The feminism leaving her body when the check comes.

 

 

A man tells his doctor that he’s incapable of doing all the things around the house that he used to do.
When the examination is over, he says,
“Okay, Doctor. In plain English—what’s wrong with me?”
“Well, in plain English,” says the doctor,
“You’re just lazy.”
The man nods.
“Now give me the medical term so I can tell my wife.

A mortician was working late one night. It was his job to examine the dead bodies before they were sent off to be buried or cremated.

As he examined the body of Mr. Schwartz, who was about to be cremated, he made an amazing discovery. Mr. Schwartz had the longest private part he had ever seen!

"I'm sorry Mr. Schwartz" said the mortician, "but I can't send you off to be cremated with a tremendously huge private part like this.

It has to be saved for posterity."

With that, the mortician used his tools to remove the dead man's schlong. He stuffed his prize into a briefcase and took it home.

The first person he showed it to was his wife. "I have something to show you that you won't believe," he said, and opened up his briefcase.

"Oh my God!" she screamed. "Schwatrz is dead!"

On 4/12/2024 at 7:27 AM, ballpoint said:

 

Yes, it's real!

 

https://www.airport-data.com/aircraft/OH-WTF.html#aircraft912815

 

Well this bloke certainly can't go out in public.

I finally nabbed the person at work who has been stealing my beetroot.

Caught him red handed.

I just killed a big spider running across the floor with my slipper.

I don't care how big the spider is, no one steals my slipper.

My mate rang me last night from the pub and said.....
"I'm in the pub doing the quiz, .....whats the second biggest state in America"?
I replied...."Texas".
Two minutes later I got a message from him...saying....
"what's the second biggest state in America"?

Channel 4 are making a new soap opera set in Liverpool.
Shooting has already started...
And knifing.