1 hour ago, DezLez said:

They will only get lifted if someone puts the finger on them!

Well, I'm stumped for a reply. Could you lend me a hand?

An American bloke sets off to buy a castle in Scotland. After the tour of the premise, he asks the seller if the place haunted by any ghosts...

 

Absolutely not, reassures the seller. I haven't seen a single one of them in 500 years I live here...

.

.

..

.

.

.

4 hours ago, ballpoint said:

When they do make it court, they won't have a leg to stand on.

But why not, you said they went on the limb after stealing a load of them?????

1 hour ago, ballpoint said:

Well, I'm stumped for a reply. Could you lend me a hand?

Not if it will it cost me an arm and a leg I won't!

8 minutes ago, DezLez said:

Not if it will it cost me an arm and a leg I won't!

That's it, I'm throwing in my hand.  I know when I've been de-feeted, now I'm not half the man I used to be.  And you seemed so armless at first.

5 minutes ago, ballpoint said:

That's it, I'm throwing in my hand.  I know when I've been de-feeted, now I'm not half the man I used to be.  And you seemed so armless at first.

That is just a knee-jerk reaction which will trip you up if you do not take proper steps to stay on the straight and narrow. 

I could be a helping hand and lend you some crutches if that would help get you back on your feet!

2 cops talking.....

 

I just bought a toilet brush...

 

And?

 

I don't know... I still prefer toilet paper...

13 hours ago, sanuk711 said:

.

Goodness Gracious Me!

 

 

4 hours ago, ballpoint said:

Well, I'm stumped for a reply. Could you lend me a hand?

Well, as the man with the wooden leg said, it's a matter of a pinion. ????

7 minutes ago, overherebc said:

Well, as the man with the wooden leg said, it's a matter of a pinion. ????

And he was forced to toe the line.