Reservations About Having A Mixed Child

[vanfan39]

Well perhaps you should match up with the all American blonde beauty queen. And by the way get a signed statement that there has never been any mixed blood in the family for at least 10 generations, and check her roots real well.

And of course we can just assume that you are a perfect specimen.

Then maybe you'll have the perfect perfect child.

But hang on is that really true, is there actually a guaratee?. Perhaps you could take out insurance just in case there's an imperfection.

Chances are that the kid you have with the American beauty queen could be totally different to you and the queen in terms of height, personality, looks, hair colour, could be born with serious health problems even with mental incapabilities.

Bottom line - there is no guarantee.

On a different perspective, you have some form of relationship with a Thai lady but you wouldn't want your children to have the same features. Have I got that right? Wow! What level of respect do you have for this woman?

Better you have a vasectomy so that you don't father any kids at all, and especially don't father kids that, on 'popping out' don't pass your phyique / appearance test. If this happens what would you do with these kids either in Thailand, or USA? Abondon them? Keep them hidden? You've made it quite clear that you wouldn't want to father them.

Your not suitable to be a father. Fathers love and nurture their children regardless of whether they are 5.7 or 5.10. or have black or blonde or any color hair.

Basically you need to grow up, and get over yourself.

well said

[dave_boo]

First things first; I'm glad y'all posted those pictures. I was worried my 16 month old daughter was overly fat--either there's an obesity epidemic going around on the luuk kruengs or I have nothing to worry about.

Secondly (to the OP), dude, what's your problem? If you are in your early 20's, I'm sure that you remember what the world was like in the mid-90's. How much has it changed since then? And furthermore, you state that having children is a distant option (like 5 years dude!<-can only assume that's what you think from your writing). So you're looking at some 20 years before this hypothetical child will be 5'1" or 5'10". What will be the prevailing mindset then (and if you can answer that, give me lotto numbers)?

As far as worrying about the 'darkness' of the kid, don't. If you can't, get a vascetomy or castration. Problem solved.

[scorecard]

Well dear OP, every post you make you reveal yourself.

It's very clearly all about YOU, YOU and more YOU.

Go back and read your own words, I hope for your own sake you can see what I'm saying to you.

You really need to find much more openness and acceptance.

- The world is full of all sorts of diversity.

- The whole human race is enhanced by all the various forms of diversity.

- The world would be a pretty boring place is there was no diversity.

And do you realize that Asians make up more than half of the worlds population?

[OxfordWill]

poor ry12.

As youve seen people get very personal about this subject.

All you are doing is voicing the already inherent drives in all of us to produce the best possible offspring and by best I mean so that they will have as many natural advantages as possible.. Nowadays in PC terms this is of course known as racism. As is breathing, eating and a few other human things. Bear in mind however, even with the perfect mother, your kid might pop out deformed. Im white and boy am I glad, if I was black Id have to worry so much more about my kid being mistreated than parents normally do. Of course its not proper to talk about these things. We're still all victorians deep down.

Edited July 4, 2009 by OxfordWill

[ronz28]

Variety is the spice of life.

Its an advantage not a detriment.

U tink too mutt.

[NovaBlue05]

Each generation from the baby boomers on has gotten progressively more shallow and "me" oriented. I can't say I'm shocked considering the OP's age.

Just keep it wrapped up until you experience a bit more of life

[ThaiBasil]

I know aspects of this topic have been covered before, but I was wondering if anyone out there has ever decided NOT to have a mixed race (thai/farang) kid for whatever reason? I'm still in my early twenties and having kids is a far-off goal, but thinking about it has seriously made me think about whether it's moral for me to keep staying in a relationship with a gf I'd never want kids with. I know this sounds trite, but one of the main things I'd worry about is that my kid would be short... I'm average height (5'10'') but with the gf, I don't think he (if) would ever be over 5'7'' If the kid has other problems, being short could seriously mess him up. Also, I'm worried he'll have jet black hair or eyes, despite the fact I've heard that half asian kids can be blonde (like their father, me). If he were to ever live in the US, I wouldn't want him characterized with Mexicans, Mediterraneans, or other Asians for his complexion- it's racist I know, but it's a reality that people discriminate in the US. So what do people think? Do are mixed kids looked on as handsome in your home countries, am I overthinking it?

All I wanna add is: if you worry about appearance, you are worrying about the wrong stuff. First you should worry if it will be a healthy kid and before even having a kid you should worry if you can handle it all and if you are able to raise a kid. Worrying about appearance is for insecure people and the low life society like you said in one of your own posts ....

And to answer your last question: yes, you are overthinking it!

PS this is my half-Thai half-Dutch son named Jonah:

[bkkjames]

I know aspects of this topic have been covered before, but I was wondering if anyone out there has ever decided NOT to have a mixed race (thai/farang) kid for whatever reason? I'm still in my early twenties and having kids is a far-off goal, but thinking about it has seriously made me think about whether it's moral for me to keep staying in a relationship with a gf I'd never want kids with. I know this sounds trite, but one of the main things I'd worry about is that my kid would be short... I'm average height (5'10'') but with the gf, I don't think he (if) would ever be over 5'7'' If the kid has other problems, being short could seriously mess him up. Also, I'm worried he'll have jet black hair or eyes, despite the fact I've heard that half asian kids can be blonde (like their father, me). If he were to ever live in the US, I wouldn't want him characterized with Mexicans, Mediterraneans, or other Asians for his complexion- it's racist I know, but it's a reality that people discriminate in the US. So what do people think? Do are mixed kids looked on as handsome in your home countries, am I overthinking it?

After reading this, i don't have a suggestion, but a request: Please don't have any children.

[DaleBlue]

Are you getting cold feet?

I am born in Russia. My dad Peruvian, my mum Malaysian. I have no problem with that, and can speak more languages that you can count. I am considering marrying a Thai, if he cares to propose (still complaining that Gold price is too high to buy a ring now).

[Mike45]

If he were to ever live in the US, I wouldn't want him characterized with Mexicans, Mediterraneans, or other Asians for his complexion- it's racist I know, but it's a reality that people discriminate in the US.

I know exactly what you mean. I have no problem with the Mexicans but those darn Mediterraneans....I'm surrounded by them here in New England. Every where I look I see Italian Americans, French Americans, Mediterranean Americans etc. Where did they all come from? This place would be so much better if it was only the original inhabitants around.....but then I wouldn't be here either. I guess you must be American Indian???

I'm likely going to have to work in a redneck northern part of the US, where basically if you have eyes darker than light brown you're looked at funny

Yup that is where I live....up here in the redneck (funny I always thought they were in the south ...what do I know?) north. I can tell you first hand that the locals all think of my wife (Thai) as being different. Employment is very tough......she has to live with the stereotype of being an .....Asian. They can tell she is one immediately upon meeting her. And what do they do.....They beg her to work for them.....for some reason these local rednecks think that Asians are hard workers....go figure

[ivowatson]

Are you getting cold feet?

I am born in Russia. My dad Peruvian, my mum Malaysian. I have no problem with that, and can speak more languages that you can count. I am considering marrying a Thai, if he cares to propose (still complaining that Gold price is too high to buy a ring now).

Reading all the posts here, it seems racism has completely dissapeared from this earth.

Even the rednecks are going soft.

Of course, the op is not ready to have children but imo he has a point.

Where I come from, I can tell you it was not so nice growing up as a kid from Asian or African descent. Kids can be very cruel. But some will say that makes them stronger. Anyway, as a parent you want to protect your child and I wouldn't enjoy explaining every day about those stupid ignorant racists.

Part of the reason I decided to stay here after our daughter was born, was because I felt Thailand would be a much better place to grow up as a kid of mixed race.

Daleblue, it seems very exciting and exotic to come from such a multicultural background but it is very hard to believe you've had a happy youth in Russia. i hope i'm wrong.

[Hunkpati]

My Great Grandfather was a Wasicu (white man) and nobody ever had a problem with him, if anything thanks to his genetics my family has no alcoholics or diabetics. I think in general Americans do not have this attitude race purity, where I'm from most people are mixed with white or Dakota so it's no big deal.

[johnnymoretti]

I know aspects of this topic have been covered before, but I was wondering if anyone out there has ever decided NOT to have a mixed race (thai/farang) kid for whatever reason? I'm still in my early twenties and having kids is a far-off goal, but thinking about it has seriously made me think about whether it's moral for me to keep staying in a relationship with a gf I'd never want kids with. I know this sounds trite, but one of the main things I'd worry about is that my kid would be short... I'm average height (5'10'') but with the gf, I don't think he (if) would ever be over 5'7'' If the kid has other problems, being short could seriously mess him up. Also, I'm worried he'll have jet black hair or eyes, despite the fact I've heard that half asian kids can be blonde (like their father, me). If he were to ever live in the US, I wouldn't want him characterized with Mexicans, Mediterraneans, or other Asians for his complexion- it's racist I know, but it's a reality that people discriminate in the US. So what do people think? Do are mixed kids looked on as handsome in your home countries, am I overthinking it?

Is this a joke post?? Or what??? It not, then its clear you are NOT ready to have children. Wait until you mature some.

[cdnvic]

The OP is correct he should not have children. He's a perfect example of someone who shouldn't reproduce.

[scorecard]

The OP is correct he should not have children. He's a perfect example of someone who shouldn't reproduce.

Quote from the original post:

".........I don't think he (if) would ever be over 5'7'' If the kid has other problems, being short could seriously mess him up. Also, I'm worried he'll have jet black hair or eyes, despite the fact I've heard that half asian kids can be blonde (like their father, me). If he were to ever live in the US, I wouldn't want him characterized with Mexicans....."

So, looks like it's gotta be a he.

so, looks like black hair is a no go.

(But of course it's ok for the current throw away gf to have black hair, and I hope she wises up to the posters' attitudes to life in the very near future.)

I notice the original poster has gone quiet. Hope he's doing some very serious thinking!

[johnnymoretti]

The OP is correct he should not have children. He's a perfect example of someone who shouldn't reproduce.

I notice the original poster has gone quiet. Hope he's doing some very serious thinking!

We can only hope he's returned to his native planet.

[doggie888888]

Do we need anymore proof that not only primates and animals choose their mates carefully to ensure "desirable" traits can be passed down to the next generation. To the OP, if you are human, theoretically you'd choose "intelligence" as the trait to pass down to your kids: not hair/eye color because you reduce yourself to a bird choosing feather marking and colouring

[dmax]

I know aspects of this topic have been covered before, but I was wondering if anyone out there has ever decided NOT to have a mixed race (thai/farang) kid for whatever reason? I'm still in my early twenties and having kids is a far-off goal, but thinking about it has seriously made me think about whether it's moral for me to keep staying in a relationship with a gf I'd never want kids with. I know this sounds trite, but one of the main things I'd worry about is that my kid would be short... I'm average height (5'10'') but with the gf, I don't think he (if) would ever be over 5'7'' If the kid has other problems, being short could seriously mess him up. Also, I'm worried he'll have jet black hair or eyes, despite the fact I've heard that half asian kids can be blonde (like their father, me). If he were to ever live in the US, I wouldn't want him characterized with Mexicans, Mediterraneans, or other Asians for his complexion- it's racist I know, but it's a reality that people discriminate in the US. So what do people think? Do are mixed kids looked on as handsome in your home countries, am I overthinking it?

what a stupid bloody post,,,my wifes just after having a beautifull baby girl ,,she now 3 mths old and absolutely nothing wotsoever wrong with her,,,whats behind ur thinking????

[scorecard]

I know aspects of this topic have been covered before, but I was wondering if anyone out there has ever decided NOT to have a mixed race (thai/farang) kid for whatever reason? I'm still in my early twenties and having kids is a far-off goal, but thinking about it has seriously made me think about whether it's moral for me to keep staying in a relationship with a gf I'd never want kids with. I know this sounds trite, but one of the main things I'd worry about is that my kid would be short... I'm average height (5'10'') but with the gf, I don't think he (if) would ever be over 5'7'' If the kid has other problems, being short could seriously mess him up. Also, I'm worried he'll have jet black hair or eyes, despite the fact I've heard that half asian kids can be blonde (like their father, me). If he were to ever live in the US, I wouldn't want him characterized with Mexicans, Mediterraneans, or other Asians for his complexion- it's racist I know, but it's a reality that people discriminate in the US. So what do people think? Do are mixed kids looked on as handsome in your home countries, am I overthinking it?

what a stupid bloody post,,,my wifes just after having a beautifull baby girl ,,she now 3 mths old and absolutely nothing wotsoever wrong with her,,,whats behind ur thinking????

Message to the original poster:

I guess by now you realize that you've fired up quite a lot of people, me included.

There's a common base why all the posters are riled up but of course all of the posters will also have their own slant.

I want to share with you why I'm riled up by your post. The thing that way above anything else in life gets me angry is people who mother or father children and then don't take care of them and this is regardless of what they look like.

I have given my Thai born son as much love as I could find all of his life, and it happened automatically, and to some extent because I unconsciously repeated the experience I luckily had as a child. His welfare, his development, his education has always been my utmost priority in life, and I have never thought about his appearance, his height etc., etc., but in fact his face is Asian and yes he does have black hair.

Just one small long-term result is that I now enjoy a wonderful son/best friend relationship with my son and I cherish this enormously, and it gets comments from others about how close we are and the devotion in both directions.

And what gives me enormous joy today is that my son (and his lovely Thai wife) are now repeating the same devotion and caring for their young daughter. There is no discussion whatever about her appearance, but what does ocassionally get mentioned is the good fortune that she's very healthy.

For me, as I get older, caring for my Thai born son, his wife and their young daughter is now my life work and I am passsionately devoted to this duty and this love.

And I'm going to guess there are many other posters who would share all of the above sentiments.

I really hope you might do some serious rethinking about life.

[ivowatson]

what a stupid bloody post,,,my wifes just after having a beautifull baby girl ,,she now 3 mths old and absolutely nothing wotsoever wrong with her,,,whats behind ur thinking????

Please, send the baby to a (good) school.

[bswift1234]

dont have a child ,and you should really think ,are you wasting your ladies life as maybe you will never want to have a family with her,maybe you should let her move on,,i have a 17 month old son irish\thai,he changed my life over night and my love for him is vast,the word mixed race ? really what does that mean ,it doesnt really mean anything to me ,,i have two nephews the same age as my son both irish and they are roughly the same height so far so no issue there ,he has brown hair and the most beautiful dark eyes ive ever seen,the only comments i ever get when were out is that he will break hearts when he gets older ,so dont worry about getting picked on or anything,the whole world is so mixed now that nobody really knows where anybody comes from

I know aspects of this topic have been covered before, but I was wondering if anyone out there has ever decided NOT to have a mixed race (thai/farang) kid for whatever reason? I'm still in my early twenties and having kids is a far-off goal, but thinking about it has seriously made me think about whether it's moral for me to keep staying in a relationship with a gf I'd never want kids with. I know this sounds trite, but one of the main things I'd worry about is that my kid would be short... I'm average height (5'10'') but with the gf, I don't think he (if) would ever be over 5'7'' If the kid has other problems, being short could seriously mess him up. Also, I'm worried he'll have jet black hair or eyes, despite the fact I've heard that half asian kids can be blonde (like their father, me). If he were to ever live in the US, I wouldn't want him characterized with Mexicans, Mediterraneans, or other Asians for his complexion- it's racist I know, but it's a reality that people discriminate in the US. So what do people think? Do are mixed kids looked on as handsome in your home countries, am I overthinking it?

[wolf5370]

17-year-old Malee Duangdee, is the tallest girl in the world with a height of 6ft 10ins - she is Thai. Get over the stereotypes, Thais are not all 4 foot dead you know - I'm shorter than some of my Thai friends.

Hair colour is a weak gene - it will be any colour from blonde to black (depending on the genetic history of both families and mutation) - my girls both have brown hair (I have brown hair - their mother has black).

Eye colour will most likely be some kind of brown (from light to quite dark) - blue eyes are recessive - I once read a paper that said everyone will eventually have brown eyes (it ignored mutation of course, which is why we don't all have brown eyes already). My girls both have golden brown eyes (My wife's eyes are medium brown and mine vary from blue through grey to green like mood-stones!).

Their skin colour (I saw you at least stayed clear of that one!) is also likely to go from white to possibly darker than the mother (again those dastardly genetic histories!). My wife has light golden skin colour (because of her Chinese ancestry?) as do all her siblings except her brother who is slightly darker. I am naturally as white as milk. Our kids are light skinned - white but tan easily (which is a blessing - I go lobster pink instead!).

I can see both my wife and myself in both our kids - they are both beautiful to us and we love them dearly - you will too. If you seriously have these hang ups, then either get past it - or find a nice white girl with 6 foot plus brothers/father.

Sure kids can be cruel at school - they will always find something: skin colour, dad's car, clothes, name, hair colour, teeth, something made up like smell or fleas, whatever. There is just no point in thinking about what can happen and how they will be treated, because they will have friends and enemies at school at some point - everyone does. I bet you got called names at some point by some kids at school - even with your eugenically perfect make-up.

Edited July 24, 2009 by wolf5370

[bobbysan124]

If you decide to have kids, just hope that they're healthy. Try to provide them with a decent opportunity for a good life. They'll take care of themselves and the rest regardless of your apprehensions.

[Blackandwhite]

Well,

when I first read your post I thought it was a joke but as I read on I realised the pure insanity of your questions, thoughts and remarks were that of a very insecure, self absorbed and selfish person

I have a daughter that is mixed race half Thai half English, she is the most wonderful thing I have ever seen, she has very long black curly hair, dark brown eyes, dark olive colour skin, tallest in her class and I am only 5'' 8 she is also very intelligent compared to most of the children in here school here in the Uk, she is the most popular child in her school which I add is a small village school in the middle of the country side, she also does child modelling and plays gymnastics and ballet for the county,

Maybe in America they see people differently but that is your choice to debate what the Americans will think of your child, to think some of America's most famous and looked up stars are of mixed race, Ja-loy, would be enough to settle your thoughts.

At the end of the day you can only understand what others might think based on the way you think yourself, you sound a little to shalow to start thinking about producing a new life of a person that could grow up with the same low mental capacity as you.

Get the snip is my advise

[63Tommy1]

Thai mothers cant have Ginger kids, thats the main reason for me having a Thai wife.

Ok, any Asian woman will be OK they all lack the "Ginger-gene", just happened to fall in love with Nok

Happy father to 2 non-ginger kids!

Tommy

[Ananke]

A Eurasian friend of mine was married to an only child caucasian American once, and he had a mother who lost a lot of sleep over the fate of her future grandchildren for the very same reasons you state here. "The kids will look strange, be discriminated against, and have miserable lives" etc. Of course we all thought she was insane ....

Now, it's wierd, because she seemed to genuinely like my friend, and genuinely worry about the fate of her grandchildren, and she couldn't see that it was exactly people who thought like her who would be the perpetrators of her grandchildren's supposed misery. (As it turned out, they didn't have children together - he left her to marry a Chinese girl.)

In any case, I think what I would like to kindly say to you is that if it is reassurance of some sort you are looking for, that the lives of your future mixed race kids will be all fine and dandy, then I don't think you'll ever find that. Nobody can give that. Shit happens, to mongrels and freaks and pure breeds, and everyone, and it's not all about race or hair colour. If you really want to freak out now about the unknown fate of future children you may or may not have with your girl friend, it's probably more relavent to choose something else - global warming, war, famine, flooding, or the end of the world and all that for example.

And if as you say, you are not racist, and you really love your girlfriend, and you end up at some point in the future having a mixed race child or three with her, then instinct and statistics are stacked on your side that you will love them what ever height or colour. And I would bet that you would in that case, not take them to spend their childhood in some extreme mixed-race hating, dark-haired discriminating strong hold, are you?

But you know what? I think you reeeeeeeely are not ready for kids, mate!

Edited January 31, 2010 by Ananke

[MikeyIdea]

OP - don't have kids YET. You are very childish in your values and as such, you are not yet a suitable parent.

You could perhaps grow up and also become less egocentric and thereby more suitable, keep your eyes open, analyze yourself and one day you may find that you can laugh at what you have written here.

[Gonsalviz]

I have 3. 2 are dark skinned. The youngest looks like any white westerner. Except that she has won many beauty contests. The other daughter is a fine dark skinned Thai looking lady and the boy has been compared to Tiger Woods, but he says he is better looking than Tiger.

All are very well adjusted in the USA.

All went through university on scholarships. (good for me).

Girls are 5'4" and 5'5". Boy is 6'.

Looks like you may be prejudiced without knowing it.

[eurasianthai]

I actually would have loved him to have blue eyes and I knew it would be very unlikely.

But besides that, I had no reservations.

And I thank my lucky stars every day for not having had some.

Edited February 9, 2010 by eurasianthai

[learningcurve]

My wife and I have 2 young children. Our daughter has just turned 7 years old and looking at her you would not think that her mother is Thai. When she was younger and was out with her mother, other Thai women would approach my wife and ask her how much the farang was paying her to look after his child! Our son is almost the same, only the shape of his eyes give away his Thai genes. When meeting and speaking with people for the first time (we have recently moved back to the UK), most do not believe that my wife is the childrens mother!