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Worst Joke Ever 2026

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I was arrested yesterday on suspicion of murdering my orchestra conductor.
Apparently, because I had bought a Stradivarius in 2002, an Amati in 1998 and a Guarneri in 1990,
the police said I had a history of violins.
 

I knocked on David Banners' door earlier and told him all about global warming.

He got very angry and said he was turning green immediately.

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I've just had 40 winks on the train...
I knew I shouldn't have worn this pink t-shirt.

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I went to the pet shop to buy some breeding birds.
The cashier said, "Have you got a store card?"
I said, "No, but I did get a budgie excited once."

3 hours ago, ballpoint said:

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Salt and Vinegar..... Very tasty

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