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Do you tolerate cheating in your relationships? Is ok if your partner has an affair once?

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  • It is one of the double standards I do not understand. Quite a few men in long term relationships have posted on Thaivisa over the years about having one on the side or that they play around, but they

  • Monogamy is overrated. 

  • I think I would accept if my wife had a “gik”, as I am no longer much use in that department. I do feel that I love her, and usually just plain like her. Lately worried though because she has exp

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Monogamy is overrated. 

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3 minutes ago, Trippy said:

Monogamy is overrated. 

If a reason to have one on the side, and it goes both ways, sure, but If she came home with a surprise, or went behind my back, no mercy.

 

If I'm going to have a side kick, I will be open about it, and there would be a good reason why. 

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I think I would accept if my wife had a “gik”, as I am no longer much use in that department.

I do feel that I love her, and usually just plain like her. Lately worried though because she has expressed concern over caring for her semi-invalided “ old boy”.

1 minute ago, Hummin said:

If a reason to have one on the side, and it goes both ways, sure, but If she came home with a surprise, or went behind my back, no mercy.

 

If I'm going to have a side kick, I will be open about it, and there would be a good reason why. 

If that's your personal preference, that's cool. Everybody's different.

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14 minutes ago, Don Chance said:

 

Your wife said it was ok

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I always tell mine any babies will be DNA tested.

She can mess around if she wants, and so will I, but normally we don't (as far as I know).

Just now, Trippy said:

If that's your personal preference, that's cool. Everybody's different.

We are not there yet, and I believe every marriage have its challenges one way or the other, so why not be realistic? 

 

Have so many earlier experiences with people who I know who went in to depression after finding out their partner cheated on them. Literally in shock even they themselves had been cheating numerous of times themselves.

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1 minute ago, Hummin said:

We are not there yet, and I believe every marriage have its challenges one way or the other, so why not be realistic? 

 

Have so many earlier experiences with people who I know who went in to depression after finding out their partner cheated on them. Literally in shock even they themselves had been cheating numerous of times themselves.

It is one of the double standards I do not understand. Quite a few men in long term relationships have posted on Thaivisa over the years about having one on the side or that they play around, but they would not tolerate their missus doing the same (as it's wrong!!!!!!). Hypocritical sods.   

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Nowt wrong with tapping some variety.

The misso and I share the same live in girlfriend.

Also go out shopping by ourselves occasionally.

 

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35 minutes ago, Kwaibill said:

Lately worried though because she has expressed concern over caring for her semi-invalided “ old boy”.

red flag.

Jealousy, revenge, and greed are often motives for murder. Whether the risks are higher in Thailand I'll leave others to judge for themselves. Just something people might want to consider.

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There is cheating, and there is having (paid) sex with someone else.

 

I am pretty sure my gf never did anything with anybody else. And if she would, would I forgive her? It depends.

 

Let's see this from the other way around. While I was together with my gf, I had a couple of times sex with other girls. Did I cheat? Not really. I saw the girls in bars, I wanted to f%^$^ them, and that's what I did. And then I never saw them again. No exchange of contact details, no loving feelings. Just sex. 

I think "just sex" is not really a big deal. I love my gf and can have just sex with someone else.

If I would have a romantic dinner with another girl and kiss that girl, that would be cheating. Just sex, no cheating.

 

So much for the theory. Would I want to explain this to my gf? No.

If she would ever see another guy, I would ask her or myself: Does she love that guy? Or is it just sex.

I think just sex is not really a big problem.

 

I think the best solution is: Whatever you do, do it far away, don't get caught, and don't talk about. If there is no (visible) problem, then there is no problem to solve. 

 

1 hour ago, Gecko123 said:

Jealousy, revenge, and greed are often motives for murder. Whether the risks are higher in Thailand I'll leave others to judge for themselves. Just something people might want to consider.

Sharing is caring if you give or have access to take part!

 

 

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My b/f is 40 years younger than me. I lust after one of his friends & one of his cousins and he lusts after occasional guys he sees on the internet. We both laugh about it & we agree that we can have sex with someone else if we want to, but the other one should be there to watch.

 

Hasn't happened so far after 11 years (10 years married).

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3 hours ago, OneMoreFarang said:

There is cheating, and there is having (paid) sex with someone else.

 

I am pretty sure my gf never did anything with anybody else. And if she would, would I forgive her? It depends.

 

Let's see this from the other way around. While I was together with my gf, I had a couple of times sex with other girls. Did I cheat? Not really. I saw the girls in bars, I wanted to f%^$^ them, and that's what I did. And then I never saw them again. No exchange of contact details, no loving feelings. Just sex. 

I think "just sex" is not really a big deal. I love my gf and can have just sex with someone else.

If I would have a romantic dinner with another girl and kiss that girl, that would be cheating. Just sex, no cheating.

 

So much for the theory. Would I want to explain this to my gf? No.

If she would ever see another guy, I would ask her or myself: Does she love that guy? Or is it just sex.

I think just sex is not really a big problem.

 

I think the best solution is: Whatever you do, do it far away, don't get caught, and don't talk about. If there is no (visible) problem, then there is no problem to solve. 

 

For God's sake. Have a <deleted>.  Beat your meat. 

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3 hours ago, OneMoreFarang said:

There is cheating, and there is having (paid) sex with someone else.

 

I am pretty sure my gf never did anything with anybody else. And if she would, would I forgive her? It depends.

 

Let's see this from the other way around. While I was together with my gf, I had a couple of times sex with other girls. Did I cheat? Not really. I saw the girls in bars, I wanted to f%^$^ them, and that's what I did. And then I never saw them again. No exchange of contact details, no loving feelings. Just sex. 

I think "just sex" is not really a big deal. I love my gf and can have just sex with someone else.

If I would have a romantic dinner with another girl and kiss that girl, that would be cheating. Just sex, no cheating.

 

So much for the theory. Would I want to explain this to my gf? No.

If she would ever see another guy, I would ask her or myself: Does she love that guy? Or is it just sex.

I think just sex is not really a big problem.

 

I think the best solution is: Whatever you do, do it far away, don't get caught, and don't talk about. If there is no (visible) problem, then there is no problem to solve. 

 

So kissing and holding hands is cheating but intercourse only is not. Your gf doesnt know this.

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2 hours ago, mfd101 said:

My b/f is 40 years younger than me. I lust after one of his friends & one of his cousins and he lusts after occasional guys he sees on the internet. We both laugh about it & we agree that we can have sex with someone else if we want to, but the other one should be there to watch.

 

Hasn't happened so far after 11 years (10 years married).

That would be porn.

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Monogamy is unnatural I think.

I have always cheated.  It is just sex not love.  If my partner cheated turn about is fair game.  If we loved each other and wanted to continue together,  yes I could tolerate it.

 

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When I married my wife (we'd already discussed children) I told her if she gets pregnant I'm on the next plane out of BKK as I had a vasectomy fifteen years before we'd met.

 

I wouldn't tolerate for a second.

 

As for me... I've been faithful in the strictest sense of the word. That's all I have to say there.

1 hour ago, bignok said:

That would be porn.

Well, we're not 2 males for nothing.

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I’m not sharing with ANYONE. If I find out she’s cheating, that is the end of the relationship.

Those who tolerate a cheating spouse or girlfriend have no backbone. What’s mine is MINE!!!

1 hour ago, bkk6060 said:

Monogamy is unnatural I think.

I have always cheated.  It is just sex not love.  If my partner cheated turn about is fair game.  If we loved each other and wanted to continue together,  yes I could tolerate it.

 

Im free tomorrow

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No second chances in regard to infidelity. Cheaters are the lowest of the low and vermin, in my opinion.

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I was doing 140 Kph down the highway, when I suddenly noticed a Police car behind me with sirens blaring and lights flashing.
I continued for 3 Km until finally being forced to stop at a set of traffic lights on red.

The officer disembarked his vehicle and approached my window.

 

"Sir, didn't you hear my siren and see my lights, why didn't you pull over and stop".
"Well Sir", I replied, "About 3 weeks ago I found out my wife was having an affair with a Police officer, and she left me".

I continued, "It crossed my mind, it could have been you, and you were trying to return her".

 

He let me go.

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My first one got preggas 3 months HIV test she was positive...I thought I must have given it to her, innocent little village thing she was. Week later I tested negative. She was banging the guy accross the road while I was away. I got to know someone in the clinic and apparently rife in the area and most people don't know until its too far gone. Thai village women seem to have very little concern for contraception or safe sex. The hospital or infected person are also under no legal obligation to inform partners / spouses. She has been working in bars last 4 years. No fecks given. There is a darker side to infidellity apart from hurt feelings and probably a lot worse diseases than HIV these days which is more treatable than some. If I would have contracted it I would have had to leave Thailand. At the time the meds were around 20k a month

1 hour ago, Kenny202 said:

My first one got preggas 3 months HIV test she was positive...I thought I must have given it to her, innocent little village thing she was. Week later I tested negative. She was banging the guy accross the road while I was away. I got to know someone in the clinic and apparently rife in the area and most people don't know until its too far gone. Thai village women seem to have very little concern for contraception or safe sex. The hospital or infected person are also under no legal obligation to inform partners / spouses. She has been working in bars last 4 years. No fecks given. There is a darker side to infidellity apart from hurt feelings and probably a lot worse diseases than HIV these days which is more treatable than some. If I would have contracted it I would have had to leave Thailand. At the time the meds were around 20k a month

Hiv is rare from vagina sex.

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