Just now, BritManToo said:

Bit optimistic, at 70 I'm thinking maybe another four years.

"Whether you think you can or can't, you are right either way"

 

Henry Ford

13 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

If you wanted a romantic relationship based on love, loyalty, care and romance, that's what you strive for. What anyone reads is an influence, just like many women who watch soap operas and think life is like that.

Unlike you I can tell the difference between reality and fantasy.

Just now, BritManToo said:

Bit optimistic, at 70 I'm thinking maybe another four years.

If I went by genetics, my dad dies at 79 after smoking 3 packs a day for 60+ years. My mom died at 84 and took good care of herself. My brother died at 67 from a heart attack brought on by diabetes. I take better care of myself than any of them, although there are no guarantees. If nothing out of the ordinary happens, I should make at least 85.

1 minute ago, fredwiggy said:

The more knowledge the better you accomplish things. And how do you know how long I , or you, will live? You can only take action as fast as life allows you to go. Some things can't be forced. especially if you want the best solution.

Their is no best solution. The clock on your life ticks daily. If you drop dead in 2 years then sitting around reading books and doing nothing has been wasted.

 

 

Just now, BritManToo said:

Unlike you I can tell the difference between reality and fantasy.

Assuming again. Again, you know NOTHING about me besides what I type here. That's your fantasy.You thinking there isn't a God is also your opinion, which is not a fact.

Just now, fredwiggy said:

Assuming again. Again, you know NOTHING about me besides what I type here. That's your fantasy.You thinking there isn't a God is also your opinion, which is not a fact.

We know a few things. You live in Isaan. You are unhappy. You read lots of books. You lift weights. You believe in god. You have never been to Chiang Mai. You are on this forum 7 days a week making lots of long posts.

 

That's not nothing.

 

Just now, Harrisfan said:

Their is no best solution. The clock on your life ticks daily. If you drop dead in 2 years then sitting around reading books and doing nothing has been wasted.

 

 

I already read those books. Now I just read here and there on the same things, along with the occasional fiction or true story, as reading, again, makes you use your brain, something that never stops, and is one way of avoiding dementia. 

7 minutes ago, Harrisfan said:

We know a few things. You live in Isaan. You are unhappy. You read lots of books. You lift weights. You believe in god. You have never been to Chiang Mai. You are on this forum 7 days a week making lots of long posts.

 

That's not nothing.

 

And has many failed relationships with narcissists ...........

On 7/8/2025 at 12:15 PM, CharlieH said:

 

Do you apply the same logic to men? If a guy has had more than 50, is he damaged? or is he a lucky git, 

 

Maybe part of it depends on what he does or did for a living, if he was in the entertainment industry like me, or sports industry and was reasonably good looking, it is more than likely he would have more than 50 unless he was in a successful marriage for most of his life I don't feel I'm damaged in any way, and have been with my Thai wife for 20 years now.

May I also point out that among all the musicians I have played with, to my knowledge there has only been one who was with the same lady, his wife, and never ever been with anyone else during his marriage.

Just now, Harrisfan said:

We know a few things. You live in Isaan. You are unhappy. You read lots of books. You lift weights. You believe in god. You have never been to Chiang Mai. You are on this forum 7 days a week making lots of long posts.

 

That's not nothing.

 

Who said I'm unhappy? I'm just unhappy living here, period. Not the same as being unhappy in general. I'm home every day, but not all day long. I go shopping, exercise, yard work, visit my girlfriend, have time with my daughter, drive around.Never been to Chiang Mai? LOL You're here every day also, making more posts than I, especially if you add your many other usernames.

1 minute ago, fredwiggy said:

Who said I'm unhappy? I'm just unhappy living here, period. Not the same as being unhappy in general. I'm home every day, but not all day long. I go shopping, exercise, yard work, visit my girlfriend, have time with my daughter, drive around.Never been to Chiang Mai? LOL You're here every day also, making more posts than I, especially if you add your many other usernames.

I make short posts. I have 1 name. You sit around complaining mostly about people not reading books. 

2 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

And has many failed relationships with narcissists ...........

Actually 2 that are narcissists. The other marriage wasn't a narcissist but someone addicted to painkillers, who died because of it. remember all of the other 90+ relationships I've had that were fulfilling but didn't go to marriage because of different plans. That isn't failing but succeeding. Having children doesn't mean that relationship failed. it means it didn't work because the parents weren't in sync. That the children are here because of it means it wasn't a failure.

Just now, fredwiggy said:

Actually 2 that are narcissists. The other marriage wasn't a narcissist but someone addicted to painkillers, who died because of it. remember all of the other 90+ relationships I've had that were fulfilling but didn't go to marriage because of different plans. That isn't failing but succeeding. Having children doesn't mean that relationship failed. it means it didn't work because the parents weren't in sync. That the children are here because of it means it wasn't a failure.

So books didnt help you identify them as narcs up front. My point exactly.

1 minute ago, Harrisfan said:

I make short posts. I have 1 name. You sit around complaining mostly about people not reading books. 

You sit here and make one line answers just to bait. Try looking back at what your reasons were to reply to myself and others, and you'll see it's just to argue, a lack of knowledge on a particular subject, or also to complain, much about people who don't like Trump. You have one name now. You do know laughing at yourself with those emojis isn't helping your right? 

Just now, fredwiggy said:

You sit here and make one line answers just to bait. Try looking back at what your reasons were to reply to myself and others, and you'll see it's just to argue, a lack of knowledge on a particular subject, or also to complain, much about people who don't like Trump. You have one name now. You do know laughing at yourself with those emojis isn't helping your right? 

I post facts Fred. Maybe those books you read were inferior to the ones I read.

1 minute ago, Harrisfan said:

So books didnt help you identify them as narcs up front. My point exactly.

No, I actually didn't know a lot about narcissists besides the malignant ones like Trump and many world leaders, celebrities and some billionaires. I learned more about the covert kind by reading about them. I'm thinking you don't realize most of the world's problems come from narcissists, which means you and many others don't see them for who they really are also.

1 minute ago, Harrisfan said:

I post facts Fred. Maybe those books you read were inferior to the ones I read.

Well, the books I've read are all on the best sellers lists for a reason. I learned from them, so that would make then not inferior. 

Just now, fredwiggy said:

No, I actually didn't know a lot about narcissists besides the malignant ones like Trump and many world leaders, celebrities and some billionaires. I learned more about the covert kind by reading about them. I'm thinking you don't realize most of the world's problems come from narcissists, which means you and many others don't see them for who they really are also.

So the books you read were fairly useless on a day to day level. My point before. 

Just now, fredwiggy said:

Well, the books I've read are all on the best sellers lists for a reason. I learned from them, so that would make then not inferior. 

They failed to teach you know to spot a narc and a bad woman. You read the wrong books.

3 minutes ago, Harrisfan said:

They failed to teach you know to spot a narc and a bad woman. You read the wrong books.

No, they taught me how to be the best partner I can be. Attraction was what hurt my choices in a couple, especially those I had children with. Most of my reading on covert narcissism came when I moved here and saw my ex being her true self.

1 hour ago, fredwiggy said:

If foreigners and locals all had the same amount of money, most Thai women would still prefer their own

 

I don't think so. If you look at Germany for instance, many German women have more money than Turkish guys, but they'll still hook up with Turkish guys because the black hair is different and more interesting to them, the other has this allure.

 

Even if Thai women had money they'd still be attracted to Farang. In fact I've dated some well off Thai girls who had their own company and they wanted a Farang, not a Thai.

16 minutes ago, Harrisfan said:

We know a few things. You live in Isaan. You are unhappy. You read lots of books. You lift weights. You believe in god. You have never been to Chiang Mai. You are on this forum 7 days a week making lots of long posts.

 

That's not nothing.

 

 To reiterate,"Again, you know NOTHING about me besides what I type here."   How is your relationship with your supposed girlfriend? If you spend as much time as you do on here, that means she is being neglected, as it isn't just in the morning but all day long. 

5 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

No, they taught me how to be the best partner I can be. Attraction was what hurt my choices in a couple, especially those I had children with. Most of my reading on covert narcissism came when I moved here and saw my ex being her true self.

Just google it

 

 

The body language signs of a narcissist can often reveal their self-centered nature and need for attention. Narcissists may use exaggerated gestures and expansive postures to assert their dominance and draw attention to themselves. They might also frequently check their reflection, seeking constant self-affirmation and validation. Additionally, narcissists may stand too close or touch others unnecessarily, disregarding personal space. They might display a constant smirk or an air of superiority, even without speaking. Somatic narcissists, in particular, may focus on their physical appearance, using poses and gestures to highlight their perceived beauty.

2 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

 To reiterate,"Again, you know NOTHING about me besides what I type here."   How is your relationship with your supposed girlfriend? If you spend as much time as you do on here, that means she is being neglected, as it isn't just in the morning but all day long. 

My mrs is sitting next to me on the bed. She's an 8. She reads Buddhism. I'm reading Tolle and Carnegie.

Just now, Cameroni said:

 

I don't think so. If you look at Germany for instance, many German women have more money than Turkish guys, but they'll still hook up with Turkish guys because the black hair is different and more interesting to them, the other has this allure.

 

Even if Thai women had money they'd still be attracted to Farang. In fact I've dated some well off Thai girls who had their own company and they wanted a Farang, not a Thai.

You're talking about a tiny fraction of a whole nationality. SOME German women like SOME Turkish guys, MOST German women are married to Germans, Polish, or other close country's people. SOME Thai women are attracted to foreigners. Most aren't. Most that end up with them do so for monetary reasons, or the promise of such. Some guys experience is but a tiny fraction of one percent of what really happens. 

1 minute ago, Harrisfan said:

Just google it

 

 

The body language signs of a narcissist can often reveal their self-centered nature and need for attention. Narcissists may use exaggerated gestures and expansive postures to assert their dominance and draw attention to themselves. They might also frequently check their reflection, seeking constant self-affirmation and validation. Additionally, narcissists may stand too close or touch others unnecessarily, disregarding personal space. They might display a constant smirk or an air of superiority, even without speaking. Somatic narcissists, in particular, may focus on their physical appearance, using poses and gestures to highlight their perceived beauty.

I don't have to google it. I've read hundreds of articles and listened to many videos from psychologists that have also written books on narcissism. Narcissists are liars, which means they love bomb people into getting involved with them, then when thy have them hooked, begin to tear them down, and take what they can and go on to another. There are many types of narcissists, and they behave differently.

3 minutes ago, Harrisfan said:

My mrs is sitting next to me on the bed. She's an 8. She reads Buddhism. I'm reading Tolle and Carnegie.

Which could mean, she's out with someone else, she's a 4, can't read, and you've never read any books at all.

Just now, fredwiggy said:

I don't have to google it. I've read hundreds of articles and listened to many videos from psychologists that have also written books on narcissism. Narcissists are liars, which means they love bomb people into getting involved with them, then when thy have them hooked, begin to tear them down, and take what they can and go on to another. There are many types of narcissists, and they behave differently.

Well 2 fooled you. You read this stuff 30 years too late. 

1 minute ago, fredwiggy said:

Which could mean, she's out with someone else, she's a 4, can't read, and you've never read any books at all.

I don't post bs like you do. You don't even have a Uni degree, can't spot 2 obvious narcs, live in a boring village yet claim to be smarter than everyone else. 

11 hours ago, scorecard said:

Well said.

 

I discssed your second paragraph with my son's Thai wife (educated, teacher, balanced, good communicator.

 

She thouht about it and then called her sister, a Thai bank manager.

 

Their conclusion; most pretties would be looking for a mid 20s to mid 30s wealthy handsome well built young Thai man, with house and car(s) and there's plenty of them. 

 

 

Yes, yes, yes, a wealthy man with a fancy house and car.

That's how the smart girls avoid having to work in bars, right? 

 

And who are you to make fun of these girls' noses? What do your noses look like? 

 

Privileged people from privileged backgrounds looking down on girls born in poor parts of the world. 

 

Fact is, we don't have any statistics, but I'm not convinced that the failure rates of these types of marriages are any higher than the standard marriage.