Isaan girls

[Kenny202]

Mate brought his new GF over yesterday. As usual after they left the missus had the full run down on her. Don't know how they do it but seems to happen everytime? Like they might only natter together for 15 minutes but in that time she'll know all of the girls past, her family, how much money her farang BF has and how much he's giving her or her family. Always worries me the missus is airing our personal business as well although she said she isn't. In this case the mates chosen unwisely. She's way too young for him (45 vs 18). She puts on the doting gf act but she's told my missus she feels embarrassed going out with my friend. He's too tall, too old etc. She has to change her dress style to suit him (he's told her to cover up a bit as she dresses like a total hoe). He's too controlling (he doesn't like her going to parties alone etc). In a nutshell a lot of complaining and bottom line she has no feelings for him apart from her mother insisting she pursues the farang atm. She also told the missus she has friends working the bars and judging by her level of reasonable English for an uneducated 18yo from a village, I dare say shes been on the game for a while too. My mate has good intentions, considering paying some tuition for her, giving her a small allowance. Obviously shes totally unsuitable and one could say what does he expect but...mates been around Thailand for years too so should know better. A few things stand out to me...

Firstly why do Thai women do this when they get together and how do they extract so much information in a short time? I thought Thais were reserved and shy...however that could depend on class. In my experience the last thing a thai woman can trust is another Thai woman. Why do they spill their guts like this to a complete stranger? She's not worried my missus will tell me and I'll tell my mate?

My poor mate thinks he Xmas. Hes telling everyone how fantastic she is...poor kid smitten with him etc and shes getting around behind his back saying she's only using him.....to his friends! Talk about bite the hand that feeds you.

I tried to explain how wrong it was to my missus and we ended up having a blue. She doesn't like the girl but she doesn't seem to get "the point". It's like because she's putting out he owes the girl. I told my missus if shes not into him why doesnt she break it off? Mrs says because she doesn't want to hurt his feelings. I say...well isn't extracting money from someone, accepting their generosity and then openly white anting and embarrassing him behind his back far worse than breaking it off? They seem to think farang are a different species and dropped in Thailand for their manipulation and amusement. Mind u the missus has her own agenda ie worried I'll get ideas of finding a young bird like that. Amazing the psyche of some Thai people. What's in it for me.

[JJGreen]

Your buddy is 45...well into adulthood now.

He can make his own choices and mistakes

[Razzler1973]

Your mate is 45 and his GF is 18 and her Mum insists she 'pursue the farang' and you think she may be or have been on the game. Good work there, detective He gives her a small allowance too. Case cracked!!

 

 

[SoiBiker]

How do they do it?

 

You know those funny noises they make at each other? Turns out its actually a language! 

 

I wonder what your 'missus' told her about you?

[JJGreen]

How do they do it?

 

You know those funny noises they make at each other? Turns out its actually a language! 

 

I wonder what your 'missus' told her about you?

His missus is different

[Kwasaki]

Sounds like the norm thing to me,  let your mate get on with it,  your not jealous are you  don't see why you can't get answers from your wife.

Whats the lsaan girl title for and what's a hoe is she a gardener.

[sipi]

That's  terrible. 

Women outside of Thailand would never gossip about their partner. 

[sakaew]

Well Kenny, allow me to make a couple of comments. I haven't heard the term "spill their guts" for MANY MANY years. It bought a smile to my lips. Thank heavens there are a few of us oldies still breathing. Nowadays the teenyboppers are in a big rush to show how cool they are by aping the latest American slang. So thanks for that.

 

Thai village women are a class unto themselves. I've had 2 long term relationships with village women.....and 2 with well educated , well off middle class women. I am no expert, but I can talk with a modicum of authority about some aspects of those 4. The two village girls were by no means alike....well no more than superficially anyway. One was still baan nork (country bumpkin) after 7 years. No attempt to get education, feet on seats, lie to help family. The usual hallmarks of the rapacious Issarn maidens, inured since to birth to believe farang exist only to supply their wants. Similar I'd suggest, to your wife's friend. The other Issarn lady got stuck into tertiary education in Thailand, and I'll have her in University in Perth in the near future. Absolutely no sneakiness and dishonesty. She has a daughter, who calls me Paw, and I have been her father for 8 years. Both of us love her to death.

 

As for the 2 middle class ladies, they were pretty much the same as me, in pretty much most ways. as alike as chalk and chesses, compared to the bush ladies. THEY gave stuff to me, they never wanted money. Both of them were well educated and had well paying jobs.

 

In a nutshell, good reliable, responsible, honest women are where you find them. But if you want to get away from the grafters, get on to Thai Visa or whatever it's called now. There are lots of educated women available.It goes without saying, well educated women...are looking for a partner with similar attributes

[Gecko123]

I want to compliment the OP for his powers of observation and honesty in recounting what really happens behind closed doors after foreigners with Thai wives meet one another. Anyone who is honest with themselves has to admit (even if they want to pretend otherwise here) that the OP's description of the wife's ability to ferret out information and the foreign husband's schadenfreude at listening to dirt about another farang/Thai couple is spot on. As far as I am concerned, anyone who wants to pretend this never happens, is either clueless or just telling internet forum porkies.

 

JJ Green asked on an earlier thread why some guys act as if they "want to be the only farang on the block." What Kenny202 has described here provides further excellent insight into why this sometimes happens. It may have little to do with you. Rather, the already established foreigner may have received a "scouting report" on your girlfriend's background making it advisable to steer clear of you - not as an individual - but as a couple.

 

In small villages and towns, there really are no secrets. The Thai woman's work, school, sexual, marital, medical, credit, criminal, and family histories are all known to others. No, not every last detail is known by every last person, but when a village girl shows up with a foreigner in tow, tongues start wagging and there's a wildfire exchange of information. Even if Nattanicha isn't intimately familiar with the girl's background, there is no shortage of people who can fill her in if she wants to know the skinny.

 

If, for example, an already established foreigner knows (through his girlfriend or otherwise), that a newly arrived foreigner's girlfriend has brought numerous foreign guys back to the village in the past, naturally he is going to be leary of befriending you if he doesn't believe the relationship is going to last. He also doesn't want to get involved with you because it's impossible to give you a head's up about your girl friend/wife's past. He knows that if he spills the beans, you will run home and confront your wife, citing him as the source of the information, you will leave town, leaving him to deal with an enemy for life (i.e., the girl he spilled the beans about). In these types of situations, clearly the wisest course of action is to steer clear and keep quiet.

 

 

[Scotwight]

All Thai people are not alike.  All women are not alike.  All posters on Thai Visa might be alike.  

[Peterw42]

Interesting thread OP, I have found myself in similar situations. I think you could replace Issan girls with Thai girls. 

I have been in the reverse situation, My girlfriend has a long term girlfriend who also has a western partner, early on in the relationship I was introduced as the new boyfriend. I chatted for 20 mins with the other westerner and we had the low down on each other. How much to get the car serviced, Internet D/L speed, how many English channels on the cable TV. I dont think the Thai girlfriends even came up

 

 

[ClutchClark]

Am I the only one who completely loses track of time by setting eyes on Peterw42 avatar above.

[Headgame]

Make sure your friend reads the following (previously posted).

Headgame’s 14 Rules to Live By (for older guys with a young TGF)

These rules have been “field tested” and have proven to be very effective. Like all rules, there will be exceptions.
 

1     1. NEVER GET MARRIED.

2. Love is for teenagers – grow up.

3. Do not confuse contentment and happiness with love.

4. Do appropriate research before entering a cohabitation relationship. That does not mean having lots of sex. That means, researching like you would before making any investment.  Know what you’re getting into before you get into it.

5. You are not Sir Galahad. You can never save anyone else from themselves.

6. Do not ever overstate your financial situation. Never lie, just be very vague.

7. If you’re going to be providing any financial support, set a realistic monthly allowance for your mate at the outset of any period of cohabitation.

8.  Be prepared to ALWAYS SAY NO when the inevitable requests are made for any additional money. Be prepared because those requests will happen.

9. Never be vague about requests for extra money, i.e. “I’ll think about it” / “Maybe”. JUST SAY NO. You can always change your mind when you’ve had a pressure-free opportunity to think about it.

10. If your sweetie gets all twisted up because you said no to something, just tell her that you understand she’s upset and she has 24 hours to get back on track or she can go home to mommy or whatever.

11. Mean what you say, and say what you mean.

12. If your sweetie is lazy, either adjust your expectations or walk. It will NEVER get better.

13. If your sweetie is prone to ridiculous and unprovoked temper tantrums, then recognize you just chose the wrong lady. Either pack her up or pack yourself up. Either approach requires decisive action.

14. NEVER be weak or indecisive.

 

By now you should know these rules but if not, read, then memorize and apply. Live long. Live happy.

Edited August 30, 2016 by Headgame
add formatting

[Emster23]

"Fools rush in..... where wise men never go...." as the song tells us

[12DrinkMore]

38 minutes ago, Emster23 said:

"Fools rush in..... where wise men never go...." as the song tells us

 

"Young genitals will turn a wise old man into a brainless old fool".

[Altalake]

In Hong Kong, the Filipinos would  be on the chat show radio frequently & often, saying "my friend" asks this and that/my friend wants to know,.....

 

It was not the "friend" at all, it was them all along; I reckon many of the posts that ask/comment about the "friend" is the Poster, not a friend.

 

Why not be honest as to who is writing!

 

As for Kenny 202 (or his "friend"), good grief....

[RickBradford]

15: Make sure you're worth more alive than dead

[MissAndry]

2 hours ago, Scotwight said:

All Thai people are not alike.  All women are not alike.  All posters on Thai Visa might be alike.  

 

All old foreign guys living in a Thai village with a much younger Thai girl are alike.

 

Two great posts from Gecko and Headgame.

@Kenny, your misses gave out as much info as she received.

Edited August 30, 2016 by MissAndry

[ClutchClark]

Just now, MissAndry said:

 

All old foreign guys living in a Thai village with a much younger Thai girl are alike.

 

Grinning from ear to ear ?

[wanderluster]

i skipped over all the replies, so if i am repeating something someone else said i am sorry.  but what the <deleted> are you doing with a "lady" like that. skip your friend.. ok he is young and has to learn the hard way. but what about you.

If your "MRS" is talking this bad about another lady, what is she talking about you....  

stop think roll and listen  --  there might be a fire all around you

[petermik]

Isn,t love wonderful  

[Kenny202]

No intention of saying anything to the mate nor was the point of the post about the age difference more so the mercenary attitude of the girl. It is a mate too. He'd probably agree I have enough issues with my own

[Agent Sumo]

I've lost count of the number of times some deadbeat Thai woman has taken offence when I've declined her offer to be my "teerak".

They think that because I live in a half decent area/condo and appear to have a few baht, all I need to complete the "set" is a financial leech/sponge with the education of a 10 year old Western kid.

 

I would die of embarrassment if I had to introduce some illiterate, pidgin English-speaking clown to my friends. 

 

I'm certainly not saying that they're all like that but when a woman has little else but access to her genitalia to offer as a unique selling point, she's certainly not the type you want to develop an attachment to. 

 

Sex is great but it's not worth slumming for

Edited August 30, 2016 by Agent Sumo

[SoiBiker]

What a depressing insight into what passes for a 'relationship' for many expats here. Living the dream, guys. Living the dream.

[bark]

Alice Cooper Song " Eighteen " 

 

[JJGreen]

Am I the only one who completely loses track of time by setting eyes on Peterw42 avatar above.

Can't see avatars on Tapatalk app

[Phom]

19 hours ago, sipi said:

That's  terrible. 

Women outside of Thailand would never gossip about their partner. 

Really the entire planet of females outside Thailand would never do that?

Wow, bold statement what statistics do you have to back that up?

 

I had one Australian girlfriend who was a terible gambler, are they all gamblers by that reasoning?

[1FinickyOne]

The conversations like this are direct and to the point. The details only take a minute. I have listened to them, even with ladies who married the Westerner who is somewhat duped. What your wife knew immediately was that the guy was simply a customer. She would no more step in than she would if someone were buying tires in a store - you don't sabotage that. If he does not know he is a customer, well, better for her but your wife knows it is not her job to explain. 

 

And by the way, anything that I have seen w/Thai & Western relationships, I have also seen  with Thai/Thai... 

 

And yes, money is a factor in Western relationships... how many moms and dads would rather see their daughter marry a young doctor than a sensitive, unemployed poet? 

[SoiBiker]

Just now, Phom said:

Really the entire planet of females outside Thailand would never do that?

Wow, bold statement what statistics do you have to back that up?

 

I had one Australian girlfriend who was a terible gambler, are they all gamblers by that reasoning?

 

You might just have missed a little sarcasm there.

[little mary sunshine]

S S D D... Time for golf!