Social life and dating in Thailand

[Hummin]

1 hour ago, Lacessit said:

Try walking into a shopping mall in the US or Australia. I could count the number of fit females on the fingers of one hand.

It's really sad when I see females still in their teens and twenties looking like beached whales.

Unless they have embraced the junk food culture of the affluent, most Thai women I have seen stay slim.

Does the female beach whales outnumber the male ones?

[spidermike007]

16 hours ago, Hummin said:

I do not know about other countries, and for sure not California, but 7 years ago, I had quite a few Norwegians attracted to me ranging from 33 up to 50 years when I was single between 44 - 47. All it takes to seem a bit interesting, but to be true, I always had easy to find women no matter where I was in the world, and we are not talking about exchange of money or even high social status work either. I have been living for sports, outdoors and engineering work offshore. Im not even in my own eyes a 7, but always fit, told good smile and easy going, and I think thats the key words. A good smile and easy going not telling everyone what they like or not like, and especially giving to much details about past. Some few future dreams always comes handy, but not to detailed, and it have to fit the womans view of future somehow where they see themselves as well. 

 

To much details is an early killer of any relationship in the early phase

 

One thing for sure, I do not miss my single days at all. 

Attitude is key. Women are attracted to a guy who is lighthearted, fun, positive and has a good sense of humor. Here, being playful is huge. Thai women love that. Even goofy. Thais love to play, and don't like someone who takes themself too seriously. They also seem to love an assertive man. Dating here is easy. Available and attractive women are plentiful and fairly easy to get with. 

[JimTripper]

5 minutes ago, spidermike007 said:

Attitude is key. Women are attracted to a guy who is lighthearted, fun, positive and has a good sense of humor. Here, being playful is huge. Thai women love that. Even goofy. Thais love to play, and don't like someone who takes themself too seriously. They also seem to love an assertive man. Dating here is easy. Available and attractive women are plentiful and fairly easy to get with. 

Sounds like one of those books we read in junior high school about how to meet women. ????

[Hummin]

19 minutes ago, JimTripper said:

Sounds like one of those books we read in junior high school about how to meet women. ????

As anything here in world, talent, passion, dedication and a touch of self awareness ????

[Lacessit]

44 minutes ago, Hummin said:

Does the female beach whales outnumber the male ones?

It depends on what part of the anatomy one looks. The males have big guts, the females bigger bums and legs.

I can't really answer the question. As a hetero male, I tend to look more at females than males.

[JimTripper]

5 hours ago, Lacessit said:

Try walking into a shopping mall in the US or Australia. I could count the number of fit females on the fingers of one hand.

It's really sad when I see females still in their teens and twenties looking like beached whales.

Unless they have embraced the junk food culture of the affluent, most Thai women I have seen stay slim.

You may just be noticing obese people in your age range as you get older. People put on weight as they age, don’t dress as well and kind of let themselves go.

 

There’s plenty of slim fit females at the shopping mall, they just seem too young as you get older and not approachable.

 

Try approaching a fit 20 something in the USA as a man in his 40+ age range and you have a cop on the way. So you end up not looking except on those rare occasions where your not watched, like going up an escalator. Leering or even glancing at body parts is a big no-no as well, people watch actively where your eyes are going.

[Seeall]

On 6/12/2023 at 7:22 PM, CharlieH said:

If your not catching any fish, change the bait or the location.

 

Stop "trying" and be you, but be more available in the social areas.

very well said, westiners think to much think they can think a solution, relationshipd and love do not fit with this..  ask the 7 eleven delivey girl out.. just because not over educated does not mean they aint smart, nobodys perfect,  great topic..

[Lacessit]

8 minutes ago, JimTripper said:

You may just be noticing obese people in your age range as you get older. People put on weight as they age, don’t dress as well and kind of let themselves go.

 

There’s plenty of slim fit females at the shopping mall, they just seem too young as you get older and not approachable.

 

Try approaching a fit 20 something in the USA as a man in his 40+ age range and you have a cop on the way. So you end up not looking except on those rare occasions where your not watched, like going up an escalator. Leering or even glancing at body parts is a big no-no as well, people watch actively where your eyes are going.

I have not let myself go.  I am normal BMI with good blood pressure and a pulse rate approaching elite athlete level for my age.

 

The number of slim fit females I see in Australia is far outweighed ( pun intended ) by the obese females. I have no intention of approaching them, simply observing.

 

Your comment on the US situation does not surprise me. Perhaps the most paranoid nation on the planet.

[Seeall]

On 6/12/2023 at 7:43 PM, TheCowboy said:

Is that code for something?

I guess he states it like that as the usa as many countries enjoying immigrants from xxxxx coutries have changed what an american looks like.. yes yes a super deep topic.. not getting into it, just a thought

[Seeall]

On 6/12/2023 at 9:58 PM, save the frogs said:

haha,

I Thai lady study MIT astrophysics.

I only look falang big brain. 

big what?

[Seeall]

On 6/12/2023 at 10:15 PM, JimTripper said:

There’s not always a “price”. There’s a thing called chemistry, mutual attraction, vibes…sometimes you can’t explain it.

nahhhh its in all womens dna.. they all want something, we all do, its just that men are more simple and as primary earners main things, like an ape, boom boom, food, and get my beer...

[Seeall]

On 6/13/2023 at 7:00 AM, Lacessit said:

IMO the OP is wasting his time looking for the type of woman he describes. They simply won't be interested in being automatically labelled as a prostitute by their fellow Thais, because they are with a farang.

 

Better for him if he sets his sights lower in terms of status and education. There are plenty of women here e.g. golf caddies, nurses who would love a relationship, and make good partners.

Nobody but myself mentions... the not so great lookers are much better in the sack...

[Hummin]

On 6/12/2023 at 6:06 PM, NextG said:

This ’price’ thing is really nonsense. 

Would you like to elaborate?

[Lacessit]

1 hour ago, Seeall said:

Nobody but myself mentions... the not so great lookers are much better in the sack...

Agree, IME the really good-looking ones are too self-absorbed.

[Hummin]

1 hour ago, Seeall said:

Nobody but myself mentions... the not so great lookers are much better in the sack...

Quite often true, they are more great full and and "hard" working. 

 

But there is good lookers to who are great in any possible way to. 

 

Just harder to please and maintain in the long run. At least my experience.

[spidermike007]

5 hours ago, JimTripper said:

Sounds like one of those books we read in junior high school about how to meet women. ????

They are simple facts. Some guys on here seem to need the refresher course. 

[Hummin]

4 minutes ago, spidermike007 said:

They are simple facts. Some guys on here seem to need the refresher course. 

True facts, it is not complicated at once you understand the basics, after that you need to practice, fail and do it again, learn by doing. 

 

Sometimes less is more, 

[glegolo18]

On 6/12/2023 at 7:05 PM, SomeFarang said:

I dated back in 2017 and had instant/unmanageable success on dating apps, seemed like every girl in the country wanted to go on dates with me. I went on at least 10 a week--most were not right for me, looking for sugar daddy, free dinners, or a 'customer'. To make the point, I am looking for a normal girl--someone who does not fall into these categories--rather a professional, educated Thai woman who does not or has never sold her body on the street and is looking for a meaningful relationship that is more than skin or wallet deep.

For most of the thaigirls to have a job, coming from a good family means that she probably is considering "sellingt out" to a falang, is like selling her body.... Her "radar" is set on thai-men or at least asian-men, not western men, with big noses and bad manners....

[Mansell]

Stop trying so hard. Some of the advice on here is really good. I have found good women without even trying. I used to walk around a lake for exercise, and a young woman was sitting there listening to music on her headphones. I stopped and said Hi, and we ended up talking for an hour. Met her again two weeks later….all of this was effortless. She has never asked me for one baht. She’s more interested in a man with a good heart. She’s in her thirties and I will be eighty next year, but look sixty three. Funniest woman I’ve ever met, and the best time in bed ever. Humour in a Thai woman is like gold in the bank. Look for that first and the rest will come. Women are easy to meet. My whole life it’s never been an issue for me. I used to get on trains in England and meet a woman and end up going to her destination. Lol.

Women are like men, but more complicated. Don’t rush things, take it slow. Ask them lots of questions about themselves….make them important and not you. Good luck.

[Hummin]

4 minutes ago, Mansell said:

Stop trying so hard. Some of the advice on here is really good. I have found good women without even trying. I used to walk around a lake for exercise, and a young woman was sitting there listening to music on her headphones. I stopped and said Hi, and we ended up talking for an hour. Met her again two weeks later….all of this was effortless. She has never asked me for one baht. She’s more interested in a man with a good heart. She’s in her thirties and I will be eighty next year, but look sixty three. Funniest woman I’ve ever met, and the best time in bed ever. Humour in a Thai woman is like gold in the bank. Look for that first and the rest will come. Women are easy to meet. My whole life it’s never been an issue for me. I used to get on trains in England and meet a woman and end up going to her destination. Lol.

Women are like men, but more complicated. Don’t rush things, take it slow. Ask them lots of questions about themselves….make them important and not you. Good luck.

Some just got it, 

 

In a relationship with her? 

 

Beach walk early morning by sun rise is always a good place to meet the more diciplined and healthy women. After a few days at the same time every morning you start reckonize the same women who come there every morning before work to have a walk, and easy to get a smile, and there you go. Patience, appearance, presence, interested and open

[glegolo18]

52 minutes ago, Mansell said:

Stop trying so hard. Some of the advice on here is really good. I have found good women without even trying. I used to walk around a lake for exercise, and a young woman was sitting there listening to music on her headphones. I stopped and said Hi, and we ended up talking for an hour. Met her again two weeks later….all of this was effortless. She has never asked me for one baht. She’s more interested in a man with a good heart. She’s in her thirties and I will be eighty next year, but look sixty three. Funniest woman I’ve ever met, and the best time in bed ever. Humour in a Thai woman is like gold in the bank. Look for that first and the rest will come. Women are easy to meet. My whole life it’s never been an issue for me. I used to get on trains in England and meet a woman and end up going to her destination. Lol.

Women are like men, but more complicated. Don’t rush things, take it slow. Ask them lots of questions about themselves….make them important and not you. Good luck.

Great advice Sir...

[JimTripper]

1 hour ago, Mansell said:

Stop trying so hard. Some of the advice on here is really good. I have found good women without even trying. I used to walk around a lake for exercise, and a young woman was sitting there listening to music on her headphones. I stopped and said Hi, and we ended up talking for an hour. Met her again two weeks later….all of this was effortless. She has never asked me for one baht. She’s more interested in a man with a good heart. She’s in her thirties and I will be eighty next year, but look sixty three. Funniest woman I’ve ever met, and the best time in bed ever. Humour in a Thai woman is like gold in the bank. Look for that first and the rest will come. Women are easy to meet. My whole life it’s never been an issue for me. I used to get on trains in England and meet a woman and end up going to her destination. Lol.

Women are like men, but more complicated. Don’t rush things, take it slow. Ask them lots of questions about themselves….make them important and not you. Good luck.

That sounds great for you but how does it help the Op? ????
 

i don’t get the feeling he wants to change himself. He sounds confident in his situation and personality, but can’t find the women he wants.

Edited June 14, 2023 by JimTripper

[NextG]

4 hours ago, Hummin said:

Would you like to elaborate?

I wrote what I meant. “Every woman comes with a price” Nonsense. “Posh woman treated as a princess” Nonsense. 
 

I met and went out with girls who had more money than me, most of the time. 
Close friends with names you would recognise. One, I met in a restaurant/bar. I thought she looked like a poor student about whom I could take care. She was with someone, but I had no idea if it were her boyfriend. So I invited to a club and happily she accepted without deferring to him. So then I told her that we would go out on a date and if it went okay then she would be my girlfriend. Really. I’m surprised even reading it now. She accepted. Then I walked her to her brand new car ???? It turned out that she wasn’t at all poor. She would come to pick me up from wherever I was, at 3am if I called. There was no princess treatment involved nor necessary. 
Another I met in a nightclub whilst wearing a totally ripped up vest. Again, no money necessary and no princess treatment involved. 
I could go on…

Not everyone starts their relationships on a financial basis. I didn’t even buy them a drink on meeting. 
In fact I even had one or two of them do some clerical work for me without expectation of payment. That’s why we have friends. We help each other; it’s not about the money. 
So to read that oft repeated nonsense about women again…

 

I’m just one person and my friends not so different. 

[Hummin]

4 minutes ago, NextG said:

I wrote what I meant. “Every woman comes with a price” Nonsense. “Posh woman treated as a princess” Nonsense. 
 

I met and went out with girls who had more money than me, most of the time. 
Close friends with names you would recognise. One, I met in a restaurant/bar. I thought she looked like a poor student about whom I could take care. She was with someone, but I had no idea if it were her boyfriend. So I invited to a club and happily she accepted without deferring to him. So then I told her that we would go out on a date and if it went okay then she would be my girlfriend. Really. I’m surprised even reading it now. She accepted. Then I walked her to her brand new car ???? It turned out that she wasn’t at all poor. She would come to pick me up from wherever I was, at 3am if I called. There was no princess treatment involved nor necessary. 
Another I met in a nightclub whilst wearing a totally ripped up vest. Again, no money necessary and no princess treatment involved. 
I could go on…

Not everyone starts their relationships on a financial basis. I didn’t even buy them a drink on meeting. 
In fact I even had one or two of them do some clerical work for me without expectation of payment. That’s why we have friends. We help each other; it’s not about the money. 
So to read that oft repeated nonsense about women again…

 

I’m just one person and my friends not so different. 

So, did you end up with all these nice rich women? 

 

Have you seen the Thai Thai dating scene lately, and how these princesses interact with their prince charming around Thailand on their small holidays? 

 

I do not say a poor man can end up with a woman of higher rank, but it is rear. We are not talking about poor, low educated, divorced, single moms, neither marked in any way,  and those who just want to play with a boy toy, we are talking about decent women, with education, with parents with expectations. 

 

 

[NextG]

13 minutes ago, Hummin said:

So, did you end up with all these nice rich women? 

 

Have you seen the Thai Thai dating scene lately, and how these princesses interact with their prince charming around Thailand on their small holidays? 

 

I do not say a poor man can end up with a woman of higher rank, but it is rear. We are not talking about poor, low educated, divorced, single moms, neither marked in any way,  and those who just want to play with a boy toy, we are talking about decent women, with education, with parents with expectations. 

 

 

Are you asking if I’m still with all of the women?????

No, I met others and moved on. I wasn’t looking to get married at that stage. These were 6+ month relationships. Some a bit longer. I wasn’t in love. 
I’ve not really delved into relationships with local girls; though there have definitely been options whilst I stayed in Bangkok. Not rich girls, but good girls. Normal girls. People who got to know me over time. 
You won’t find these people via Internet dating or clubs and pubs. 

[NORDO]

Not quite as vane about myself, however one needs to accept the fact that in the Asian culture a women priorities are:

Mum n Dad

Family

Marriage

home

Money

and then you at the bottom.

 

So if you ae seeking a "Yankish" style lass, then there are probably very few in LOFS.

 

She may say the she loves you, but only in the previous mention priority.   Marriage is a weaponize, one way contract.   If you are going to go that route, then seek a mutually legal contract that provides for entry and exit provisions.

 

I highly suggest that when you and your soon betrothed visit a preacher or village headsman for approval, you should both seek the consul of a divorce attorney as well.  Then you will have an understanding of the legal noose you are about to slip around the neck.

 

 

[Hummin]

2 minutes ago, NORDO said:

Not quite as vane about myself, however one needs to accept the fact that in the Asian culture a women priorities are:

Mum n Dad

Family

Marriage

home

Money

and then you at the bottom.

 

So if you ae seeking a "Yankish" style lass, then there are probably very few in LOFS.

 

She may say the she loves you, but only in the previous mention priority.   Marriage is a weaponize, one way contract.   If you are going to go that route, then seek a mutually legal contract that provides for entry and exit provisions.

 

I highly suggest that when you and your soon betrothed visit a preacher or village headsman for approval, you should both seek the consul of a divorce attorney as well.  Then you will have an understanding of the legal noose you are about to slip around the neck.

 

 

Well, thats another sad outlook at marriage with Asian. 

 

Im positive it is not my experience, and if so was, I had left long time ago admitted I choosed wrong partner.

 

It is what I calling victimize yourself with bad excuses for one or another reason. 

 

 

[spidermike007]

14 hours ago, JimTripper said:

That sounds great for you but how does it help the Op? ????
 

i don’t get the feeling he wants to change himself. He sounds confident in his situation and personality, but can’t find the women he wants.

No. Not confident. If a foreign man here uses only dating apps, and will not approach strangers he is attracted to, he has an issue with shyness, self esteem, or confidence. What he needs to work on, if he really wants to hook up, and it sounds like the OP desires that alot, is his confidence, so he can be  assertive, and just go for it. Everyone I know here, who makes that kind of effort has success. It is just a numbers game, at thay point.

 

It beats online dating, by a huge margin, because you see what you get, and you can immediately tell if there is any chemistry. 

[spidermike007]

19 hours ago, Lacessit said:

I have not let myself go.  I am normal BMI with good blood pressure and a pulse rate approaching elite athlete level for my age.

 

The number of slim fit females I see in Australia is far outweighed ( pun intended ) by the obese females. I have no intention of approaching them, simply observing.

 

Your comment on the US situation does not surprise me. Perhaps the most paranoid nation on the planet.

Not only paranoid, but also very fearful, heavy hearted, disillusioned, and broken. Life in the US is not much of a life, these days, especially if one is a single man over 50. My heart truly goes out to my friends back there who are single. They are having a very hard time of it. It was bad before, and then came Me Too. Now, after covid it is worse than ever. 

 

By comparison, Thailand is paradise on so many levels. I know. I travel back there alot for work, and travel all over the country. Some places are better than others, but the entire nation is very difficult. 

 

And this is a great thread. It is the thread that keeps on giving. 

Edited June 15, 2023 by spidermike007

[JimTripper]

26 minutes ago, spidermike007 said:

No. Not confident. If a foreign man here uses only dating apps, and will not approach strangers he is attracted to, he has an issue with shyness, self esteem, or confidence. What he needs to work on, if he really wants to hook up, and it sounds like the OP desires that alot, is his confidence, so he can be  assertive, and just go for it. Everyone I know here, who makes that kind of effort has success. It is just a numbers game, at thay point.

 

It beats online dating, by a huge margin, because you see what you get, and you can immediately tell if there is any chemistry. 

The op does not say he’s “only” using apps, he said he tried everything including apps, matchmakers, going out places daily, coffee shops, clubs, etc. It sounds like he is making an effort to meet people in person as well.
 

Whether he cold approaches he does not specifically say. Most guys don’t cold approach unless they are looking for hookers. They lean into it by making conversation, go where others are, eat together, etc.

 

One thing the op may benefit from is a “wingman”. A buddy or drinking partner of the same sex that makes breaking the ice a bit easier, but backs off a little once you make contact. It’s incredibly easier to talk to a group of females when there’s somebody else around to joke with etc. goes back to the having friends issue I mentioned earlier.

 

Otherwise, he’s just going stag at venues which can be done but you need much more self confidence with that approach.

Edited June 15, 2023 by JimTripper