Where Can I Meet Smart, Professional Thai Women Over 30?

[friendly_yankee]

I am almost 40. I am young at heart, and I look very young. But I want to talk to strong, experienced women. I don't want to do the bar scene.

I am a man who is in CM for two weeks. What is the best way for me to meet smart, professional Thai women between the ages of 30 and 50? I am just looking for friendship, though other things are not out of the question. I would love to go hiking with this woman. Or perhaps to see a movie. Or to Chieng Rai or Doi Suthep. Or an art opening. Really, just talking and sharing ideas about our culture would be great.

Are there certain bars? Or websites? I'm not looking for a bar-girl who will pump up my ego and make me feel good. I'm looking for someone who has dealt with life's storms and come out in one piece.

Thank you!

p.s. I promise that I am not a serial killer. I just want to meet some cool, interesting, thoughtful women duriing my trip.

[chuchok]

Define professional....

[Sir Burr]

I would love to go hiking with this woman.

Never met a Thai woman from any level of society that would voluntarily walk anywhere, especially outdoors. They don't want to get dark.

[Phil Conners]

Sure they exist and are found just like you'd find a woman any other place in the world (i.e. no simple answer).

[Thaipwriter]

Schools, banks, and in your dreams

[friendly_yankee]

Thanks all. I wasn't really asking if such women exist. I know that they do!

I am just wondering if there are any bars that single professional Thai women might go to with their friends on a regular basis.

I realize that it's just like meeting women in any part of the world. Figured that people who have been here for a while might have a sense of what bars cater to what types of people.

If anyone has suggestions, that would be great. If not, I can check out something like MATCH.COM.

FY

[Phil Conners]

You might want to consider slightly modifying your greeting ... FY could easily be misunderstood

[Maejo Man]

I am a man who is in CM for two weeks. What is the best way for me to meet smart, professional Thai women between the ages of 30 and 50?

The sort of woman that you are looking for surely exists in hospital staff, hotel management, university faculty, and any large business in Chiangmai, but I doubt that you are going to meet any of them in two weeks.

I'm not trying to be negative, but unless you happen to be in their "social circle" or are introduced to them, the future is dismal. These are not the type of ladies that are susceptible to "pick up" lines, and will often turn away when aproached.

If you are lucky enough to find one, don't be surprised when she turns up with a family member or a close friend. You'll be stuck with the chaperone for some time.

All this seems reminiscent of the Quest for the Holy Grail

[p1p]

The sort of woman that you are looking for surely exists in hospital staff, hotel management, university faculty, and any large business in Chiangmai, but I doubt that you are going to meet any of them in two weeks.

I'm not trying to be negative, but unless you happen to be in their "social circle" or are introduced to them, the future is dismal. These are not the type of ladies that are susceptible to "pick up" lines, and will often turn away when aproached.

If you are lucky enough to find one, don't be surprised when she turns up with a family member or a close friend. You'll be stuck with the chaperone for some time.

All this seems reminiscent of the Quest for the Holy Grail

Very true. You will be highly unlikely to build any type of relationship/friendship with any Thai lady without becoming a member of their social circle - or staff member in the same organisation.

Chaperoning can, depending on the lady concerned, last for a year or more. My wife was chaperoned for at least that long.

Schools, banks, and in your dreams

Having written the above - I was "picked up" in a bank and invited out to lunch the other day! A most interesting experiennce which occurred only because of my command of the Thai language!

I had a most enjoyable lunch with the lady and her friend.

[Maejo Man]

Having written the above - I was "picked up" in a bank and invited out to lunch the other day! A most interesting experiennce which occurred only because of my command of the Thai language!

I had a most enjoyable lunch with the lady and her friend.

I'll pay that one P nice effort I had a similar experience with a banking lady, but it was by phone!

I had occasion to call head office in Bangkok to have another moan about some screw up, and got passed onto the manager of the overseas transactions department. We got chatting, and one thing led to another, and before I knew it I had her mobile number and a date with her the following weekend in Chiangmai. She arrived, stayed the weekend, BUT slept in the spare bedroom with three track suits on and the door locked!

[jackr]

Having written the above - I was "picked up" in a bank and invited out to lunch the other day! A most interesting experiennce which occurred only because of my command of the Thai language!

I had a most enjoyable lunch with the lady and her friend.

I'll pay that one P nice effort I had a similar experience with a banking lady, but it was by phone!

I had occasion to call head office in Bangkok to have another moan about some screw up, and got passed onto the manager of the overseas transactions department. We got chatting, and one thing led to another, and before I knew it I had her mobile number and a date with her the following weekend in Chiangmai. She arrived, stayed the weekend, BUT slept in the spare bedroom with three track suits on and the door locked!

Yep, gonna be tough to find a lady like that in any bar, although your best bet would be at one of the smarter places along Thanon Nimmanhemin in between the city and the mountain (west). Failing that, you could spend a few afternoons loitering in the Rimping supermarket on the Mae Jo road... some very smart specimens do their shopping here, although, as others say, getting anywhere in two weeks is going to be a battle. Go fot it!

Good luck

[Maejo Man]

Failing that, you could spend a few afternoons loitering in the Rimping supermarket on the Mae Jo road... some very smart specimens do their shopping here................

I thought you still got locked up for loitering Jackr or was that loitering with intent?

[meadish_sweetball]

Try checking out the art galleries and CMU.

But I agree with the rest here. There is no real singles scene, Thai men and women over the age of 20 very rarely form one to one friendships, and chaperoning is still very much alive.

That being said, you never know who you might meet. Two weeks is a very short time though.

[friendly_yankee]

Hello everyone,

Thanks for the range of responses to my original message. This is very helpful -- especially the point about Thai men and women not participating in many one-to-one friendships after the age of 20. Having lived in Asia off and on for a few years, I really should have know this already. It's amazing how just a few months back home can set one back so far in terms of cultural (mis)understanding.

Other people seemed to think I was hoping for a quick romp in the hay! Really, this was not my goal. And I don't really have any good pick-up lines.

It is OK. I know that my situation next month in Bangkok will be bring me into contact with more people through an established social circle. I was just wondering if there were any places in town that offered a slightly different scene than the more well-known bars. I'll check out the bars on Thanon Nimmanhemin.

Thanks again. This forum is a pretty cool resource. I hope the moderators are preserving a copy of all these conversations as a historical record of Thai-farang interaction during the globalization phase of the early 21st century! Future historians will get a kick out of this.

[The Dan Sai Kid]

I was reading your old posts - did you not have any luck looking for western women?

[jackr]

Failing that, you could spend a few afternoons loitering in the Rimping supermarket on the Mae Jo road... some very smart specimens do their shopping here................

I thought you still got locked up for loitering Jackr or was that loitering with intent?

Loitering in-a-tent?

[Maejo Man]

Loitering in-a-tent?

Groan

[Johpa]

I am almost 40. I am young at heart, and I look very young. But I want to talk to strong, experienced women. I don't want to do the bar scene.

I am a man who is in CM for two weeks. What is the best way for me to meet smart, professional Thai women between the ages of 30 and 50?

Well I doubt that given only 2 weeks you are likely to find what you are looking for. That being said, most Thai women over the age of 30 who are still single consider their chances of finding a Thai mate to be a lost cause. Most would be happy to be asked out on a dinner date, but expect them to bring a friend along, and not for fantasy 3-some. You would need to have a chance encounter with one who happens to speak English. You might get lucky when visiting museums, galleries, or some higher end shops. But as a tourist, you have know way of knowing whether you have met a single professional Thai woman who happens to be over the age of 30, or an over-the-hill "professional" who happens to be over the age of 30.

[Ulysses G.]

But as a tourist, you have know way of knowing whether you have met a single professional Thai woman who happens to be over the age of 30, or an over-the-hill "professional" who happens to be over the age of 30.

A lot of women at Sayuri seem to be over 30 and very professional!

[chanchao]

Ok, sorry to arrive at this topic a bit late, but I think I'm taking a more positive-than-average stance here.

Your one and only true problem is that you only have two weeks.

One way to address that problem is by starting early, through Thai community/friends/portal websites. This works best if you read/write some Thai, but really it doesn't hurt to put out some feelers in English, or perhaps along with a short personal profile/bio written by someone for you in Thai.

Chaperoning...: Well... That's a word.. . While I don't doubt that true chaperoning still happens, I think it's most definitley on the decline.. And hey, women over thirty is kind of the same as women over 50 in the West: they may discover some new eagerness in building relationships, no matter what the alledged ancient cultural code says.. But of course a first date is actually best arranged when she brings a friend.. Makes for a more comfortable experience for all.

And 'where' to meet.. I don't think bars/pubs are all that suitable.. Most women over thirty don't party that hard, and when they're out it's usually at a bigger pub/restaurant on a company outing, i.e. in a group of at least 20 friends or collegues... Not impossible to fish in that pond, but she'd have to had a few Wine Cooler Clubs or else her 20 collegues would gossip her to death for as much as smiling at you.

So I think non-entertainment environments are actually best. Which is good because you can do it during the day. And where specifically.... beats me.. Companies, libraries, universities (specifically the MBA aunties), *whatever field you're in professionally*, sports, (gyms), hobbies..

I'll ask my wife if some of her more desperate 30+ folks in her MBA class are still available. So introductions are actually VERY important. Don't be shy telling absolutely everyone and their dog that you're still single. Doesn't matter if you're actually interested in them or not, they will know people (who know people). It's not unlike finding a house or a job or an employee really.

But two weeks is short: Start today. The internet is your friend.

Cheers,

Chanchao