My Gf Wants A Salary!

[robblok]

Run to the hills and never look back.

On the other hand are you 50-60 you fat ugly and your gf 24 and drop dead gorgous then some compensation is in order

[rethaired]

She works and can make about 150,000 B min. a year. For the record, I have not paid her and do not really intent to. Of course, I like to treat her once in a while and do pay half of the rent and the gas whenever I am using it. I am 47, not fat, bold, and have all my teeth. And, yes, I could afford it, but do not feel this would fit my definition of LOVE, as universally defined! Will I miss her, not really! As much as the meaningless conversation we have about nothing!

Edited August 8, 2009 by rethaired

[KevinBloodyWilson]

Walk away and never look back. And never even think about it again.

Kev

[robblok]

She works and can make about 150,000 B min. a year.

Then why does she need your money.

[rayong09]

A top showcase girl in a GoGo would expect 30-50,000 a month to leave and be a "kept" woman. An average BG would have to go with at least 2 or 3 customers a day to earn that, so unless your GF is some super stunner that turns heads on every Soi shes being completely unrealistic in the real world.

Remember every woman is worth something, whether they are a BG or not, that doesn't mean you need to give them a salary that's not right but if she is that important in your life and makes your life that much better then there is no harm in topping her wages up now and then so shes knows you appreciate her. ALL WOMEN need to feel appreciated, lose that thought and you will lose her.....eventually.

Edited August 8, 2009 by rayong09

[neverdie]

So she makes 12,500 per month, so if shes wanting to give up work to be kept by you, why is her price so high?

[britmaveric]

^last time I checked you do not pay your gf, so if this is the appreciation she wants then I suggest the OP moves on.

[mrtoad]

So she makes 12,500 per month, so if shes wanting to give up work to be kept by you, why is her price so high?

I think you know the answer to that.

[waza]

Hmmm my GF has offered me 20,000baht per month to stay in Thailand with her. Was I right to refuse or Should I accept or hold out for the 30,000 BG salary?

[Moonrakers]

She works and can make about 150,000 B min. a year.

And so I presume that she contributes to the rent etc.

For the record, I have not paid her and do not really intent to.

Good man.

[neverdie]

So she makes 12,500 per month, so if shes wanting to give up work to be kept by you, why is her price so high?

I think you know the answer to that.

I'm trying to stimulate his 'brain' ......I just need to locate it first

[hhgz]

" my GF is asking for a salary"

GFs don't want a salary, prostitutes do. It's your choice.

[Moonrakers]

So she makes money and is asking for more which would indicate that you pay all of the bills.

Point this out to her, and let her know that not only will she not be getting extra money but she actually owes you money for all of the rent etc that you have paid for her.

[Geekfreaklover]

So she makes money and is asking for more which would indicate that you pay all of the bills.

Point this out to her, and let her know that not only will she not be getting extra money but she actually owes you money for all of the rent etc that you have paid for her.

It's obvious that 'rent' is being paid.

Dump her. She's a wrong one.

[mostcurious]

She works and can make about 150,000 B min. a year. For the record, I have not paid her and do not really intent to. Of course, I like to treat her once in a while and do pay half of the rent and the gas whenever I am using it. I am 47, not fat, bold, and have all my teeth. And, yes, I could afford it, but do not feel this would fit my definition of LOVE, as universally defined! Will I miss her, not really! As much as the meaningless conversation we have about nothing!

Ask her to talk to the local bank manager about opening up an ISA account for this 150,000 B, invest the money in gold, or maybe date the bank manager

In the mean time RUN away.

[zorro1]

oh dear she knows how much a bar girl gets? how would she know that

[givenall]

Cast your line into the waters and catch another girl

It surprises me how many farang have GF over here for themselves when they come here for only couple a week here and then. I can grantee that 99% of these GF have more than one BF.

Ask her how many BF she has and then divide the salary by that. Or just get a new GF when you come over here. It is a lot more fun and cost efffffffffffffffffffffffffffective too

[Ferwert]

How come I am so dam_n contrary to many on this board.

There is nothing wrong with giving her a monthly stipend, with some stringent conditions:

#1. The bargirl thing is over. You cannot control this, so foh-get about all of this, until you stop commuting back to your home country. But if you have any misgivings about her 'activties', a monthly stipend would be the first thing that would need to be considered. A private investigator would be the next thing. But the hel_l with it, get yourself a professional, salaried lady. Dont underestimate your market value so much. They are available everywhere. Break out of that dam_n bargirl syndrome.

# 2. Should this lady be the dream of your life however, at the very least separate yourself from the famdamily. This stipend is one way of doing that. Use the stipend as the 'firewall' between yourself and the famdamily. Whatever stipend you give her, any moneys flowing to the family comes from that stipend. The more she gives, the less she has for herself. This rule must be rigidly enforced and adhered to. Dont give the famdamily access to Farang pockets - ever and forever! No matter wot you do financially, they dont appreciate it anyway. The daughter owes it to them, regardless where it comes from.

# 3. How much should the stipend be. Let me put on my professional salary administration hat from a previous life. Her use of bargirl salary as a measuring stick is actually quite good - from the perspective of using employment to determine her earning power (EP). Her EP should determine stipend size....But not bargirl EP. bargirl EP has nothing to do with a normal life that she would presumably be living with you. With her quals., could she get a job at Big C, or Tesco? I think they earn about 5,000 baht a month. That should be your measuring stick. Perhaps with a little sweetener for being the love of your life. But rule #2 applies unquestionably.

# 4. I have much other tried 'n true advice about living happilly with a Thai lady in Thailand, in a balanced way. Where there are checks and balances between Farang and Thai lady, ensuring that one can never take advantage of the other. This is just the stipend part. For example my money is not our money, buying land from mama and papa is a fraud, back-end load any financials to the Thai lady to encourage a lifetime of good behavior, ie house purchase only by mortage or by rent, leave an inheritance, etc., etc.

Edited August 8, 2009 by Ferwert

[Moonrakers]

How come I am so dam_n contrary to many on this board.

There is nothing wrong with giving her a monthly stipend, with some stringent conditions:

#1. The bargirl thing is over. You cannot control this, so foh-get about all of this, until you stop commuting back to your home country. But if you have any misgivings about her 'activties', a monthly stipend would be the first thing that would need to be considered. A private investigator would be the next thing. But the hel_l with it, get yourself a professional, salaried lady. Dont underestimate your market value so much. They are available everywhere. Break out of that dam_n bargirl syndrome.

# 2. Should this lady be the dream of your life however, at the very least separate yourself from the famdamily. This stipend is one way of doing that. Use the stipend as the 'firewall' between yourself and the famdamily. Whatever stipend you give her, any moneys flowing to the family comes from that stipend. The more she gives, the less she has for herself. This rule must be rigidly enforced and adhered to. Dont give the famdamily access to Farang pockets - ever and forever! No matter wot you do financially, they dont appreciate it anyway. The daughter owes it to them, regardless where it comes from.

# 3. How much should the stipend be. Let me put on my professional salary administration hat from a previous life. Her use of bargirl salary as a measuring stick is actually quite good - from the perspective of using employment to determine her earning power (EP). Her EP should determine stipend size....But not bargirl EP. bargirl EP has nothing to do with a normal life that she would presumably be living with you. With her quals., could she get a job at Big C, or Tesco? I think they earn about 5,000 baht a month. That should be your measuring stick. Perhaps with a little sweetener for being the love of your life. But rule #2 applies unquestionably.

# 4. I have much other tried 'n true advice about living happily with a Thai lady in Thailand, in a balanced way. Where there are checks and balances between Farang and Thai lady, ensuring that one can never take advantage of the other. This is just the stipend part. For example my money is not our money, buying land from mama and papa is a fraud, back-end load any financials to the Thai lady to encourage a lifetime of good behavior, leave an inheritance, etc., etc.

Do you get a lawyer to draw up your relationship contracts?

[Kitsch22]

Well well ... there you go rethaired, pretty conclusive isn't it: time to move on - actually, come to think of it you didn't really need forum members to tell you that, now did you.

Of course not. But then nobody really thought that the OP's question was a sincere request for genuinely needed advice, did they?

[jombom]

The answer is in your question.

Preferable choices are to

1 Do not renew the relationship on your next visit and do not send her money while you are in your own country. She will find somebody else before you get back.

2 Encourage her to leave by reducing her income.

Very few bargirls get 30,000 Bt per month - only A league players. Most are very happy to break 15k per month. Most bar girls are happy to take a job as a cashier or mamasan which pays 10k per month to compensate them for not being allowed to take customers during normal working hours.

BTW your name suggests ''retired'' with ''thai'' inserted in place of ''ti'', but you mention returning to work in your own country. Please do not bring more confusion to a land which is awash with confused people.

[Ferwert]

Moonraker - I slightly "editted" my post. You may wish to re-read. As long as financials remain in your control as my post discusses, it should diminish the need for lawyerly intervention......but it wouldn' hurt.

[Ferwert]

How come I am so dam_n contrary to many on this board.

There is nothing wrong with giving her a monthly stipend, with some stringent conditions:

#1. The bargirl thing is over. You cannot control this, so foh-get about all of this, until you stop commuting back to your home country. But if you have any misgivings about her 'activties', a monthly stipend would be the first thing that would need to be considered. A private investigator would be the next thing. But the hel_l with it, get yourself a professional, salaried lady. Dont underestimate your market value so much. They are available everywhere. Break out of that dam_n bargirl syndrome.

# 2. Should this lady be the dream of your life however, at the very least separate yourself from the famdamily. This stipend is one way of doing that. Use the stipend as the 'firewall' between yourself and the famdamily. Whatever stipend you give her, any moneys flowing to the family comes from that stipend. The more she gives, the less she has for herself. This rule must be rigidly enforced and adhered to. Dont give the famdamily access to Farang pockets - ever and forever! No matter wot you do financially, they dont appreciate it anyway. The daughter owes it to them, regardless where it comes from.

# 3. How much should the stipend be. Let me put on my professional salary administration hat from a previous life. Her use of bargirl salary as a measuring stick is actually quite good - from the perspective of using employment to determine her earning power (EP). Her EP should determine stipend size....But not bargirl EP. bargirl EP has nothing to do with a normal life that she would presumably be living with you. With her quals., could she get a job at Big C, or Tesco? I think they earn about 5,000 baht a month. That should be your measuring stick. Perhaps with a little sweetener for being the love of your life. But rule #2 applies unquestionably.

# 4. I have much other tried 'n true advice about living happilly with a Thai lady in Thailand, in a balanced way. Where there are checks and balances between Farang and Thai lady, ensuring that one can never take advantage of the other. This is just the stipend part. For example my money is not our money, buying land from mama and papa is a fraud, back-end load any financials to the Thai lady to encourage a lifetime of good behavior, ie house purchase only by mortage or by rent, leave an inheritance, etc., etc.

X

[Soutpeel]

Do you get a lawyer to draw up your relationship contracts?

Sounds like some of the project managers I have worked with....

Ferwert, you must be wonderful fun to be married to....

EP...come on..

Personally think the OP needs to be thinking...is THB 30k/month too much to be paying for playing hide the sausage, for a few weeks in the year ??...

[RAZZELL]

She works and can make about 150,000 B min. a year. For the record, I have not paid her and do not really intent to. Of course, I like to treat her once in a while and do pay half of the rent and the gas whenever I am using it. I am 47, not fat, bold, and have all my teeth. And, yes, I could afford it, but do not feel this would fit my definition of LOVE, as universally defined! Will I miss her, not really! As much as the meaningless conversation we have about nothing!

Mmmm...I don't think it's quite as clear-cut as a lot of posters have said.

You say she's your gf but you don't love her? And you pay a bit towards her rent and gas bills "when you are using it"?

Mmmm... last of the big spenders...

If I was in a long distance relationship with a Thai gf, where I spent maybe 50/50 of my time with her I would have no problem with paying at least my share of the rent/bills etc.

You are in a relationship, which is a partnership. You take responsiblity for each other and share things - including the bills!

From your last post it doesn't sound like you're treating her particularly well. Maybe you've fallen short of her definition of a partner!

Although, I agree the request for 30,000 a month is a bit strong. That's a reasonable graduate salary.

In the West a lot of men give there wife or gf a salary to run the household, pay the bills, food etc. Why not? Especially if she doesn't work/gives up work to look after you.

RAZZ

Edited August 8, 2009 by RAZZELL

[rethaired]

She is not a BG, but works in the tourism industry (and I know that for a fact since she has a licence. I cannot know if she was a BG before. She has never told me! Joking! Let's be honest! No man alive can know for sure what was the dark-side of a woman IF she does not want you to know! She might tell you, but will you know for sure it is not another story! In her line of work, she sometimes frequents BGs.

She does not come from Isaan, but she is a farmer's daughter. She is 30. I am 47.

I am splitting the B 4000 rent as she used to pay 2000 B for 12 m2 apartment and I would have to pay minimum about B 4000 myself. So this seemed a win-win situation for both of us. I usually pay for food and give her sometimes other gifts when people do.

I am in the process of buying a car, but she wants me to put it on her name and, when I tell her, I want to put it in on my name, she does not want the car anymore. This makes me VERY suspicious, especially considering she does not have a downpayment. She asks me to trust her, but then when I ask her to trust me to put the name of the car on my name (so that she can theoretically be absolved of all the financial responsibilities and allow her to save some to have a downpayment for land/house and such, which is a good compromise since foreigners cannot own land anyway), she is not interested, saying that she is not able to save money!

Edited August 8, 2009 by rethaired

[zorro1]

She is not a BG, but works in the tourism industry (and I know that for a fact since she has a licence. I cannot know if she was a BG before. She has never told me! Joking! Let's be honest! No man alive can know for sure what was the dark-side of a woman IF she does not want you to know! She might tell you, but will you know for sure it is not another story! In her line of work, she sometimes frequents BGs.

She does not come from Isaan, but she is a farmer's daughter. She is 30. I am 47.

I am splitting the B 4000 rent as she used to pay 2000 B for 12 m2 apartment and I would have to pay minimum about B 4000 myself. So this seemed a win-win situation for both of us. I usually pay for food and give her sometimes other gifts when people do.

I am in the process of buying a car, but she wants me to put it on her name and, when I tell her, I want to put it in on my name, she does not want the car anymore. This makes me VERY suspicious.

Do it , give her the money and the car. a few hundred k is a small price to pay to learn one of the best lessons in your life. Your going to do it anyway cause you wuv her and of course we could all be wrong cynical bunch that we are

Edited August 8, 2009 by zorro1

[RAZZELL]

I am in the process of buying a car, but she wants me to put it on her name

On second thoughts...RUN!

RAZZ

[SMEEERE]

Well this is a polite way to put it .

"A top showcase girl in a GoGo would expect 30-50,000 a month to leave and be a "kept" woman" ..

Now for the life of me i dont undersatand why anyone would want the busiest prostitute in the place.and if your "woman " is uneducated and from issan asking for any more than 8000 a month is a joke, as others have said tell here to get a job, the problem is the only job she now knows is the one you have stopped her doing !,. ( if she is a bargirl )

[Geekfreaklover]

She works and can make about 150,000 B min. a year. For the record, I have not paid her and do not really intent to. Of course, I like to treat her once in a while and do pay half of the rent and the gas whenever I am using it. I am 47, not fat, bold, and have all my teeth. And, yes, I could afford it, but do not feel this would fit my definition of LOVE, as universally defined! Will I miss her, not really! As much as the meaningless conversation we have about nothing!

Mmmm...I don't think it's quite as clear-cut as a lot of posters have said.

You say she's your gf but you don't love her? And you pay a bit towards her rent and gas bills "when you are using it"?

Mmmm... last of the big spenders...

If I was in a long distance relationship with a Thai gf, where I spent maybe 50/50 of my time with her I would have no problem with paying at least my share of the rent/bills etc.

You are in a relationship, which is a partnership. You take responsiblity for each other and share things - including the bills!

From your last post it doesn't sound like you're treating her particularly well. Maybe you've fallen short of her definition of a partner!

Although, I agree the request for 30,000 a month is a bit strong. That's a reasonable graduate salary.

In the West a lot of men give there wife or gf a salary to run the household, pay the bills, food etc. Why not? Especially if she doesn't work/gives up work to look after you.

RAZZ

I think not. I normally pay employee graduates between 10-12k. Which is reasonable.

Edited August 8, 2009 by Geekfreaklover