how to deal with the ego when your spouse is a high flyer, more educated and earning more than you?

I used to love the fact that she earned more than me. Now she no longer works I miss it.

I'm not sure why it should be a problem ego-wise though, not in this day and age?

Celebrate and retire earlier, perhaps?

Sit back and enjoy it.

Take delight in it and embrace it, be the proudest man in the room, and let her know how proud of her you are.

You're not in competition with your wife, you are a partnership.

" be hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise"

You and you're marriage will be happier and better for it.

My gf's monthly salary is a bit more than my day-rate, but it is a small margin, so we have just learned to live with it.

Celebrate and retire earlier, perhaps?

You talk a lot about retirement, don't you?

It saddens me when I read about men who spend more or less their entire adult lives working purely in order that they can ..... retire.

I don't wish to retire. I doubt Sir Alex Ferguson wishes to retire. I doubt Warren Buffet wishes to retire. I doubt Sir Richard Branson wishes to retire.

You don't need to retire, little Bendix. You just need to get yourself a life.

Take a risk. Be brave. Be bold. Be daring.

I have friends in Singapore (husband and wife, same age, local Chinese), she earns massive commissions on oil trading, he earns a quite nice professional salary.

- She says she wishes she had the lower stress situation her husband enjoys.

- He confirms she works under deep stress.

- He tries hard to make life as easy as possible for her, to limit family chores, plan things, shopping, etc.

- They have an agreement that she will stay in this job until they have reached a savings goal whereby they can have a very sizable nest egg, own a good home, big investments for kids education, etc, and then both work part-time in non stress jobs, and contribute actively to the community. Probably about 45 years old.

Their both very balanced people, they're pretty happy.

I have no issue with it. During our early relationship I was earning considerably more than my partner. Since we have been in Thailand she is a far more "profitable" commodity and she has landed a very nice job. I am the stay at home Dad, I keep myself busy with studying, the home and our daughter. My wife is pleased with how I support her life. 5 years down the road from here? Who knows? The important thing is to remember that we are a team and we have to work together to stay together and get the best from our choice in each other.

I love it

Great thread that will be enjoyed by many posters - for different reasons..

It saddens me when I read about men who spend more or less their entire adult lives working purely in order that they can ..... retire.

I don't wish to retire.

What saddens, you the thought that others have planned for the future or the knowledge that you did not and you are going to be granted your wish?

If my wife made more money than me, I would simply trade my wallet for her purse....

I want a beach facing home in Huahin and golf memberships in Cha-am...

I also want a Sony Playstation and Xbox360 with the camera attachment that sits on top of the 70inch flat screen (preferably internet capabilities)

Last but not least, I would like a 2012 BMW M3... Sedan (I consider the family, see?)... Red on red....

Thank you...

555

Put your ego on one side and celebrate. That's good news in my book

+ Don't forget to ask for more pocket money

Well I would tell her that I must send 2000 Euro every month to my poor parents in Europe.

And that they would like to have a new pickup kombi.

And of course there are situations when the cow is sick or Mama is in the hospital.

Does spending more than me count?

My television is too small... and I don't have an iPad like my friends... and my 3GS needs replacement, because of the battery...

And most of all: I would be proud of her, tell her every day how perfect she is and how much I love her and I would tell her same same if she would earn less...

so... I could not care less...

I'd want a Ferrari... Just so long as she doesn't make me the hot chick in the passenger seat !

Celebrate and retire earlier, perhaps?

Perhaps encouraging the spouse to work a little longer? In case she gets bored naturally!

I keep on telling her that we need more holidays..She just doesn't listen, too busy working

It saddens me when I read about men who spend more or less their entire adult lives working purely in order that they can ..... retire.

I don't wish to retire.

What saddens, you the thought that others have planned for the future or the knowledge that you did not and you are going to be granted your wish?

MPB is saddened every morning when he wakes up...............then it goes downhill from there.

This might be the wrong place for advice on this problem

Try signing-up for some GCSE's or maybe pottery classes.

Probably do your ego the world of good.

It saddens me when I read about men who spend more or less their entire adult lives working purely in order that they can ..... retire.

I don't wish to retire.

What saddens, you the thought that others have planned for the future or the knowledge that you did not and you are going to be granted your wish?

there is the parabel "The Fox and the sour Grapes"...

Never understood this thing about who gets the best salary... If your married your a team who cares if the wife or husband earns more... I retired at 21 and will never work again.. Just happy relaxing and soaking up the sun..

She hasnt had a better education than me but I set her up in business ( investement of 4 million baht 5-6 years ago) showed her how to treat customers and she went from 12 k a month salary ina fulltime job to 250k a month in 5 years working for herself.

It paid off for me....... I now do nothing.............BIG TIME hahahah

I am not bothered by this one iota.

I keep on telling her that we need more holidays..She just doesn't listen, too busy working

Sh*t you mean she actually has time to speak with you??? you lucky bas*ard!!!!

Not a problem at all . . . sometimes she does, sometimes I do.

She's doing her DBA at the moment so she's busier than a one-armed paper hanger and her caseload is increasing. Too little time but luckily flexibility comes into it on my part so the family is still fucntioning happily

Why shouldn't a woman earn more . . .

I don't wish to retire. I doubt Sir Alex Ferguson wishes to retire. I doubt Warren Buffet wishes to retire. I doubt Sir Richard Branson wishes to retire.

Rather unrealistic to compare a work-a-day person with those that are fabulously wealthy and most likely have never done a hard days labor in their lives.

As far as working spouses, been there, won't do it again. The first two Mrs Soze were both professional ladies who at the end of the day decided that their careers were more important than our marriage. I have worked over 40 years to build a nice retirement where I can come and go as I please and not be too worried about fiscal matters. IF I decide to get married again, it will be to someone who is more interested in spending time together and enjoying our lives as apposed to someone driven by the need to earn a crush.

I don't know what you consider a hard day's work but I don't think Richard Branson got rich by sitting around on his backside.