(unfounded) allegations of domestic abuse etc - now she wants me to sign a restraining order, what to do

[SteveK]

I think most of us on here have met a Thai girl like this. A perceived slight such as this can make something snap in their mind and they go absolutely mental. Breaking into your ex's house and filming them in bed is absolutely nuts, the OP needs to grow a pair and report it to the police ASAP.

 

I don't know why they behave like this. I once had a toaster thrown at me - needless to say the next day whilst she was at work I gathered my belongings and left, got a new sim card and found a new lady within a few hours. 

[tonray]

13 minutes ago, Skallywag said:

Thai people do not sleep at night with unlocked doors and windows in my experience.

My GF always locks the bedroom door at night...cracks me up every time...as I usually wake a few hours earlier and unbolting it usually wakes her up.....but she keeps doing it....

[ezzra]

Hell hath no fury like a scorned (and mad) thai women...

[SteveK]

5 minutes ago, tonray said:

My GF always locks the bedroom door at night...cracks me up every time...as I usually wake a few hours earlier and unbolting it usually wakes her up.....but she keeps doing it....

It's so she can hear you sneaking out at night to see the 22 year old next door.

[stevenl]

1 hour ago, BritManToo said:

This is a criminal offence.

Report it to the police.

 

Stop interacting with her, block her email and phone number and any social media.

Using reasonable force to remove her from your home is entirely within Thai law.

Ignore any communications from her, do not reply.

Exactly. File a counter claim, and with that one easy to proof, she'll be the one retracting all.

[holy cow cm]

1 hour ago, OneMoreFarang said:

Also think about: What would be the motivation for the police to work on this "case"? I don't think they will have any motivation to do anything.

Perhaps physicals harm and substance abuse in her statement to the police?

Edited August 18, 2020 by holy cow cm

[holy cow cm]

Where did you meet her and what is the likelihood or chances you will see her in public again? As for signing anything = no way! As for trespassing, illegal entry and putting a video of you into the public eye, this is a crime without your consent, and is also defaming you. Way up the pros and cons of what you both have to lose and then go from there.

[NanLaew]

1 hour ago, BritManToo said:

Someone breaks into your home and if you touch them it's assault .......... total and utter BS.

If someone breaks into my bedroom it's baseball bat to the head time.

My ex-wife had a gun.

 

Apart from that, baseball bats are scarcer than hen's teeth in Isaan.

[ChouDoufu]

1 hour ago, patbkk90 said:

A weird aspect of the whole thing is is that she keeps pushing me to do this very quickly, she initially wanted to do this yesterday at 3pm, now pushes for today at 4pm.

 

one of her 'brothers' at the cop shop was busy yesterday, rescheduled.

[orchis]

stop any further contact or communication.

[OneMoreFarang]

44 minutes ago, holy cow cm said:

Perhaps physicals harm and substance abuse in her statement to the police?

If the police would follow up with everybody who supposed to take drugs and who supposed to have touched someone they would be busy 24/7. And again, why would they do that? To enforce the laws? Yeah, great idea.

[holy cow cm]

Just now, OneMoreFarang said:

If the police would follow up with everybody who supposed to take drugs and who supposed to have touched someone they would be busy 24/7. And again, why would they do that? To enforce the laws? Yeah, great idea.

Err. Because he is a walking foreign wallet?

[sirocco]

MJKT post 30,

because there is no "occasional girlfriend" section

[OneMoreFarang]

1 minute ago, holy cow cm said:

2 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

If the police would follow up with everybody who supposed to take drugs and who supposed to have touched someone they would be busy 24/7. And again, why would they do that? To enforce the laws? Yeah, great idea.

Err. Because he is a walking foreign wallet?

And that's exactly the reason why he shouldn't walk to the police. If the police want anything let them waste their time and effort. I can't imagine this little-maybe-case will be high on their priority (make money) list.

[NanLaew]

I would wager that there's no 'police report' in the first place.

 

[stouricks]

1 hour ago, Skallywag said:

Thai people do not sleep at night with unlocked doors and windows in my experience. 

Not much experience than! Maybe in the cities, but here in the jungle, no locks on anything, windows open.

[NanLaew]

1 hour ago, patbkk90 said:

The whole thing is just completely out of control, she might have some old videos of me with some alleged substance abuse, which of course I would dispute are showing anything illegal, but it just adds to the fact that I really don't want things to go any further and potentially lead to a nasty court fight which will also impact my reputation at work etc. 

"...alleged substance abuse..."

 

Yes, focus on the work reputation while you still can, ie. look for another job.

 

PS: Your TV reputation is pretty well shot all to hell already.

[NanLaew]

1 hour ago, Skallywag said:

OK, but never met a Thai lady who would sleep with a man in a house with an unlocked door or unlocked windows either.  Fence, 2 dogs or not.  Thai people do not sleep at night with unlocked doors and windows in my experience. 

There is a reason doors and windows have locks on them. 

The old adage, "an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure" comes to mind.  

Good luck and follow others advice on not signing anything

There's a fair few Thai ladies that don't plan on hanging around all night in someone else's house so don't worry too much about locks and the like. It's called a short time.

[patbkk90]

hi everyone, thanks again for the helpful replies. There is a report, she sent a (partial) picture of it to a mutual friend of ours, it clearly states my name and address. so yes I am worried about the embarassment of them showing up here, or worse, at my work, it would simply be as they say here a "massive loss of face" even though she was clearly the one who entered my premises without my consent.

 

so its clear I won't go to the police station to sign anything, it might be just an ambush of some sort. i'm not sure however, if I should a) report the incident as well (without necessarily pressing charges, I just want her to leave me alone), and b) get a lawyer (it'll just waste a lot of money that would be better spend elsewhere - but I am willing to do it, if it will help the whole thing go away quicker)? I just fear if I react at all at this point, it might just make the case gain more traction, which is not what i want - i just want her to p*ss off, to be fully honest. so its just completely insane she wants me to sign a restraining order, after she was the one breaking and entering just a few days ago.

[bkk6060]

It always amazes me how people communicate in these situations via email, or social media leaving a permanent record of their actions, apologies, etc.  Also, if you meet ask to see her phone to make sure she is not recording your conversation.  Lots of tricky people who enjoy setting up traps that in the long run could cost you $.

Edited August 18, 2020 by bkk6060

[bkk6060]

1 hour ago, SteveK said:

I don't know why they behave like this. I once had a toaster thrown at me - needless to say the next day whilst she was at work I gathered my belongings and left, got a new sim card and found a new lady within a few hours. 

Yes.  Why put up with the BS finding a new lady is very easy and so convenient here.

Surprised it took you so long.  ????

[patbkk90]

3 minutes ago, bkk6060 said:

Yes, it always amazes me how people communicate in these situations via email, or social media leaving a permanent record of their actions, apologies, etc.  Also, if you meet ask to see her phone to make sure she is not recording your conversation.  Lots of tricky people who enjoy setting up traps that in the long run could cost you $.

yes, i do apologize for bringing back a lady so shortly after she moved out, i understand it was disturbing for her to see it, even though she shouldn't have cause she shouldn't have been there in the first place. i made it clear that i reject her version of anything that took place. 

 

i'm just wondering if i should file a report now, with the danger of it making the whole thing gain traction in some way, or just ignore it, and in case I do get something official, respond with my version of the events, and file a report at this stage if necessary. 

[holy cow cm]

1 hour ago, SteveK said:

think most of us on here have met a Thai girl like this. A perceived slight such as this can make something snap in their mind and they go absolutely mental. Breaking into your ex's house and filming them in bed is absolutely nuts,

Tis an odd one. Love to hear all of the story from first meeting to the she got the boot.

[Mansell]

If you are not locked Into the area you are living.....I would move immediately and get away from this psycho bitch. It isn’t going to get better. A crazy woman cannot be reasoned with. If you cannot move, Get a lawyer and bring charges against her....she will disappear faster than a turd in the toilet.

[tomazbodner]

If you have a CCTV footage of her breaking into your home (if she had no key, she had to), I think you should make a report. It's not overly likely your new lady would act as a witness in case you don't have CCTV footage, and it's unlikely police would do much if anything about it, but at least it might make your ex reconsider what she's doing. Maybe, just maybe.

[rumak]

2 hours ago, Banana7 said:

 

As far assault on her in her home, you could say you were defending yourself

too many guys here thinking like farangs.    

 

you say , "she broke into my home and assaulted ME " .       there is no rationale here

just say the same thing over and over.    she assaulted me .  

 

don't go to a lawyer.    cheaper just to pack up and move if things progress

Edited August 18, 2020 by rumak

[VyacheslavKHV]

22 minutes ago, Mansell said:

Get a lawyer and bring charges against her....she will disappear faster than a turd in the toilet.

100% agreed

[rumak]

20 minutes ago, holy cow cm said:

Tis an odd one. Love to hear all of the story from first meeting to the she got the boot.

its been written many times.........

[Ceruhe]

Ah what a great read. Thank you for this dumpster fire of entertainment.

 

Good luck.

[rumak]

OP,  did you also start this thread :   ?

 

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