555

 

Funny old world we live in, life really is a joke at our expense. 

[Kinnock]

The age difference in our relationship is less than the OP's, but still 'asymmetric , and we've had 8 happy years together so far - but I do have one concern about our relationship - and that's sometimes I feel I may be taking the best years of her life, and I worry about what will happen after I'm gone.  I've discussed this with her several times, and asked if she'd be better off with a younger man, but this results in tears and the silent treatment.  She says it's her decision, and that she does now want anyone else. 

 

I do think I get the lion's share of the benefits in the relationship - in addition to her 'Bollywood' looks (she's Thai but has some Indian genes in her pool), she has a very caring nature and a sparky intelligence.  She has her own businesses, but I've also helped her to invest in property to secure her future - although she sees this as investing in 'our' future, but the reality is that I will expire long before her.

[transam]

45 minutes ago, Kimber said:

 

I know a middle ranking retired Brit Army officer who fell in love with a BKK Ladyboy. 

He paid for the removal of "her" tackle and transformation, then married and took her back to the UK. 

 

To this day they socialise in the upper crust circles and reportedly everyone is totally charmed by her; no-one would know where it all began.  555

 

Funny old world we live in, life really is a joke at our expense. 

What did it cost you...?

[Kimber]

9 minutes ago, transam said:

What did it cost you...?

 

Free medical for Veterans, all I had to was present my details with her photo  555

[Berkshire]

2 hours ago, Kinnock said:

The age difference in our relationship is less than the OP's, but still 'asymmetric , and we've had 8 happy years together so far - but I do have one concern about our relationship - and that's sometimes I feel I may be taking the best years of her life, and I worry about what will happen after I'm gone.  I've discussed this with her several times, and asked if she'd be better off with a younger man, but this results in tears and the silent treatment.  She says it's her decision, and that she does now want anyone else. 

 

Why would you tell her that you're "taking the best years of her life"....?  You make it sound as if she's making a sacrifice to be with you.  I too have a GF who's much younger but I don't look at it that way.  Fact is, a spouse of any age WILL die before the other.  Or split because of divorce.  A younger man doesn't mean a better man....quite the opposite most of the time actually.

[Kinnock]

3 minutes ago, Berkshire said:

Why would you tell her that you're "taking the best years of her life"....?  You make it sound as if she's making a sacrifice to be with you.  I too have a GF who's much younger but I don't look at it that way.  Fact is, a spouse of any age WILL die before the other.  Or split because of divorce.  A younger man doesn't mean a better man....quite the opposite most of the time actually.

My TGF sees it the same way as you ........ but what I meant was that in a "traditional" relationship with an age difference of only 2-3 years, the couple would raise kids together then grow old together, eventually expiring within a few years of each other.  With a greater age difference, kids may not be part of the deal, and one partner will enter old age sooner than the other.  I'm fit and healthy now - but there will come a time when age related issues start to surface, then after I'm gone she may need to face her old age alone.

 

These are thoughts that can keep me awake at night.