An Irishman was in the waiting room, his father in with the doctor. The old man finally comes out and his son immediately starts asking what the doctor had to say. The old man says "The news is not good, I'll break it to you over a pint."
After a couple of beers, The son finally gets his father to tell him the news.

The old man says "The doctor said that I have cancer and I only have six months to live."

The son says "That's terrible news. What are we going to do?"

The old man replies, " I've lived a long and wonderful life, your mother has been a good wife and you have been a good son. I have traveled the length and breadth of the county and I have no regrets. Lets have another round and celebrate the good times."

About that time, some of the old mans friends come over, see the empty glasses and say, "Seamus, What are we celebrating?"

Seamus says, "To tell the truth, we're celebrating a bit of bad news. The doctor has told me I have aids and only six months to live."

This is quite a bombshell, so the friends offer some hasty condolences and go on their way.

The son asks," Father, you told me you had cancer, why did you tell them you have aids?"

The old man says " I don't want them bothering your mother after I'm gone."

 

34 minutes ago, roo860 said:

One could say that if he had any profits they did not come through the roof!

5 hours ago, ballpoint said:

Would it rise to the occassion a lot quicker?

3 hours ago, fangless said:

Would it rise to the occassion a lot quicker?

I don't know, but I've been on the gravity train for life.

9 minutes ago, ballpoint said:

I don't know, but I've been on the gravity train for life.

OH! Is that a pull-man train?

More red cars are stopped for speeding than any other color.

 

 

Really hope its a woman who wins it.