Making friends with Thai men.

[bob smith]

7 hours ago, 2baht said:

Are you getting the picture, Bob?

yes, and its a rather bleak one i must say. im also curious to how the average thai on the street would fair in the west. like say in germany, switzerland etc. how would they get on if they dont like conversing with foreigners? anyway, i still will not give up my quest to find a thai with a good head on his shoulders that i can shoot the sh** with over a few brandys/

[scubascuba3]

46 minutes ago, bob smith said:

were they sincere though>? thats what i struggle with. not the fact that they seem friendly on the surface, but the sincerity of their words and actions.

One bought me a coffee, that's sincere enough

[Sparktrader]

38 minutes ago, bob smith said:

hmm, maybe. but if others have the same experience, some who have been here 30 years, maybe it isnt just me eh?

I went to NK made friends with a Thai. Just talk normal. 30 years no friends must be you.

[2baht]

3 minutes ago, bob smith said:

anyway, i still will not give up my quest to find a thai with a good head on his shoulders that i can shoot the sh** with over a few brandys/

By all means do, Bob, but don't let your expectations get too high.

[bob smith]

7 hours ago, Sparktrader said:

I went to NK made friends with a Thai. Just talk normal. 30 years no friends must be you.

if you read my thread properly it was actually @2bahtthat said that. so quick to judge arent you @Sparktrader.. tut tut

[Gecko123]

22 minutes ago, Doctor Tom said:

No.  Its too big a cultural and educational gap. Even well educated Thais, in top positions in their professions, are too different, think too differently, have different outlooks and world views and live too differently.  Whatever relationship you build up will always be skin deep and superficial.  I would not even call my comments generalisations; I would call them universal truths. 

Absolutely mystified how you can make such a sweeping generalization about Thai men and at the same time think it is more than feasible to have a meaningful relationship with a Thai woman. Your statement, if true, - which it's not- would be equally applicable to Thai women.

[Sparktrader]

Lots of bitter comments. You get back what you project out. Some Thais speak good English.

 

 

[visabouncer]

1 hour ago, bob smith said:

why is it so difficult to make friends with thai men?

Have you watched "The Pacific" (miniseries) about the WW2? At the end of the WW2 the US heroes were going to return home. But they had to stay in Australia for a few days. There was a fighting between the American men and Australian ones. The reason was the Australian men did not like the foreigners to spoil their women. 
This is the main reason why the Thai men don't like you here.
A typical conversation between you and a Thai man (or a ladyboy) is always the same, no matter where - in immigration, shopping center or gasoline station. They will talk about Thai women and ask you WHY you are here. They will not ask you why you come here to spoil their women but that is what they really think when talking with you.

[bob smith]

7 hours ago, Sparktrader said:

Lots of bitter comments. You get back what you project out. Some Thais speak good English.

 

 

their english level isnt really in question. its about friendships, lasting friendships between thai men and foreigners. they seem to be rather thin on th ground.

[2baht]

4 minutes ago, Sparktrader said:

Lots of bitter comments. You get back what you project out. Some Thais speak good English.

 

 

Some farang speak good Thai too!

[bob smith]

7 hours ago, visabouncer said:

They will not ask you why you come here to spoil their women but that is what they really think when talking with you.

what do you mean by spoling their woemn exactly? you mean by marrying them, raising kids with them etc? being monogomous? thats wht i see from most farang thai couples. on the other hand i see thai men regularly cheat on their women and occaisioanlly beat them when drunk sad but true, at ;east what i have seen,

[Sparktrader]

2 minutes ago, bob smith said:

their english level isnt really in question. its about friendships, lasting friendships between thai men and foreigners. they seem to be rather thin on th ground.

People are busy. Be friendly, trade numbers. Meet up for a beer. Thats all you can do. You cant force friendships. Mainly comes via hobbies.

[Gecko123]

One poster repeated hackneyed cliche that Thai men are raised as prima donnas and another said they suffer from inferiority complexes. Neither of these statements reflect sound insight into the Thai male's psychology.

[bob smith]

7 hours ago, Gecko123 said:

Neither of these statements reflect sound insight into the Thai male's psychology.

so what is the psychology of thai males then? could you elaborate further?

[BangkokReady]

6 minutes ago, Sparktrader said:

Lots of bitter comments.

They don't sound particularly bitter.  Simply matter of fact.

 

6 minutes ago, Sparktrader said:

You get back what you project out.

And you interpret things based on what you have in your mind.

[Mavideol]

1 hour ago, bob smith said:

i do. sometimes i wish i didnt, some of the things i've heard them say about us over the years is downright disturbing!

you just answered your question  555

[BangkokReady]

The thing is, if you discount women who are in relationships with foreign men or looking for such, are the women that interested in befriending foreigners either?  Possibly Thai people simply aren't that interested in foreigners.

[Sparktrader]

1 minute ago, BangkokReady said:

They don't sound particularly bitter.  Simply matter of fact.

 

And you interpret things based on what you have in your mind.

I read whats written. I dont have a problem making friends with Thais. 

 

[Sparktrader]

Just now, BangkokReady said:

The thing is, if you discount women who are in relationships with foreign men or looking for such, are the women that interested in befriending foreigners either?  Possibly Thai people simply aren't that interested in foreigners.

According to interviews they are. Most people want to make friends. Many are shy.

 

 

[PremiumLane]

30 minutes ago, 2baht said:

Are you getting the picture, Bob?

I am getting that picture of why Thais don't want to hang out with some of you lot haha

 

What a bunch of self-righteous windbags. 

[bob smith]

7 hours ago, PremiumLane said:

What a bunch of self-righteous windbags. 

thats a bit harsh! i may be self-righteous but i'm most certainly not a windbag!

[BangkokReady]

1 minute ago, Sparktrader said:

I read whats written.

And then interpret the tone and emotion.  Possibly incorrectly.

 

1 minute ago, Sparktrader said:

I dont have a problem making friends with Thais. 

And there is no other conclusion to this (if true), other than you must be better than the OP and they must be deficient in some way?  Without really knowing anything about the OP?

[2baht]

2 minutes ago, PremiumLane said:

What a bunch of self-righteous windbags. 

Stick around, you'll get it eventually!

[PremiumLane]

Just now, 2baht said:

Stick around, you'll get it eventually!

and I rest my case....

[VinnieK]

Abandon all hope.

Haven't had any male friends here..and I tried.

I consider myself fairly sociable but to no avail.

Xenophobia and tribalism are deeply rooted here.

I never seen any Thais showing any interest in Burmese or Malaysian ppl either..and they are next door neighbours.

Insular af.

 

[Sparktrader]

1 minute ago, BangkokReady said:

And then interpret the tone and emotion.  Possibly incorrectly.

 

And there is no other conclusion to this (if true), other than you must be better than the OP and they must be deficient in some way?  Without really knowing anything about the OP?

Just effort. Take an interest in people.

[bob smith]

7 hours ago, VinnieK said:

I never seen any Thais showing any interest in Burmese or Malaysian ppl either..and they are next door neighbours.

Insular af.

is it any different in malaysia and burma tho? i mean do the local men get on with foreigners up there or is it the same old shtick? having never lived in either i am also curious

[Sparktrader]

1 hour ago, 2baht said:

Best to give them a wide birth Bob. After 30 years, I would'nt invite one of them to my home for a BBQ! I have had many aquantainances through my working life in Thailand but NO lasting friendships with any Thai males!

Did I misinterpret the tone here?

 

Wide berth. 

[bob smith]

7 hours ago, Sparktrader said:

Just effort. Take an interest in people.

i have. many times. its just they dont take any interets in us unless we are paying.

[Hummin]

Basically it difficult to make friends at all no matter where they are coming from. I do have a wide range of people I know and meet frequently based on interest and also social gatherings be it dinner, party, sports events, but I only have one male friend in Thailand who is foreigner.
 

We also frequently travel and dine with a thai couple we kind of enjoy hanging out with, but friends in the term friends? Maybe different meaning to people, I do not know.