Worst Joke Ever

[riceyummm]

That is very sad. R. I. P. Warfie

[TomTao]

Very sad loss, condolences to his wife and family.

[riceyummm]

God....I hate that elephant!

I'm gonna miss him.

[Ron19]

Sorry to post on a sad note but I have just recieved the news from kevjohn who has had contact with the wife of " warfie " who started this thread that warfie has passed away and will be cremated today.

Rest in peace mate and sincere sympathy to his wife and family.

Ron19

.

According to his facebook page,he died in a vehicle accident on sunday the 9th of this month also on the page,there were a number posts from a son and a number of his freinds in australia.

Edited June 17, 2013 by Ron19

[kevjohn]

Sorry to post on a sad note but I have just recieved the news from kevjohn who has had contact with the wife of " warfie " who started this thread that warfie has passed away and will be cremated today.

Rest in peace mate and sincere sympathy to his wife and family.

Ron19

.

According to his facebook page,he died in a vehicle accident on sunday the 9th of this month also on the page,there were a number posts from a son and a number of his freinds in australia.

Thanks for letting warfie's friends know this sad news as I have not been able to gain internet access before now.

I would like to offer my condolences to his wife and family and may they live in the knowledge that he bought many smiles to people who followed his posts.

Rest In Peace fellow Aussie.

[Ron19]

'An extraordinarily handsome man decided he had the responsibility to marry.

The perfect woman so they could produce beautiful children beyond compare.

With that as his mission he began searching for the perfect woman.

Shortly there after he met a farmer.

Who had three stunning, gorgeous daughters that positively took his breath away_?

So he explained his mission to the farmer, asking for permission to marry one of them.

The farmer simply replied, 'They're lookin' to get married, so you came to the right place.

Look 'em over & pick the one you want.'

The man dated the first daughter.

The next day the farmer asked for the man's opinion.

'Well,' said the man, 'she's just a ‘Wheeeeee’ bit, not that you can hardly notice...pigeon-toed.'

The farmer nodded & suggested the man date one of the other girls;

So the man went out with the second daughter.

The next day, the farmer again asked how things went.

'Well,'the man replied, 'she's just a ‘Wheeeeee’ bit, not that you can hardly tell...cross-eyed.'

The farmer nodded & suggested he date the third girl to see if things might be better. So he did.

The next morning the man rushed in exclaiming;

'She's perfect, just perfect. She's the one I want to marry'

So they were wed right away. Months later the baby was born.

When the man visited the nursery he was horrified:

The baby was the ugliest, most pathetic human you can imagine.

He rushed to his father-in-law asking how such a thing could happen considering the beauty of the parents.

'Well,' explained the farmer, 'She was just a ‘Wheeeeee’ bit, not that you could hardly tell...

Pregnant when you met her_?'

[riceyummm]

Being a chickenshit wimp I was waiting for someone else to to post a joke in this thread after warfie's tragic demise. Thank you ron19.

I say "let's get this road back on the show"...........wait....what?

[riceyummm]

[riceyummm]

[riceyummm]

Breaking news!

The annual NINJA Day Parade passed through town today unnoticed by anyone.

[BB1950]

Breaking news!

The annual NINJA Day Parade passed through town today unnoticed by anyone.

At first I didn't understand until I saw this:

There are people who wait for the NINJA parade to come to town. Each time, not one NINJA is noticed by the crowd!

Edited June 27, 2013 by BB1950

[riceyummm]

And then Budda says to the hot dog vendor:

"Make me one with everything."

[scottishjohn]

And then Budda says to the hot dog vendor:

"Make me one with everything."

go easy on the karma

[riceyummm]

Tea Party Republicans

[7by7]

Why have elephants got big ears?

Noddy won't pay the ransom!

[Robby nz]

And the pink between elephants toes is..........................

Slow farang

[Robby nz]

And of course the old question of :

Why do elephants have 4 feet?

6 inches wouldn't be much use to them now would it

[riceyummm]

Ordering a Pizza in 2015

[loong]

Strange. I made a post a few days ago about a fictional Thai electronics company and it seems to have disappeared.

If a moderator has removed it then can that person please contact me to discuss why?

[riceyummm]

Strange. I made a post a few days ago about a fictional Thai electronics company and it seems to have disappeared.

If a moderator has removed it then can that person please contact me to discuss why?

I read that one and it's gone now. There was nothing objectionable in it. I think sometimes the software screws up.

[riceyummm]

[riceyummm]

Gotta be in Thailand.

[kevjohn]

The Wife and I walked past a s****y new restaurant last night.

"Did you smell that food, it smelt incredible?" she said.

Being the good Aussie bloke that I am, I thought

"Bugger it, I'll give her a treat!”

So we walked past it again!

[transam]

My wife and I were happy for twenty years, then we got married.

[billd766]

My wife and I were happy for 20 years also.

Now we are happier still.

We're divorced.

[kevjohn]

A guy walks out of a house of ill repute and sits down on a park bench, deep in thought.

“Man!” o ‘Man!” He says to himself.

“What a business!"

"You've got it."

"You sell it."

"And you've still got it!”

[kevjohn]

Why do married men gain weight while bachelors don't?

Bachelors go to the fridge see nothing they want and go to bed.

Married men go to bed see nothing they want and go to the fridge.

[riceyummm]

[riceyummm]

[kevjohn]

A golfer is cupping his hand to scoop water from a Highland burn on the St Andrews course.

A groundskeeper shouts: "Dinnae drink tha waater! Et's foo a cow $hite an pish!"

The golfer replies: "My Good fellow, I'm from England. Could you repeat that for me, in English!?"

The keeper replies: "I said, use two hands - you'll spill less that way!"