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Pattaya Was Never Stocked With Hotties, Bruv — It’s Always Been Fat Birds and Old Plonkers
Right, let’s have it straight, people bangin’ on like Pattaya’s fallen off some cliff, like it used to be Victoria’s Secret down Walking Street and now it’s just leftover Greggs pasties in lipstick. Nah, mate. Pattaya’s always been built different. First time I rocked up there, what, thirty years ago, I clocked it straight away. It weren’t full of young stunners prancin’ about, nah it was mostly plumpers and old boilers even then. Half of ‘em looked like they’d just clocked off a shift at Debenhams. Old, haggard tarts, slapper, and sluts. The young ones? They were rare, like finding a decent pint of bitter in a Bangkok Irish bar. And if you did spot one, she was already booked by some Swiss bloke with orthopedic sandals and a gut like a sack of schnitzel. And it made sense, didn’t it? The old boys, mostly Germans with ponytails, French geezers with dodgy moustaches, Brits lookin’ like they’d been left out in the rain, they weren’t after the young hot ones. Nah. They wanted the older ones, the ones with less ambition, ones who wouldn’t leg it first time they spotted some Yank flashin’ dollars about. Marriage material, they called it. Settle down, buy a shophouse, open a little cafe servin’ chips and Chang, job done. The young ones? Nah, too much admin. Always eyein’ up the next geezer with a bigger wallet and a better set of dentures. Bangkok’s where the worldies were, always has been. If you wanted the ten-out-of-tens, you got yourself to Bangers. Or maybe one of the islands if you fancied a bit of that salty-air vibe. Pattaya? Nah. Pattaya was the retirement home of the game. It’s where Bangkok’s ex-stunners went to finish their careers, yeah. So now you get these mugs moaning, “Oh the girls in Pattaya ain’t what they used to be.” Mate, what, you think it used to be full of? Instagram models? Get out of it. It was always Doris and her mates from the provinces, makin’ ends meet, lookin’ for a geezer with a bad knee and a pension. Always has been, always will be. If you want the top shelf, you don’t shop in Poundland, do ya? Pattaya’s always been Porkerland. Great fun, plenty of bargains, but don’t complain when the packaging’s a bit battered. Know what I mean, bruv? -
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Cases of Constipation and Hemorrhoids in Thailand?
Exactly, everyone needs a balanced diet, cereals , died prunes , fresh fruit after a meal as it has a lot of sugar, cut out the rice, lots of veg with the lunch ,´eat fibre foods ( brown rice, ) drink 2 L’water a day, cut out the fat, sugar and salt. -
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Report Debate Erupts Over Police Chase in Helmet Incident in Bangkok
How they do it in London. -
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Nothing much to do in regular Thailand
Sometimes I look through the online sites about what to do in Bangkok this coming week. It is often nearly all cafes and food. And then there are the regular sections about cafes and food. -
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Report Medical Council's Decision on Thaksin Hospital Case Spurs Legal Debate
Not a care in the world... wonder if he is going to compensate the scapegoat doctors
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