I just heard tonight from my 11 year old daughter an incident that happened between 2 of her class mates. 

 

Basically 2 boys were caught in the toilets performing fellatio. 

 

Aparantly when they were in the cubicle, another boy looked under the door and saw it. Reported it to the teachers.

 

Today the teachers told the students 'dont tell your parents about this'.  Typical Thailand...

 

We heard via another person that the boys have been given a warning and will not be expelled now. But if they do it again then yes off they go to another 

government school. 

 

My wife and I dont know if we should get some other parents and go to see the Director or not. Personally I think they should be taught a lesson and expelled now. 

 

Whats your opinion? Please keep on topic. 

I'm thinking seeing you have brought the subject here to this forum, you are of a mind to take the matter further. Go with your gut feeling.

Tell your daughter to always be vigilant and stay safe. Other than that, don't get involved. 

I think you and your wife should both talk to your daughter, so everyone is on the same page, and understand how to deal with different situations in life. Besides that, I would go and raise my concern with the director, can of course be good to have some more parents at the same time. However, Thai´s tend to not get involved and rather look the other way then to confront the problem. I would say my opinion and ask for a school meeting, where everyone can have a say about the matter. Such thing will also make both the boys and their parents aware of that it´s a serious problem that need to be dealt with. If they should be expelled or not, might be too hard. Maybe just experimental boys, and they kind of learn their lesson if somebody brings the problem out in the light. 

Lot of hearsay involved there.

 

Teachers telling their students not to tell their parents is them covering up a possible wrongdoing in their school, which allows others, including theirs, to continue with indecent and or illegal behavior.

 

A child should always be taught to be aware of inappropriate behavior by anyone and what to look out for and to immediately inform who's in charge, along with the parent.

 

That  11 year old's were involved with this behavior is also telling, as there could possibly be inappropriate things going on in their homes for them to learn this so young. They do see and hear about sex more these days but actually participating in it is a problem. I would definitely talk to the school supervisor and ask them why they are trying to keep this a secret. The two involved getting a warning might help, but it won't stop the behavior, especially out of the school..................https://raisingchildren.net.au/pre-teens/development/puberty-sexual-development/childhood-sexual-behaviour-10-11-years.

I was 11 years old 65 years ago & I'm sure that in the NZ of the 1950s such things did not happen.  My mother would have had no idea whatever (my 2 sisters and I were, we concluded decades later, immaculately conceived).  And my father would have been so appalled and embarrassed he would have warned me that we do not talk about such things in front of the ladies. And, as it turned out, we never talked about such things at all

 

From memory my best mate and I had - in the total absence of information from either parents or books - only just worked out - very approximately - how babies got in there in the first place, but we were still working on how & where they managed to pop out. Or perhaps it was the other way round.

On 9/11/2025 at 8:40 PM, advancebooking said:

Aparantly when they were in the cubicle, another boy looked under the door and saw it. Reported it to the teachers.

 

He was frantically tapping his foot under the divide but they didn't invite him in?

 

Boys will be boys and maybe no girls were interested.

 

This could have been addressed quietly with the three boys in the Head's office but modern society now says everything should be blurted out/shared in public. I'm surprise the voyeur didn't take a picture.

On 9/14/2025 at 11:32 AM, fredwiggy said:

Lot of hearsay involved there.

 

Teachers telling their students not to tell their parents is them covering up a possible wrongdoing in their school, which allows others, including theirs, to continue with indecent and or illegal behavior.

 

A child should always be taught to be aware of inappropriate behavior by anyone and what to look out for and to immediately inform who's in charge, along with the parent.

 

That  11 year old's were involved with this behavior is also telling, as there could possibly be inappropriate things going on in their homes for them to learn this so young. They do see and hear about sex more these days but actually participating in it is a problem. I would definitely talk to the school supervisor and ask them why they are trying to keep this a secret. The two involved getting a warning might help, but it won't stop the behavior, especially out of the school..................https://raisingchildren.net.au/pre-teens/development/puberty-sexual-development/childhood-sexual-behaviour-10-11-years.

I agree with your last paragraph. Whats going on at home or lack of supervision. These kids look at anything they want on the iphone. They all have one but not my kid. Holding off for a few more years. 

Government school!   Good your daughter inform you but don't intervene this will go bad for your daughter and I'm not this because I'm scared person or too lay back to stand up!  Just make sure you teach your daughter to keep her legs closed because these boys soon will be looking to try it live instead of jerking themselves off!

2 hours ago, thailand49 said:

Government school!   Good your daughter inform you but don't intervene this will go bad for your daughter and I'm not this because I'm scared person or too lay back to stand up!  Just make sure you teach your daughter to keep her legs closed because these boys soon will be looking to try it live instead of jerking themselves off!

 

First your daughter heard.  not nvolved thankgod

 

School has taken action that, depending on the kids involved, could have been experimentation, and being told it is bad may be enough.

 

Teacher telling kids not to tell people about it is normal in that they don't need a bunch of paranoid THAI parents screaming about it.  Or it getting into newspaper and blown out of proportion

 

As to you talking to the Director that is only going to make things worse.  The director will smile at you, say nice things, call you a paranoid farang in his mind.

 

If your actions cause any further response or penalty, then you'd better move away from where you live and get your daughter out of that school.

On 9/14/2025 at 12:00 PM, VocalNeal said:

 

He was frantically tapping his foot under the divide but they didn't invite him in?

 

Boys will be boys and maybe no girls were interested.

 

This could have been addressed quietly with the three boys in the Head's office but modern society now says everything should be blurted out/shared in public. I'm surprise the voyeur didn't take a picture.

Boys will be boys? Where did you grow up?

A farang confronting school officials may not end well for your daughter in future. Stay out of it. Just advise your daughter. 

1 hour ago, kingstonkid said:

 

First your daughter heard.  not nvolved thankgod

 

School has taken action that, depending on the kids involved, could have been experimentation, and being told it is bad may be enough.

 

Teacher telling kids not to tell people about it is normal in that they don't need a bunch of paranoid THAI parents screaming about it.  Or it getting into newspaper and blown out of proportion

 

As to you talking to the Director that is only going to make things worse.  The director will smile at you, say nice things, call you a paranoid farang in his mind.

 

If your actions cause any further response or penalty, then you'd better move away from where you live and get your daughter out of that school.

Based on your answer not sure you are coming or going. It sounds like you agree with my answer then end with something real dumb living in the dark. In the end talk big but your not the one attending the school.

If you weren't living in your own fantasy land of how thing supposed to work would know not a lot of these so call teacher or administrators in government school been taught themselves as to the right thing to do, for start you noting the teacher told students not to tell parents.

Just the fact  your daughter is the one known to have snitched retaliatory behaviour from teacher or principal for example her grades can do harm to her not you who so boldly talk behind the scene. 

 

On 9/14/2025 at 12:00 PM, VocalNeal said:

 

He was frantically tapping his foot under the divide but they didn't invite him in?

 

Boys will be boys and maybe no girls were interested.

 

This could have been addressed quietly with the three boys in the Head's office but modern society now says everything should be blurted out/shared in public. I'm surprise the voyeur didn't take a picture.

Cameras or phones are not usually allowed to be in classrooms at 11 years old here. 

I think the OP has to decide... First, the issue of the teacher warning other kids not to say anything. that in itself is a big red flag. Secondly, other replies with the assumption that the director even knows about the incident and is covering it up with the teacher. Third, the boys parents should be told as well. Since the school does not seem to want to address the problem it can be safely assumed the kids parents know nothing about the incident at all. 

The school is trying to protect itself by covering it up and telling kids to keep their mouths shut about it. This is for sure. The scandal will make a lot of waves for the school, the teacher, and the director. 

For sure you should be telling your daughter not to do what the teacher says in this respect. What if the boys push themselves on her next? Is she strong enough to push them away and fight them to prevent it? 

I have 2 daughters your kids age in school here. It was one of my biggest fears since Thai boys are well-known for aggressive sexual behavior. I have my girls learning Taekwondo for their 2nd year already so they are able to defend themselves from being forced to do something while in school. Perhaps you also should do something to ensure your daughter can defend herself as well as addressing the issue about the incident being covered up. 

 

Taught a lesson? So fellatio equals punishment, what a sad idea.

I dont think there is a school rule, saying cant have sex. Otherwise you have to explain what is sex.

Explain why you are punished, while it is not in school rules.

 

Kids need to learn as they are exploring. But expelling, other school, they keep on being punished by "society".

They are marked then, maybe for life.

Nowadays kids "learn" a lot more then in the old days. You can find all on internet.

So parents are responsible ! When you are young , you are taught by your parents, should be.

When your kid is a baby, it sticks everything in its mouth, it is parents responsibility to change it.

 It is a way of exploring what can you do.

When you were 11, you also explored things. You get caught or not and learn.

But nailing them on shame pole, for this? NO.

You know what your daughter is doing all the time? 

 

Better take care of situations of bullying and or "happy slapping" things.

I know a site, it is wide open for everybody ! The things you see there make you vomit !

It is incredible, kids can watch it. It already makes me sick to watch.

 im not looking there anymore, as i said, makes me sick. Found it by searching "funny movies".

So explored it in beginning, but absolutely not funny. Just checked, still available, didnt look on it. 

19 hours ago, thailand49 said:

Based on your answer not sure you are coming or going. It sounds like you agree with my answer then end with something real dumb living in the dark. In the end talk big but your not the one attending the school.

If you weren't living in your own fantasy land of how thing supposed to work would know not a lot of these so call teacher or administrators in government school been taught themselves as to the right thing to do, for start you noting the teacher told students not to tell parents.

Just the fact  your daughter is the one known to have snitched retaliatory behaviour from teacher or principal for example her grades can do harm to her not you who so boldly talk behind the scene. 

 

I think you misread.  My point was exactly that going to the school  will make life difficult for daughter. If you get things changed then community  will shun you and side with Thais