Farang/Thai Relationships - The Good Ones

[edwinclapham]

I used to be a total @sshole ( some may say I am ) I would argue with anyone, see the worst in people etc etc, then I might my wife. I had never known anyone to be so unselfish, patient, caring and giving ( the list could be endless )and strangely enough it's rubbed of on me, to the point that my parents and siblings comment on how much I've changed for the better. We are totally supportive of one another and I like to think we are best friends too. In fact, as I type this my wife is at work slaving away in the kitchen of our restaurant. I guess I'm saying I'm a happy and very proud man.

Great inspiring post

[WebBangkok]

I met my wife in Uni in Sydney. I was doing a BA and she was doing her masters in the same things. I was 22 and she was 25. Its been 10 years now as I am 32 and she is 35 (I swear she has not aged one bit)

I thought she was hot as hell and made my move 10 years ago and glad I did, first Thai girl I ever been with. Was quite proud at the time as there wsa a few guys trying to pick her up that I know of, but I got her (One of those pat yourself on the back moments ).

She is half Thai and half chinese. So I guess that qualifies as Thai Chinese? Well she got a splash of Sth American in her too, but not noticeable, her grandmother was half Sth American.

She worked for Ingram Micro and was a manager after only 2 years working there, has a real drive like her father which I like, also had some other traits like her father which isnt so nice, but nobody is perfect, I have some bad habits too.

We both made a decent amount of money before moving here, set up quite well in Australia first before we moved over here and got things to go back to if everything here goes belly up.

We both work in the same company and running it now. I thought I was a driven person, but I am probably a lazy ass compared to her.

I also don't get whats the deal with people saying they have a Thai Chinese wife? Something I am missing?

[chrisinth]

The best thing you can do is not let your assets get lopsided in the direction of your wife. A Thai wife cannot take everything if it is not first given to her.

Why would she "take it"?? I dont understand some of the people here...why would you have an intimate relationship with someone if you could not even trust them with some money or assets?

I like that GAS; if you don't have trust, you don't have a true relationship, simple as that. It doesn't matter who your wife was, or who you were; that is history. If you have developed a trusting bond, two-sided, then it will work.

Likely won't all be a bed of roses, but it will work. My wife (yes, she is Thai) is probably my best friend and I am extremely proud to say that.

[TommoPhysicist]

.......... many of us post our stories there, to provide a counter point to the " Thais are bad, Thai women will steal your money" type of thread.

..............

I personally know of one Isaan woman that was screwed by a farang man here in Thailand

1) I think anyone who steals my money is bad ...... why pick out Thais or women in particular.

2) I also personally know many Issan women who have been screwed by white men ...... stating the obvious or what!

Edited June 20, 2012 by TommoPhysicist

[sirineou]

In 2003 I decided to go to Oz with a 1 month stopover in Thailand. Whilst in Thailand I met someone that I thought was perfect wife material. The stopover lasted for 14 months and I paid for EVERYTHING except I dinner at the Pizza Company. During this time we had a lot of arguements because she seemed so perfect and I'd read and heard that this is what Thai women do - act perfect, but just want money.

The naysayers had wormed into my brain and were causing me to doubt my instincts. No one could put up this act so consistently though, could they?

As money dwindled I realised I needed to do something quick. I was offered a job back home in the UK, so I decided to take it - but what to do with the girl?

Being pushed into a corner advice was given to me to leave her as I'll get over it - plenty more fish in the sea and all that. But the great thing about advice is that you can ignore it, and with an 'oh fuc_k it' moment I decided to marry her and take her with me.

Arriving in the UK with a Thai bride was met with much sniggering and 'be careful' advice from family and friends. Then things took a turn for the worse as my job offer never materialised and I was unemployed for 9 months. So living with my parents we were broke and stuck. Now this is the when everyone was expecting my Thai bride to do a vanishing act.

What she did was take a job cleaning at a hospital, supporting her husband and never ONCE complained that I had to spend her money.

Ever since we have been together our money has been exactly that, OUR money. If either of us want anything they will run it past the other first and never has either of us said no, just sometimes maybe wait a bit.

We are both very happy with an awesome 3 year old son and I believe our relationship is as strong as any. She knows all my bank accounts as I do hers. All our savings, collateral and investments are in her name, but I do not lose a wink of sleep over it - because I trust her.

I know that will have many people on here pissing their pants and offering their thoughts and advice, but you know what............I trust my instincts now more than ever.

Oh, P.S. She is not Thai Chinese hi-so or educated beyond Pratom 6. She comes from a village in the south and she is my Jungle Princess.

Nice story MJJ

My story is almost the same,

To make a long story short

Came to Thailand for a trade show,

met my now Thai wife

had a three year relationship and started to learn as much as I could about Thailand

From what a read on the Thai forums, I started to get paranoid, Thank God I did not act on those paranoid instincts,

decided to throw caution to the wind and married the girl.

When we got back in the US, the economy went to hell, lost a ton of money in Real estate, the jewelry business went to hell

we literally lost everything.

to make money, I had to live our Florida home and go to NY to work with the Carpenters Union that I used to work when I was young

and had to be away from my new wife months at a time,

My wife, new to the states, and from a village in Isaan, went to school,improved her English, learned a trade, and supported me all this tine, did not complain once.

During these troubled times, I had two friends who committed suicide,

One, a 40 year old stock broker who lost everything,and had no other skills other than trading, he lost his credit, and was dead in the water did not know what to do, then his American GF left him, one day we found him Hung in his waterfront home that was under foreclosure.

The Other one an older lady who was the owner of a property appraisal company where my Ex-wife worked. She had no one, and when she lost it all, did not have the straight to start over. She took a deadly dose of sleeping pills.

I cant help but think where I would be if I did not have my wife to support me during those difficult times.

My Thai wife is the love of my life,her and my Daughters are the most important thing in my life

I can only give you one piece of advice to the OP

Keep a level head

trust your instincts

and don't become paranoid

To win you got to be in the game,

[pattayadingo]

The other day I had quite a serious accident that meant me suffering bodily injury and the loss of some possessions including my mobile phone. The local rescue people took me to a hospital somewhere in the 'outback' to be cared for by the doctors and nurses.

In this small hospital hardly anyone spoke English at all and what English they could speak was limited. When they were getting stumped as to how to get an understanding of what was needed, I asked them to phone an ex g/f who I have known for 3 years and seen once in the last year, as hers is the only number I can remember off by heart.

She took the call and sorted everything out over the phone so all could understand what was going on and what needed to be done. She then had a word with her boss and dropped everything at work in Bangkok and got someone to drive her down to find me. When we finally met up after some mix ups due to me not having a phone until I got a lift home to use my spare phone, she stayed 2 days to ensure everything was OK. Then she went back to BKK. She phones 3 times a day to make sure I am doing okay. She is willing to be there at the other end of the phone to help in an instant.

There are good Thai people out there, even ex g/f's.

As an aside, if I'd had my phone, there are several other Thai people I could have phoned and they would have helped too, but I doubt they would have / could have dropped what they were doing at work instantly to come to me, stay with me at the hospital and then take me home, clean up, tend to all sorts of little things and make sure I was as best I could be before having to return to work.

Don't believe all bad things about all Thai people. There are good and bad people the world over as there are good and bad Thai people and I for one am grateful i have some numbers of really good Thai people.

[RAZZELL]

I also don't get whats the deal with people saying they have a Thai Chinese wife? Something I am missing?

It's shorthand for "My wife is from a rich, educated family and is also light-skinned unlike her darker skinned, poorer sisters from Isaan/the South and is definitely not a bargirl/former bargirl/and doesn't even know what a bar is" etc etc etc

RAZZ

Edited June 20, 2012 by RAZZELL

[maxme]

Comparing people from Isaan with southern people here is a little touch much don't you think?

Like comparing the Englishmen with the Welsh

[nattydread]

I think i am going to be sick reading all these sugar sweet lubbed up posts from grown men

but heres an oldie that fits the bill

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FH0Q2lBK9-U&list=PLB6074A629A007EA4&index=45&feature=plpp_video

[tmd5855]

The other day I had quite a serious accident that meant me suffering bodily injury and the loss of some possessions including my mobile phone. The local rescue people took me to a hospital somewhere in the 'outback' to be cared for by the doctors and nurses.

In this small hospital hardly anyone spoke English at all and what English they could speak was limited. When they were getting stumped as to how to get an understanding of what was needed, I asked them to phone an ex g/f who I have known for 3 years and seen once in the last year, as hers is the only number I can remember off by heart.

She took the call and sorted everything out over the phone so all could understand what was going on and what needed to be done. She then had a word with her boss and dropped everything at work in Bangkok and got someone to drive her down to find me. When we finally met up after some mix ups due to me not having a phone until I got a lift home to use my spare phone, she stayed 2 days to ensure everything was OK. Then she went back to BKK. She phones 3 times a day to make sure I am doing okay. She is willing to be there at the other end of the phone to help in an instant.

There are good Thai people out there, even ex g/f's.

As an aside, if I'd had my phone, there are several other Thai people I could have phoned and they would have helped too, but I doubt they would have / could have dropped what they were doing at work instantly to come to me, stay with me at the hospital and then take me home, clean up, tend to all sorts of little things and make sure I was as best I could be before having to return to work.

Don't believe all bad things about all Thai people. There are good and bad people the world over as there are good and bad Thai people and I for one am grateful i have some numbers of really good Thai people.

I had similar occur to me. Never went out with the girl but we had always exchanged pleasantries. Fell ill, she heard all about and came to see me. Took me in her car to hospital, she had gathered all the documents needed and "Took care" Later she would take nothing from me.................. There are some remarkable ladies out there who will make any man their King.

I can only speak good of Thai ladies, because they have never done bad to me.

[edwinclapham]

The other day I had quite a serious accident that meant me suffering bodily injury and the loss of some possessions including my mobile phone. The local rescue people took me to a hospital somewhere in the 'outback' to be cared for by the doctors and nurses.

In this small hospital hardly anyone spoke English at all and what English they could speak was limited. When they were getting stumped as to how to get an understanding of what was needed, I asked them to phone an ex g/f who I have known for 3 years and seen once in the last year, as hers is the only number I can remember off by heart.

She took the call and sorted everything out over the phone so all could understand what was going on and what needed to be done. She then had a word with her boss and dropped everything at work in Bangkok and got someone to drive her down to find me. When we finally met up after some mix ups due to me not having a phone until I got a lift home to use my spare phone, she stayed 2 days to ensure everything was OK. Then she went back to BKK. She phones 3 times a day to make sure I am doing okay. She is willing to be there at the other end of the phone to help in an instant.

There are good Thai people out there, even ex g/f's.

As an aside, if I'd had my phone, there are several other Thai people I could have phoned and they would have helped too, but I doubt they would have / could have dropped what they were doing at work instantly to come to me, stay with me at the hospital and then take me home, clean up, tend to all sorts of little things and make sure I was as best I could be before having to return to work.

Don't believe all bad things about all Thai people. There are good and bad people the world over as there are good and bad Thai people and I for one am grateful i have some numbers of really good Thai people.

Hope you are recovering PD, and you are so right, there are extremely good people out there.

[Galong]

Why do people insist on using the derogatory word farang? It's bad enough when Thais use it.

Because it is not derogatory.

What do you think is the origin? The two likely origins of the word are calling us all French or if you believe it is a modification of another word, they're calling us infidels. Why not simply call us foreigners or Westerners?

[Semper]

Why not simply call us foreigners or Westerners?

I think those words (compared to Farang) are difficult for the average Thai to pronounce.

[tartempion]

Normal relationships here are common.

+176

[pattayadingo]

The other day I had quite a serious accident that meant me suffering bodily injury and the loss of some possessions including my mobile phone. The local rescue people took me to a hospital somewhere in the 'outback' to be cared for by the doctors and nurses.

In this small hospital hardly anyone spoke English at all and what English they could speak was limited. When they were getting stumped as to how to get an understanding of what was needed, I asked them to phone an ex g/f who I have known for 3 years and seen once in the last year, as hers is the only number I can remember off by heart.

She took the call and sorted everything out over the phone so all could understand what was going on and what needed to be done. She then had a word with her boss and dropped everything at work in Bangkok and got someone to drive her down to find me. When we finally met up after some mix ups due to me not having a phone until I got a lift home to use my spare phone, she stayed 2 days to ensure everything was OK. Then she went back to BKK. She phones 3 times a day to make sure I am doing okay. She is willing to be there at the other end of the phone to help in an instant.

There are good Thai people out there, even ex g/f's.

As an aside, if I'd had my phone, there are several other Thai people I could have phoned and they would have helped too, but I doubt they would have / could have dropped what they were doing at work instantly to come to me, stay with me at the hospital and then take me home, clean up, tend to all sorts of little things and make sure I was as best I could be before having to return to work.

Don't believe all bad things about all Thai people. There are good and bad people the world over as there are good and bad Thai people and I for one am grateful i have some numbers of really good Thai people.

Hope you are recovering PD, and you are so right, there are extremely good people out there.

Thanks Yep, I am getting better, slowly. Less pain now.

I am out there tonight in the pub to see if there is yet more sympathy for me from the beautiful Thai women as I hobble about. Maybe I'll have to accentuate the hobble in front of some of the more beautiful ones and see what sympathy they are willing to dish out

[WebBangkok]

I also don't get whats the deal with people saying they have a Thai Chinese wife? Something I am missing?

It's shorthand for "My wife is from a rich, educated family and is also light-skinned unlike her darker skinned, poorer sisters from Isaan/the South and is definitely not a bargirl/former bargirl/and doesn't even know what a bar is" etc etc etc

RAZZ

Yeah, so everyone is expected to of married a girl from Isaan or bar girl in here? lol

[maxme]

I also don't get whats the deal with people saying they have a Thai Chinese wife? Something I am missing?

It's shorthand for "My wife is from a rich, educated family and is also light-skinned unlike her darker skinned, poorer sisters from Isaan/the South and is definitely not a bargirl/former bargirl/and doesn't even know what a bar is" etc etc etc

RAZZ

Yeah, so everyone is expected to of married a girl from Isaan or bar girl in here? lol

Obviously Razzel needs to travel and experience more before making a comment. Since he didn't do that yet posted a comment like that, it proves the point even more.

[aneliane]

Are you kidding me?

I have heard 4 times in the last 3 days how Edwin's wife was great

and what about "my thai wife is lovely", "my thai wife is hot" "my thai wife looks great" " my thai wife looks like Angelina Jolie" ?????

[Semper]

I also don't get whats the deal with people saying they have a Thai Chinese wife? Something I am missing?

It's shorthand for "My wife is from a rich, educated family and is also light-skinned unlike her darker skinned, poorer sisters from Isaan/the South and is definitely not a bargirl/former bargirl/and doesn't even know what a bar is" etc etc etc

RAZZ

Yeah, so everyone is expected to of married a girl from Isaan or bar girl in here? lol

Obviously Razzel needs to travel and experience more before making a comment. Since he didn't do that yet posted a comment like that, it proves the point even more.

Why? I think he's more or less spot on with his definition.

[maxme]

@Semper

Perhaps on some of the TV members here but not overall.

[pattayadingo]

Are you kidding me?

I have heard 4 times in the last 3 days how Edwin's wife was great

and what about "my thai wife is lovely", "my thai wife is hot" "my thai wife looks great" " my thai wife looks like Angelina Jolie" ?????

Have you ever thought that Edwin's wife might be great, sexy, helpful, hot and many other adjectives combined? Some Thai women and men are brilliant. When you find these gems you sometimes want to sing their praises and there is nothing wrong with that. I've been doing the same recently over some very helpful ex g/f's. Praise where praise is due !!!

[Semper]

@Semper

Perhaps on some of the TV members here but not overall.

I assume this was exactly what RAZZEL meant.

[edwinclapham]

Are you kidding me?

I have heard 4 times in the last 3 days how Edwin's wife was great

and what about "my thai wife is lovely", "my thai wife is hot" "my thai wife looks great" " my thai wife looks like Angelina Jolie" ?????

You know Aneliane, I am so sorry that you find my posts regarding my wife offensive. It is a fact that I am inordinately proud of her therefore on the correct threads I have been proud to write just that. If you find those threads nauseating then may I suggest that you flick over the page with your pretty little claws and view something that wont promote bile.

I really dont know the purpose of your presence on the forum, whether you are trolling whatever but I refuse to come down to your level of abject misery that you have imposed upon yourself.

[tinfoilhat]

I do hate the term 'bargirl' used. This is demeaning.

Not as demeaning as calling them 'hookers'.

indeed, i was thinking whore.

[JUDAS]

Are you kidding me?

I have heard 4 times in the last 3 days how Edwin's wife was great

and what about "my thai wife is lovely", "my thai wife is hot" "my thai wife looks great" " my thai wife looks like Angelina Jolie" ?????

You know Aneliane, I am so sorry that you find my posts regarding my wife offensive. It is a fact that I am inordinately proud of her therefore on the correct threads I have been proud to write just that. If you find those threads nauseating then may I suggest that you flick over the page with your pretty little claws and view something that wont promote bile.

I really dont know the purpose of your presence on the forum, whether you are trolling whatever but I refuse to come down to your level of abject misery that you have imposed upon yourself.

It's clearly the norm on TV to cast somewhat negative aspersions towards Thai women in general. I for one find it refreshing to hear the positive which is actually the normal relationship in my experience.

[edwinclapham]

Are you kidding me?

I have heard 4 times in the last 3 days how Edwin's wife was great

and what about "my thai wife is lovely", "my thai wife is hot" "my thai wife looks great" " my thai wife looks like Angelina Jolie" ?????

You know Aneliane, I am so sorry that you find my posts regarding my wife offensive. It is a fact that I am inordinately proud of her therefore on the correct threads I have been proud to write just that. If you find those threads nauseating then may I suggest that you flick over the page with your pretty little claws and view something that wont promote bile.

I really dont know the purpose of your presence on the forum, whether you are trolling whatever but I refuse to come down to your level of abject misery that you have imposed upon yourself.

It's clearly the norm on TV to cast somewhat negative aspersions towards Thai women in general. I for one find it refreshing to hear the positive which is actually the normal relationship in my experience.

Your post was a classic example last night, for which I fully applaud you Judas.

There are many of us that have very fine examples of good relationships.

Many times I feel we make our own luck with the right attitude.

[billd766]

I have known my Thai wife (I call her my Thai wife as I was married to my UK wife at this time) for 19 years now and met her the first week I was here back in 1993 and she ran the kitchen and restaurant at the bar where I had my 49th birthday party organised by the office.

I used to see her mainly at the weekends as I was working nightshifts. I liked her a lot but I was only in BKK for 3 months for work then off to Qatar never to see her again. I used to call her once a month or so and then a year later the company sent me back for another 3 months. We got together again mostly at weekends as I was on the road and sure enough 2 months later I was off to Indonesia.

I was sent back to Thailand again and this time it lasted about 4 years during which time my uk marriage was breaking down and had been for some time until 1997 when I finally told my UK wife (who knew anyway as she wasn't that stupid) that I couldn't live with her any more and I wanted a divorce.

I will skip over the messy bits and say that in 1999 the decree absolte came through and in 2000 I married my Thai lady.

Sad to say guys she is not hi-so, Thai Chinese or even an Issan girl and she did finish her education at 18 and she and her family of Mum, Dad and 3 brothers lived in Bang Na BKK.

She used to work for a Brit in an import/export company in BKK and recruited a friend to help out. Her boss/boyfriend dumper her in favour of her friend and I came along a couple of years later.

I worked offshore as a contractor in the mobile phone industry and she came over to the nice places to be with me now and again.

In 2001 I worked in BKK for 18 months and we moved here to live.

In 2003 we started building a house up country on some land she owned before she met me an some I paid for.

The house was completed in 2004 just about the time our son came along.

She was 39 and I was 60.

She bought some more land and built a shop and restaurant 2 km up the road from the house abd did quite well then rented it out.

We have our ups and downs like any married couple but I figure she is a stayer after 19 years, 12 of them married and a son who will be 8 in August.

The house and land is in her name as is the pickup truck, the 2 motorbikes are in my name and the pensions go into the joint bank account.

Will it last?

I have no idea but I think it will be till death us do part. I hope so anyway as I want to see our son as a man.

[maxme]

Before I wondered about why Aneliane liked to target certain groups here at TV, now I know why...

[edwinclapham]

Before I wondered about why Aneliane liked to target certain groups here at TV, now I know why...

I am afraid when one is being personal about my wife without any grounds then a retort is necessary!

[aneliane]

Are you kidding me?

I have heard 4 times in the last 3 days how Edwin's wife was great

and what about "my thai wife is lovely", "my thai wife is hot" "my thai wife looks great" " my thai wife looks like Angelina Jolie" ?????

You know Aneliane, I am so sorry that you find my posts regarding my wife offensive. It is a fact that I am inordinately proud of her therefore on the correct threads I have been proud to write just that. If you find those threads nauseating then may I suggest that you flick over the page with your pretty little claws and view something that wont promote bile.

I really dont know the purpose of your presence on the forum, whether you are trolling whatever but I refuse to come down to your level of abject misery that you have imposed upon yourself.

Offensive is not the word

tedious, boring, more like it

but you are in a different case since you only use your wife to point out how much "better" she is compared to me; which I think is sick and moot since I would rather choose a chimp than you as husband

frankly I think there should be a specific "relationship with your thai spouse" sub-forum

my thai wife this my thai wife that days on and on ...

Edited June 21, 2012 by aneliane