Worst Joke Ever 2024

[Pouatchee]

5 hours ago, bob smith said:

if not then I will go for another stroll at exactly the same time, dressed in the same clothes, ad nauseam until they really get the message.

bob.

 

maybe its the fact you didnt shower that scared them away

[SAFETY FIRST]

5 hours ago, bob smith said:

 

i walked past them, eyeballed all of them and continued walking slowly.

 

5 hours ago, bob smith said:

engage with me in Russian but I just gave him a blank, angry stare back.

Gawd, I was trembling just reading the posting, well done. 

 

Superhero 👍

[riclag]

Whats the condo rules for

quite time, 11 -7 ?

[2baht]

Bob, I'm surprised you're a condo guy, I thought you'd be into pool villas!

[Lemsta69]

You go grrrrl!

[stoner]

hey bob how are you ? :)

[NativeBob]

Looks like early version of ChatGPT

"write me a scary story how I won over Russians with only eyeballing"

Today's GPT 3.5:

Here is a scary story for you:

Title: "The Stare Down"

In a small, remote village nestled deep within the Russian wilderness, rumors of a mysterious outsider began to spread. This stranger was said to have a chilling ability — the power to win over people with just a look in their eyes.

As the tales grew darker, the villagers became more curious and fearful. One fateful night, during the coldest winter the village had ever seen, the stranger appeared at the edge of town.

With an icy gaze that seemed to pierce through the soul, the outsider challenged the locals to a staring contest. Anyone who met his eyes was rumored to fall under his control forever.

One by one, the bravest villagers stepped forward, their hearts pounding with fear. But as soon as they locked eyes with the stranger, a sense of dread overcame them, and they succumbed to his silent power.

As the night wore on, the village fell into a trance-like state, its inhabitants helpless under the stranger's spell. But then, a young woman, known for her unwavering courage, stepped up to face the outsider.

She stared back at him, her eyes fierce and unyielding. The stranger's gaze wavered for the first time, a flicker of uncertainty crossing his face. Sensing his vulnerability, the woman intensified her stare, pouring all her strength and willpower into her eyes.

And in that moment, something remarkable happened. The outsider faltered, his powers weakening under her unwavering gaze. With a scream of frustration, he vanished into the shadows, never to be seen again.

The village was saved, and the young woman became a legend, revered for her bravery and her ability to conquer evil with nothing but the power of her eyes.

And so, the tale of how a village defeated a mysterious foe with only the strength of a single gaze was whispered throughout the land, a reminder of the enduring power of courage in the face of darkness.

I hope you find this story suitably spine-chilling and engaging! If you'd like more details or a different direction, feel free to let me know!

 

[4MyEgo]

5 hours ago, bob smith said:

We shall see tonight.

 

if not then I will go for another stroll at exactly the same time, dressed in the same clothes, ad nauseam until they really get the message.

bob.

 

 

 

Good luck Bob

[bob smith]

4 hours ago, 2baht said:

Bob, I'm surprised you're a condo guy, I thought you'd be into pool villas!

I have 3 pool villas. 

 

12 condos in total that i mostly rent out.

 

1 main house in the city,

One 7 bedroom farm house in the countryside.

 

bob.

Edited February 29 by bob smith

[2baht]

4 minutes ago, bob smith said:

I have 3 pool villas. 

 

12 condos in total that i mostly rent out.

 

1 main house in the city,

One 7 bedroom farm house in the countryside.

 

bob.

So why you complaining about noisy neighbors, you have options?

[bob smith]

Just now, 2baht said:

So why you complaining about noisy neighbors, you have options?

Because I happen to be staying in the condo that’s fully of ruskies at the moment.

 

for personal reasons.

 

yes indeed I do have options, and plenty of them

 

bob.

[still kicking]

4 hours ago, 2baht said:

Bob, I'm surprised you're a condo guy, I thought you'd be into pool villas!

Nah he hasn't got the money for that 

[still kicking]

12 minutes ago, bob smith said:

I have 3 pool villas. 

 

12 condos in total that i mostly rent out.

 

1 main house in the city,

One 7 bedroom farm house in the countryside.

 

bob.

[bob smith]

3 minutes ago, still kicking said:

Jealous?

 

dont worry, you aren’t the first and you sure as hell wont be the last!!

bob.

[Will B Good]

10 hours ago, save the frogs said:

what kind of clothes were you wearing? a motorcycle gang jacket?

are you generally an intimidating chap? 

 

Mankini should move them on.

[bbko]

10 hours ago, save the frogs said:

what kind of clothes were you wearing? a motorcycle gang jacket?

are you generally an intimidating chap? 

 

My guess is he's hoping by wearing the same clothes day after day, the smell will drive them away. 555

[Sigmund]

it's up to the managers of the developpment to take matter in hand.

 

Why not hire private security to bump the rowdy east europeans, Russians or whoever, out of the area ?

 

Rude and drunks can come from anyplace.

 

And at worse, send video footage back to some friend living abroad and ask him to name and shame the developpment all over social media. Don't do it yourself when in Thailand for obvious reasons.

[tandor]

On 2/29/2024 at 7:21 AM, bob smith said:

Yep. Already been out to 7.

 

tires seem fine,

paranoia..they've beaten you already!

[Thingamabob]

While you believe your fearsome appearance resulted in the Russians leaving, they may well have departed for other reasons. I have lived and worked with Russians at different times in my career, and I would advise caution on this issue.

[newbee2022]

On 2/29/2024 at 7:16 AM, bob smith said:

So last night, as per, the rowdy Russian mob were sat in the common area past 9pm, all drinking vodka out the bottle laughing the night away, whilst their kids were screaming their heads off. The noise was unbearable, it was distracting me from reading my book.
 

so I decided to go for a little stroll.

 

i walked past them, eyeballed all of them and continued walking slowly.

one of their group actually smiled at me and tried to engage with me in Russian but I just gave him a blank, angry stare back.

 

to my amazement by the time I got back to my room they had dispersed.

i couldn’t hear a single peep from my balcony.

usually this unruly behavior goes on till about midnight, but not tonight..

 

i gave the impression of a man who has had enough,

Stewing in silent anger and possibly about to call the authorities.

 

perhaps they got the message.

 

sometimes silence, a stern face and eye to eye contact is the best remedy here.

 

bob.

I think they are afraid of you. You chased them away with a magical stare of your eyes. Well done👍👏🙏

[Freddy42OZ]

On 2/29/2024 at 8:30 AM, EVENKEEL said:

 

What a daft thing to say.  Did he want the person to eat his balls?
 

 

[Chongalulu]

On 2/29/2024 at 7:30 AM, bob smith said:

We shall see tonight.

 

if not then I will go for another stroll at exactly the same time, dressed in the same clothes, ad nauseam until they really get the message.

bob.

 

Same clothes? Perhaps it was the lurid mankini that sent them packing? Are you hairy like a Greek?... that'll add impact 

[Toby1947]

On 2/29/2024 at 7:51 AM, bob smith said:

I don’t care.

 

I wont be intimidated by a gang of draft dodgers destroying our building,

 

I own the unit and pay my yearly maintenance fees.

I have rights. They have none.

 

and as of yet I have not engaged with them.

just making my presence felt..

 

bob.

Oh the joys of owning a worthless condo, encounting people like you who think they own the whole gaff. Rent never buy they can't give them away 🤣😂🤣

[transam]

11 minutes ago, Toby1947 said:

Oh the joys of owning a worthless condo, encounting people like you who think they own the whole gaff. Rent never buy they can't give them away 🤣😂🤣

Yeh but, you're no doubt Russian, or a posh member............😉

[bob smith]

14 minutes ago, Toby1947 said:

Oh the joys of owning a worthless condo, encounting people like you who think they own the whole gaff. Rent never buy they can't give them away 🤣😂🤣

I own 12 of them and they make me a small fortune annually. 

 

I also reserve the right to complain when I am staying at one of my pads that I pay for.

 

the Russians are just unwanted guests. 

Nothing more, nothing less.

 

bob.

 

[natway09]

You are much braver or more stupid than I am.

Good Luck, keep that attitude up you will need it

[bob smith]

2 minutes ago, natway09 said:

You are much braver or more stupid than I am.

Good Luck, keep that attitude up you will need it

You sacred of the draft dodgers mate?

[2baht]

8 minutes ago, bob smith said:

You sacred of the draft dodgers mate?

Just give them the old stink eye Bob, and shout DASVIDANIYA!

[Doctor Tom]

23 hours ago, bob smith said:

I have 3 pool villas. 

 

12 condos in total that i mostly rent out.

 

1 main house in the city,

One 7 bedroom farm house in the countryside.

 

bob.

Of course you do, which is why you don't just move. 

No, hold on, that doesn't make sense  ! 

[CANSIAM]

On your next trip to the noisy Russian packed 'common area', along with your eyeballing, utter "Slava Ukraini" and long live Navalny !!!!!